Duncan and I made our way out to the castle gate to meet with the rest of the group, who were already waiting for us as we were the last to arrive. Max was also there to wish us goodbye and good luck on our journey. Unless you were Chad, as I’m fairly sure I heard a recommendation that he should “fall off his horse into a steaming pile of dung.” He was still pretty pissed about Chad’s treatment of me after my transformation.

I waited until Max was finished with all his goodbyes and then he approached me. I had been working up the courage for this since the training hall, and I mustered all I had to give him a huge hug. I held back grateful tears and whispered, “Thank you.”

Like Ash, he was now taller than me, where before we had stood eye to eye, and now I was able to easily bury my face in his firm chest. Goddess, he smelled so good. He held me tightly and returned the embrace with one arm as his other hand rested on the top of my head.

“I did nothing, only what a good friend would do.” He paused before adding, “I just wish I could say the same for my brother.”

I finally released him and adjusted my glasses as I pulled away, but he held me firmly by my shoulders and looked deeply into my eyes. I nervously blinked a few times to see if I could break his gaze, but he held fast.

“I still see you in there, you know. The you that Obarith and Chadwick think is a lie? An illusion? The hope given to you, and the rest of us, by the Goddess.” He tapped me on my forehead, “She’s still in here,” he then tapped me on my chest, “but also in here.” He smiled at me as I looked back up at him. “You just have to find her again.”

I held back more tears. “I will repay you for this one day. All of this.” I gestured to myself and the dagger in my fist. “And I’m sorry about the hairpin. It was a beautiful gift. Tell your mother I loved it.”

His face beamed some more, “I already have.” He blinked away some tears of his own, then straightened up, “And I plan to march right up to the temple after you leave and demand that jerk give it back! I don’t care if it was Obarith, it wasn’t given to you so another could take it away!”

I smiled. I knew he was trying to lighten the mood, and he at least put on a good show.

He then took the dagger from me and spun me around. “I’m surprised Duncan didn’t help you with strapping this on yet!” I could feel some movement and a tugging around my belt, then Max stepped back, and I turned to face him again.

“There! Try it out!”

I groped behind me until I found the handle, stowed at a perfect location for easy access on my lower back, and he’d already positioned it correctly for my dominant hand too. I looked at him in surprise.

He shrugged, “Wasn’t hard to figure out with that swing from yesterday. Odd that you favor your left, but who am I to judge? You also like my brother!” He punched me playfully in my arm.

Before I could adamantly dispute the claim, Dorian walked over and put an arm around my shoulders. “Come on Max, we’ve got places to go! Leave the girl be! You aren’t 18 for another couple of weeks yet, so keep your pants on and get in line!”

My mouth dropped open as I looked up at Dorian and then back at Max.

A couple of weeks?!

Max just winked back, “It’s hard to do that when they look so good on her already!” He saluted to a flustered Dorian, then bowed to me with a flourish, spun on his heels and marched off back towards the castle.

I shook my head. Maybe Kit wasn’t the one I needed to keep the closest eye on after all.

Dorian and I walked back over to where everyone were loading up. We were going to have a dozen other soldiers with us, not including Duncan. Add in the sons from the four Houses, Ash, and myself, and we were just shy of 20. From the formation of horses, it looked like the boys and I were to be riding in the middle of the pack, with Duncan at the lead.

I found my horse nearest Ash, and he was prepping both his and mine when I walked up. “You ready for this Amelia? Sounds like it’s going to be a real adventure!” He asked, excitedly.

I gave him a small smile, “As ready as I’ll ever be.” Butterflies were everywhere in my stomach. “You nervous?” I asked.

He shook his head, “The Goddess will look after us. I have no fear of that.”

I really wanted to share in his faith, but the last couple of days had shaken me to my core. I merely bobbed my head in acknowledgement instead.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two hours in, and my bony ass was ready to call it quits. I would have never thought horseback riding would end up being the reason I would miss my extra cushioning. We road north out of the capital and stayed on the main road towards Blackwall. Most of the ride was made in silence, with some occasional banter between the soldiers. Kit attempted to be sociable with the rest of us, but there was too much tension in the air between all the boys, and none of them wished to humor him. This resulted in him quickly resorting to practical jokes at our expense.

Julius was usually the target of his jokes, as I quickly learned was common for the two of them. Kit enjoyed watching Julius’ serious demeanor become unglued after each prank. The first one was to glue Julius to his own saddle with an adhesive, ruining a set of robes and forcing Julius to vigorously clean the saddle before he could use it again. A second was to steal his glasses and mount them on Kit’s own horse’s head. It took Julius hours to find them. Finally, and my favorite, Kit hid horse poop in his sleeping roll, forcing him to tear apart his belongings to find it. Fortunately for Julius, he had at least wrapped it in some cloth so that it wasn’t a larger problem once found.

I learned Julius was used to Kit’s mischief, and fortunately had several changes of clothes already prepared for the trip. By day four, he had already worn a new robe each day. He had, in turn, lit various belongings of Kit’s on fire, and he was down a couple pairs of pants as well.

Dorian filled me in on Kit and Julius’ feuding, and I finally got to hear more about Julius. I learned he was an accomplished mage from the prominent college city known as Priorart. Many of the scholars at the college city studied a variety of things, but as magic held the most mystery to humankind, it was one of their heavier focuses of interest. Since I had already been exposed early on to magic through the Magos family, I had just assumed magic was commonplace in Eitania. It was surprising to learn that, while magic was found frequently enough here, it was the other races blessed with its influence, and humanity, with few exceptions, was left out in the cold. Julius was one of them.

Through rigorous study, he had learned to channel the various elements found in nature, if only in small doses. It took him considerable concentration, with mental and physical strain, to continuously channel something larger than a simple fire source or a jolt of water or lightning in the palm of his hand. Gusts of wind were generally not too challenging, but without more control, they didn’t have the offensive capabilities of the other resources at hand. Still, he was one of the few magic wielders that chose to also become a scholar and share their knowledge about their gift. He was considered an odd duck in the kingdom, even amongst his peers, and a quirky ally amongst our group.

In more ways than one.

I eyed each of the heirs as we rode, all but Kit wearing an expression that showed they were focused on what was ahead. There was so much animosity between the four of them. They each held a rivalry with one another, but I was starting to realize that something went way deeper between them. And, for each of them, their pride was also getting in the way. These were the boys, no, the men who were going to be leading mankind against the problems that still threatened their existence. I could see now why the Goddess was afraid for their future. None of them were ready.

I still didn’t know what she expected me to do about it, however. This group was a powder keg. If not for Duncan, this mission would have failed before we had even gotten out of Torzoa. They were impulsive and reckless around each other and created further complications for the rest of us. Ash and I had our work cut out for us to try and act as a neutral party in any squabbles, and they wouldn’t even listen to me as I was now.

Was Max right? Did Amelia still exist in me, deep down? Or had I only been confident as Amelia because of the Goddess’ gifts in the first place?

“What’s on your mind?”

I was shaken from my thoughts by Ash, who had ridden his horse a little closer for a private conversation with me.

I smiled and tried to lie, “That I wish pillows for saddles had been invented before we made this trip.”

His expression didn’t change as he stared at me, seeing through my banter, “Come on, Amelia. I know when you’re lost in thought about something. You’re chewing on one of your strings again, for Goddess’ sake!”

I hurriedly spit it out, “Am not!”

He playfully smirked, but poked further, “You have to tell someone.” At that, he decided to tease a bit, “I can always invite Prince Chadwick over, and you can have a heart-to-heart with him, if you would like.”

I scoffed at his ribbing. Dorian and Ash had dropped the “Chad” moniker since his sour mood reached its apex after our meeting with the king, and even Dorian had decided poking the bear would be more trouble than it was worth.

But Ash was right. I needed to be able to confide in someone on this trip. It was either him or Duncan. And while Duncan had proven to be sensitive to what I was going through, he still didn’t understand my situation. Not in the way Ash did.

Eventually I relented, “I’m worried about everyone, Ash. You can tell each of the boys aren’t exactly friendly with each other. They let their pride get in the way of everything, they tease each other relentlessly! None of them seem to share the same beliefs or values or… anything!”

He nodded along in agreement.

“They all come from different backgrounds, Amelia. Different beliefs. You heard Dorian on the way over here. He still holds a belief and reverence in the Goddess to some extent. But one mention of her to Chadwick and you saw how he got.” He shrugged, to add emphasis that he also didn’t know what to do.

“Each of them is from a family line of a different God of Light, with their own structure and goals. You’d think that Obarith, as the head of the Gods, would work to keep everyone aligned, but it seems like the Crown is just further pushing them apart. As frustrating and difficult as it is, this was probably another reason the Goddess intervened, with you intended as her voice of reason.”

I nodded; my eyes downcast.

“Yeah, I’d already come to that conclusion myself, thus my concern. I don’t even know how to go about uniting them, especially now that I’m not someone they will respect. And Kit and Julius don’t know me from a hole in the ground. At least with Dorian and Chad, they supported me as Amelia. But now?”

I waved at Chad, who had meandered away from our group early on and had joined Duncan at the front, “Now Chad wishes I didn’t even exist. He sees me as an inconvenience at best, and an insult to his beliefs and dreams at worst.” I slumped in my saddle. “And the worst part is I don’t even know why I care. He’s arrogant, self-centered, and ignores everyone else’s feelings!”

Ash mulled this over a bit. “It sounds like you both have some unresolved issues you need to air out. It may not solve anything in the short term, and I can’t speak for the prince, but you’ll probably feel better if you get whatever you’re feeling towards him off your chest.”

I sighed again. Ash was right. Chad and I couldn’t keep this tension between the two of us going. It had to stop. And I was confident that, if we could patch things up, his mood would improve significantly.

I noticed Ash staring at me while I pondered our discussion. I gave him a wry smile and merely replied sarcastically, “Thanks, Mom.”

Ash smiled and patted me softly, “Don’t worry. I’m sure if we work together, we’ll think of something to improve the mood of our group before we make it to Blackwall. Have faith.”

I smiled back at him.

If only it were that easy.

It was then I remembered I had a favor to ask him, and I tossed him my Chad doll from the festival. It was riddled with pin holes from where I had stuck it, hoping with each poke that the real Chad would yelp out in surprise.

“Can you do some repair work on this please?” I asked.

Ash caught the doll and stared at it with a puzzled expression.

“I just repaired this for Dorian yesterday! What happened to it between then and now?? And why do you have his Chad doll?”

I couldn’t control the grin that crept on my face as I realized Dorian had also bought a Chad doll at the tournament and had been torturing it in the same manner as I had been. Then he had asked Ash to repair it, only to have me turn around and just do the same thing just now! As I put two and two together, I burst into laughter and rode ahead, not bothering to clear up poor Ash’s obvious confusion.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Our trip to Blackwall mirrored our earlier trip to Torzoa: wake with the light and ride all day until shortly before sunset, then make camp. Rinse, repeat. However, since we were on one of the main roads out of the capital, and towards an important location in the kingdom, our trip didn’t feel like we were tramping through the back roads of the kingdom, like much of our journey from Bronzemead.

Every other day, there was a shakeup in our trip, as we traveled through some small town or settlement, momentarily stopping for a short rest before starting back up again. In our haste to get to our destination, we didn’t stay anywhere long enough to really mingle with the locals or enjoy more than a quick bite to eat, but it was nice to experience more of the kingdom. It was good to see places like Bronzemead existed elsewhere in Monera, and that its citizens spent their days worrying about the smaller things in life rather than the greater dangers and politics of the world. I found myself wondering what the Magos’ were doing while Ash and I were away.

Our late afternoons and evenings were spent around a makeshift campsite, eating and relaxing, unless you were Ash or me. Duncan required training exercises with my new dagger and get used to more close quarters combat. He also put together an exercise regimen to increase my cardio as much as possible before our trip was over. Ash chose to train alongside with us for the same reasons. Duncan had not made his sessions mandatory, but Ash had taken it upon himself to continue to train with his staff, both in combat as well as synchronizing his powers with it.

Like Julius, Ash could only really get the staff to react and enhance his capabilities with much physical and mental strain. He had been working at it slowly since we left Bronzemead and had started successfully coxing more than the flicker from his first attempt from the moonstone. But since my transformation, he had been pushing himself harder and it frequently left him with serious headaches and the occasional nosebleed. He was trying so hard for me, so it was the least I could do to return the favor and try hard for him.

Duncan appreciated the extra training assistance Ash was offering, as it gave me a reliable sparring partner who also wouldn’t make training harder than it had to be. In my new state, it was already tougher than it had ever been.

One of the first things I noticed when we started out was that I was so much slower than before. My physical reaction time, limbs reacting to my requests for immediate movement, my speed. Everything felt like moving through molasses. I was further infuriated with this because the clothing and weapon choices Duncan and I had decided on were designed to allow me to be faster and take advantage of heavier armored opponents. Ash had convinced Duncan that I had gone through pretty strenuous hand-to-hand combat training, and so Duncan had the two of us start there.

That lasted an afternoon.

Ash’s training over the past few months with his sister, and then Chad and Dorian, had increased his strength as well, and I was no longer a match for him. He still wasn’t as good as Noelle, but he was now stronger and bigger than me. Add in my slower speed, and I failed to get in a hit or get him on the ground even once, while instead he was able to easily throw me around like a rag doll. I became very self-conscious about what used to be a strength of mine, and I began to throw myself into my dagger training.

Not that it ended up making much difference.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was late blocking a swing from Ash as his staff swept my legs out from under me and I fell unceremoniously on my back, yet again. I rolled over and slapped the ground in frustration as I grit my teeth. Duncan knew that, as Amy, training with Chad, Dorian, or any of the other experienced men in our group would be far too challenging for me. He had hoped that I would at least be able to keep up with Ash.

“‘Cause that’s working so well…” I muttered, as I got up off the ground.

To his credit, with all the training he had been getting, he was steadily improving with the staff. His attacks and reactions had gotten faster, and he was making fewer mistakes. Which was great for him! Not so great for me. I still didn’t think he could have beaten any of the other boys in a fight, but in my now limited state, he was more than a match for me.

He wiped some sweat off his brow with the back of his forearm and extended a hand to help me up. He was shirtless and covered in sweat. Summer was around the corner and the days were getting hotter, not cooling down until the sun had long set. I had removed my hoodie, per my agreement with Duncan, but had no further layers I was willing to lose and was dripping with sweat in my full leathers.

I desperately missed air conditioning.

Duncan was shaking his head, “It is imperative that you are able to read and predict your opponent’s movements when close combat is your only option,” he waved at Ash’s staff, “especially when they have reach on you.”

Yet another reason Duncan was pleased with Ash’s participation. Sparring against someone with a staff while I just held a dagger was a challenging prospect. Duncan was skilled with just about every weapon I had seen him pick up, including Minerva, whom he had asked permission to wield in my stead, so he could test her recent adjustments. But he wanted me to spar with someone at my perceived skill level, and so he declined to teach me directly. After some threatening from Duncan, Kit had given a couple of demonstrations with dagger combat during our first afternoon, but he didn’t take it seriously and laughed off the idea of teaching longer than a few minutes.

I shook my head to myself at Duncan’s admonishing. Reading Ash hadn’t been the problem. I learned enough from Dorian and Chad months ago and was past that stage of my training. My main struggle was having the speed to react to what I knew an opponent was doing. I just wished I wasn’t so slow.

I was regretting every gym class I had ever skipped as I sighed and got into position again, reverse grip on Lily. Taking the offensive, I rushed at him in a manner that an onlooker probably mistook for a slow jog and grabbed for his staff with one hand while attempting to kick out at his knee. In response, he swung the staff away easily, twirled the end up to knock the dagger from my hand, and then brought the head up to clock me in the back of my neck. I fell forward on my hands and knees, disarmed. I stared at the ground angrily and dug my empty fingers into the dirt.

Duncan rubbed his chin, “I’m not sure how to further teach you. You’ve grasped the basics, you just lack the speed to take advantage of them. It looks like the remainder of our training, until we reach Blackwall, should work towards increasing your speed and agility as best we can. It pains me to do this, but I think we need to start a walking schedule during the day.”

I picked myself up and dusted off my clothes. As exhausted as the thought of walking or running instead of riding horseback was, at least my ass would get a rest.

“Both of you clean yourselves up and then it’s time for dinner.” he ordered.

Ash helped me off the ground again and attempted to lighten the mood. “I hope Dorian managed to find something other than squirrel again,” he mused. “Regardless of your jests, it does not taste like chicken!”