Chap 12: An everlasting pain, an unending storm

We had a nice stroll that ended in a small food stall. The owner obviously recognised our mugs but he jokingly promised not to tell the teachers. We had some ramens and are now making our back to my dorm. Akihiko, after a great deal of consideration, told me of his small adventure.

"A lot certainly happened" I commented with some feeling of guilt, I was probably playing card then. But still, all those information, I truly don't know how to deal with them "So now you are that Gas guy new contact?"

"Yep, not sure how I feel about that really" Akihiko showed me the phone, which used to be Kitamura's. Actually, I never forgot about our old physician, perhaps I am unaffected by the memory wipe? That guy would always joke about my height, treating me like a kid. Annoyed I was but his fruit candies were just too good. Kind of sad really, he is now a goner, forgotten.

"At least now I will have someone to call aside from my mom" I said jokingly.

"True" Answered Akihiko who seems to be thinking about something "Wouldn't Aoi also have a phone as well, she is from the city like you"

That… has slipped from my mind actually. He continued "Maybe I will ask for her number later"

"You do that" I said, reaching my arm up to pat his shoulder "Do you even know how to use this?" I asked, looking at my friend's new phone. It isn't a flip phone and the language is set to English which I don't understand, kind of ironic really.

"Gas did teach me quite thoroughly. He even showed me how to play the games in it, the one with the bouncy ball" Akihiko surfs through the menus like a pro.

"That seemed unnecessary" I said, scratching my head.

"I guess so, he did seem creepily enthusiastic about it… Actually that guy is quite talkative" I am thinking about that actually. For someone who is supposedly like a spy of sort, that Gas seemed to talk a lot. Maybe he was just glad to talk to someone isn't horribly hostile and racist.

But what about our old physician, I never found him to be backward like the people here… "Wait, you mentioned someone who seems to be an expert on apparition here. Who is that?" I asked, Gas must have had another contact.

"Forgot about that, here he is" Akihiko showed me the contact list on his phone. There are only two numbers, Gas-chan and… "Ishmael, he only contacted with Kitamura, never Gas directly. I tried to call him but no one picked up"

"There is another foreigner here?"

"No, apparently he is Japanese, native to this island even. I have no idea why he would use that name. Maybe a reference to the son of Abraham or that guy just read a lot of Moby Dick"

I have no idea about those but didn't ask anyway, Akihiko can get… carried away with explaining sometimes. As I am thinking, however, a remark comes out of nowhere.

"Wait, is Dorian here, he is awfully quiet"

Surprised, I stumbled for an answer "Eh… I wonder why, maybe he is just tired" It didn't seem to fly but Akihiko decides not to pursue that subject.

Nevertheless, the lie sours our conversation somewhat. We continue to make our way up the mountain in silence. That is, until we can both hear a short jingle, I draw out my phone to find it inert. It comes from Akihiko.

He looks at his phone with a sense of dread, this is the first time the thing has been used. After that Saturday, Gas hasn't contacted him at all, not until now.

"Hello?" Said Akihiko cautiously. A faint sound comes from the device, I forgot to tell him to turn on the speaker. It isn't long before the call is cut.

"So, what is it" I asked nervously.

"It's Gas, he said there is something… 'we' should see" So he knew I am here as well. I don't want to go, however. All these business, to me has now concluded, the rot is gone. I have had enough already.

"Guess we should go then" But then again, I can't just let Akihiko to go by himself… Or at least that is what I tell myself.

Still, my best friend seems to be really into this, now all of a sudden. Unlike me, it was a while until Akihiko could sense the rot and even then, his exposure was minimal. He was never as acute as me, nor was he that invested. It made me doubtful of his intention, why did this person decide to follow me.

In my eyes, Akihiko had everything I ever wanted. The look, the height, the build, the charisma, the charm and most of all, connections. He is respected, admired and loved. And yet a person like that decided to follow someone like me around. Was he bored, I wondered, of all that he had. Maybe I was something new? Was it a cheap thrill he seeks?

Could he ever sense the rot to begin with?

Over time, those doubt of mine dissipate, Akihiko was a best friend I could ever have. He would always listen to me, standing up to me. Even when others were concerned for him, hanging out with a gaijin (外人). He would still be there with me.

But now, seeing him so engrossed in this, so enthusiastic after everything is done. That tingling doubt returns to me. Ah, I shouldn't be like that…

We go pass the school even further up the hill. It isn't long before we hit a wall of rock. To the left, behind a discrete bush, however, is a hidden cave. Suddenly, I can smell it, that rotten smell of fetid flesh. For a moment, my mind is flooded with thoughts and questions, I couldn't breath as all of them overwhelm me.

Is it back? How did it return? Why did it have to come back? When did this happen? What will it do? What could I do? What should I do? Yuu…

I snap out of the trance, however, seeing Akihiko also turning pale. He could smell it too. We look at each other and nod, then make our way in, talk about a bad idea. The cave gets even more spacious inside and we soon stumble upon the source.

It is a rotting corpse wearing a white lab coat.

At least all the business with the rot has prepared me well since this only taken me aback not by much. Akihiko, however, is trying his best not to puke at the sight of our old physician, Kitamura.

In the corner is a man leaning on the wall with a thick duster "Nice to see you both" This must be Gas "We can skip the introduction; your friend must have told you all about yours truly here"

"Yes" While I am not that affected, this choice of scenery is still a thing of disgust "Is this all want to show us?"

"Not really. When I found him like this there was a notebook in his hands. A few final pages were ripped out, however" Gas handed me some papers "He had hidden them deep in his coat"

Taking the items, I have to wonder why he would do something like that. Perhaps he was being chased, so Kitamura decided to use the notebook as bait, so that the real information could be hidden. I was expecting a journal of sort, but no the first page is something familiar.

23/2/92

Everyone is gone now, only I remain. Soon, all of this will be forgotten, just like all the souls taken by this rotten monstrosity. It has prowled they hallways of this school for more than a decade, preying upon us all. Every year, dozens of unsuspecting students are consumed. For what, I don't know.

The most horrifying thing is not the senseless slaughter, however, it is that we all none the wiser. Everyone killed by this creature are simply forgotten. Records were rewritten, items thrown out, there was nothing left of the dead. Nothing but a final torrent, a congregation of tortured souls. Withering, screaming, rotting away. I can feel their confusion, their fear, their pain. They are mindless and so dangerous. Two of my friends were gone like that, dragged away by thousands of dead ones.

I can now no longer remember their name, those who I hold dear. I can't remember her name, one from the painting. She sacrificed herself to evil, to seal it away inside her own shell. Will it be eternal? Will the thing one day completely eaten her inside out? That I do now know, but I made a promise, to return for her.

What a fool I was, spewing such words of heroism. A vow that would soon slip away from my mind anyway

No, I will return somehow! Even if this mind of mine erodes away, I won't let you suffer for my sin. I promise no matter what, you will be free my friend.

-Helena

It was the final entry that Aoi found but translated. I can't help it but fixated on those words, 'one from the painting'. There is only one person I know who fit the bill, one who is no more. I try to focus but that's all my mind care to wander. This is no time to dwell on the past, to what has been done. I must move on, that was what I promise myself, what I willed.

"President" A hand suddenly patted at my shoulder. It's Akihiko, looking at me worryingly "Are you alright?" He said. There is such sincerity to his look that I manage to refocus. I remember now, why my skepticism about him was discarded. I have met many and he is one of the few who actually, truly care. Sorry for doubting you again like that.

"I'm fine" I reassured him and continue reading. The other papers are written by Kitamura himself.

I have finally found him, that rotten murderer, or more like a her. It's the girl in the old library, but at the same time not. When she kills, something seems to engulf her, something controlling. Her movement in an instant would change, her walking and posture resemble that of a man. If the translation is correct then this must be the one who sealed the murderer years ago. Then why has the killing continued, albeit not on the scale as before. Has that thing taken control of her finally? 'Eaten her inside out' per that journal? But then why would her face then would still look the same, cold but slightly mournful.

I couldn't observe anymore, it is too dangerous. It makes my stomach turns but I must once again sneak away and left my student to death. This time it is Aoi, that poor girl doesn't deserved this fate. I don't know how much longer I can keep on doing this. I follow this case to maybe finally avenging those who died but now the body just keep on pilling up more and more.

The final is written in a hurry, the paper all crumpled.

Years ago, some students managed to seal away the murderer. But it took almost all the apparitions along. According to Ishmael, only Hitobashira remained. However, that event also gave birth to Shoudan, a vengeful spirit. He wants to release and consume the murderer for spawning him. But for some reason, Shoudan can't touch the girl, the seal. Can't or won't I don't know. But he had found me out, he wanted me dead. But ironically I won't be around much longer anyway. The murderer knew I was there when at Aoi's murder, who survived somehow? I can smell that rotting presence, he is here in the corridor. I would lock myself in but O'Brien is here lying on the bed. I can't involve the boy.

That's where it ends, as sudden as how it started. There are lots more in the notebook held by Gas, but now me and Akihiko couldn't care less about it. Seeing that we just learnt the worst news possible.

"What's wrong?" Gas asked, noticing our behaviour.

"The girl in this note, the librarian… she is gone" Akihiko answered "But does that mean this Shoudan, whatever he is, will try to release the rot!"

"I can't let that happen" "I can't let that happen" He continued to mutter those words to himself. The news was horrible but it seems like my friend here takes it much worse. Before I can say anything he suddenly leaves in a hurry.

Worried, I grab his arm "Akihiko, what is going on? Are you alright?"

He turns around and I am certainly surprised by the person in front of me. The always healthy athlete is now all pale, his arm shaking slightly. His eyes open wide in an expression of dread. He looks more like an addict, a long-time wreck. As if all of his fatigue surface at once.

"I don't know" He muttered with his cracking dry lips "It's nothing"

"You look horrible, don't say it's nothing"

I am determined to get to the bottom of this phenomenon, but maybe the reason is much clearer than I have thought.

"Horrible? He just gotten a bit pale, that's all" Said Gas who is still leaning on the wall. Hearing such words while my friend is like this send a jolt of anger through me.

"Just a bit pale! He looks like he is dying here!"

My rage, however, is extinguished just as fast.

"He has been looking like that ever since you two arrived" Gas answered, intrigued by my mistake "Hey boy, these past three days, have you been sleeping properly?" He suddenly asked.

"Hm… not really" Akihiko didn't expect that out of nowhere but he answered anyway.

What is going on here? He was completely normal earlier? I step back in confusion before finally realizing why. My filter is still there, still active. Come to think of it, is my perception still affected, is the world still just a rotten mess. Closing my eyes, I try to concentrate but when I open them again, the everything is still the same.

I… can't seem to remove it, to see the world for what it actually it…

Turning around at Gas, I stare at the man whom I have never seen before. A metallic gas mask and a thick duster. Everything seems to fit Akihiko's description. And then there was Azumi whom I only saw after the filter was on. I could still see her… right? If the person I saw wasn't her, if the person in front of me here isn't Gas¸ then what is in front of me then and now. The thing I saw then and now are brand new. Then what…

Ah, I shouldn't be thinking about this right now, there are more pressing matters.

"Akihiko, you really look like a dump, what is… going on?" I said, feeling like a broken record.

Looking at me, he lets out a sigh "I should be the one asking that… But yeh, I haven't been feeling well lately, it's just…" Akihiko paused a bit, a pained expression flashes on his face "This thought has been plaguing me, that I have forgotten something, or somebody. They were important, dear to me and now I couldn't remember them at all. A piece of me, gone without my knowledge"

Clenching his fist, Akihiko looks up with determination "I won't let it happen, the rot can't roam again. I won't let something like that be awake!"

And with that, he bolt away, leaving me behind in contemplation. Isn't Shoudan going to kill the rot for good. That thought must have crossed Akihiko mind, but we don't know if that unknown apparition would succeed or not. If that is the case, it's best if it never tries in the first place.

Grinding my teeth, I decide to chase after my friend.

"Are you going to help him?" Gas asked.

"Yes"

I gave my answer and starting to make my way out of the cave. That is until I heard a familiar name coming from the man.

"What would Ms. Eileen think about this I wonder?"

All the alarm bells in my head ring loudly, in that moment, nothing else matter. I turn back in rage "Why did you mention her!"

"Woah, that's quite an intense expression you have there" Gas stood straight "Don't worry, I only read about her after going through the Grey, not the O'Brien, family tree. I won't touch your precious mother at all"

"Then why mentioning her in the first place" I asked again.

"Well, judging from your reaction, she is very dear to you. I hope the reverse is true" He continued in a taunting tone, apparent even through the mask.

"Just get to the point" I squinted my eyes as for a moment, Gas posture seemed to shift instantly.

"This kusa of yours is very dangerous, that I know for sure. What are you and your friend going to do. What if something bad happen to you, your mother would be very sad indeed" Halfway through his sentence, his tone instantly changed to one that sounds more concerning. The man didn't even seem to be aware of that, or maybe that never occurred "Is this island worth it to you. Just grab those you are fond of, convince them, drag them of this place. I will help you even. If there is one thing I know, you don't care squat about almost everyone here anyway"

I tried to deny his claim but words don't come out of my mouth. I staggered backward unconsciously "That's not true" I said mostly to myself "What would you know"

"I know you are a Grey and that is enough" Gas muttered in a grunted voice.

"No!" I have changed! It's true that I have! I tried my best! Right?

"Anyway, I am not here to argue with you. That was just a friendly advice" He said with a concealed hatred nearly muffled by the metallic mask. In hindsight, his attitude, his sudden offer to help were telltale. Gas must have some sort of history with my family. Nevertheless, the me now doesn't care.

I take my leave anyway, not saying a word. But then, it doesn't feel right to just leave. And so, I turn around one last time "Every time I tried to imagine me forgetting about mother, about all those who are important to me, I couldn't continue, couldn't breathe. It was horrible, suffocating and… even if those who may die are of no concern to me. They are still dear to him, to Akihiko and I don't want my best friend to go through that, maybe for the second time I don't really know!"

With those words, I can feel a sense of relieve, as if I have justified something, not only to Gas but me myself as well. And with that, I can leave with confidence.

"President, what are you doing here?" Akihiko seemed surprised to see me here, also in the old library with him.

"What make you think I wouldn't be here" I replied "A president should help out his member in distress after all. Besides, preventing an apparition from releasing an ages old evil sounds like a job for the Paranormal Activity club (unofficial)"

"Hah" Akihiko let out a slight laugh "I am in your care then"

"So you have any idea of what to do yet, my cadet" I asked.

Akihiko sighed "I figure we should at least know where the painting is. Then we could figure out a way to defend it against this Shoudan. But then I have no idea about where it could be"

"That… I actually know something about that"

On the way here, I had been thinking about it after all, the painting. Then I could feel this tingling feeling that I had buried away, the memory I didn't want to relive. I know… knew this painting after all and were… close. So I tried to delve into my mind, my own consciousness. And deep down there, I found the answer or at least I thought that was the answer. Oh well, only one way to.

I grab the chair behind the librarian desk and look forward. In front of me is a door, behind it is our clubroom but that is not my objective. No, I care about what above that door.

Gripping the metal chair tightly, I swing it upward while letting out a war cry on the top of my lungs. And my full power leave behind… a slight crack. That was embarrassing, guess that tip toeing isn't the best way to focus your strength.

"Are you sure about this?" Akihiko asked.

I give him a nod then hand over the chair with my head hanging low. With just a swing, a chunk of the wooden cover falls off revealing… a painting! Another hit follows up with a final one and then it all comes down, showing me something all too familiar.

It is the painting Aoi showed me last week, my own unfinished drawing. Of course, this piece is completed. So that mean what I have thought to be my own painting, my own effort, turns out to be just a replica after all…

Guess that's all I am good at.

As I reach out my hand to touch the canvas I am dragged down violently by Akihiko.

"Watch out" He screamed out as a gust of flame flew above our head.

Hitting my head on the ground, my vision is just a blur. But even then, I can still see the old library going up in flame. The fire is spreading, to the painting on the wall. I reach up and to grab the ornate frame, a big mistake.

My fingers touch the scorching metal, I can smell burning flesh.

It hurt, I scream internally. The pain is unbearable but I still hold on, trying to yank the painting of the wall to no avail. Soon it starts to catch fire and I can do nothing but watch her being swallowed whole, turning into ash.

No, I could still do it. I yell out in determination as my hands are engulfed by the scorching flame.

Suddenly, I am dragged away by an invisible force. It isn't Akihiko, who is looking on in horror. There is only one.

"Let me go, Dorian! I can do this! I can save her" I tried to free myself from his influence "Let me go"

My friend soon snaps back to reality and also try to hold me back. I struggle, I kick and bite but couldn't escape his grasp. With just a swing, Akihiko throws me on my back.

"Arghhhh" I let out a pained groan as my glasses crack and shatter. The pieces fall of but one still manages to dig into my face. Blood stream out of me and so are tears, but not because of the wound.

These past few days, it was difficult to cope with what happened. I couldn't eat, I couldn't talk. Every time I closed my eyes, her image flashed in front of me. She haunted me in my sleep, in the waking world. And the pain, it was excruciating and constant, as if my heart is pierced by a thousand needles. My body trembled and shriveled with every passing hours.

But I have promised myself, to move on no matter what, to continue struggling. And so I tried to cast everything away, to seal her in the back of my mind. To avert my mind.

And to a degree, it succeeded. Aside from a constant dull pain, I was fine, I could move on.

But this day, to see her again so vividly only to have it snatched away from me like that. It hit my deepest self. It broke the dam and now I am drowned in the flood of memories.

She is gone, my Yuuko is gone.

Opening my eyes, I find my hands now burnt black from the fire. It doesn't hurt though, I couldn't feel anything. Looking up, I could see him, the person who must have followed us.

Standing tall, he dons a rather normal setup, a shirt and a pair of trousers. His clothes are in tatter but everything is covered with bandage all over, including his eyes. Fire gust out from beneath all the covering however as he approaches us both. It is the apparition Shoudan.

All the bookshelves are covered in flame and yet they don't seem damaged. Even the books are all fine under the heat. But this inferno is still true, my hands are still charred.

The apparition raises his arm and soon I can see scorch. Akihiko jumps toward to shield me but there is no need for that.

Shoudan is suddenly brought to his knees, the cause is a machete lodged behind his head. Before he can stood back up again Gas jumps in and grab the handle, draws out the blade and delivers a devastating slash at the apparition throat. Shoudan staggered backward, flame gushing out of his outstretched arm. The fire, however, couldn't damage the hardened duster. Another slash and his head falls back, held only by a strip of flesh left.

But even then, Shoudan still lives. With a screeching scream, he seemingly detonates himself. Me and Akihiko manage to hide behind the librarian desk. Gas vault over to us just in time to avoid the explosion.

"Nice to see you two here" He said nonchalantly, wiping the blood of his gleaming machete.

Akihiko is surprised alright "What are you doing here!"

"Helping you out, of course" Gas answered "But we are in kind of a pickle here" The man holds onto some sort of handle peeking out of his duster.

"What is that?" Asked Akihiko again while I remained quiet, too consumed to realize what is going on or what to do.

"This?" The man said with bated excitement, as if he has been wanting to hear that question.

He stands up and takes out a double-barreled gun. Pausing for effect, he says cockily.

"This is my boomstick!"

A thunderous sound filled the library as both barrels unload dozens of pellets into the furious apparition, sending him flying onto his back. Quickly loading another two rounds, Gas fires before Shoudan could detonate himself again. The blast rips his arm straight off, blood gushes out the open wood. The apparition tries to reach for his dismembered limb but two other rounds are ready to discharge. There goes a leg.

"I have enough slug rounds to do this all day" Gas loads another pair.

What was once a dangerous supernatural threat is now reduced to a mess. He crawls along the ground pathetically, trying to escape the next shotgun blast. Oh how things change.

Looking at him, one can be forgiven for showing some sort of sympathy. Blood still streams out Shoudan gaping wounds, he can be heard crying out for help. But then his voice is reduced to gargles as his mouth is filled with blood, dripping through the bandage. Meanwhile, Gas is walking toward him through the fire, his black mask gleams ominously. Even through the burning sound, I could somehow hear his muffled breathing. I have never realized how unnatural that sounds before.

But even after all that, I can feel no sympathy toward the apparition. Looking back at the painting covered with ashes, what is burning inside me is an uncontrollable rage.

"Stop" Yelled Akihiko "He has enough already" He can't bear seeing someone suffering like this, even if that person just tried to kill us all.

Such a kind person this friend of mine, he is certainly dear to me but I can't entertain that notion. I want to see pain, I want to see blood, I want to see suffering. And so, I scream out at the top of my lungs, with an intensity I have never reached before.

"KILL HIM!"

Before Gas can pull the trigger, however, there is a sudden tremor. I look back to see hands, of various size and shape. Rotten hands reaching out of the scorched painting.

Then they all flood out, countless stream out knocking us of our feet. Ah, this smell of fetid flesh, this festering sensation, it's the rot I have come to know so well. I can feel myself rotting away, my senses overwhelmed. Even my filter can't save me now. Next to me Akihiko is also withering away, his body decaying.

Before we both succumb completely to this torrent of lost souls, I can feel myself being dragged away. It's Gas, he lifts Akihiko back to his feet.

"RUN!" He screamed into our face. His voice, revolting due to the rot, still clear our mind enough to move.

We run outside of the library to be met with the most depressing of sight. The rot somehow couldn't exit the school perimeter no matter how hard its try. Myriad of souls scream out in pain, they burst out but are held back by an unknown force. With another disgusting screech, the rot starts to swirl, they orbit the school. And as more and more of them streaming out of the painting, the place is soon surrounded by a storm of rotten souls.

"It's closing down upon us" Warned Gas.

We have to scramble lest we be swallowed whole. But before we could make our way into the school building, Akihiko suddenly clutches his head in pain "What is going on!" He groaned in pain "No, that's not true, how"

I run back to his side but he just pushes me away. My friends mutter to himself "No, I have no brother, what is going on!"

"Snap out of it" I yelled at him but it was already too late.

"Ah" Akihito turned back at the storm and reached out "Mother, brother…"

Gas drags me back as I can do nothing but watch helplessly as my friend slowly walk toward the torrent. As I am forced inside the building I can see him being consumed by the encroaching storm.