Mira

Travelling with Asriel is interesting to say the least, he is so different now from how he was around other people. He seems at peace, to be one with Gaia to such an extent that even his steps don't mark the ground.

We walk at a steady pace, a strenuous pace for me but he doesn't slow for me nor do I complain. Looking at the unfamiliar landscape, the strange mountain lions that watch us pass I know that if I get left behind I won't last long here alone. Everything is wild, untouched by civilisation with the only trails game trails.

The man is an enigma. From seeing him fight, witnessing his prowess and unmerciful reckoning in battle I would expect a different personality. But the man sits for hours with butterflies swirling around him and he sketches. Reticent with his thoughts unless prompted with a direct question, otherwise speaking when giving instruction about something.

Asriel, the most fearsome warrior I have ever had the misfortune of meeting is an impressive artist. Even after seeing some of those Barbarian savages sketches I still don't understand half the things this man does or says.

We have been travelling these vast open grasslands for two days now. The place is captivating with its peace I won't lie and his sketches go a long way in doing this land the savages call the Tundra justice. Landscapes, animals, people, objects he sketches anything and everything while I rest and eat. I didn't decide to follow him so he could sketch flowers, snakes or foxes. I want more, I want a plan, direction.

"I can feel you scowling Mira," the frustrating man says. His eyes are closed as he does his daily meditation.

I relax my face. It's just another lucky guess, he couldn't possibly be able to feel me scowl; it's just a figure of speech.

"You need to learn to be present Mira. You are always thinking of the future, always planning your next move, the next step. Let tomorrow worry about itself. Focus on yourself now. What are you doing? Why are you doing it? Forget about it being good for you in the future, are you better now than you were yesterday? Are you enjoying yourself at this very second, is what you're doing and thinking about worth your life?"

I scowl again. I hate his insistent prattling when he does decide to speak but I take it seriously for consideration. You can't not take someone seriously after seeing what I've seen this man do.

I've always thought the 'martial way' as he called it, inferior to the way of the magician. Our kingdom is built around magisters; our caste system is to their benefit. The first monarchs of Sandaria were all mages.

All the old noble Houses can trace the first patriarchs or matriarchs of their families to powerful mages. Our judges, our government officials outside the Houses are magisters. The most influential people in the kingdom besides nobles are magisters. The politicians, the movers and shakers all have magic as a distinguishing attribute.

Even some Houses only still exist or have a say in the House of Lords because of backing from certain grandmasters of the art. Laws unto themselves grandmasters. The property of a grandmaster magician in Sandaria is the same as an embassy, sovereign in its own right.

If you enter it, you have entered at your own risk and there is nothing the kingdom can do for you if you're held against your will or killed outright. Even when said territory is within the bounds of a city.

I take a moment to consider Asriel's words. Am I enjoying myself? The answer is an unequivocal 'no'. The season is supposed to be Spring but the closer we get to those mountains the colder it gets.

I'm tired all the time now that I'm just a mundane, hungry too which isn't even the worst part of my crippling. Forget needing to eat every day, I need to eat every 10 hours unless we find something with ambient ether or a magical plant or creature. I shit almost as often, it's completely embarrassing, I'm like a child.

Not that there isn't enough to eat. The place is crawling with hares, snakes, foxes, birds; we even spotted a few antelopes from a distance. The problem is catching food.

The first few hours Asriel did everything for me. Showing me how to hunt using snares and a sling. Showing me how to skin and treat the meat. That was humbling in itself, realising I am helpless here without him. Then he let me fumble my way through it or starve. I had to resort to foraging for anything to eat before sleeping yesterday.

That's another thing. I'm drowsy after only 12 to 14 hours of activity. Not even a quarter of the day. I know I'm slowing us down but I really can't help it.

[Sigh].

Even before I Awakened I wasn't this weak. Why is it that I have been reduced to something that is even less than a mundane human? Should I not have just been bumped back to a mere mundane?

So no, I'm not enjoying myself. No, I can't help but think of a possible great future with a warm bath and a soft bed. No, I can't focus on the moment because I'm tired, sweaty, hungry and cold in the moment.

I sigh. I try to centre myself and meditate on my meridians as Master Zhen thought me. But there is nothing there, it's empty.

I can't even respond to all his patronizing. The man has forbidden me to speak. To speak?! 'Fucken' weirdo.

'Words are a distraction Mira. Besides, speaking is a poor way of commutating.' He said yesterday.

And with those words he did something to me with needles that prevented me from speaking.

I glare hatefully at his back. The man has no idea who he's dealing with.

It's the same treatment for two more days, 16 meals, 10 shits and 8 naps. I'm keeping count. The fact that my body is as resilient as a child's is extremely frustrating.

When master Zhen implied I'd slow them down he wasn't kidding. Even the ever-cool ever-patient Asriel is probably losing his cool, though he doesn't look it. He has had to renew the no speaking needlework twice now. I let him, not that I could have stopped him. But I have nothing to say to him anymore anyway.

Fuck you Asriel, wish a bird would shit on your bold head.

He just keeps making me meditate and prattles on about this philosophy of 'being present'. It's insidious. Making me think about it during these long periods of silence that pervade the natural sounds of the world.

Flowing wind, sweeping grass. A hunting hawk, the call of the great many owl griffins and a few wolves that hunt at night.

Spirits beyond! I even know what everything should sound like now!

We reach the woods that permeate the base of the vast mountains. They looked like normal mountains from a distance. We have a few in my province as well but the closer we get the more intimidating they look. There are three mountains separated by dozens of miles, they themselves spanning hundreds of miles in size. A more normal-looking mountain in the middle and two behemoths on either side of it.

Asriel says going through the woods between them then circling around will take too long. They are fat mountains with a circumference comparable to the entirety of the Maya province. Circling around them through the woods would therefore be equivalent to circling around an entire province instead of going through it.

We are aiming for the one on the right, Northeast. I need to get better with my directions as well. Just in case I get lost or need to get back from wherever we're going.

"I'm glad you finally decided to join us."

Asriel says to the air after lighting a fire and laying out the pans for me to cook with from that ring of holding he acquired. I have one as well but without mana it's nothing but a trinket to me.

I'm startled to my feet by a man emerging from the trees. He nods to Asriel, barely giving me a glance. He is one of these unwashed Barbarian savages his clothes and weapons show. Tall, sharp-eyed with wide shoulders and a narrow waist wearing a dagger, axe and bulging pouch on his rope of a belt. Scum barely human, good at nothing but killing.

I spit to convey my opinion. Not being able to talk makes gestures like this necessary. No, I'm not an uncouth savage but a lady reduced to this state by circumstance.

The savage kneels and bows his head to the ground before Asriel.

"Teach me please."

He says in very accented Sandersonian and stays like that. By the look of things, Asriel is as surprised as I am. He stays silent for a moment then walks to the savage and helps him up.

"What is your name?" He asks.

"Sachihiro van Damage of the Norse," the savage says. Long-winded as the name is it conveys a lot of information. These savages don't have family names. Their family names are all their father's first name so its Sachihiro son of Damage. What kind of caveman names his son 'Damage' anyways?

"Why didn't you go with the other group I sent away?" Asriel asks.

"I was too late. Besides, I want to make my own way."

"Having me as a teacher is not making your own way. You will still be walking the way I walked, influenced and biased by my thinking and opinions."

"Yes," the Barbarian says. "But it is the way currently less travelled and better than most as a start."

"Very well. I will teach you, but I will not be your teacher in a formal capacity. Like I am doing for Mira, I will help lay a foundation for you. One you will hopefully find someone to help you build upon."

The two men nod and clasps forearms.

"Have you been listening to my lessons these past few days or only uselessly following us."

"I have been listening."

"Good, will I need to silence you as well?"

"I can keep silent without help."

"Very well. Sit and listen," Asriel says and starts prattling again.

I didn't appreciate that little jab about needing help keeping silent. Nor the fact that I didn't notice a 200 pound 6'2" giant close enough to listen to Asriel 'teach'.

"Mira, have you ever missed anyone you were eager to see again? Think of your Master Zhen. Have you not missed him these past few days?"

'You have idea,' I want to say, but like always. I keep silent.

"Or a lover you wanted to get back to quickly while travelling away on a long journey Sachihiro. You miss that person, worry about them nonstop, wondering what they're doing and how they're getting on without you. Yearning for the day when you're finally reunited, never to be separated again. Expecting to do nothing but sit there beside them and gaze lovingly upon that dear face...

"But the moment your dream comes true, the anticipated eternal bliss lasts only a short while, growing duller with each passing minute. You celebrate being reunited, enjoy the euphoria that comes with realising a goal but then slowly you do your own separate things. You are there with them and after a while you have others things you miss, other things you'd rather be doing, another future 'something' to anticipate."

Asriel says looking at us as he skins the hares the savage brought.

"We romanticize the future, always yearning for it. Yearning for the day when things are better than they are now, the day we can finally enjoy life. By doing so we miss the moment, the now that we could be enjoying. The now that you were looking forward to you miss because you look further still for another future now. Have either of you not fallen into this trap?" He asks yet we can't respond.

"And even when that moment with your lover comes Sachihiro, Mira. You waste it longing for what will happen when you have intimate privacy or on some other anticipation we humans dream up."

His lecture goes on even as we eat. Long-winded, but like I said. Insidious, making more sense the more you listened to it.

"This is also helpful for some. It pushes them forward. Challenging themselves, bettering themselves in order to reach that 'brighter' day. Running further even when tired to reach those greener pastures. This is the human condition. Without goals, without challenges, without a future hope we become stagnant and stagnation leads to death. So what then must we do? How do we take control?

"That is a question you each will need to answer yourselves. My part is to teach you to be present and to meditate efficiently.'' Asriel seems pleased withhimself as he says this while taking the now skinned second hare to add to the falmes. ''When I am satisfied with that, I will teach you about chakra and the power sleeping in all creatures on Gaia. Power you don't need to Awaken to harness."

The fire sizzles as grease melts into it, my stomach rumbles to my eternal shame.

Smiling, Asriel breaks of a good looking piece without burning himself, ''eat.''

I eat.