“I, uh... see,” was all I managed to say, “are you here against your will...?”

“Of course not! My family and I have served the Innsworth household for generations, and it is my great honour to tend to the Lord of the Night. It is an honour few ever receive. I am well trained in all aspects, and I hope to be of your liking.”

“Oh,” I said, it hadn't occurred to me that people would willingly serve vampires. I had to think of a way out of this... “But uh, are you trustworthy, uh, loyal and all that?”

“Of course! Master Innsworth has provided shelter and income for my family and I, and he is more than generous to his servants. Many have volunteered for this position, and I have been chosen because of the great assets that I bring. I would never think to betray the master.” Well there goes my plans to say no because she was here against her will. Ok, time for plan B... whatever the hell that is.

“How many others are there? I mean, humans that live here.”

“Including myself there are 15 others who reside here permanently, and about 30 or so who come and go seasonally... Am I... am I not to your liking?” She asked, the look of disappointment was pretty darn clear.

“Oh no no, you're lovely!” I said, desperately thinking of a way out of this situation, “But I can't um, I mean I won't feast on you.”

“I knew it, I'm not good enough.” the girl said, her voice wavering as tears began to well up in her eyes, “I am sorry to have disturbed you, I shall take my leave.”

“No! Look, I can't because I uh...” Come on brain, think of something! “I'm on a... a new diet right now. I'm uh, trying out human food, I heard it was pretty good so I'd have a go at it.”

I was bullshitting out of my teeth, but I hope she bought it. With an excuse that ludicrous I would be amazed that anyone in the world with half a brain would.

“But I thought my lord and his kind could only attain nourishment out of blood, was I mistaken?” Elizabeth said, looking somewhat better.

“Oh no, of course not. You're right, but I'm kind of different, I go against conventional wisdom and what not, being the Lord of the Night or what not. But don't tell the others about it, I don't want to stand out.” ... and I would probably die if Robert and his people found out that I wasn't a vampire, but I left that bit out.

“I understand,” she said, looking a lot better, “should I go and get you something else to eat?”

“Oh, that would be lovely. Nothing fancy, I'd take anything right now!”

It took Elizabeth a few minutes to come back with a couple of sandwiches, a slice of apple pie and a cup that smelled of coffee. The stuff looked delicious!

“I'm sorry, my lord, this was all I could come up with in such short notice... If my lord wants I can ask the cooks to make something better.” Elizabeth said. She was wearing a thin silk nightgown now, but that just accentuated her figure more than anything else.

“Oh no, this is fine. And no need to be so formal, just call me Frank.”

I took the platter from Elizabeth and started to wolf down the food, taking a few sips of coffee along the way.

“Oh no, my lord, that would be too discourteous.” she said, staring at the floor.

“Please just call me Frank, it'll make me feel more at ease.”

“If that is what my lord wants.”

I sighed and rubbed my temples with my fingers, “Look, I'm sure we're going to see each other a lot more from now on, so it would be much appreciated if you can just drop the formalities and just act like yourself. I'm not going to get angry or anything, ok?”

“I... I understand.” the girl said, finally lifting her gaze from the ground and on to the food.

“Oh, do you want some of this?” I said, pointing at the food.

“Oh no! Of course not, my l- I mean Frank,” she said, blushing, “I was just surprised to see someone like yourself eat so much human food. I'm sorry, it was rude of me to stare.”

I laughed, and a bit of pie came out of my mouth, “Don't worry about it. I guess it must be strange, eh?” I dusted some of the crumbs off the bed and continued, “But this food's pretty good, especially the pie. I've paid for pie that tasted less delicious, who made it anyway?”

“I did, my lord.”

I looked at her and forced a little cough.

“I mean, I did, Frank.”

“Wow,” I said, “you're pretty good. You gotta teach me sometime.”

“Thank you.” she said, “When I'm not tending to the masters I help out at the kitchen. But Frank, someone of your status shouldn't be seen cooking.”

I sighed again, I guess being seen as someone of power puts a lot of restraints on the person. And even though I'm telling Elizabeth to act normally she hasn't changed much aside from dropping the “my lord” bit. Do these kinds of problems plague all of the nobility?

“Ah, never mind.” I sighed again.

“Is something the matter? You've been signing a lot...” Elizabeth said, inching a bit forward with concern on her face.

“No, it's nothing. I just need to head to bed is all.” I couldn't exactly tell her that I was sighing because of the way she's acting.

“Of course,” she said, blushing, “I am ready.”

Elizabeth moved to a few inches away from where I sat on the bed and removed her silk gown. The thin fabric slid off her lovely figure with serpentine grace, revealing the pale skin underneath. She held her wavering arms across her chest, and even in the dim light I could see her shaking.

“Oh!” I said, inching a little bit back, “No, I'm fine, really. You don't have to do that. I'm uh, still wounded from the earlier, so uh, let's just call it a day?”

“If m'lord wishes...”

She bowed again and quickly left the room. I could see that she was relieved, but I knew that I had damaged her pride by rejecting her invitation like that. I put the dishes on the night-stand and buried myself in the blankets; should I have just accepted her there? I mean, she was more then willing, and drop-dead gorgeous to boot... but I knew that I couldn't have taken advantage of a kid like that. Stupid, stupid morals.

* * *

I hadn't realized that I had fallen to sleep, but apparently I did. Without a window or a clock I had no idea what time it was, but by the dim bustling of activity I heard I could see that it wasn't too late or early. I changed out of my ragged pants and checked the closet for something fresh. I found some clothes that looked like it would fit – a new pair of dress pants and a white shirt – and put them on. With nothing else to do I left the room, but was stopped by a maid almost immediately.

“I'm sorry to disturb you, sir,” she said, “but the Master has instructed me to get you when you awoke.”

“Ah, ok.” I said dozily, “Do you know what time it is?”

“It is about a quarter past 8, sir.”

“8 AM?”

“PM, sir”

“Of course...” I muttered, “Yeah, just take me to Robert.”

The maid led me to the west wing and into a large office, I saw Robert immediately. He was wearing his usual black suit and sat behind a rather expensive looking desk. There were papers littered everywhere and maps of various places stuck to the walls, whatever he did in there looked pretty important.

Besides Robert stood a young, rugged looking man. He was maybe 5'11, with blonde hair and a regal face, and a figure that I'm sure many women would idolize. He was wearing casual looking clothing and looked a little more than agitated upon seeing me.

“Ah, Frank! I do apologize for sending someone to get you, “ the man said, getting up from his seat, “but I knew not when you would awake.”

“It's fine.” I said.

The young man beside Robert stared me down, and spat, “Watch your tone when you're addressing the Master.”

“That's quite all right, Phil, he is a guest. Now then!” Robert said, guiding the other man to me, “I have asked Phil here to guide you around town. He comes from a respectable family and is loyal to me; he is additionally well versed with the town's history and will thus make an excellent guide.”

“Yeah.” Phil mumbled. Apparently he wasn't too keen on the idea of guiding me around.

“Now then, Phil, if you would be so kind as to prepare the car for departure?” Robert said, his tone indicating that it wasn't a request.

“Of course, Master Innsworth.” the young man bowed to Robert, then glanced back at me with eyes filled with venom before leaving.

“He seems like a nice guy.” I said sarcastically.

“I must apologize, my lord,” said Robert, “but he is still young and keen to spouts of jealousy. Phil lives outside the manor and is thus unaware of your status, as per your instructions, but I assure you that he will do as I bid without question. And, as per your request, I have not informed him of your true nature, but rather, that you are a being who is a valued guest.”

“Thanks, but he sure don't seem to like me though, what's his deal?”

“Ah, he seems to think that you are a new member of the family, freshly turned, and that I am favouring you over my other vessels. I would imagine that he finds it disgraceful for him to have to escort my lord around. Sadly, I had not thought this through.” the man said, frowning “I apologize for acting without your input, but I thought it wise to have your guide be someone who knows the town well and someone who does not know of your status. If my lord wishes I can send someone else.”

“No, it's fine.” I said, “I'm kind of getting tired of everyone treating me like nobility anyway, this change of pace would be nice.”

A felt a dark grin on my face as I turned away.

“After all,” I added, “this could be fun.”

I left Robert to his work and got in his car with Phil. The trip to town took only 10 minutes, but Phil and I didn't exchange a single word during the trip. We found a parking spot on the outskirts and the silence was finally broken.

“They said your name is Frank, eh?” Phil said.

“Yeah, it's Frank Morgan. It's nice to meet you.” I said smiling, extending my hand.

He ignored it and said, “Don't think that just because you're getting special treatment from the Master that you're special yourself. Master Innsworth's always nice to his servants, but that doesn't mean that the rest of us are.”

“I wouldn't think of it!” I said, still smiling.

“And for the record, I don't like you.” he spat, “Some fucking fledgling like yourself don't last long around here, so I'd watch my back if I were you.”

“Really? My goodness, you not liking me? I'd never have guessed!” I was thoroughly enjoying myself, and I hoped he heard the thick sarcasm in my voice, “What could I have ever done to upset a barbarian like yourself?”

“Fucking jokers like you, think your big stuff now that you're one of us!” he moved with inhuman speed and grabbed my collar, “Think you're better than me just 'cause the master fancies you a bit? You better watch that mouth.”

I saw the anger in his face, but I also knew that he couldn't take me in a fight. Just something about pissing this Phil guy off made me chuckle inside. I guess this was one way of relieving the stress I've had from the days prior, and you know what? I don't like this “joker” either. I've seen his kind all my life now, always taking advantage of others because they feel like they're entitled to the world, but no one ever bothers to bring them back to reality because they have the protection of their daddies and mommys. Just like my boss who would make me work for hours on end without pay, or those damn snobs who took my well earned position because they know the right people. But fuck that now. If these people think that I'm the Lord of the Night or whatever, then I'll damned well act like it.

“Oh my! I'm just shivering in my shoes!” I said, letting the sarcasm drip from my mouth, “Whatever shall I do? Well, I just hope Master Innsworth doesn't hear about this! I mean, you are assigned to be my guide after all. Could you be a good dear and take me somewhere nice?”

“You little fucking prick! You think you can hide behind the Master's name?” Phil said, his eyes almost bulging out with rage, “If I break your fucking teeth in do you think that you could still tell the Master?”

“I'd like to see you try,” I said, patting him on the cheeks with my free hand, “big boy.”

“You're fucking dead!”

I cleared my mind and saw the subtle energies shift as Phil tried to throw me to the ground. Instead of letting myself hit the ground like he wanted, I did a series of miniature ports in mid-air so that it looked like I landed safely from an impossible angle.

“Oh goodness, you almost dirtied my shirt!” I said, laughing a little. I haven't had this much fun in ages! Just looking at Phil's dumbfounded face made the night a thousand times brighter.

The idiot composed himself slightly and made a mad charge at me. He was going at me like a truck, and at the same speed as well. What surprised me, however, was that even though I knew that he was heading towards me at a breakneck speed, I perceived everything nice and slow. It seemed like I had all the time in the world to react. I'm going to have to wonder how I was able to do that later, but I wasn't going to let a good thing pass. Thinking for a bit, I realized that I simply had to shift a few inches to the side and extend a leg to block his trajectory. He tripped like I predicted and landed face first on the ground.

I laughed harder.

“Yeah, you think that's funny, huh?” he said, spitting out some dirt, “Think you're so cleaver because you can dodge? You wont find it funny when I pound your face in!”

His face was contorted in rage and his once regal looking face was unrecognisable. It was funny, seeing this idiot get so worked up. I didn't even pity the fool.

“Oh,” I teased, “you might want to get your blood pressure checked. You look awfully red!”

I could see that I really got his blood boiling, so to speak, because he went and picked the car up. Like, right over his head. I could see his feet sink into the ground from the weight, and I actually was surprised that he was that strong.

“Not laughing now, are ya?” he shouted, and even from this distance I could see the veins on his neck bulging from the effort.

He moved a few steps and threw the car at my direction. He was right, that action did surprise me. I was surprised at how strong he was, sure, but I never could have imagined that he was dumber than he was strong! I was at least a good several dozen feet away, and there was no possible way for him to aim; I didn't even need to move to get out of the way of the car. I stood still and watched the hunk of metal fly past me to slide a few feet to my right.

“Oh, was that supposed to hit?” I said, feigning ignorance, “And you've destroyed our ride home! If I let this continue, you'll wreck the whole town, so I guess I should take the initiative now, eh?”