《Fantasy Road Trip》Chapter 1: Slam on the Brakes!
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The sound of my jeep’s engine roared as I stepped on the gas, sending the speedometer upwards into the 70mph range. The headlights illuminated the road ahead as I looked over at the clock on the dash, 11:30pm. “Damn, Pit’s going to howl like a demon when I get home. Probly wake up the the whole neighborhood too.” I muttered as I grabbed the soda that sat in the cup holder to my side. Taking a quick sip of the medium sized coke I silently cursed the way most fast food joints did their food these days. You ask for a large drink and they say “Oh I’m sorry sir. We don’t serve drinks in those sizes anymore.”
“Fuckin’ bullshit is what it is.” I complained to myself, “If I want to get fat its damn well my choice to do so.” My right hand massaged my temples while I held onto the steering wheel with my left. All this mandatory overtime at work was driving me insane. My contract stated 9am to 5pm not 9am to 11pm damnit! Not that my wallet complained, with time and a half for overtime I was able to afford a good apartment in a decent neighborhood.
The quick massage to my temples made my slight headache dissipate. It’s not that I was over-worked or anything, life as a hospital security guard is relatively simple. You stand around when you’re not needed and look tough, or sit around and catch up on the latest few episodes of a show when you should be watching the feed from the security cameras. Sometimes though, you gotta be tough. Cause when shit goes down, you better be ready for anything.
Today, fortunately, was a slow day so work wasn’t too stressful. It was just boring standing around the entire time doing nothing. The hospital I worked at had a gym which I would love to work out in, but it was only to be used by physical therapists and their charges. Shame too, as I would have loved to spend some time jogging on the treadmill or lifting some of the free weights.
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“But nooo that would be too distracting.” I complained in a nasally voice, mocking my superior. “You’re needed in the reception area not traipsing about on a treadmill!” I didn’t hate my boss, on the contrary, I liked him as he was a nice guy. “Man things would be different if I were in charge.” I mused, stroking my beard, pleased by the thought of being head of security. “The pay raise wouldn’t be bad either.”
I shook my head, promotions would come eventually. For now my goal was to get home, take a shower, change out of these blue jeans and black shirt, and then go to bed. Then I'd wake up and do it all over again. I grumbled at the thought of another late shift. Just as I was beginning to lose myself in my thoughts and bright light illuminated the area ahead of me.
“What the hell…” I spoke as I squinted at the source of light. It was bright enough to be daytime! Just ahead of me this giant white…portal appeared directly in my path. And I was going too fast to slam on the breaks and the thing was too wide for me to swerve and avoid it.
“Oh shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-“ I yelled and covered my face with my arms as I slammed on the breaks and plunged into the portal.
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“Neyehahahaha, worry not little one,” A large robed figure spoke to a small girl in a manic voice. The two were in a large clearing within a sparse forest. “The lord of darkness will soon arrive here and plunge this world into chaos! You shall receive the honor of being their first sacrifice!” The small girl began to whimper. The whimpers soon turned to cries as the large robed figure laughed and danced in the moon light.
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Instantly the clearing was greatly illuminated as a portal split the air within the clearing off to the side of the small girl that was tied up in the middle of a circle of runes and various objects of power.
“He comes! The Lord of Darkness comes! Shadows be praised! The Lord of Darkness has arri-“
THUMP
The small girl watched the large robed man fly through the air. Fearfully, she turned her head towards where the portal once was. In its place stood a large black metallic beast with two bright eyes that focused straight ahead. Then she watched the side of the beast open and from within out stepped…a strange-looking man?
“What the fuck did I just hit?!”
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There is no Epic Loot here, Only Puns.
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