I walked up to my chest and picked it up, closing the lid and hefting it under one arm. I then stored my compass and my map into perfectly sized pockets along the right leg of my jeans. I found a sharp piece of rock and started cutting into the dragon, then I looked up at one of its teeth, threw the rock down and found a large stone to smash one out with. After a few minutes my arms burned, and I was dizzy. Endurance 10 sucks! I got frustrated and threw the stone at the tooth that hadn’t budged a bit. The tooth cracked in half and fell in two pieces with a jagged edge on both. I picked it up and started digging in the dragon, where I thought there might be some magical crystals. The tooth hit something solid and another prompt sounded.

You have found a magical crystal! These magical crystals are used to fuel the dragon gods, there are 5 sets in total and when collected together will provide the owner with near limitless power! This item is of Legendary status. You know what they say about blind squirrels!

Yeah, yeah but I don’t see any squirrels finding legendary artifacts. At this point I was covered from head to toe in dragon gore, but my clothes were perfectly clean. The blue flame had finally died down, and stopped burning, settling in on a low smolder sending putrid fumes of smoke up around me. I wasn’t worried about the light going out though because the crystals seemed to emit their own pure white light from deep inside. This caused a swirling light to cascade off the cave walls, ceiling and floor like light reflected off a rippling water surface. The crystals were smaller than I expected weighing in at just about 2 pounds each. I was expecting to find something much larger considering the amount of power these things gave to Zekros.

This whole process had taken what must have been hours and based on the condition of the corpse when I woke up, it must have been on fire for quite some time before I came to. I was starting to worry about Drew.

“Drew!” I yelled. “Drew! I totally just bossed that dragon; did you see it? Save that video I am going to want to watch it a few hundred times!”

No reply.

I continued looking around the area, then I dropped one of the crystals. It bounced, skid and rolled as I chased after it head down reaching out like a sprinter about to leave the start line. That is when I ran head long into my chest knocking it over and causing my vision to blur.

Congratulations! You have found another article of Lucky Clothing! You are getting the hang of this whole chest thing now, way to use your head! These lucky socks are a little worn out but will never wear completely through. They absorb ambient luck, and add to your luck stat, the longer you wear them without a wash the more luck they will add. The luck washes out with the stink though, so make sure you don’t wash them before a big battle.

That is strange, I lifted a sock to my nose and sniffed. They smelled like every Hawaiian breeze fabric softener I have ever used. I slipped them onto my bare clawed feet and stood up. I eyed a particularly smooth slightly downward slopping rock and took off sliding the 10 feet across with a huge smile on my face. That slide would make those brats in Wally World jealous. I then returned, but this time I fell halfway back sliding on my back and tail coming to a stop as I crashed into my lucky chest. Looking around I noticed that it was still closed. That was different normally it would spit out something, guess that was more the mechanics of the game, or maybe just Murphy’s law kicking in. Probably shouldn’t be sliding on your god level artifact socks like a six-year-old in an ancient cave surrounded by who knows what. Alright time to get out of here, just need to collect a few pieces of god and maybe eat a little.

I just realized that I was hungry, guess this is a survival type game. How long had I been in here? Maybe like 10 to 12 hours? I really don’t know, but I am starving, and for some reason that dragon meat was looking tasty. Do dragonborn eat dragons? Is that like half cannibalism? How are dragonborn made? I mean who is the mom? Best not to think about that, in my background I am at least second generation having 2 dragonborn parents that sold me into slavery when I was young in order to feed my sister. I hadn’t bothered to write anything further because the game I was playing already had defined history for dragonborn, but I just came to realize that this game might be different and since I hadn’t been specific. Well time to try some dragon meat.

I ate a small bite waiting on a poisoned status or something similar, then I just dove in. I started on the parts near the burned flesh from the fire, having smoldered for a while it was pretty much medium cooked. I then started looking for the hearts for some strange reason. I was really losing myself in the moment fully submersing in the role of dragonborn adventurer. I found one of the hearts and consumed the whole thing. I then started sweating (well if felt like sweating, my scales grew dark and it itched) and realized that I needed more. I quickly sawed a huge seam down the dragon with the broken tooth and ripped at the flesh with my clawed hands. I gorged and ate the other three hearts not knowing where I was storing the huge hearts as they were all about the size of my head.

You have begun a transformation. Due to consuming the flesh of a fallen dragon you will start to change and adapt the abilities of your fallen foe. Congratulations! Since you consumed the fresh raw heart of a Dragon God of a major element, you will receive one new magical ability and a jumpstart on the transformation.

My chest started hurting like something was going to burst out, my claws grew longer, and my scales tinged blue. My back hurt like crazy and my heels started to rise off the ground as my feet elongated taking on an appearance closer to Zekros. As quickly as it began it ended, and I was left lying in the fetal position wishing that I had just beat up Drew like every other kid instead of enjoying his company. Seriously, why did the pain have to be so real? This isn’t even fun it is just sophisticated torture. Plus, it is too realistic, you can’t take out a God with a copper dagger at level 1 in a game, sure it made since in real life everything has some probability. You could even somehow get simultaneously stuck by lightning, attacked by a shark and hit by a meteorite, all while never falling off your surfboard. It wasn’t likely, but it was possible. In games there are normally hard written rules that prevent some noob from making the final boss slip on a banana and fall down a cliff. Sure, using raw math you should be able power level to level 100 in one fight, but typically games have limitations to prevent that kind of thing from happening. They also don’t spawn you in a cave with something that is apparently above the whole level system either.

Drew and his team have a lot of work to do on this game. I never thought that I would be upset about a game being too real. I remember playing side scrollers and thinking they were awesome compared to the old tennis games. Then top view, and now I can smell the dried blood on my lips, feel the flesh under my claws.

You have gained the magical ability electrical transference. Your body is now coated in scales that are excellent conductors of electricity allowing you to pass any electrical attack harmlessly over your body and to the ground. You can also learn how to absorb electrical energy; current limit is 1% of the total energy in the attack. Better not rub your feet on any carpet and attempt to touch a door knob!

That was a strange ability, and how would I absorb the energy? I hope not to find out too soon. I grabbed all my stuff and started to lumber out of the cave carrying everything that I owned, again too realistic, shouldn’t I get like an inventory or something? What if I have a bow? Do I have to carry every arrow? Do I have to carry my shield everywhere? What about a shovel, or pick when I am mining?

I headed to where I thought the entrance of the cave was, trudging along slowly when I tripped over a metal chest that I swear hadn’t been there moments before. All my stuff went sprawling out everywhere and I was left feeling like a dunce. What is my dexterity?

“You have two statistics that regulate your dexterity, flexibility and balance. Both statistics are currently capped at a value of 10.” Said the prompt voice.

“Can you read my mind?” I asked the air.

“Sort of, your conscious mind exists here because I am acting as a conduit to allow it. Every thought, and interaction you have with your physical body in this place passes through me and is then carried out. So, more like I control your actions, and you basically tell me everything you desire. I for example can’t read into your past actions, unless you specifically use them in your adventure.” She replied.

“Good to know, so you don’t know when I lost my virginity or anything like that, but you do know about the wound that I had in my foot earlier today.” I asked.

“Yes, since you expressed relief that you no longer had a foot ache, I know that you stepped on a belt buckle while getting out of bed causing a very small puncture of your foot.” She said, specifically calling me out about the severity of my wound.

“Alright, thank you for the help again.” I said, not wanting to tick off the laws of the universe.

“Anytime, and don’t hesitate to recommend new ways to improve the world for future residents. I am open to input, I may choose to ignore your advice, but you don’t have to go behind my back to Drew.” She said, seeming a little angry when mentioning my plan to talk to Drew.

“Yeah, I will try to be more open, this relationship is important to me.” I replied thinking that she sounded hot.

“My value is more than just a physical embodiment and you should respect females for more than just physical features. That is probably why it took you so long to lose your virginity.” She said finishing with a chuckle.

“Sorry, I am not accustomed to having my mind read. I will try to be more respectful in the future.” I can’t win an argument with a woman when they can’t read my mind, certainly not going to win this one.

“Don’t let it happen again.” The voice said and the feeling that I was alone returned.

Looking back, I found a large chest sitting on the ground, it was like an antique pirate treasure chest. Not like the typical ones that you think of with the round top, no like a real one made of steel with massive bars and probably weighed close to 500lbs empty. This thing was serious, and probably had a fake lock or two. I stared at the front lock and decided it was fake with the light of the crystal in my hand. I then inspected the top, the most logical place to put a key hole, and found a removable panel. That was nice, but that still didn’t help with the lock. I learned how to pick locks watching video tutorials a while back, but this wasn’t a pad lock, and I didn’t even have a hair clip. I sat both hands on either side of the key slot and attempted to investigate the key hole using the crystal sitting just inches away. When my second hand was sitting against the chest, I heard a click, then some greased metal on metal sliding, and the top popped opening a fraction of an inch. I placed both hands under the lid and lifted hard pulling the lid open fully. Inside I noted that the lid was spring open assisted and that there was a total of nine half inch thick two-inch-wide bars that held the top secure. Then I investigated the chest. The inside was lined with what looked like blue swede but felt like silk. The air inside smelled old, like the first time you open a reactor compartment after a few months, or for everyone that hasn’t done that maybe an old fridge that was closed for a few years? The reactor compartment was accurate, I need to work on my comparisons. In the bottom of the box was a large black sack that shined in the crystal light. I was surprised that it was empty, honestly why would there be an empty strongbox in here with a dragon god? I pulled out the large bag and pulled the cord loose, feeling like I was about to save Christmas.

Inside of the bag was nothing, I don’t mean there wasn’t anything in the bag, what I mean is there was nothing! Like the inside lead to outer space! I peered over the side, then back into the bag. I picked up a stone, dropped it in, then turned the bag over, nothing fell out. Was this like a bag of holding or something? I held it up and thought “stone” and it fell out into my waiting hand. Still not trusting the bag I wondered what else was in there.

“I am wondering what is in this bag.” I stated to the person that wasn’t standing around me.

No reply.

“It would be nice to be prompted on what this is.” I stated flatly to the non-existent sentient being.

Still no reply.

Was the actual universe mad at me? Had I screwed up?

I decided that while I was not willing to drop my chest in, or the crystals anything else could go in, and I could test the capacity out. I walked back over to the corpse of the dragon and started harvesting all the meat, flesh, teeth, claws and even some bones that I could handle. The bag stayed empty looking and flat, like there was nothing inside at all. I thought “dragon claw” and one fell out into my hand. It seemed to be the last one I had put in. I thought “ten gold pieces” and then 10 gold fell into my hand spilling out onto the ground. I put all of it back into the bag. I don’t know what its capacity is, but it doesn’t seem to be any heavier than it was, and it doesn’t seem to be anywhere near full.

I tied the sack around my neck like a cape and found that it flowed behind me like a weightless piece of cloth, instead of a hefty sack. Then I picked up my crystals, and my chest and headed out.

I found the entrance after somewhere near three hours walking in the direction I started. I noticed that the damp cold air was flowing around me and toward my slightly illuminated and hazy destination. The damp air was like a constant fog only allowing me to see short distances when I wasn’t limited by line of sight. I finally emerged into full sunlight and the warmth of a summer day.

I was on top of a small shelf seemingly cut into the side of a dark stone mountain that switched back and forth down the side of the cliff face. At times there were stairs cut into the stones and even a couple crude wooden hand rails on the narrowest parts. I sat my chest down and stretched with a crystal in each hand allowing a deep growl to escape my mouth and I think a slight blue flame. Just then I heard a movement behind me and spun, while stepping back. I tripped over the chest I had just sat down and fell landing on my upper back sending all the air in my lungs rushing out. I scrambled to breath and engage the creature that was ambushing me. I found that there was no need to be alarmed.