《Demonology For Morons》Silky Smooth Voice
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I slowly push myself up off the floor and open my eyes. Eyes? Push? I HAVE EYES! I HAVE ARMS! It’s to bright this is nothing like the unending darkness. AHH I fall back down and cry out in pain holding my eyes when I hear the most beautiful and compelling voice say words that mean more to me than even my own life.
“Stop that and get up you stupid worthless imp, you’ll mess up my summoning circle!” (Voice)
I instantly stop and get back up and look for the owner who said those awe inspiring words that’ll I’ll engrave into my heart for the rest of eternity. There he is in all his glory! He’s like a giant towering over me wearing an amazing black cloak that hides his face. Some might call it creepy or pathetic due to the bloodstains and the tears and holes in it, but not me. No I can see that those tears just show how hard working and diligent he is that he probably just doesn’t have time to change. If I could just see his glorious face just one time I can die satisfied maybe if I just reach up and brush the hood off…
MOTHERFUCKER HE HIT ME WITH HIS STICK! I’LL KILL THIS BROKE PIECE OF SHIT!
“Don’t touch me disgusting imp go pick up a pick axe and mine the wall with the others. If you don’t know how just mimic them.”(Summoner)
YES MASTER! As I grab on of the picks, that are almost as large as I am, and go to look for whatever these others are. Master didn’t really say what they are. Not because he forgot, master is far too perfect to do something like forgetting, he’s probably just far too busy to tell me. Or maybe it’s because I’m too much of a stupid and worthless imp to understand. What’s an imp?
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Well it’s probably not important. The only thing that’s important is finding the others and doing what they’re doing as my wonderful master commands! Wait why does something feel wrong about this?
Oh look there they are. Ewww they’re all bald with long pointy ears, red skin, and glowing red eyes. Not to mention there all smaller than the pickaxes that there swinging they look so disgusting and ridiculous. Hold on. There smaller than there picks and master said the others so that means…
DON’T LOOK AT YOUR ARMS. Whatever you do just ignore that random thought after all you cant be whatever disgusting….
Didn’t master call me disgusting…
I would cry if I wasn’t so busy mining as per masters orders.
Str +1
Well it could probably be worse after all I could be the idiots next to me that are mindlessly swing there picks at the cave wall. They probably didn’t get to be touched by masters stick, I pity them. Also they’re not the hero of the dark blob. That’s right I’m the hero I can’t waste time here mining I have to go and kill that FUCKING LIGHT THAT ATE ME! Hold the phone. What’s a phone?
Let’s work this out. First I got eaten by that light. Second I appeared before master. Third he told me, a hero, to do this menial labor. Not that I mind after all I’d do anything for master. No stop focus! Am I forgetting anything else important? “You’ll mess up my summoning circle”
….
Int +1
THAT SON OF A…
A loud noise goes off next to and I turn to look in time to see one of the other imps get crushed by a rock that fell from the ceiling due to all the mining. All the imps stop working to look at the imp that’s now just a puddle of blood under a rock.
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“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA”
LOOK AT IT THERES BLOOD EVERYWHERE! The look on the other imps faces are great. They have an even dumber look than usual.
“HAHAHAHAHA”
“GET BACK TO WORK! AND YOU STOP LAUGHING OR I’LL CRUSH YOU TO!”(summoner)
Yes master!
*****************
Do you ever feel like you forgot something really important but you can’t think of what it was?
Str: +1
Mining increased to Level 2
Well let’s think of what it was. I met master, learned I was an disgusting, worthless, and stupid imp. Anything else? Hmmm… I learned to mine I guess.
I wonder if there’s another way I can make master happy other than the slightly shinier rock. Oh I can maybe show him that unique ability maybe master will be more happy learning about himself. No I’m sure master knows all there is to know. He is master after all. Maybe it’ll tell me something I forgot that I could show master! Unique ability activate!
Name:Hidden Age: 1day Race: Demon(Lesser Imp) Hp 10/10 Mp: N/A Tittle:Self Proclaimed Hero Str: 8 Int: 8 Agi: 3 Wis: 4 Skills: see more End:2
An Enslaved Lesser Imp that thinks its a hero.
What's next an Angel calling itself The Demon Lord?
THE FUCK? I AM A HERO! I AM THE HERO WHO WILL DESTROY THE LIGHT AND IT’S NOT SELF PROCLAIMED! LOOK AT MY UNIQUE ABILITY! ENSLAVED MY ASS! IM JUST DOING THIS BECAUSE MASTER….
Int +1
THAT SON OF A BITCH!
Woah déjà vu. Why does it feel like I…..
Wis +1
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I’LL KILL HIM!!!!
Ok calm down. I know lets mine that’ll calm me down and make master happy… FUCK!
Ok I think now we know the source of the light was probably masters summoning circle and he uses it to bring us away from the dark and here to force us to work. How do I make this stop? Easy kill him, but how do I kill him? I mean I know how I would like to for leading me on like that with his seductive voice that makes me want to…. NO don’t think about the voice! Next time he walks by I’m gonna take this pickaxe and…. No I can’t do that. Master said not to touch him and I wouldn’t want to disappoint him like that.
FUCK!
Hmmmm… what else can I do? OH I know exactly how I’m going to handle this.
Int +1
Wis +2
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