Shipping Mishaps Chapter 4

An unassuming section of wall, about 200' down from the med bay, slid back to reveal a 20'x20' room. The lights inside mostly flickered to life, revealing racks upon racks of weapons. Several they could all recognize, several they couldn't. There were “rifles” of several types, blades, “handguns”, and grenades. One wall contained what could only be called armor. Most of the armor wouldn't fit Geo, but would probably fit her new crew.

“Someone go wake up Mr. Teddy”, Geo waved at the crew. “Everyone else grab a weapon.”

One of the slugs went back down the hallway, everyone else stepped into the room.

“Alright, since we are going to be bridge crew, everyone grab a handgun, and maybe a knife.” Geo stood by one of the racks, and handed each being a handgun and a holster for it. “Campy, do these need any sort of ammo?”

“Ammo? Oh, you mean ammunition. Yes. The next rack over to your right carries the energy packs for those weapons.” Campy replied.

“So, Campy, do all shipping ships carry an armory like this? Or is this ship special?” Geo asked.

“Captain Geo, this is only a weapons locker, Every square 'mile', as you measure things, of deck has ten such lockers. They are kept for emergency's. The secondary armory is located near the command bridge. The armory proper is located next to the battle bridge.” Responded Campy. “As for your other question, this is a decommissioned military parasite super carrier. At present, 98% of military specific functionality is disconnected or missing.”

“Um, OK...So, this isn't some small ship, or a standard freighter?” Asked Geo.

“No Ma'am.” was the swift reply.

“Cool beans.” Geo responded. “Alright everybody, once Mr. Teddy gets here, lets get back to the bridge!”

A few minutes later, a cringing Hershtang staggered into the weapons locker. “Captain,” he saluted Geo, “I accept your right of leadership, and will follow you to the ends of the universe.”

Confused, Geo just stared at him, then finally responded, “Good? I wound hate to have to kick you again.”

Hershtang cringed.

A short while later, everyone having geared up, they arrived at the lift doors that would take them up to the bridge.

“Is there anything I need to be aware of when I get onto the bridge?” Geo asked.

“I have taken the liberty of awakening the crew and sending them your speech, as well as a video clip of what happened to Hershtang, and the former captain.” Replied Campy. “Also there is a Fleet Cruiser hanging 3 light seconds out from our port bow. I have also relayed your message to Trans-Union Headquarters, and expect them to respond within the hour.”

“Good to know. About how many of the crew have decided to abandon ship?” Asked Geo.

“Six so far. Several want answers as to what happened, that such a dangerous person as yourself was allowed on the ship in the first place. Several others want to negotiate new salaries.” Campy stated.

“Labor negotiations? Already? Dad wasn't kidding when he said that being the boss was a pain.” Geo shook her head. “Gods above, I hate it when he's right.”

The Lift door opened, and they all got in.

Arriving on the bridge was a lackluster affair. There was a large holographic screen with a very aggravated creature on it. The creature was waiving tendrils everywhere, and by its look, had been doing so for quite some time.

*-*-*

'Finally, someone is on the bridge!' Hskfuie, Lieutenant of the Fleet, and commander of the Fleet Cruiser LHUIVTRMYUK thought to himself. 'Only on a civilian ship would such a thing as an abandoned bridge be allowed!' Then IT came into view. It was about six tens tall (5'2”), had light brown skin and hair, and a cruel set to its eyes. It wore what was obviously a military uniform, and was carrying two nano-dissembler grenades, in addition to a high frequency sword, and, worst of all, a pair of now illegal (even for the military) Screamer hand cannons. 'By the 17, we are all going to die'.

It started talking, not to him, but to the other members of it's crew, all of whom seemed to be members of the “League”*. The LHUIVTRMYUK 's internal alarms tripped, and the ship immediately went to red-alert, all hands to battle stations. Red and green light started flashing. The weapon stations started battle calculations while navigation consoles began running projections to enter hyperspace.

The crew sprinted onto the bridge, security officers running to emergency arms lockers, or to the armory itself, to gear up for possible anti-boarding engagements. The one thought moving through the crew was 'This isn't a drill. What in the 17 happened'.

*-*-*

On the bridge of the Ijsdefirkn, Geo wasn't paying attention to the squid-man in the holographic display, instead talking to her bridge crew and security chief, “So, my name is Georgia-Ann McConor, but you can call me Geo, or for anything important, call me Admiral Geo. I don't want to be the Captain, I don't know how a star ship works.” Looking at the crew, she nodded in turn, “And you are Grug, Glug, and Grig, and are Gurgmisk. You, dear Captain, are named...Lod-j-v-g-ne... Lod for shortsies; and you are Head Technician Ovkew. Both of you are Goraks. Mr. Teddy is a what now?”

“Mr. Hershtang Is a 'brnul*in*ESWVnul*i', but for your throat, I think we can shorten it to 'Brnul'.” Campy replied, as apparently Hershtang was unable to talk at the moment. “Also , Admiral, it appears that the Fleet Cruiser has moved to full Red Alert.”

“Well crap. Campy, please translate for me”, Geo faced the Holographic tank. “I am Admiral Geo of the freshly renamed Nautilus. With whom do I have the pleasure of speaking?” She gave her most stunning smile. Behind her, she heard the sudden intake of breath. 'Oops, apparently I shouldn't smile?' she thought to herself.

*-*-*

It had spoken to him. Then it showed him it's teeth! There was going to be a fight. No doubt about it. “Sta...Stand down your ship, and prepare to be...be boarded! We don't allow pirates in our dominion of space!” Hskfuie stammered. 'Shit. What do I do if it says no? The Dirt-rockians are top of the Go the Other Way list. They are above the lk;nh;fikl, and they are the most feared pirates in the sphere!'

It stared back at him. “Naw, I don't think so. How about you go and seek the comfort of your mothers tentacles like the little egg sack you are? Then we wont have to crush you under our armored hoof.” was It's response.

A little ink came out.

*-*-*

It was a bluff. She didn't want to have to fight a fully functioning warship. It could be bad, very very bad. Geo hoped her closed mouth smile didn't betray her nervousness.

*-*-*

The thin lipped grimace the creature pierced him with was nerve wracking. 'Am I not the captain of a ship of the line? A ship of the Fleet of Protectors? Am I not the most powerful ship in this area of space?' Hskfuie thought to himself. There was more movement in the 'tank. 'Was that a brnul*in*ESWVnul*i? Did it command one of the warriors too? Of course it did. It was a Dirt-rockian. The scourge of the great war. The planet that survived.'

“Captain Hskfuie, they have started warming up their anti-pirate weapons, but their main guns are still off line. Do they think they can take us with only civilian weapons?” The sensor tech announced.

“Ensign, what you see before you is one, I repeat, ONE, Dirt-rockian. Do your remember your history? Do you remember what ONE of its kind did to a full squad of troopers WITH JUST A KNIFE before orbital support killed it?” Captain Hskfuie asked, a little more ink escaping.

The Ensign, Gagging at the training memory, replied “Holy 17 help us!” before fainting dead away, all of his ink flowing onto the deck.

“Wait, What do you mean 'Their main guns', that is supposed to be a decommissioned ship!” The captain yelled. Looking over at sensors, he shook his tentacles in worry. “Second, what did he mean?”

The second, a young member of the bat like Lsvrt Ethui, looked over from the scanners, “Captain Hskfuie, sir, they still have all of their weapons from the great war. If we're lucky, they have all been disconnected, and the DE-com crew just forgot to remove them.”

“How do you just FORGET to remove... Never mind. Not your fault. Keep an echo on it.” was the captains only reply.

Looking at the holotank Captain Hskfuie began speaking, “You obviously don't see us as a serious threat since the main armaments haven't even warmed up. Your ancient relic may be able to survive our salvos, but when the rest of the battle group arrives, they will wipe you from the galaxy!” He crossed his tentacles as he waited for a response. There was a noise on the other end and then the 'tank went to a hold screen.

*-*-*

“Screen, hold pattern!” Yelled Geo. She looked over at the Captain, raising an eyebrow, “We have 'Main Armaments'? Campy, can you confirm?”

* Actually, the Certified League of Sentient Beings: the loose confederation of 200 recognized worlds bound together by comunal laws, diplomatic, and fiscal ties. This group administers another 300 or so worlds that are unable to self govern due to being non/nearly sentient, or colonies.