=== Under the weather

Recently I have been seeing Jielby less and less. I wonder if she still is mad about that last time. I should try to apologise, but I feel really strange about it. It's more like she supposed to say sorry first! Until recently, we did a good job hunting so far. Hence, now something must have happened that changed her. I can't tell what though, not even from this diary. I did not burn it yet, not planning to either. Still, at the same time I'm not going to open it again. If she wants something from me, I'm going to wait.

That’s for the better of us all, I think. I tried many times to convince everyone, so there is not point forcing words out again. One day this weather will change, I hope, and we will return to the joy we got from following one dream, like that underwater...

[Hmm...What can I say, I have a bussy-wossy month so I couldn't do stuff I wanted. I mostly worked on that one project, right? You know what I'm talking about? But I won't force you to test it or anything. My sisters though, should I dare to ask them after...]

[Yea you really did step into deep GLB. I can't help you with your little pseudo-guild, but you keep up that magnificent job okay? One day you would be as cool as me, swimming in beautiful girls and on top of PvP rankings. "Dream on" is what kids say nowadays.]

[Oh my gee, your usual treatment huh? But I like you style nevertheless. Like a big playa, with all the honeys and monies. I envy you, your skill at the game mostly—your character is all over the place though. Absocuters is way to go, since flat is justice! Ishishi~]

[Hey, you never change out of your character, do you? It's like already integrated into you. I should feel sorry for you, little girl, but oh my, I don't seem to care at all. We are just friends, you know, I don't need to play in your cards, or to fix your tiny brain.]

Considering that the only other option for me to hunt was Corona, we decided that we go out and see how far we can go. As I expected, that wasn't the best of ideas, but at least we tried. We didn't have fun, or the resolve to go all night. When we end up talking much—it's always this problem or something. I wonder if it's my fault as well, that we can't get serious about grinding like we did before? If there’s a way make it right again, I don't know what I could change about myself or others. I’m simply out of ideas.

Eventually I got asked by her as well, do you want to become idol? Hey you did great with the other Mermaids and stuff. Well that time was fun, but I don’t really feel it any more. It was one-and-done deal—it wouldn’t work the second time.

[Everything is under control—it's just there is not one way to get the money, righto? Jeepers, you were right about that! Gloomily, I can't seem to talk normally any more. Oh wellie, it's not like I was able to change others either, like that Oddie who always...]

[I told you about this, but it was your choice. You really turned into a fine memer though—I can't deny that, right? Sorry, there is no cure for that either. You wanted that from the start, so now it’s too late to complain...or to grow up from it too I guess.]

[Ouchie-mowchie, you really are the best at your thing. I can't be lagging behind now. This pegasus plan was all about dreams, but I guess it ended up as a meme? There are far more affordable ways to have fun in this game, so I'm going to think less...]

[You can't, that's impossible for a short-sighted birdbrain like you. Next day you will see, you are going to be all up the sky again. That always happens so you should just accept it. But just ask me for money and...well forget it, it's not like you are good enough. PvP takes not only skill but talents, so there is no way such a two-left-hand is going to succeed there either. You're hopeless.]

Motivation is the last this I thought this team lacked. They are always so fired up to do stuff, especially Noctia during nights. She has little time to play so I understand she wants to get the most out of it. But sadly, others don't really follow her example. Maybe she is just good at the game? I mean the Priest archetype is usually the one that deals the least damage, but hers is fine.

I was also wondering about changing my weapon, to a more useful one, but I think now would be too late for that. Like it usually costs a lot to upgrade those things, so when you think about getting a higher rank, or switching it up, you have to pay even more...

[Too late to change classes you say? You could say that again, I'm so deeply molded-soiled into this character that I'm shocked. Do you know that we even won a contest once? I thought that was a new beginning, but it was over when we returned to the surface. Knowing that we did spend an entire day there, doing that amazing concert underwater, falling asleep with the other Mermaids even, that kind of feelings can’t be replayed or repeated. That’s why I guess they are feeling less and less about doing this grind stuff.]

[Ye, someone had to burst your bubble eventually. Getting your butt in dirt every day, going home to have some brief relief at night...that cycle just keeps on repeating again and again, huh? Like honestly, even I would get bored. You didn't really figure it all too well, huh?]

[Righto, you could say that again. I'm always the type that jumps head-first and then asks myself why did I do that? I tried making this thing, just to make everyone work less, but it don’t think I did a good job explaining. I just gave her the dairy, thinking that she would...It’s like bliss when you let go of troubles, your daily slog, and joy-ploy play around in the dirt. You can only appreciate things after you let go of them. Like when you have nothing, there are no troubles or worries. Yet I don’t know how to relate that concept to her.]

[That's why you ended up giving her your diary, the little picture book that you keep so dearly? You’re still at that age, huh? Perhaps your deal is kindergarten uniforms, considering you like playing in the sand with others children? They are your friends, they might deserve better than being just schoolmates, though I bet they all have squeaky voice like yours. How embarrassing.]

Right, if I can think of anything now, saying sorry would not be sufficient. I need to do something more than that. Possibly, if I talked her about that rodeo...and maybe convince others, she would turn back to her sunshine self? Um, sure, okay...Dammit! I can't do this! It's too much if I involve other sisters. How about instead of dungeons we do something dirty...

[Of course I treat them as cutie-fruitie friends, how else would I possibly make them happy? You can think this some kind of school setting, but it's not! You wouldn't understand Albert. I'm surrounded by cuters lolis, using a voice changer and being one myself. That the life, not some dead-end job pushing the waste cart. You can be all top of the world, but people like me will never succeed at...]

[At anything you say? Oh well, I am always being critical about towards you, downright trolling, just so you understand okay? No hard feelings, be whoever you want to be. But that alone won't change anything. You will still be just a little loli...]

[You know, duckie-maggie you Albert! I at least try to be funny, not antisocial like you. I might be not good at anything, forcing others to help me... I get reminded that a lot honestly. Yet, are you never afraid that you might say a word too much?]

[No, since I'm not even remotely attached to you, or this conversation. Do as you please. See if you can escape that mud pit alone.]

This rainy day at Maremoda, the city that usually finds a way to have fun above all else, was quite pleasant to my drenched head. Not only me but also others were feeling this gentle touch of droplets, happy as if they were some kind of plants. Quite frankly, I was looking for a place where I could get a garden-type item, but I feel lost. Where am I really? This narrow alley is quite...

[Did you get lost kid? Nothing to see here, as you can notice if your eyes aren't blind.]

[Oh really? Well you must be quite happy to see a soul, are you like a mugger or something?]

[I'm not, though I'm all about making little priggish children cry to their mother with razor sharp sarcasm.]

[What a mouth! You want to fight or something? I don't have the time for this, I’m investing in gardening.]

I found myself in front of a boy, which was still small considering that my height was already super tiny. That bully, leaning against a wall, clearly appeared as looking for trouble. With his black and showy outfit, he was giving me a piercing gaze. I was kinda worried, but not all that much. There is no way he would attack me in the middle of the town, with all the AI guards instantly reacting.

[Meh, I just wanted to say hello, maybe a little talk. You are one of the Wing Sisters, right?]

[Now you got me interested. You want to fight against the entire squad you prick? What nerve...]

[Wrong again. You look like a bum yourself, so I was wondering if you wanted some training. I'm going to ask just once.]

[Oh that, I don't need it, neither do others. You better leave us alone, okay?]

He was still insisting on offering us something, but I knew that this wasn't worth it. Suddenly, the rain started storming. Just behind my head there was a curtain of downpour, no turning back huh? His expression also started to look a bit clearer.

[Too bad, I was just feeling to help, that's the least I can do. People be like trying, doing strange things, mashing their head against a wall until they succeed. But in the end they remain alone, cut off from the world. People also be having some fun, so that others may smile too. Yet sometimes they might get misunderstood greatly. People also are generally not good at everything. Still, they do try. That's why in the end it's only the effort that counts, it can be related. You can be sure I know all about that, as the top PvP Rogue here.]

[Eh, what is this little talk about? I'm going to mute you since there is no way I'm going out there...]

[Huh? You ought to realise by now. Now you can’t say I didn't at least try okay? Don't worry about the weather or the stuff I said, sometimes it gets stormy like that, but eventually it clears up. Another day, another sky, kids say nowadays. I gotta go.]

[Be on your way mister...and don't think about coming back. He will come back anyway, right? Dammit!]