Back to me. That’s right, give your attention to this whore right here.

I’ve also bought myself a some new accessories upon arriving to the slums. You know? That poor child was just starving. I took a liking to the pins she wore and bought them for more than the price it should be. Two black bobby pins for my black-ish brown hair.

My current goal is to remove this bracelet off my wrist. With it, I was told I am forbidden to leave this city. I heard these from a group of strong looking kind man who offered me a makeover. Sadly I wasn’t ready to change my already ugly face and am now running from them. This will see if I am valuable to my stalker assigned to follow me on behalf of the king’s orders.

“Get back here you shit!” One man called.

“I’m flatter but that’s ironic seeing how you actually had horse shit in your mouth!”

I have a reason to start running. I can try to shake off the stalker as well as my pursuer. How did this happen? Simple. I scouted for the most notorious man-, and that’s by finding a group tearing down someone else’s stall and threatening the owner. With straps of torn cloth, probably someone’s laundry, I scraped dung off the ground and slapped it on the leader’s face. I proceeded to laugh and insult him until he became this rampaging bull he is.

But’s he’s fast.

In no time, he’s halfway from the distance we started with. The others in his little group were also fast. They were able to find shortcuts and corner me, but I’m tricky with how I move and my size allows me to hastily slip through the narrowest pathways compare to their muscular builds. I don’t know this place well.

“Gotcha!” I was caught off guard when suddenly a man crashed through a wooden fence. He pushed me onto the ground and raised his axe. “Geh!?”

Why did he hesitate? Was it because of the smile I was holding? That’s right, you thought I would be scared shitless. Too bad! I’m already someone willingly to accept death! I really wished I had a mirror. I would have loved to see which kind of my hundred faces of smile it is. My smile was able to buy me a fraction of a second I needed to fight back. I took my stone filled purse and smacked him before he decided to chop my head off.

“So close, so close!” I tore my bag for a dose of stamina potions. The contents turned from liquid into vapour as it ran down my throat and reenergized my body. It’s flavourless like water, just so if you’re wondering about the taste.

As I drank, my attacker recovered and lunged towards me. Two knives disarmed my attacker’s weapon at the same moment I smashed the glass bottle over his head and continue running. There he is!

From the rooftops, a small piece of a cloak figure’s cloth fluttered as it sinks behind the buildings above.

I found you, my mysterious stalker~! Seems like I guessed right for number 2. The king doesn’t want me to die yet. As for this stalker, he’s is doing exactly what I said for condition 1.

“Fuck, what are you smiling about!?” Another man leaped from the alley and ambushed me.

My body felt hot. This pleasure from people wanting me dead is nostalgic. Sorry, I can’t die now.

“Free money!” I shouted as I threw a purse of stone and copper coins in his face. It stunned him until he was ran over by denizens of the slums.

“Move! Fuck! Gah!”

I was able to catch a glimpse of the stalker. I stole one pursuer’s axe and my stalker’s knives then ran deeper into the slums. Luckily there were three more people who wanted me dead. They quickly found me and we continued our game of man hunt.

I’ll spare the details about the chase. Trust me, it got repetitive.

This chase began in the evening. Before I knew, night had come. My phone was charged at 45% from my solar bank and rapidly decreasing to 20% when I activated its flashlight option and useful apps. I finally rounded up my bait to corner myself in one dead end.

“We got you now! There’s no escape.” The leader huffed and puffed. He drew his stiletto and slowly closed in on me. “I’m going to carve you up real good after what you did.”

“I rather not get so close, you smell like shit.”

“That’s because its your fault!” He roared. His companions charged alongside him with their weapons ready to strike me.

I’ve ran randomly, around, in buildings and everywhere of the slums. I lured many crowds together to distract and block roads of these delinquents. All of these should cause a panic for my stalkers.

“Stop!” My white knight dropped in front of me. He was cloaked in the same style as I spotted him, wielding a sword. Appearance wise, he’s just as suspicious as me. “Further attempts to harm this man will result you three locked in dungeons.”

“But he-!”

“Do I make myself clear?”

“Tch. This isn’t over!” The leader shouted back as he waddled away with the other two.

Taking my chance, I revealed the axe underneath my jacket and swung at him. He blocked it. I flashed him with my phone continued my surprise to tripped him. You should see the look in his face, his eyes were widened. Then with the knives he kindly gifted me, I stabbed one next to his neck.

“You bastard-.”

“I’ve been looking for you.” I couldn’t contain my excitement and interrupted. “This little game of cat and mouse has ended. Seems like this rat has finally ratted the cat into his trap, don’t you think?”

Slowly, I gently scratch the surface of his neck with the blade. Most would be scared what I planned to do. My stalker says otherwise. He has a good pair of eyes, not of fear or hate. He’s disciplined enough to note I would not harm with if he wouldn’t do anything rash.

“What do you want? Do you want to know who sent me?”

“Close, but I already know. It’s the king isn’t it?” His silence confirms my suspicion. “What I want is this bracelet off my wrist. Will you tell this scum how to take this off?”

“A key.”

“And where will I find this key?”

“You won’t.” A third voice rang behind me. Before I thought about turning around, I could feel something poking my neck. “Arden Charles, on behalf on our king’s orders you are under arrest. Public disturbance, assault on the innocent and authorities, destruction of properties. Those are your crimes. What say you?”

“Well hot diggity do. It seems I lost this game. There was a dog chasing a cat chasing a rat.” I was so focus on one, I forgot the possibility of another stalker. “Those are some low level crimes I did- Oof!”

I got what I deserved for being careless. My consolation prize? A mighty blow to my head rendering me unconscious. Dane, hold on to my share of money for a bit longer would you? This might take a while.

-

-

“Discovered: Unusual guest.”

“Don’t tell me I died from that pathetic blow?”

I’m back to where the angels were, only this time I’m alone and scenery changed. It’s not a black void like last time. Instead, I see trees hanging upside down from the ceiling, floating cats, red veins wrapping the white background. I’m keeping my balance thanks to the blue disc of flames acting as my ground. This is some weird shit I’m smoking.

Standing in front was a different type of angel I don’t remember from the last group. Her wings were mechanical, cyborg like and implanted on both sides of her hips. If you ask me, I won’t know if she’s a robot or a being modified to look like that.

“Fuck, I won’t forgive myself if I ever die from something like that.” I muttered.

“Correction: You are not dead.”

“Then why am I here?”

“The most logical answer: We have failed to provide you with power equal to other pawns sent to each kingdoms. We have noticed your crest has malfunctioned, your crest’s only function is to translate the spoken language of the world.”

Crest? That meant everyone aside from me has gotten some magical esper superpowers. If I encounter them with my schemes, it’d probably be a kid’s heroes and villain show where I would lose. And I hate losing. It doesn’t get my opponent mad enough to call me names.

“Therefore, conclusion: We will repair your crest and have you return-.”

“Don’t want it. Someone as loco coco as me does not deserve to be a hero. I don’t want some convenient powers that’ll suddenly make my life easier. Instead, why not give me information regarding to the powers of my former classmates?”

“Denied: Wish can not be granted. Your request violates the rule of the war game.”

I thought as much. If I knew everyone’s weaknesses from the start, this game wouldn’t last very long. I’ll have to settle for the second best outcome for this bargain, but based on the technology integrated in the angel’s body, I’m practically up against a calculating machine. There’s no chance to win but to aim for a consensus. That seems most logical.

“How about invincibility-.”

“Denied: The rule states the pawns can only given powers of crests provided by us angels.”

“And by these crests… can you explain?”

“Affirmative: Access granted. I have been given permission to lecture you.” The angel nodded.

I wanted to grab my phone, then I noticed most of my belongings from the real world was left behind. Anyways, here’s a brief summary:

-All crests are different. They only allow the users to use what weapons their crest is printed on the back of their hands. I remember seeing Bastian’s with two spears and a shield.

-Based on their given weapons, they are not allow to use others. Instead, it follows a video game setting to unlock skills the more proficient you are at using the weapon.

-They are translators. I already posses the ability to understand the spoken language of this world, but I lack the understanding of characters. I can talk but not read.

-Crests have the ability to open a storage compartment to safely store your items.

-They allow you analyze objects. This does not include peeking at other people’s status.

Having a crest might be the right thing to do, but have you thought about cons for the long run? A crest defines as a hero from one of the two factions in war. You can be targeted by the opposing kingdoms at any moment. These crests also restrict the ability to use many types of weapons. I wouldn’t be able to use my knife or the axe I picked up if it wasn’t for this malfunction.

There’s also the scenario my real body is in. I should be locked up in a dungeon right now. If I accept this crest and am discovered, the king will surely force me back on the roster to fight in a troublesome war.

“Uncertain: Any more questions?”

I need something that’s equal to these crests, or better. I don’t know how well I can bargain with a machine.

“Yes, you mentioned all pawns must be given equal power at the start of this game. By now, I would have lost the time needed to get on their level. Perhaps the compensation for information would be alright to catch up to the other’s level?”

“Uncertain: Checking with administrator. Please wait.” The cyborg angel stood stilly.

This game has a admin? Wonder what the person looks like. Is it a god, alien or someone like us that won a game similar to this?

“Answer: Permission granted. However, depending on the information you seek, we may remove some functions your crest may serve you. We will also revoke your request if the information you wish for violates the rules.”

Good, this allows me to avoid being a hero. Now what question should I ask? What is it that I needed to know most? That’s right, there’s something bothering me at the start when I met the angels.

“How does one win this game?”

“Answer: By becoming the victors of the war.”

“Then what’s the purpose of demons as the third force in this fight?” This question immediately put the angel in silence. As I thought, having a third force when two’s enough for this war game is weird. If they really wanted us to kill each other, two is enough.

“Proposal: We will remove one function of your crest if we are to answer your question. Is that alright?”

“Take away the weapon’s skill tree one.” I declared.

“Acknowledged: Removing UPI 64957.” The angel brought a screen in front of her. “Answer: Demon King acts as a challenging faction and increases pressure.”

“And by faction… you mean they also qualified to have the same status as the two kingdoms?”

Again the angel went silent. I feel like I’m getting close to something but I cannot wrap my mind around it. Something about a third faction could be a secret route to win this war.

“Proposal: We will remove two functions of your crest if we are to answer that question. Confirm?”

“Do it. Take away the storage and ability to use chosen weapons.”

“Acknowledged: Removing UPI 64972 and 64931. Answer: yes.”

A simple yes. No detail or meaning behind it but that concludes my suspicions. The demon king is an objective to unlocking a second route to victory. My main unaskable question; What happens if we defeat the demon king? Or How do we win by defeating the demon king? Will surely violate the rule.

“One last question. If you need to, remove my ability to read characters of this world. To win this game, can we just defeat the enemy faction?”

“Removing UPI 64967. Answer: Yes.”

That was more of a broad question, not anything at particular.

I got everything I could from this tight lipped angel. I would love to keep the ability to analyze objects and understand the spoken language so I can’t afford to ask more.

“Ending: Then as promised. I will return you to your world. Hero-, no. You have refused to accept the crest. I hereby appoint you as a wanderer. I wish you the very best on your journey.”

“I do too~. I can’t to see what I can do in this world you brought me.” I said as I was bathed in white light that brought me back to the game.

-

-

I wake up from my pleasant dream. Someone must’ve changed me into these wonderful comfy clothing of rags. My arms and legs were chained. They really took everything from me.

The room around was dark, lit by a small torch behind the bars in the cellular hallway. I slowly felt the area to map the area. I’m on a worn carpet, no blankets. Stone walls surround me. I hear the cries of Prisoners and convicts from the opposite side from the results of brutal treatment by guards.

Then something pinched my head, the two bobby pins I bought was not confiscated. Lady luck still smiled on me.

I’m not in a hurry to escape. Let’s test out the analyze properties shall we?

“Analyze.” I looked down at my chains.

Staxains DUL: 25/25 A deelrupp claxabtow staxains voaxank te lochlind cenvinds.

“Shit! Seriously!? I can't read this! That fucking angel got me!” Here I thought anything analyzed would automatically be translated.