《Cleaning Up After the Heroes》Chapter 2: Some Good Fortuna
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It didn’t take long for Trakban to gather his things. All he had was a backpack that was about as tall as me, a couple extra sets of clothing, a single magical tome, and a journal. Heck, the guy didn’t even have any cookware or food. When I asked how he had managed to get by during his initial travels out this way, he just shrugged and said he got lucky with what he was able to hunt. Admittedly this was a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, he’s a minotaur. As in, half man, half bull. So I thought for sure he’d be a vegetarian, but as it turns out, no, he definitely takes more after the man part of that combination in that regard.
At least he wasn’t picky. That would have made the journey much more difficult. And we were already sitting pretty well in terms of difficulty in travel.
I say sitting, but the truth is, we did a lot of walking around that first day, ship to ship, dock to dock, just hoping to find a ship going in the direction of Plauros. And do you want to know what we were able to come up with?
Nothing.
“Plauros? Ain’t nobody brave enough to go to Plauros!” one said.
“Not enough cash, stranger!” said another.
“Ye’d have an easier time getting passage to the Demon King’s castle itself!” said one more.
There were also a few who refused passage when they realized they’d be carrying a minotaur, stating that there’s no way they would have carried enough food to make the trip. Which I found highly suspect, but unfortunately you get some people like that. It was maybe two ships out of the fifteen or so we tried to book that morning before we gave up and tried to find something to eat, opting to go to Khiet’s instead of Guawk’s. Not because I’m petty or anything, I just prefer her cooking!
At any rate, my embarrassment and shame at going back to Khiet’s empty-handed was nothing compared to going back to Guawk’s after poaching his best employee. At the time I wouldn’t have been surprised to find out he’d given me a lifetime ban from his tavern (which, I mean, he had, though that was rescinded later after my journey with the Heroes, but I already didn’t feel like bothering).
As I entered into Khiet’s tavern, welcomed by the clean, warm scents and sights, I already felt like I’d come home from a long journey, and while we drew some attention from the tavern guests, once they recognized me, they decided it best not to worry about the minotaur following me around. I slid up to the bar and tried to climb onto the stool as gracefully as my small frame would allow and waved at Khiet, trying to feign as much confidence as I could.
Alas, she saw right through me.
“Ilala!” she greeted me in that sing-songy voice of hers. “Back so soon? The Heroes can’t have completed their quest that quickly. What happened?”
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Crap! I was never able to lie to Khiet! “I…got…a little beat up,” I stammered. “The Heroes saved me from a bunch of goblins.”
“Goblins? What happened? Did they ambush ya? Did they steal anything? Did they hurt ya? I’ll kill ‘em all!” she said, showing a side of herself I had never seen before, and I prayed I’d never have to see it again.
“No!” I exclaimed, holding my hands up. “I promise, it wasn’t that bad, I’m fine! But the heroes got a bit of a head start on me so I’m trying to figure out what to do next.”
“What do you mean?” Khiet said, her expression softening, whatever rage she’d flown into subsiding.
“They’ve already left for Plauros,” I replied, sulking a bit. “We’ve spent all morning trying to book passage on a ship heading that way and nobody’s biting. I’ve heard every excuse, too dangerous, too expensive, not wanting to bother with my companion here.” After I said that, Trakban awkwardly waved.
“Yes, been meaning to ask about that,” Khiet said. “Friend of yours?”
“As of a couple hours ago, yes,” Trakban replied. “My name is Trakban. I am a minotaur from the Plauros region. I had traveled here to learn magic from Esther, but unfortunately that plan was not to be. However, if the Heroes mean to defeat the vampire who rules over Plauros, perhaps returning home to assist in the rebuilding efforts would be worth my while.”
Khiet nodded, then leaned to me to whisper something. “Your new friend’s a wordy fellow for…well y’know,”
I grinned uneasily. “Yeah, he’s aware of that.” I tried to change the subject. “Look, can we get some food, as well as some suggestions as to what to do next?”
“Ah, right, ‘course.” She waved a hand to her cook for some stew and bread. “So nobody here in town wants to go to Plauros. You might try shippin’ out from Kokiraki a little ways northeast o’ here. The government finally finished fixin’ that bridge across the river up north to help the Heroes, even though they were able to secure passage outta here anyway. It’d be a shame to let that go to waste.
My face must have lit up in excitement, because Kheit continued, “I mean, not to tell ya what to do or anything, but who knows who ya might meet comin’ out of Kokiraki. Though I did hear somethin’ about pirates up in that area, so ya might wanna be careful.
“Pirates?” I asked, my interest piqued.
“You haven’t heard? A crew of pirates set up shop in Kokiraki some time ago. Things are workin’ about the same as they always have, it’s just made trade up that way a bit more expensive. ‘Course this was all before the bridge was repaired. I reckon the king thought the Heroes would head up that way and give those pirates what’s comin’ to them, but I guess he forgot the Heroes were Heroes for all, not just our wonderful little kingdom.”
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“What do you mean?” I asked.
“What, you think saving some random kingdom’s princess from some noble in the middle of a tantrum was in the job description? Goodness no, one of the kingdom’s advisors refused to give them the map to the Gems until they saved the girl on their own.” Khiet chuckled. “Sometimes it’s hard to believe just how incompetent the king and his court can be. The city guards spend more time greetin’ visitors to the city than they do actually guardin’ the city!”
“Is that why they haven’t done anything about the pirates?” Trakban asked. “I mean, surely the king’s army could spare some troops to take care of a crew of pirates.”
An idea started to form in my mind. “Maybe, but what if we were to just…’borrow’ one of their ships? You’ve been out on the sea before, right?”
Trakban and Khiet both glared at me. “Are you out of your mind, Ilala?” Trakban asked incredulously. “Just how do you intend to ‘borrow’ a ship from pirates? What makes you believe they would just let you sail away with their ship?”
“Oh relax, we’ll have plenty of time to discuss a plan on the way there!” Surely speaking confidently would cover for the fact that I honestly had no idea how I was going to pull this off.
Trakban opened his mouth, likely to voice how insane my plan sounded (rightfully so) but Khiet spoke first. “You know, I reckon I know someone who might know a thing or two about thievin’.”
“Oh, that probably won’t be necessary,” Trakban blurted out. “I am certain we can find another solution to the problem without dealing with pirates.”
“No no, I insist. She owes me a lot of money anyway so she can just bring back a cut of whatever you manage to steal from the pirates,” Khiet insisted.
“Are you sure about this?” I asked, more than a little surprised that one of my dad’s friends was indulging my impulsive behavior. “I mean, I honestly hadn’t thought before suggesting we could steal the ship.”
“Trust me, she’s really good at her job. Too good. She needs an outlet, and she’s here right now. She actually made that stew you ordered.” She turned back to the kitchen. “Fortuna, get out here! I have some friends to introduce you to!”
From the kitchen emerged a young, slim, unassuming young woman, teens to early twenties maybe, with short, dark hair and extremely fair skin, looking as tired, bored, and irritated as I’ve seen a person. She said, “What, Khiet? I already told you the bread’s not ready yet.”
“Relax about the bread for a bit, ‘Tuna—”
“And I already said not to call me ‘Tuna’!” the woman snapped.
“Anyway,” Khiet continued, ignoring the outburst, “this young’un is Ilala, a friend of mine, and she could use yer thievin’ skills.”
“How much is she payin’?” the girl asked, uninterested. “Better than you?”
“Tell ya what,” Khiet said. “You go with this friend of mine, consider your debt settled. I just want a cut of whatever you end up stealin’.”
“Wait, don’t I get a say in this?” the girl protested.
“Certainly! You could always keep workin’ in my kitchen until you’ve paid me off the long way!” Khiet responded coolly.
She paused to think for a moment, then said, “What are we stealing?”
I quickly detailed my thoughts, before trailing off as I still wasn’t sure how Fortuna’s skills would even fit into the plan.
“Let’s back up a bit,” I finally said, unsure of where to take the conversation. “Who is Fortuna, and why does she owe you money?”
“Oh, this little scamp stole a lot of money out of my safe a few weeks back. I’m still not sure how she did it. Just managed to find my safe and pop it open.” Khiet chuckled proudly.
“And I got caught because I didn’t realize someone had seen me,” Fortuna said defensively, folding her arms.
“And someone saw you because you were somehow impersonating me!” Khiet looked back at me. “Still haven’t managed to suss out how she did it because it even fooled some of the regulars.”
“Trade secret,” Fortuna muttered. “You wouldn’t believe me even if I told you.”
So she was a master thief. This was something I could definitely make use of, but Fortuna definitely didn’t seem very willing to help. I wasn’t exactly impressed with her personality either.
“Do you do anything else?” I asked Fortuna, unsure of how to continue the conversation. “I mean obviously you cook, but can you fight? Navigate the wilderness? Sail a ship?”
Fortuna narrowed her eyes. “Do you?”
I paused, mouth hanging open for a while before finally saying, “No, unfortunately I don’t, sorry.”
“So you were going to steal a ship you don’t even know how to sail?!” Fortuna demanded. And the worst part was I honestly wasn’t sure how to respond. I mean, how do you even begin to respond to that besides saying something like, “I was going to figure it out along the way”? I mean…
“I was going to figure it out along the way!” I finally said, shrugging. “Maybe hire someone, bribe one of the pirates, I dunno. I just got the idea a few minutes ago.”
Khiet smirked (well, as much of a smirk as you can do with a beak). “Surely you can provide her with some input on the way there, Fortuna. It’s a couple days up to Kokiraki. You’ll have plenty of time to chat.”
Fortuna finally paused to think for a short while before saying, “And if I refuse I’m stuck in your kitchen?”
“Until you pay off the rest of your debt,” Khiet responded, nodding.
Fortuna’s eyes narrowed. “Fine. Nice to meet you, Ilala,” she said, extending a hand.
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