《The Downward Spiral》Chapter 8. Difficult Decisions
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I couldn't believe it.
The toll bridge we used to get into the city not even a few hours ago, was up.
This bridge hasn't been up in years.
And it was a wide drawbridge. It stretched far over the Fontana River and can take close to half an hour across it to the next town. Basically, it was near impossible to get across without this bridge or a boat.
Both Ray and I had our mouths hanging open, paralyzed in shock.
"H-how could this have happened? We haven't seen anyone around for hours." Ray stammered in disbelief.
"There has to be another way out of here. Do you think there's another route or freeway we can take to get us out of here? I don't care how long it takes, I just want to go home already!" I growled angrily, already flipping the truck in reverse.
"How the hell am I supposed to know?" He hissed, obviously not thinking clearly in his scared state of mind. "I don't live out here!"
"Duh Einstein, check your phone. Don't you have a GPS or something?
"Yeah, but-"
"I don't care what you have to say, just navigate us out of here already."
I sped off back the way we came. Goosebumps formed up and down my arms and I rubbed my bare shoulders and rolled my window up. The shadow of my truck loomed ahead of us as the setting sun fell and my mind was racing on what to do next.
Ray quickly read the directions to me while I did close to 90 heading to the next freeway.
Right as I turned down the next street for the freeway entrance, I cursed in surprise and yanked the steering wheel fast the other way, accidentally sending us spiraling off of the street and up into someone's yard.
"What the hell was that?!" Ray cried, his shaky hands clutching tightly onto his seat.
I pulled the truck along the curb and shut it off and looked at him with wide eyes. "Did you not see that?"
"Wha..."
I put my finger over my lips and shush him, closing my eyes restlessly.
It was quiet but then we heard distant growling in the symphony with many others. The last bit of sunlight vanished out of sight in my rearview, the entire city now shrouded in a dark ominous blanket.
"There were hundreds of them walking around that freeway exit, blocking it completely. There's no way I can get past them."
"Oh...what do we do now?"
I shrugged feeling all my energy drained out of me. We spent the entire day running and hiding for our lives until I was finally exhausted. "I don't know." I sighed softly and laid my head back against the headrest.
My stomach suddenly growled loudly and I realized we hadn't eaten anything since breakfast.
"Oh! That's right!" Ray shouted excitedly and started rummaging through his bag. I raised a brow out of curiosity and he pulled out a zip-lock bag full of pieces of fruit that I cut up yesterday, a few bags of chips from home, and his trail mix.
"Oh my God. Nice one Ray. You saved the day." I smiled weakly and instantly grabbed one of my bags of chips while he handed me a lukewarm cherry sports drink. "You remembered to bring my jalapeno cheese too, right?"
He rolled his eyes and held up a tiny container of my precious cheesy heaven.
"Yeah I got your damn cheese." He groaned, shaking his head and placing it into my hand.
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It was cold but I was so hungry that I didn't care. I popped open one bag of chips, spilled the entire sauce inside the bag, jumbled it around, and then munched a few at a time greedily.
Ray watched in horror with a mouth full of soggy watermelon at my eating habits but I didn't understand why. He has lived with me all my life, he should know how I act when I'm hungry and there was no stopping me.
"Slow down, what if these end up being the only source of food we have for a while until there's help?"
I stopped instantly at the thought and swallowed what was left in my mouth. I didn't consider this. I was so hungry that all I wanted to do was stuff myself like the fat pig I was. I sealed the bag and licked my fingers clean and then wiped them on my seat covers. "You're right." I said while reaching the sports drink and taking only a small gulp of it. "So if we can't get home, where should we go now?"
Ray looked glum for a moment and took a swig of his drink before wiping his mouth on his sleeve. "I have one idea. Well, two actually. One, is we can go and find the building that activates the toll bridge and maybe we can bring it back down ourselves. I don't suppose it would be too hard to figure out since someone was able to do it so easily."
I scratched my head. "Well, the only problem with that is it's all the way across on the other side of town, we won't be able to get to it unless we found a boat or swam across."
He nodded slowly and I stared at him wide eyed. "But we don't have a boat, Ray."
"Then there's the other option."
Swim?
The length of it is at least 3 miles long. We would either get washed away or drown from exhaustion.
"I would consider it if it wasn't so late at night. We could freeze to death before we even make it across."
"Well we can find somewhere to hide from these things and wait until help arrives."
I nodded. That seemed the best reasonable idea for now. "Alright where should we hide out?"
He scratched the back of his head and avoided my gaze. "Um...when we were at Lily's house, I saw her use one of those fake rocks. She grabbed her keys from under it to unlock her door. They also could have a lot of supplies we need, it's out of the cold and away from those Eaters. Plus we agreed that we would meet her there anyway so I thought it would be perfect..."
I started the truck up again, sighed and nodded. I didn't feel comfortable about it but in this kind of situation, what other choice did we have?
"Alright, let's go."
*********************************************************************
This was so wrong.
As we walked up the doorsteps to Lily's front porch, a wave of dread punched me in the gut and I started seriously doubting this. When Ray reached for the key underneath their rock I snatched his arm.
"What?" He asked.
"I just...I don't think we should be doing this. It kinda feels weird, like we're breaking and entering."
He snorted. "It's nothing you're not used to." He mumbled under his breath and turned away from me to the door.
I punched him in the shoulder. "I heard that." I said dryly. "And I'm being serious, this is different. The circumstances are different. We actually know the people who live here."
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"You knew him too."
I couldn't believe this. This was no time to act like an annoying brat like this. I flipped him around to look me in the eye so he would see that I was being serious. "Ray! Shut up already. I'm just saying, it almost feels like we're grave robbing at this point." I stated bluntly.
He didn't say anything at first. "Well, what other choice do we have?" He asked, his grip on the keys tightening. "Our other option is to hide in your truck until hopefully someone comes to rescue us while hoping that none of those things get smart enough to break in and kill us while we sleep."
I released him unwillingly and he slump back against the door. "Look, I'm not any happier doing this either and believe me, I'm going to regret doing this even more than you, but if we want to stay alive...I think this is our best bet to protect ourselves."
I didn't respond but allowed him to place the key into the slot and unlock the door to Huang's huge dark house.
Not a single light from the moon's rays touched in here, making the house feel lonely, deserted, and cold. I closed the door behind me quietly and locked the door with a soft click.
Ray explored further inside and I took my time, surveying the surroundings. Two cream laminated loveseats were centered in the middle of the living room and a square glass coffee table was placed in front of it.
Over a beautifully decorated brick fireplace was an expensive giant flat screen T.V. and upon closer inspection, the coffee table had stacks of various chick flick DVDs and two empty wine glasses.
Up and down their walls there were pictures of Lily and her mom at different vacation spots that I knew I could never afford, along with a few single pictures of two men, one older and one younger both in army uniforms that I assumed were her brother and father. I ignored their eerie happy faces and skipped over to the dining room.
Plates and cups were scattered messily over their dinner table set for two but there wasn't any food present on either dish.
My nose suddenly caught a whiff of something foul, causing me to wrinkle my nose in disgust and cover it up.
"Hey, do you smell that? It kinda smells like smoke." Ray whispered and then looked over into the kitchen.
An enormous grey cloud was burning out of a metal pot on the stove, all the contents inside fried to cinders. I rushed over to turn the dial off while Ray ran to the kitchen windows to open it and used a newspaper to fan it out.
"How long do you think that was left on for?" Ray asked, keeping his mouth covered and keeping his distance away from the smoke.
"I'm not sure, but..." I glanced around the counter and noticed what looked to be a days old hunk of red meat left out with a tenderizer beside it. I scrunched up my nose at the smell. "It looks like her mom might have left in a hurry or something."
"Either way, I think it would be best that we shouldn't light any fires soon. That means no doobies too OK?"
I scoffed and rolled my eyes before pushing past him to the living room. "Shut it brat. You know I don't do that anymore."
"Just saying." I heard him tease under his breath.
I turned and faced him with my hands on my hips. "Well, what should we do now then?"
"Turning some lights on could be a good start." He replied sarcastically and then flicked the switch on the wall behind him.
Nothing.
I raised a brow as he frantically flipped the switch up and down repeatedly and we both looked up, expecting for the high chandelier to turn on. I wandered over to the one in the kitchen and Ray trotted to the one by the front door. We both took turns flipping them on and off only to be met with the same problem.
"Damn it, do you think that the power went out?"
Now that I think about it, I didn't recall seeing any street lights on the entire drive. No porch lights either. I was driving unaware this whole time and didn't even notice. My mind has been all over the place but focused mainly on getting home. "I think it might be out for the whole town. I don't remember even seeing a single light on besides my own headlights. Do you?"
Ray shook his head. "Well, maybe her family has emergency flashlights or something we can use for now. If anything, we can always use my phone for light."
We headed over to a small staircase but I put my arm out to stop him. "I think I should handle the upstairs by myself. Since you know...it's an all girls house anyway. Feels like an invasion of privacy by letting a boy rummage through their belongings. It's best if I took care of this myself. Keep looking around down here to see if there's anything we can use."
Ray nodded reluctantly and went to go through the nearest small table drawer.
I climbed up the stairs, coming across a hallway with three rooms. The doors on the left and right were closed but the room in the middle was slightly ajar.
Hauntingly enough, I spotted a moving creature in the open one and nearly fell back down the stairs in a heart attack before I noticed that it was my own reflection off a giant mirror that turned out to be their bathroom.
"God, get a grip girl." I coaxed myself. I was practically shaking, still on edge from the whole ordeal. I was mentally slapping myself from my own stupidity but I had to stop and give myself credit. With no lights or power and no way home, my senses were on high alert.
I wandered over to the first door on my left and to my confusion, the door was...locked?
Who locks their own bedroom inside a house for two?
That's very peculiar...
I gave the door one last tug before releasing the handle and heading over to the other room.
It still bugged me and itched at my skin. I wanted to see what was inside for anything that we could use but I always love the challenge of a locked door. Nothing was too good for me to break through and I relished in that. However, I ignored it for now and went for the other one.
The other door opened with ease. When I entered, posters and pictures of our band Black Maze were scattered along the bright pink wall along with Hello Kitty and other heavy metal bands. It was such a weird combination but I knew instantly that this was Lily's room. Lolita style clothes were thrown about on her flower quilted bed. There was a fuzzy pink floor rug that had a few of her colored wigs that she wore at a few of our concerts.
I couldn't believe it's only been two days where things were normal and we were performing together along with Shawn. I coincidentally saw a picture on her dresser of when we went touring in Fresno together.
I remember that time, Ray hated it since we slept in the RV the whole time and got food poisoning from the raunchy food we ate from a gas station.
The smile that grew on my face slowly started to fade and I sighed.
Things are different and way scarier now. Was there really no way I could have saved her ? Did she choose her own fate...or was I the one who got her killed? Should I have forced her to come with us?
I heard a loud crash come from downstairs and Ray let out an audible curse.
"Everything OK?" I called out to him.
"Yeah, it's just...it's nothing, don't worry about it." He said and I heard his footsteps walk away from the staircase.
I shook my head to bring myself back to reality and started searching the room. I never really considered Lily the pigsty type but there was so much of her shit everywhere I didn't know where to start. A soft pink curtain covered over a single window still on the other end of her bed and I stepped over everything to pull it aside.
I gulped when I looked down. Those things must have followed us. There were at least ten, no twenty, swarming around the entire house. A few occupied the backyard and some were staggering by the front door. I saw more standing and blocking the path to my truck.
"Fuck not again..."
Despite the tiny light the moon provided, the sight below made me sick to my stomach that I wished that I kept the curtains closed.
I turned away and went to a little laced covered oak dresser next to her bed and spotted a small pink camouflage pocket knife with a matching colored pepper spray next to a picture of her brother. It made me sad that she didn't have these on her during all of this and could have definitely come in handy for her now.
I pocketed both and checked the rest of the room.
When I couldn't find anything else, I exited and went for the bathroom next.
I impulsively went to flick the light switch on so I could see but I completely forgot the power was out. Of course, I mumbled to myself. I went through the medicine cabinet, trying to read each label in the darkness. There were a few pill bottles I couldn't understand even if I tried. I shrugged and crouched to check through the cabinet under the sink.
"No way!" I cheered when I saw one of those bulky yellow flashlights with a pack of batteries still glued on the side for it. There wasn't much else other than shampoos and cleaning supplies so I closed it and met up with Ray. I hid the items behind my back and approached him coyly.
"So, find anything useful?" I asked him
He rubbed the back of his head and held out a few tiny circle candles with a tiny baby blue lighter. "I found these. I don't think they'll be of much use but it's better than nothing. And I found some gauze for my...hand. What about you? Was there anything up there?"
I suddenly remembered the locked room upstairs and wondered if there was anything else we could possibly use. I shook the prying thought and I showed him the spray and small knife from then held up the huge flashlight.
"Very nice." Ray smiled, his eyes beaming. "That flashlight will definitely help."
"Yeah but there's something else Ray. There's a door upstairs that's still locked. I think it's her mom's room and I-"
"You're thinking of breaking into it." He interrupted. Let me stop you there. Sasha, come on, we're already using their house and their stuff without permission to help us survive, and it's more than enough! Breaking into a room that's not meant for us, even Lily's, is just taking it a step too far."
"But what if there is something else to help us like a working phone or-"
"Sis, no."
I sighed and folded my arms across my chest defeated. "OK. Fine." I rolled my eyes and then I noticed pieces of porcelain on the floor behind him. "What happened there?"
He guiltily shifted the rug to the side to reveal even more pieces.
"I kinda accidentally backed up into it when I was searching and when I turned around, I didn't even see the damn thing." He adjusted his glasses nervously and started scooping some more of it to the side with his foot. "Try to be careful around here."
We spent another hour searching for supplies and patching ourselves up. By the time it hit 1 am, we huddled around the living room floor with blankets and turned the flashlight on. We didn't find much this time, just some snacks and just a wrench inside the garage.
Our shadows danced in the dark room as we packed our stuff into Ray's bag and then we tried to get as comfortable as we could on the couches despite the multiple groaning outside.
"What's the plan for tomorrow?" Ray asked, curling himself in a blanket that was a little too small for him.
I rolled on my back and looked up at the ceiling. "Well, what you said earlier is one idea."
He turned over and looked at me curiously. "Which one?"
"Since someone was able to raise the bridge in the time we were at the hospital, maybe it's possible to bring it back down ourselves. I mean hell, we haven't even seen anyone stable in this city, how the hell did they have time to do that?"
Ray nodded thinking. "I'm sure it's just pressing buttons to see what works. We just have to find the place that operates it and give it a try. I would think the building would be somewhere near the bridge itself. Wouldn't hurt to check it out first. Then once we're back in our hometown, we can warn everybody what's going on and then rescue Lily."
"Right." I agreed. "But for now, let's get as much rest as we can. Our biggest problem right now is figuring a way out from all the deadheads outside."
"What?" He sat up suddenly sounding startled.
Shit! I completely forgot to tell him about the pack around the house. But I don't want to rile him up. Poor guy would never get any sleep if I told him. "Nothing kid, get some sleep." I said simply and turned the flashlight off.
*******************************************************
I had to know what was inside that room.
It was driving me crazy thinking about it that I couldn't sleep. There could be a missed opportunity in there that's begging to be open. Anything in there could possibly change the course of this and make it easier. I didn't want to pass it up.
Luckily Ray was snoring away so I could climb off the couch without waking him and sneak my way upstairs. My foot creaked on the floorboards so noisily that I was sweating bullets, pausing every second to listen for Ray to spring up and catch me. When each snore slowed my beating heart, I made it to the top and went straight for the room.
I squatted down at the door, checking out the design of the lock before plucking two bobby pins from my dirty blonde hair and extending them out from each other. It felt gross to run my fingers through my hair, I could feel strands clumped together from the dried up blood caked inside and I completely forgot about showering. Maybe I'll take one in the morning.
As I worked the lock, I thought about what to change into since my outfit was caked in old blood too and I wasn't exactly too keen on putting it back on. I struggled with it a bit longer but ended up snapping it in half. I cursed and dropped both of them down in frustration. There was another trick I had up my sleeve that I learned from my ex boyfriend who showed me and I went through my pockets for my wallet.
I really suck at remembering things.
It just dawned on me that not only was my phone left at home on my bed but so was my wallet right next to it. I never thought ahead, I honestly thought it was going to be a quick trip to Lily's house and back. I didn't realize how dire I needed my stuff until now. I shook my head and stood up, thinking of what else I could use instead.
I made it over to Lily's room quickly and searched through her drawers, not finding what I was looking for, but something close enough. I held up her laminated white college I.D card and made my way back to her mom's door. It slipped between the cracks of the lock mechanism, pushing it inward away from each other and lightly unlocking for me. "Yes. Score." I fist pumped in the air and then with a smile, slipped inside.
Lily's mom's room was unusually small and tidy; it had a small wooden desk with tons of paperwork on it but neatly put together. The rest of the bedroom came with a king sized bed with velvet red blankets and in the corner of the room was a private bathroom for her.
I scratched my head, wondering what she possibly hid in here that she would lock even away from her own daughter.
I wandered in the room a bit more and looked over the desk. There was a letter in beautiful cursive handwriting half finished with the pen next to it. A white envelope was underneath it and I curiously picked up the letter, skimming over it.
"Dear Son,
Hope all is well. Both Lily and I miss you dearly and know you're only doing what's best for our country but there is no shame in coming home to spend your life with the rest of the family too. I worry about losing you everyday and I couldn't bear it if we lost you too. Please reconsider and come home soon. Also, thank you for the "weaponry" but it's not needed. I will be sending it back to you since it will be of more use to you. Don't forget to..."
It ended there.
Hm? Weaponry? What did she mean by that? I glanced at the small envelope and it was addressed to "Takashi." This must be for Lily's brother, the one she mentioned that was in the army.
Looking around the entire table and through two drawers, I couldn't find the thing she was planning on sending back to him. I turned while scratching my head and started to go look in her bathroom before my foot kicked into something, sending it across the floor and under the bed. When I bent down to bring it back to me, it turned out to be a small brown packaged box with tape sealed down the middle. I brought out my keys and used one of them to slice through it to open it. My breath caught in my throat and my eyes went wide when I saw what was inside it. A pistol with a clip filled with bullets.
"I knew it." I grinned, pulling it out and admiring the silver weapon. This is definitely what I meant. Something that gave us the upper hand against those freaks so we didn't have to run and hide all the time.
But...
I never actually used one before in my life.
I've seen them countless times on T.V. and seen cops use them but I never actually seen one up close or even hold one in my hand. I gathered both the bullets and gun in my hand, looking at it at all different angles like a caveman first discovering a rock. I had no idea how these things worked.
Either way, I'll take this with us and figure it out later.
I ran back down the stairs quickly and quietly, almost slipping on my socks on the way down before stuffing them inside Ray's bag and burying it underneath his jacket so he couldn't see them. I will have to stop him at every opportunity I get if he ever tries to go through it. He would flip if he saw that I had this. Especially if he knew I broke into the room to get it. When I was settled back in the blanket, I looked over at Ray who was rolled over the other way. I let out a sigh of relief and pulled the blanket up over my head before drifting to sleep.
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