‘What am I doing right now? Why am I doing this anyway?’ I ask myself that question as I am pulled out of the entrance of yet another clothes store. This was honestly infuriating. At this point I was wondering why anyone would want a girlfriend. All they do is make you spend money on them, and you really can’t get laid unless you two are ready to get married. I don’t think I’ll ever find myself a lover. At least not as far as I can see into my future.

“Sorry for making you do all this, I understand she can be a bit of a hassle.” A voice behind me snaps me out of my musings.

I turn and look at my friend Riley. It’s his girlfriend that has been so pushy. Or pully. Either one is fine, although the second one fits the situation more. Ah! Sorry, got off track there. Riley has been my best friend since middle school. I say best, but there weren’t exactly a lot of people to choose from. I was always more of a loner in school. I preferred working alone. I would almost say I’m unsociable, but I don’t exactly hate people to the point where I despise the human race(The fact that Riley is still with me proves that).

Riley had always been a great friend, despite my avoidance of a social life. Somehow this man was always an unconscious player. He didn’t receive many love letters or confessions, but girls would always listen to him and blush when he complimented them. The gossip network of girls would be 75% rumors about him, yet he never seemed to notice. That thick head of his would be able to stop basically anything in this world, no matter what it was. I think that was what got him on such good terms with me, that rock solid skull of his. He never once got my subtle messages to go away, eventually I accepted him though. He got his girlfriend in his last year of high school, now they even go to the same university. I’m still in university by the way, except I go somewhere different.

Because this idiot still doesn’t understand the concept of going on a date with just a significant other, he brought me along. I don’t know his girlfriend much, all I know is that her name is Alice and he was the one who asked her out. Despite being a huge leech on money, she seems nice, I understand why he would like her. She’s cute too, and almost as thickheaded as him. Almost. No one can reach his level.

Thankfully, this was the last stop that she decided to make before going home to look at all her new clothes. After this, they plan to go on a lunch date and finally to the new amusement park that just opened up yesterday. Before they head off to lunch is when I plan to ditch them. Don’t worry man, you’ll thank me later when you two get closer because of this. If that ever happens, considering that they’re both denser than a black hole.

“Yeah, no problem. It’s better this way, I don’t want you to lose all your money to this girl.” I say as we pass through the doors to the parking garage.

“Hey!” Riley snaps. “She’s not that bad! Alice is nice and cares for other people. Unlike you.”

I laugh and shrug my shoulders, which is rather hard with the amount of bags I’m being forced to carry. Riley smiles as well and turns back towards Alice, who is currently at the other side of the crosswalk, beckoning for us to catch up. I sigh and shake my head. That girl is too energetic for me. Where does she get all that energy? I guess I’ll never know.

As I step out onto the road, I hear a loud and long honk to my left and quickly turn towards it.

...What?

Is that…?

Me and Riley are both right in the way of a semi charging at us full speed. My head snaps back to my front, where Riley is. He’s petrified. Fear in the headlights. Glad I’m not like that. I take one, big jump forward, and push him out the way. I doubt he’d actually make it out of the way in time, but hey, I’d prefer not to take my best friend with me to the afterlife. Or whatever comes after life. Guess that’s why its called the afterlife.

The semi is already here. Damn its fast. Haaah…

Is this how it ends?

The semi doesn’t stop. Its inches away from me.

Seems this is how it ends.

Goodbye. Cruel world.

The semi hits me and I’m sent flying.

Argh!

*Clang*

SHIT!!

*Thud*

ACK!

Is this… the ground?

Ugh…

I’m still rolling…

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck! Fuck! FUCK!

I can’t begin to describe the pain I’m in. It hurts like all hell. I can’t move any part of my body.

“…! …!”

Who…?

I can hear someone yelling. But who?

Ah. It sounds male. Maybe its Riley? Yeah, hopefully he didn’t die.

I, on the other hand, am rather happy to die. Just not painfully. I didn’t really have a future to look forward to. Just repeats. Days repeat. My life would’ve just been a circle.

Urgh!

Throat!

I cough up some blood.

I can’t breathe anymore.

I can’t see…

Seems I’m… dying for real.

Should I say something?

Some cool final words?

Nah, I’m not one for that kind of stuff. I’ll just die quietly. Not like I can speak anyway. My lungs probably ruptured or something like that. My organs are probably all squashed by the impact. There goes my organ donor status. Not like I care what happens to me after death. I won’t be there to care either way.

A weak and bitter smile forms on my face before I finally leave this world.

Don’t be sad, you’ll just forget about it later on when you start getting to the real action. Besides, these two didn’t exactly have lots of character development. You’ll probably cry buckets later on when… oops, shouldn’t spoil the future story. Got to have some surprises for you.

…

Oh. Wait a minute. I’m just talking to myself, satisfying my own desire to be in a fiction novel that is actually well written, unlike the ones I used to write, those were terrible. Don’t know why people liked it.

Well, they’ll never have anymore chapters, seeing as how I’m dead.

What the hell?

Where is my next life? Where is that common fantasy reincarnation. Well, I don’t really care about what happens to me, but isn’t something supposed to happen? Reincarnation, resurrection, traveling down the river of souls, meeting gods? SOMETHING? HELLO? ANYONE?!?!

...

Nothing answers. Was I expecting someone to answer? I guess I was, seeing how disappointed I feel. But seriously, I’m bored. Do I need to think something specific to specify what’s going to happen to me next? Like where I get resurrected or reincarnated or really anything?

I’m so confused.

...

Fine, I concede.

‘I wish… I had the chance… to be omnipotent, so I can… protect those close to me...But, it seems… that this is the end. Is that true…? Then so be it...’

Oh god, even when I’m dead, that’s so embarrassing. I’m old enough to stop thinking that what I wish will actually come true, I know what reality is and that I am eternally bound by its metaphorical chains. Argh!! I need to be more realistic, there is no way something like that will…

Actually…

Wor… k…

What?

That seriously worked?

I can see…? What is this? It’s… amazing...

“Whoa...” I uttered.

There is no better words to use. Its too shocking. Suddenly seeing the entire universe as though it is a part of you. There are no other words to describe it. I feel something from above me, if above is the right words, there really is no such thing for me right now. I don’t know what exactly it is, but it feels… majestic, glorious, overpowering, urbane. The very definition of something you should bow to. Something, a voice, reaches to me from that amazing aura.

“SHIT! I FUCKED UP!!”

Well. That was… unexpected. It sounds really worried. To be accompanied by such a voice, if that aura had a consciousness, it would probably be embarrassed for being related to such a voice. I suddenly have the urge to laugh. All the power the aura was previously exerting on me was now gone. I ‘blink’ in surprise as information fills my head.

“NONONONONONONONONONOOOOOOOOOO!!!”

That voice is someone called ‘God’, but isn’t really? The info I’m getting is really confusing…

“FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUUUUUUUUUUCK!”

Apparently there are multiple people like him, but he is the most supreme.

“DAMN IIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTT!”

‘God’ can destroy and create nearly any universe as many times as he wants. Truly, he was indeed worthy of that previous aura.

“I’M SUCH A SHAME, I DON’T KNOW HOW TO FIX THIIIIIIIIIISSSSS!!!”

...You’re really not helping me out here.

“Oh wait!”

Huh? He seems to have though of something.

“I just have to kill him before he can control all of the qi in this universe! Good job me!”

NO!

I don’t care who you are, but I suddenly have much more attachment to life. So I’m going to have to stop you right there!

“NO!” I shout.

Huh?… Wait, I can speak now?! Since when?!

“Wait, you’re speaking...” ‘God’ said. Seems he’s as shocked as me.

“Yes, yes I am.” If I had my glasses, I would’ve pushed them up my nose to sound scholarly.

“NOOOOOOOO, it’s already too late to kill you then! DAMN IT ALL!”

Well, I’m getting surprised lots of times today.

“No wait, I got it!”

Seems he’s back to talking to himself.

“If I just reduce his control to a single planet and limit him to just that planet, then I can do this! Yes! Alright, time to send him to...”

He wants to trap me? I honestly don’t mind as long as I’m still alive at this point. But…

He’s taking forever to think of a place!

“AH! Yes, the planet Nephila is the place where he could be held the longest. It’s not like he has a lifespan anymore, so I’ll have to continually trap him in different planets until that universe implodes.”

Oi, did I just hear something worrying?

“I guess it’s as they say!”

As who say?

“Try reincarnation...”

Wait... Isn’t that a meme?

“It’ll be fun!”

It is a meme!

“Off to Nephila you go young man! Or should I say young woman?! Hahahahahaha! I am indeed a genius!”

“I’m sorry, what was that?!”

What about a woman? What are you talking about ‘God’? Are you changing my gender? Don’t do that, you bastard!!

WAIT!

NOOOOOOOO!

This feels really weird!

But at least it doesn’t hurt.

Well, goodbye boring life, hello new body! Is what the anime protagonists would say in this situation. I’m more worried about what he meant about me being a woman. Was he just not sure about my gender? Please don’t let me be a woman after this!