On the top of the building complex, i stand. There isn't really anything cool about this rooftop. All you can see is the buildings and houses and the giant park.

It is really nothing special. But why am i here? I think it's because it's the most peaceful place in this town. In this day and age, aside from the working adults, that are heading into their homes , there is nothing to see.

In the park, what you can see is couple's or families that is enjoying the big fountain located on the center of the park.

Seriously, why am i even here? or so i ask myself. What is a young man like me doing in such building complex alone at night? Nothing, its not like i come here to smoke or do drugs . I just like this place, it has been years since im this healthy. God, it was a pain being sickly, you have to watch all these boring shows and stare at the white ceiling all day long.

Well enough about the stupid hospital. And let me ask again... Why am i here?

I have no idea, maybe because god is just messing around with me and probably puppet-ed me into going here? Come on God, please , i know you like playing the real life Sim's version, but don't do this often to me.

But being alone. I kinda like it. I don't have to listen nor do i have to talk. I just have to relax and stay still. But i do admit, that lately my life has been halted on a roadblock.

Confusion and choices , or i may say. Seriously what am i even doing? Urgggg, i have been repeating that line for a while now. Is my thought process so little?

Ah.......i look at the stars, ..beautiful.....too bad in my lifetime space travel will never come. Seriously you lucky bastards in the future, your gonna probably travel into the stars and the likes. Now im envious thinking about it.

Seriously, am i gonna sit on this bench till midnight? Sitting daze like a dumbass waiting for something to fall?

Whatever... im already wasted enough time coming here.

It's really simple why i am here...

I'm running away from all the troubles that reality gave me. Everyday my peers would tell me that i am wasting my time and that my parents will soon retire and there would be no way for them to support me or my education

Seriously, i am a dumbass., a massive idiot stuck on the past. It's not like i can't help it that sudden visions of my traumas during when i was nine would pop out every morning.

Heck, it's not even my fault that my parents won't let me get their consent for therapy again. I tried and tried but yet the answer of every therapist would always be ''time will heal the wound''. Yes it would heal, but will the scar disappear? Have they not think of it?

My parent even lectured me on how ''selfish'' and ''unmotivated'' i am. Of course i am! Because ! I am fucking brat, i know nothing about society, and im not even relatively close to stepping out of my safety bubble.

I know i am pathetic, but how do i become someone not? Life is noting like a linear story, because in a liner story there would always be a beginning, a middle and the end. But life ain't like that. There are so many routes and branches to take that its confusing.

And One route may take you to happiness or may take you to despair. But whichever story it may be it always end.

So how? How?

I may continue to ask for a long time, but where do i start?

Where should i go?

Should i travel down the memory lane? And recall everything?

I am tired of this dim lighted rooftop . Whatever, i guess that will do for today.

I have nothing else to do anyway.