《A Meaningless Hero》Chapter 18: Meaningless Hope
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A voice, bidding him farewell.
Gray's eyes snapped open.
"Eliza?"
He called her name, but there was no response.
He scrambled to his feet, frantically spinning in every direction.
Rain.
It was raining.
It was raining, and the figure of the one he wanted to see the most was nowhere to be seen.
"Eliza? Come on. This isn't funny."
Nobody answered.
He was alone, with only the rain to keep him company.
After standing there with no response, he was forced to realize it.
Eliza was gone.
A splitting headache. Without knowing why, Gray suddenly felt his head throbbing. No. To be exact it was his eyes.
Gray winced and drew his sword, using it as a makeshift mirror.
Seeing that, he dropped the sword, almost cutting off his feet.
-Crimson. His blue eyes were now laced with crimson, the exact shade of Eliza's own eyes.
A nagging sensation at the back of his mind. But there wasn't enough evidence to confirm it.
His eyes could have changed color through various reasons. Like his increased magical prowess. Right.
He shook his head and picked up his sword, putting it back in its sheath.
He didn't know where Eliza had gone, but she had mentioned something about Alain being in the capital, didn't she? It would be a good idea to visit him. Gray didn't know where Eliza had gone, but Alain would surely be capable of finding her.
With that decided, he made his way towards the adventurer guild.
...It was packed. Was it because of the rain, or was it just usually this lively?
Gray wasn't sure, but he kept to himself as he entered the vast building.
There were adventurers of all sorts around, and the building itself was much wider than the one he had seen back at Rorin village.
The layout was similar, however, and there was also the familiar sight of that gray-haired gentleman in sunglasses standing at the counter.
Alain noticed Gray's arrival and waved him over.
The act drew the gaze of adventurers nearby, but they quickly returned their attention to what they were doing.
Gray crossed the packed room, his wet clothes and shoes splashing against the tiled floor.
"Hey there, kid. You look like you've seen better days."
Gray didn't bother acknowledging the casual talk. "Alain. I need you to find Eliza."
"Eliza?" Alain frowned. "She isn't with you?"
Gray shook his head. "No she..."
He remembered what had happened. The feel of her lips on his own, holding her close to him to not let her go, the blinding pain... then darkness.
"...She's missing."
Alain's frown deepened. "Missing? That can't be. Someone as strong as her-"
"SHE'S MISSING ALRIGHT!"
A sudden outburst.
Again, the focus of the room was on him.
Gray didn't bother paying attention to them.
Eliza was missing and he needed to find her.
He needed to find her.
He needed to-
"Gah."
A splitting headache.
Gray clutched his head with his right hand.
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"Easy there, kid. No need to be so worked up. Here, why don't we go somewhere else to talk about it?" That said, Alain lifted up the counter and walked over. "Follow me. We'll chat at my place."
Gray nodded and followed him.
Walking through the rainy streets. Ducking into a side alley.
A small quaint house, not too far from the guild hall. That was where Alain lived.
A cluttered home. One filled with knickknacks of various sorts and books piled up around the house. It was a sort of chaotic mess that somehow served to be homely.
Alain gestured for Gray to sit down at the table and then vanished into a different room. He came out shortly after with two cups of tea.
"Here. This will help you warm up."
"...Thank you."
"Now, why don't you tell me what happened? Last I saw you two, you were getting along extremely well."
Gray took a sip from his tea and then told Alain what happened.
The older man put his cup down and sighed. "I see. So that's what happened."
"Do you know how to find her?"
Alain sighed. "Find her? I'm afraid not, Gray."
"You-"
Alain narrowed his eyes. "Calm yourself, kid. You know why, as well, don't you? It's about time you stopped fooling yourself. Those eyes of yours are already proof enough of what happened."
"...What do you mean?"
Alain sighed. "I mean that she loved you. Enough to give the rest of her life to keep you safe. That's why your eyes are like that now. And I had wondered why she gave me that book the last time we met…”
"Book?"
Alain reached into his jacket and pulled out a small journal. "Here. She left it for me back in Rorin village and told me to give it to you if I saw you again without her. I thought she might have left you to fend for yourself because of it, but... well, you'll probably find out if you read it."
Gray took the journal and flipped through it.
The handwriting was familiar. It was the same as the one he had in the other journal telling him about his flaws.
It only took a few flips through the page for him to realize it.
"Eliza..."
Alain sighed. "I don't know if you were lucky or unlucky to meet her, Gray. But you should know that she loved you a lot. Those eyes you have now are proof of that."
He shut the book and got to his feet. "...Thank you, Alain."
"It's alright. The least I could do for someone who... well, you'll find out someday. But kid... what do you plan on doing now?"
"Now...?"
"That's right. You came all this way to learn space magic, right? Did you manage to get your hands on a tome?"
"Space magic... that's right."
Gray reached into his bag and pulled out his tome. The reason why they had come to the capital in the first place. The reason why this entire journey began.
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Alain took a glance at that and nodded. "That's a space tome alright. Shouldn't take much to learn it with how much stronger you are now. Why not give it a go?"
Gray absently nodded and opened the book.
-Simple. The magical theory was extremely simple.
Visualize the area you want to go to and clearly define it. Once done, anchor the image in your mind to serve as a waypoint and then will yourself towards it.
It was a matter of the mind's eye, but enough magical prowess could brute force the outcome.
Gray closed his eyes, remembering his apartment. While he couldn't put form to the name of his home, his country, he could still clearly see them in his mind's eye.
He focused on it, tuning out the world around him.
-It had to work. It had to. Otherwise, everything would have been a waste.
Eliza's death. The journey here.
His life had lost color with her departure. To make up for what was lost, he had to gain something at least equivalent in exchange. One life for another... that was fair, right? If Eliza died and marked the end of his life in this world, then he should at least be able to gain his old life back in the other world.
A slight crackling. Gray felt and then heard energy crackling around his body.
"Looks like you've got it, kid. Well, have a nice trip. If you ever need anything, just head to a guild hall and mention my name, alright?"
Alain called out to him, but Gray didn't answer.
-Home. He wanted to go home. To the place he had been before all of this started. To the place before his life had taken this turn.
With that thought placed firmly in his mind, as well as the image of where he had been, everything went dark.
Gray felt a void close itself around his entire body, as if he was sliding through a tube- no. That wasn't right. It felt more like cold air was rushing past him, a silent wind blowing through time and space.
The wind died.
Gray opened his eyes.
A field of grass on his right and an old building in the distance.
-No. That wasn't right. It used to be an old building. It had been an old building until it collapsed.
"No."
Gray took a step back, dropping the space tome.
"No, no, no!"
It was a familiar scene, but not the one he had envisioned.
It was the place where he had first arrived in this world.
Gray shook his head. "This has to be a mistake. I must have done something wrong."
He picked up the tome and tried again. Thinking it to be in the fact that his concentration was lacking, Gray spoke the suggested incantation.
"Spatial winds billowing across dimensions. I entrust myself to your guidance... lead me to my destination!"
Words containing power. An incantation charged with all the energy he could muster with his current level of magical prowess.
Wind billowed around him again, but this time Gray kept his eyes open.
He saw the space around him crack and shatter, blurring into the darkness. Moments later, he saw himself crossing an empty void. Guided by his spell through the cracks in space, he arrived at his destination.
A field of green grass. A ruined building in the distance.
-He hadn't even moved a single inch from where he started.
Gray tried again.
He was sent flying through the cracks in space, but landed in the same area.
Once. Twice. A dozen times.
Over and over he recast the spell, varying it countless times.
He thought it might be due to the location. Because of that, he tried going to other places he had seen before.
Lyre Falls.
Rorin village.
Eternia.
After a hundred times teleporting around like a madman, he was forced to admit it.
-The spell wouldn't allow him to go home. Or rather, what he defined as 'home' in this world led to where he was.
"Ha."
A laugh escaped from his lips.
"Haha."
Laughable. The entire situation was laughable.
"HAHAHA! After all of THAT! THIS, is what I end up with?"
A spellbook that was useless for getting him home. The long journey across the land, the times he shared with Eliza... it had been cut short because of his desire to return home and half-hearted whim of learning space magic to do so.
Crack.
"Meaningless. All of it. This whole journey... don't tell me it was meaningless?"
Something broke and then there was a throbbing pain in his head. Was it an illusion? As Gray was standing there, the whole world seemed to be colorless and filled with cracks.
"Eliza's death. Her and her. Both of them. Died... they died for no reason...?"
The first had done so to try and teach him the meaning of life. A way to bind him to a world he wanted no part in.
The second had done so because of trying to fulfill his selfish and reckless wish of getting home as fast as he could.
Meaningless. Both of them had died for a meaningless reason.
Gray laughed and walked back towards Eternia, space automatically bending to his whim.
-Raining. It was still raining.
Because it was raining, the world was dyed gray, as if all the colors were washed away.
He staggered through the streets, casting idle glances at the few passing him by.
Manly adventurers heading towards the next bar.
Young teenagers kissing in the rain, out for a secret rendezvous.
Small, isolated incidents. Disconnected lives and events.
-Meaningless. They meant nothing to him, would mean nothing to him. Just a happenstance he came across while wandering in the city.
Meaningless.
Their lives. Those actions.
In the end, nothing would come of it.
Just like his.
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