We’re… in Harus… from World Gate Online… but, that was in the comic book of… Worlds’ Gatekeeper! What the hell is happening!?

“Sir… where are we?” (Alex)

Alex asked me, politely.

“We’re in… Harus… what the fuck!?” (Mason)

Mason said, talking to himself.

“What’s Harus?” (Ren)

Ren asked Mason, curious.

“It’s… a world… in a fiction called Worlds’ Gatekeeper, but… W.G, is a… re-write of World Gate Online… created by… fuck, what’s their name? Whatever… in short, this world… is from a book, that was turned into a TV series, then into a successful series of movies… then, into a video game…” (Mason)

Mason… ranted?

“So… is there any information on this place?” (Ratel)

Ratel asked Mason.

“Most of it is unknown… we know that there are Goblins, Orcs (Green, humanoid… not so rapey kind), Dragons… and, that’s all I remember” (Mason)

Mason listed off all of the monsters he could remember… which amounted to… a whopping, three.

…

…

…

What the fuck is that thing!?

“JESUS CHRIST!!” (Vincent)

I shouted as I saw a one-eyed giant looking down on us… oh fuck, it’s a cyclops!!!

“RUN!!!” (Mason)

Mason shouted as he shot a couple fireballs at it… it did sufficient damage, not too little… but not enough!

“LOOK OUT, SIR!!!” (Alex)

Alex shouted at me, and pushed me out of the way, as I was about to be crushed under the cyclops’ giant foot.

“THAT’S FOUR THINGS, GOBLINS, ORCS, DRAGONS AND FUCKING CYCLOPS’!!!” (Vincent)

I yelled… excitedly, as I pulled out Excalibur and Durandal, and sliced the Cyclops’ left foot off, causing it to fall… towards me and the others.

“MOVE TO THE RIGHT!!!” (Vincent)

I shouted as I teleported myself, Ren and Ratel away from the falling Cyclops.

...They were closer to me, not my fault!

…

…

…

The Cyclops’ head hit a rock… and it died… instantly.

“Pfft…hahahaha!!!” (Ratel)

Ratel… laughed his arse off at that…

“Hahahaha!” (Everyone)

Then we all began laughing… until we heard the growling in the distance… along with loud roars… and is that fire!!??

“Come with me!” (???)

Some guy just… teleported in front of us… he’s wearing a skull mask, has a scythe. A trenchcoat, and two katana to the side… he looks like Reaper from Overwatch… without the guns. We stupidly followed him.

“Where are we going? Who are you and what the fuck was that fire!?” (Mason)

Mason, stopped being… tough and went back to default mode.

“Question one, the answer is… wherever the hell I feel like! Two, just call me Grim! And three! That was a fucking Rank SS dragon, and thank your sorry stars that I was here to save you from those monsters that smelt the Cyclops’ blood! Or you fucking idiots would’ve been swarmed within the minute!” (Grim)

He said as we walked through the woods quietly… also, we’re in the woods.

----------

It took… around half an hour… and one exhausted Mason, and we finally made it… to a tree… with a door in it… interesting…

“So, where the fuck are we?” (Vincent)

I asked “politely”.

“We’re in the world tree, Yggdrasil, I may have carved a hole into it, no reason why… just did…” (Grim)

Grim said… awkwardly.

“Wait… so, you’re telling me… that… that treehouse is actually the legendary world tree Yggdrasil!?” (Mason)

Mason “asked” angrily.

“Yes.” (Grim)

And Grim… answered proudly…

“WHAT THE FUCKING HELL IS WRONG YOU!!!???” (Mason)

Mason yelled, and lunged toward Grim… but Ratel and I grabbed him… just in time.

“Nothing’s wrong with me, but you… you probably have some issues…” (Grim)

Grim said, stepping back slightly.

“Sorry about Mason… I don’t know what got into him…” (Vincent)

I said, still holding onto Mason with all of my strength, while he was swearing crazily.

“YOU MOTHERFUCKING PIECE OF SHIT, JUST WAIT!!! WHEN THEY LET GO OF ME, I’M GONNA RIP YOUR THROAT OUT AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR FUCKING ARSE!!! YOU HEAR ME, MOTHERFUCKER!!?? YOU BETTER GET READY TO TALK OUT OF YOUR OWN MOTHERFUCKING ARSE!!! BITCH!!!” (Mason)

He used… a lot more words that necessary…

…

…

…

“YOU MOTHERFU-” (Mason)

Ratel… knocked him out.

“It’s for his own good… and for my ears, he was getting kind of loud…” (Ratel)

He said, seriously.

“So… I welcome you to my humble abode~” (Grim)

Grim said, opening the… door to Yggdrasil… and we heard Mason silently… moaning… talking about whips and stuff… creepy stuff, I’m just gonna repress that memory! Forever!

“It’s a… lovely… place” (Vincent)

IT’S NOT LOVELY, IT’S THE OPPOSITE OF LOVELY, RUN!!!

Ahem…

His house… was filled with blood and dead animal bodies… gonna repress this one too!

“Wow! So cool! Is that a horned wolf!? Oh my god!!! Is that a Werebear!!!???” (Ren)

Ren was… Ren… but weirder… she was running around, poking all of the dead animal corpses… and naming them… there were… three werebears, seven horned wolves, twelve sabertooths and one… squidman… gotta admit, squidmen are creepy, they look like men… with squid-like heads.

…

I just ignored (Repressed!!!) all of those dead animals… and sat with Grim… he has a lovely table…

Very lovely… I’m taking it.

“[Inventory]” (Vincent)

Aaaand, it’s gone.

“MY TABLE!!!” (Grim)

Grim, who had his elbows on the table, instantly fell over. Then he realized something. His table was missing!

“Pfft… hahaha! Sorry [Inventory]” (Vincent)

I took the table out, and… placed it… where it was… close to.

“How… how did you do that!?” (Grim)

Grim asked me, in amazement.

“Well, my power allows me to get… well any skill, so I got Inventory, I can store anything I want, with one restriction, it can’t be alive” (Vincent)

I said proudly.

“That’s… interesting, so… what’s your… power?” (Grim)

Grim asked me...

“Unlimited wishes” (Vincent)

As I said that, I hear the collective sound of four facepalms across the room… and a lot more from… another area that I do not know of.

(A/N: HE’S CATCHING ON!!! THE FOURTH WALL’S CRACKING!!!)

“Unlimited… wishes… wait! Doesn’t that mean… that you could solve all of the world's problems!?” (Grim)

Grim asked, astonished.

“I could, but it’s not my… homeworld… so… not my problem and I’m not doing it for my homeworld either, those cunts deserve what’s coming to them!” (Vincent)

I said, cheerfully.

“Okay… why do they deserve it?” (Grim)

Grim questioned.

“Let’s see… Terrorism, global warming, destroying the environment, racism, murder, rape, pedophilia, necrophilia, once again RAPE… that’s just about the basics” (Vincent)

I said… somberly.

“Oh… the fuck is global warming?” (Grim)

He asked.

“Basically fucking up the planet and making us unable to breathe properly… so, bad for everything… and why do we have it? So we can charge our fucking H-pods and our Hacbooks!” (Vincent)

I said, angrily as I punched the table.

“Oh… the hell’s a-” (Grim)

I cut Grim off, saying:

“Don’t… I don’t want to answer anymore obvious questions… for us” (Vincent)

As I said that, I walked away.

“I’m gonna grab a drink… where’s the… drink thing?” (Vincent)

I asked.

“The well’s outside, and there’s a mug next to you… you figure it out!” (Grim)

Grim said, happily.

“Fine…” (Vincent)

I said, as I grabbed a mug and walked outside, only to see a… cube?

“Okay, how the fuck do I do this?” (Vincent)

I said to myself as I first, placed the mug on top of the cube…

That did absolutely nothing.

“Hmm… FILL WITH WATER!!!” (Vincent)

…

Also nothing.

“Oh fuck it! I wish this mug was filled with wa… wine” (Vincent)

I said, happily as I walked back inside with a mug of wine.

“Thanks for the drink!” (Vincent)

I said proudly.

“Okay, what’d you do? There isn’t even a well outside!!!” (Grim)

Grim shouted at me.

“Actually… there was, around… a mile away, I just teleported to the nearest well and back” (Vincent)

Grim walked up to me… and saw the wine in my mug, so he said:

“Is that wine!?” (Grim)

“No… Yes… Maybe!” (Vincent)

I said, quickly.

“Is it?” (Grim)

Grim just got scary!

“Yeah, I got frustrated and wished for some wine” (Vincent)

I said, slightly annoyed.

“You… genius! Wish me some!” (Grim)

Grim said, happily.

“Sure, I wish for another mug and wine inside of the mug!” (Vincent)

I wished, got a slight headache… luckily the pain lessens the smaller the wish is, and I got a mug of wine.

“Thanks!” (Grim)

Grim said as I handed him the mug of wine.

“I wish the wine I gave to Grim turned into cockroaches…” (Vincent)

As I said that, Grim spit out his… cockroaches.

“Pfffft!!!” (Grim)

“Hahahahaha!!!” (Vincent)

I fell to the ground, laughing my arse off.

“Hahahahaha” (Everyone)

So did everyone else… except for Grim, who was still spitting out cockroaches…

…

…

…

He’s finally finished.

He walks up to me and says:

“WHAT THE FUCK MAN, DO YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY!? FUCK YOU!!! GET OUT, NOW!!!” (Grim)

Grim shouted, angrily.

“I wish that you would just calm down… oh shit! FUCK!!!” (Vincent)

As I said that… I noticed what I just said, and started getting a migraine.

“Okay, I’m calm… gotta admit, that was kinda funny!” (Grim)

Grim said as he laughed… then punched me in the face!

“Ow!” (Vincent)

“But, it wasn’t funny enough!” (Grim)

Then, he kicked me…

“GET OFF OF HIM!!!” (Ren)

Ren shouted as she tackled him…

“GET OFF!!!” (Ratel)

Then, Ratel did…

…

Then Alex and Mason…

Then finally, I tackled him.

“Ow… okay, I’m sorry… can you guys… get off of me… you’re kind of heavy” (Grim)

*SLAP*

Ren slapped him.

“ARE YOU CALLING ME FAT!!??” (Ren)

Ren shouted.

“What no!” (Grim)

*SLAP*

Ratel slapped him too…

“So, I’M FAT!!??” (Ratel)

…

“THERE’S NO FUCKING WINNING WITH YOU PEOPLE!!!” (Grim)

He shouted as he ran off.

“Guys, stop!” (Vincent)

I commanded. And they stopped… instantly.

“Yes my king” (Ratel)

Ratel bowed down…

“Yes m’lord” (Ren)

Ren also bowed… then the rest bowed too.

“Why are you acting like stereotypical teenage girls?!” (Vincent)

I asked, slightly surprised.

“HE CALLED ME FAT!!!” (Ratel)

Ratel shouted, anger evident in his voice.

“Why the fuck do you care!?” (Vincent)

I shouted back.

“I… I… the fuck happened!?” (Ratel)

Ratel asked, confused.

“I… don’t know…” (Ren)

Ren also asked, confused.

…

Wait, were they under hypnotism!?

“Yes, they were… sorry, but I wanted to see the “true” you… and your friends, surprisingly the other two aren’t that different… and you’re more of a prankster” (Grim)

Grim suddenly said as he walked back into Yggdrasil.

“So… you hypnotized us!?” (Vincent)

I asked, angrily.

“It was merely for our protection” (Grim)

Grim said, in a proud tone.

“Our? Who else is with you?” (Vincent)

I asked.

“Well… fuck it, guys come on out!” (Grim)

Grim said, as he took off his mask, and… hundreds of elves walked in.

“I’m sorry for not telling you, but my real name is Grenov, I’m the leader of the high elves, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” (Grenov)

He said, smiling…

I will admit, he’s a beautiful man… long blonde hair, piercing green eyes… and very pointy looking ears… I’m not the best at descriptions.

“So, you have an entire… clan of elves at your disposal? Why didn’t you just say so!? I for one, love elves!” (Mason)

Mason said, smiling… as he walked up to a busty elf girl… and groped her.

*SLAP*

He deserved it.

“PERVERT!!!” (Busty elf girl)

She slapped him, causing him to fall to the ground...

“Hehehehehe” (Mason)

But, it was ineffective… since he’s a masochist.

“What’s wrong with this one!?” (Grenov)

Grenov asked me, seriously.

“He’s a perverted masochist… the only reason we keep him around is, because of his intelligence and… magic” (Vincent)

I emotionlessly said.

“Wait! So you don’t keep me around to torture!? Not fair!!!” (Mason)

Mason said, suddenly…

…

…

…

Repressing that too!

“Anyways… why don’t we calm down… and can you have your people… sheath their swords?” (Vincent)

I said politely, noticing a few of the elves with their swords unsheathed.

“Huh? Oh, sorry… sheath your weapons, maggots!!!” (Grenov)

…

He’s scary!

“SIR YES SIR!!!” (Elven soldiers)

They shouted, fear evident in their voices.

They sheathed their swords.

“Good, now… let’s negotiate!” (Vincent)

I said, suddenly.

“Negotiate, why exactly should we negotiate?” (Grenov)

Grenov asked, not expecting me to want to negotiate… for no reason.

“Well, if you allow us to live here for a while, maybe get to know your people… we could give you some weapons, called guns and tanks… they’re extremely powerful!” (Vincent)

I said, smiling.

“More powerful than magic? I think not!” (Grenov)

He said, slightly sneering.

“Well, I come from a place without magic, and only humans were there… so, naturally, we fought… and made weapons, then in retaliation to those weapons, others made armor, and to pierce that armor, more weapons were made… and, now we’re in an endless cycle of armor and weapons…” (Vincent)

I said, still smiling.

“So… no magic, how are you still alive? You should have died as a baby… okay, you have my interest… and, only humans? My god… that must have been horrible…” (Grenov)

He said, pity evident in his voice.

“It… yeah, it was… people discriminate others based on the color of their skin, and their religions… it’s horrible… so, back to negotiations, we’ll give you… a tank and three hundred AK-47’s in exchange for a years stay here, is that a deal?” (Vincent)

I asked, extending my hand.

“I don’t know… how am I to know that these weapons are even good?” (Grenov)

Grenov asked me, he’s suspicious...

“Here, I’ll show you how good these are… I wish for an AK-47 and any random tank... along with some knowledge on how to use them...” (Vincent)

I said the last part silently.

And, the bright light came back, worse than before.

“FUUUUCK!!!” (Vincent)

After… around three minutes of me screaming, an AK-47 and a tank appeared in front of me… luckily they stood back when they saw me screaming.

…

“Identify” (Vincent)

I said, silently.

T18

Rank: D

This tank was used in the second world war on the planet earth, it’s considered a classic, it may be quite unreliable without proper maintenance.

The tank was, a T18… shit, it was used in world war 2… cool, it had a machine gun on the front of it… and, was quite… fuck it, I’m not good at describing things…

And, then there’s the Ak-47… I actually want to know what the rank is on this thing…

“Identify” (Vincent)

AK-47

Rank: F

This automatic rifle is quite easy to make… compared to others, and is mainly used by poor countries as their main weapon.

Oh… cool…

…

Back to the others…

“What is that giant hunk of metal!?” (Grenov)

Grenov asked, astonished.

“That’s a T18 tank… pretty reliable, and this is an AK-47… now, do you agree? Or do you want to see how they work?... Who am I kidding, you totally want to see how they work!” (Vincent)

I said, excitedly as I literally teleported myself and the tank outside.

“Now, hop in… okay… use that… press that… okay, gonna be honest I don’t really know what I’m doing…” (Vincent)

I said, embarrassed.

“Leave it to me!” (Mason)

Mason angrily said as he went into the T18 and… instantly got it working, he made it move and shoot… causing it to destroy a few trees… and a cyclops…

“That’s amazing! Can the other weapon do that?!” (Grenov)

Grenov cheerfully asked.

“No… well… on a rather smaller scale…” (Vincent)

I said, happily.

“So, do we have a deal?” (Vincent)

I asked as I extended my hand.

And, he shook it, saying:

“Mr. Vincent, we have a deal” (Grenov)

After we shook hands, I heard a sudden and loud:

“ROOOOAR!!!” (???)

-------------------

The End XD