NAME:

Joat

TITLES:

The Social Butterfly, Goblin Slayer, Magically Able, Orphan Leader, Novice Adventurer, Uncaringly Keen One (E), Learned, Unknown Fugitive®, Corpse Looter, Swindler(E), Exquisite being, Fast Leveler

Class:

None

Race:

Hobgoblin

Gender

Male

Level

11(+3)

Experience

36%

Alignment:

Neutral Evil

Global Reputation:

-3

Adventurer Rank:

Stone

-

-

STATUS:

Remaining points (55(+3)), 1 Raid Badge, 1 Area Event Badge(Dekin Nation)

Health Points:

110/110

HP regen (out of combat)

1/sec

Stamina Points:

20/20

Stamina regen (out/in combat)

2/0.2 per second

Attack:

41-41

Defense:

0

Perception:

50

Darkness(E):

8

Brutality(E):

20

Luck:

20

Stamina:

20

Endurance(E):

10

Vitality:

10

Empty:

-

Agility:

10

Empty:

-

Satiety:

180/180 (Full)

Unused Stats:

Dexterity, Communication(+15), Wisdom(+6), Leadership(+10), Eloquency,(+5) Intelligence(+6), Mana(+1), Flexibility, Light(E), Strength

Permanent Effects:

Larva Scent (Debuff)(1)

SKILLS/PROFICIENCIES:

Active:

Bartering, beginner [lvl1] {Trade}

Bite, intermediate [lv1]

Cannibalize, beginner [lvl1] {Dark}

-sub-skill: Self-cannibalise

Catch, beginner [lvl1]

Climb, beginner [lvl2]

Commanding shout, beginner [lv6]

Crawling, beginner [lvl1]

Diplomacy, beginner [lvl1]

Dodge, beginner [lvl3]

Grapple, beginner [lvl2]

Headbutt, beginner [lv3]

Hold-Your-Breath, beginner [lvl2]

Jump, beginner [lv2]

Massaging, beginner [lvl1]

Monster Identification, beginner [lv8]

Reading, beginner [lvl5]

Roll, beginner [lv4]

Sacrifice, beginner [lvl1]

Spitful taunt, beginner [lv 4]

Sprint, beginner [lv9]

Sneak, intermediate [lv1] {counter-perception}

Stomp, beginner [lv3]

Suicide, beginner [lv2]

Swim, beginner [lvl2]

Throw, beginner [lv2]

Tracking, beginner [lvl2]

Writing, beginner [lvl5]

Passive:

Fire resistance, beginner [lvl2]

Hearing, beginner [lv4]

Lucky roll, beginner [lvl1]

Mana adept, beginner [lvl1]

Night Vision, Master [lvMax]

Pain tolerance, beginner [lvl4]

Smell, beginner [lv2]

Auras:

Aura of Darkness, beginner [lvl3] {Dark}

Aura of Light, beginner [lvl1] (disabled) {Light}

Mild Monster’s Aura, intermediate [lv2]

Crafting:

Proficiencies:

Dance Mastery, beginner [lvl2]

-style: salsa, beginner [lvl1]

-style: breakdance, beginner [lvl1]

Kick Mastery, beginner [lv4]

Unarmed Mastery, beginner [lv1]

SPELLS:

Detect magic, beginner [lvl2]

Languages

Dekin, beginner [lvl5]

Holy mother of Aiag has it been a while since I’ve looked at my character sheet. Last time I swear I was a puny level 5 with 2 maybe 3 titles, but now, I’m a plethoratic individual indeed!

After getting the Swindler and Accomplice title, apparently the accomplice and swindler title just bonded together to mame it even more likely for someone to choose me for things. Well if its’ for skills, I don’t really mind.

But ah it feels so good to have such a number of skills, only a few more until I’ve pretty much got everything we’ve talked about in the meetings, I’m so excited!

Right anyways, after scrunching my eyes at the madly high level and also the fact that I got an Exquisite being title for having more than 5 exquisite things in my character screen made me quite happy. I am indeed an exquisite being.

Though it’s going to get even better now that I’m loaded with 25 gold and no idea where to spend it…

Oh god there’s more notifications (I haven’t had time to look at them since trudging through sewage and then washing off, I quite literally went straight into swindling someone. I feel like a bad person…but the money makes me feel slightly better. Anywho) and after finding out I hadn’t looked at any of literally dozens of levelling notifications, my head hurts slightly now.

Congratulations, by being the first player on this server to get to level 10 you have gained a title

TITLE: Fast leveler

You are naturally better at levelling than normal people.

This title gives some in-game bonuses

Decreases xp needed to level up by 10%

Xp increases by 25%

…

..

.

Well that is mildly broken…I only need 90% to level up now, sweet!!

Right one last notification,

Congratulations, you reached level 10! You have reached a Milestone!

When reaching a milestone you may save your current character in your soul storage.

Current space in soul storage: 1 (empty)

Would you like to save your character: YES/NO

…

..

.

FINALLLY YESSSSSSSSSS!!! No more starting from freaking scratch every time!!

Oh this really makes things slightly better…now I can level up my suicide skill without a worry (well I’ve got no reason to but if I did it’d be a good time to do it).

Hey everyone, guess what. Level 10 has a milestone!

Sharing that on the village chat gets everyone buzzing and while I watch the maddened frenzy of replies, I have a quick look at everyone’s levels: the lowest is level 5 and the highest level 8…wait no level 9, Thrash somehow.

Well hopefully by the end of the week people could get close to level 7 if not past it, I mean all former squad are level 6 lowest so that’s already making me feel happy.

Right…what should I do with the rest of my day? I mean the plan is to learn whatever I can in 6 days now but crafting takes too long so that’s off the list (even if it is free) so what else is there to learn that takes little time?

“Hey Joat” An alligator-beastlady, Allie(?), interrupts my musing and happily saunters over to me. “What are you up to?”

“Ah just wondering what to do”

“Come join me in the Battle district, there’s actual weapon training there” She sounds really excited…well I guess anyone would be since if we get weapons we no longer need to punch things to death.

…

..

.

Eh why not, I really don’t have anything better to do (plus now that I’ve got money no need to find the weird hobo priest, yet).

Standing up and following her out, I ask her about how her first day went.

“Oh well everyone buggered off to do their own thing so…I just got really drunk...” she looks out into the distance with a semi-regretful visage “And had to pay the tab too”

“wasn’t it only like 5 coppers for some ale?” Hah I sound like a pompous rich man, maybe because I am!

“When you’re drinking with 4 others…” oh “but apparently they liked my vigour and stories so really it was only half the tab that they had me pay”

“How much was it though?”

“…2 silvers” Oh that’s a lot of ale they drank sheesh, and that was half?

“But aren’t we all broke? How did you pay?”

“Well thanks to you, I paid it off” Oh so that’s why she was so vigorous this morning (well like about an hour ago). “But not everyone’s broke, I mean Tikari’s got 1 gold I think which in all fairness is a lot of alcohol”

“Yes, that’d be a lot” Maybe the adventurer’s guild doesn’t have that much or maybe they’ve just got more expensive and better ales to pay the cost (or we’re luckily in a cheap zone).

“But on the bright side I got the Alcoholic title” she only looks half embarrassed at that

Well I guess for xp it’d be good so I’m definitely inclined to hear more about that. Before I can ask her though we reach a large courtyard with multiple players smacking straw dolls around with a variety of wooden weapons.

“HELLO MAGGOTS” I’ve heard that voice before

Turning round, sure enough it’s the massive block of a blacksmith squeezing through the small archway that is the entrance to this courtyard. He wears nothing but a pair of bursting leather trousers decorated with a large red symbol on the left thigh.

“HELLO DAREN SIR” I responds shoutily to him, snapping to attention.

“HALF RIGHT MAGGOT, HERE I AM SIR, AND I’M YOU SUPERVISOR. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO LEARN”

“Er no sign up fee or anything?”

“not for you” He breaks his usual self slightly giving a small smile before roaring at me what I can do “ROIRRA FOR SWORD AND SHIELD, REGNAR FOR ARCHERY, I AM YOUR TWO-HANDED WEAPONS, SAM FOR ONE HANDED WEAPONRY AND PAUL FOR POLEARMS.

“So if I was to do dagge-”

“NONE OF THAT PONCY CRAP HERE, WE FIGHT LIKE HEROES NOT BACKSTABBING COWARDS EXCEPT REGNAR”

Regnar turns after clipping the back of one of the Satyr wannabe’s heads and flips Daren off, much to Darens delight.

“SO WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR, GO TO A SPOT AND GET WORKING, MAGGOTS”

“SIR YES SIR” terrified of the booming, sculpted half giant of a man, I head in the most directly away from him direction…into Regnar’s side of the courtyard (I say courtyard but it’s more like 4 put together…it could easily fit 100 people in a line).

“Ah you” The dripping latino accent pours out of his less than happy mouth…well Aiag I forgot it’s actually a she (spiritually not physically). How oddening knowledge.

“So do I call you Regnar or Roirra?”

“Regnar it’s simpler, but wait until I find Casper” he/she start seething, ah I’ll leave it as he, less confusion that way.

“So how do I shoot a bow?”

…

..

.

I mean what else am I going to do, pick up and figure it out, that usually leads to bad things happening, like me getting hurt.

“Pick up a bow” He points towards the rack near the wall. Oh no guess the universe just want to hurt me.

On the rack are about a dozen bows, and from the looks of it 3 different kinds (well heights). There’s a small bow about the length of my chest, one about double of that and one which if I put myself next to it, it’s still about a foot taller than me.

Hmm…so I guess shortbow…huntingbow? And longbow.

Well no harm trying all 3…let’s start with the average huntingbow.

WEAPON: Training HuntingBow (2-hand), beginner

+5 attack

Draw weight 14 pounds

Ok so it gave me information about it’s draw weight, cool…didn’t know it’s measured in pounds or what that means but interesting nonetheless.

Returning back to Regnar who is busy poking a familiar owl, Sino(? It’s hard to remember all these names) in the back, I cough slightly to get his attention.

He passes me a leather quiver, with a single strap going from top to bottom of the quiver.

Putting it on, he hands me a dozen arrows gives me a less than gentle shove into the line and begins instructions.

“EVERYONE COLLECT” or not in my case“Right make a diamond with your palms ontop of eachother with the target in the centre, now bring it to your eye and keep the target in sight”

Erm…it’s in the middle of my face…

“Do it again, idiot” Hey lay off the insults a little bit Regnar. Well at least it’s better than when we first met, anyways

…

..

.

And nope it’s in the middle of my face, what is this supposed to do anyways?

“Are you left or right handed?” he sighs slightly.

“Left”

“So shoot lefthanded”

Then what was the point of the weird diamond thing?

Whatevering the situation, I pick up the bow in my left hand where the leather grip it.

Mimicking Sino who’s in front of me, I stand sideways on put the back of the arrow onto the string between the two knots, raise my bow till my fist is just below the middle of the straw circle, draw my string straight back and let go

…

..

.

That was far more painful than it should’ve been…maybe it was because I don’t have the strength stat?

“That was awful” He’s not wrong, the arrow didn’t even go half way. “Right idiot, knock the arrow as you did before, raise your bow as before” I do those two things “Now turn your body this way” He forcibly moves my upper body so it’s facing Sino and not the target. “index finger above the arrow, middle and ring fingr below and elbow goes up, backwards and then flattens” He holds my arm as he smoothly draws my elbow up and back, leaving my fingers resting on the corner of my mouth. “Look at the target and let go”

*Twang*

Well that certainly made a nicer sound than before, and I could also feel my shoulders doing something…cool. Though my fingers kind of hurt and I think I’ve whacked my left forearm with the string.

“Maybe you’re not completely useless, as long as you get spoonfed the information. Do it again” Well it’s a compliment…ish.

Knocking then drawing the arrow with a raised elbow till it sits in line with the arrow and fire.

Hey I’m getting closer to the target…but I guess I need aim higher.

Aiming higher with my front arm before I draw I get a clip around the head.

“Tip your body” Regnar grabs my upper body tipping the whole thing upwards. “This line is unbroken” He traces his hand from left hand to right elbow.

Well this is going to be a lot harder than I imagined arghgh.

…

After about a lot of failed shots later, I grew decently used to shooting the hunting bow: it’s not that powerful and can be quite a fast shot as I saw the petite elf that always hangs around Braxel volley a dozen arrows in about an minute (huh well she is an elf so I expected nothing less).

I can shoot about 5 a minute and that’s making my accuracy go to absolute pot.

Well I did switch hands in the middle because my right hand started hurting from the string. I shoot as equally bad on the right side and it feels quite a bit stranger too.

With permission from Regnar (well I pointed to the rack and he nodded) I decided to grab a shortbow this time.

It’s poundage was 20 which was a bit odd considering it’s smaller than the hunting bow, but then again maybe not.

Taking it to the line, I get stopped by Regnar as if he knows I’m just going to draw it and see what happens.

“Draw as before, but this time, front arm slightly bent, and pull until the string bites and release straight away. I tell you now, your hand is going to be in the middle of the air” As if talking to a child but ok I get it.

So when drawing this bow, I have to push outward with my front hand, draw the string back and as I’m drawing it suddenly goes taut and slips past my fingers.

Well I mean that’s not exactly going to be accurate if it just fires away what kind of felt like mid draw…

Let’s have another go why don’t we

…

It’s actually really cool. Erm well how to explain it…it’s fast, really fast since there’s no way I can actually stop and hold it since it is basically mid draw for my muscles and they screamed when I tried holding it. And it’s powerful, plus it’s small so it could be easier to run around with.

I guess the only downside is the fact that accuracy isn’t exactly its strong point…

“COLLECT” passing into a number of other people’s firing lanes as I pick up my scattered arrows…yeah accuracy is definitely a problem.

Once again I did try it both ways and although my shooting really isn’t any different either way, having the bow in my left hand just feels a lot more secure.

Back to the rack, I take a longbow this time: massive thing being about a foot taller than me and the poundage is also 20.

Huh so same as the shortbow, should that be normal?

Moving back to the archery range, which is actually not as bad a place as I thought: shoot your arrows, wait till everyone’s done, go collect and start again. I slither into my spot behind Sino and in front of Nosy.

“Same as the hunting bow, draw and anchor at the corner of your mouth”

Alright let’s see how this g-

*Thwump*

Wow that felt…AWESOME.

It was like deep? Would that be the sound to describe the rumbling twang of the bow and it went into the boss dead on too!

Well that was awesome, let’s do it again!

…

Ok my fingers are bleeding, ouch, buggerations, shouldn’t have shot the longbow so much. Owww.

So longbow…awesome, fun, actually quite accurate (about the same as the hunting bow) and way more powerful than the other 2 bows (well the shortbow did sometimes reach the target but I guess it was accuracy that messed the shots up). Although it’s not exactly convenient to run with, being an almost 7 foot long stick…but that power and the sound too…oh so nice.

But no more shooting now, for I have lost skin on the fingers on both my hands and left and right forearm (apparently you hold the bow lightly so the string doesn’t rake your skin…apparently) so everything HURTS.

At least:

Congratulations! You have learnt the Proficiency: Archery

PROFICIENCY: Archery, beginner [lv1] (0%) (Active)

Archery is the ability to shoot distant targets with bows.

When used: does Bow + Arrow damage and effects

Strength bonus: n/a

Dexterity bonus: n/a

Agility bonus: 10% increased knocking rate

Flexibility bonus: n/a

Cost: None, Duration: sustained, Cooldown: None

For learning a new proficiency, xp is increased by 5%

I also got the 3 styles (shortbow, hunting bow and longbow) which didn’t give me anything but xp at the moment

I’m happy…only took…errrr 4 hours, well nevermind, no wonder my fingers are hurting like hell. But I did gain a level in pain tolerance too!

Thanking Regnar, he snorts slightly at my happiness before getting everyone back into practicing.

Leaving the courtyard, I go into the market stalls and buy some fresh fruit for lunch…mmm delicious, apart from the multiple specks of blood that escape my fingers and soil my food, but eh it’s my blood so what’s the matter.

*ding*

Cannibalism increased a level

Seriously game?

Back to training let’s go!

Erm..hrmm what do I do next.

The courtyard is actually pretty full about now, I’d say close to 200 people, which is mildly surprising, but I guess Npc’s do this as well.

The archery lot seemed to have mostly changed, with a few more fanatical ones (like the petite blonde elf) staying and shooting, blood dripping down their fingers. Eugh, stop being so crazy you people.

Hmm question is, who do I want to be insulted by the most? Or do I try on of the other Npc instructors I haven’t met before…

Lets try my luck (I’ve got 20 come on universe) with Sam.

The man called Sam looks like a chipper fellow with a lean body and muscular arms (rather oxymoronic but it’s ok skipping ab day), short black hair and a friendly smile.

“Hello there are you here for one handed training?”

“Yes, is it possible to try them all?”

“Do you even know how many one handed weapons we have here?”

“Erm there’s only 3?” swords, axes and maces right? All the one-handed weapons are based on those weapons types

“Correct!” He sounds rather thrilled “Now which would you like to experience first” Something about his way too friendly smile and the word experience jolted me…oh and the anguished looking face of Lefty and Righty as they come out of the a rectangular building, veering far away from Sam didn’t help.

“Maces” Because I’d rather have my bones broken then be amputated…well if I had the choice I’d pick neither but as the universe doesn’t like me.

“Absolutely fantastic. I quite like maces, oh the sounds of cracking bones in the morning really wakes you up” He quickly directs me to the weapons rack on his side of the courtyard and shows me the 3 types of maces with a rather…disturbing expression “We’ve got hammers for when crushing bones like flour to are the most important thing, clubs for when you like a good crunching but you want to see the blood too, and finally flails for when your opponent tries to run away and you need that extra reach, or you just want to break their neck, oh” he shudders delightfully at probably some very disturbing memory.

Well… choosing between flattening, crunching (not a good word), and something that sounds more akin to a torture device than a weapon…let’s start with the hammer…since it doesn’t seem that bad.

WEAPON: Training Hammer, (hand) beginner

Attack 10-15 (blunt)

Well I mean there’s nothing bad about it I guess, slightly heavy, but it’d do the job I guess.

“Right now go to bashing up those poor little straw men, imagine their bones splintering with each strike, head squashing and bursting like a ripe melon” His eyes roll back quivering slightly. O…k let’s try and ignore the images and lets beat up some straw dummies.

Erm, do I have a proper way of swinging it or is it just a swing and see? Well swing and see sounds like a good enough start.

…

That was a rather dulling session of hitting about a straw dummy in the courtyard with all the 3 different types of mace. The hammer was light, good for quick thumping but it really only did damage with the front and not the rest of it. The spiked club was better in that regard since I could it the dummy with any side, but it weighed quite a bit more. Although the winner for maces was definitely the flail. Oh my was it cool. Apart from being able to spin the mace head which when it hits, hits hard, the chain could be used to wrap around the straw dummy at places, like the neck.

Kind of worrying but also really cool.

Though I guess the downside was it was a lot of heavy swinging in the end which was exhausting, oh my Aiag is flailing exhausting.

I did move on to the axes, where also there were 3 types (seems like this is a thing): Flat axes, war axes and double-headed axes. The flat axes were axe-heads without a curved blade. It didn’t mean anything but I’m sure there is a difference between that and the war axe that I just haven’t seen yet. The war axe was the same as the flat axe, albeit larger and heavier and a curved axe head. The double headed axes, well it’s just two war axe heads on one stick…kind of useful I guess? If you didn’t have time to change the position of your axe. But then again just means someone can push that side to you.

All in all I wasn’t impressed with the axes, and more swinging, not fun.

The swords however were not that much swinging (well relatively): the 5 swords that were available were Rapier, a traditional medival-european swords (so shotsword, longsword and broadsword) and a scimitar. So Rapier was light and a lot of stabbing, quite enjoyed that. The traditional swords were a mixture of stabbing and hacking, I mean I can see why they were preferred over axes and maces and the like. The scimitar was a tad bit strange, because it’s curved, which makes stabbing rather awkward…until I figured out that because of the curve I can actually stab it in the side while standing in front of it…rather cool, but awkward.

And I got all the delicious skills and subskills for them all! It also came with the overall one-handed mastery too!

Congratulations! You have learnt the Proficiency: One-handed Mastery

PROFICIENCY: One-handed Mastery, beginner [lv1] (55%) (Passive)

You are mastering the use of a weapon wielded by a single hand

Strength bonus: n/a

Dexterity bonus: n/a

Agility bonus: 10% increased attack rate

Flexibility bonus: n/a

Cost: None, Duration: sustained, Cooldown: None

For learning a new proficiency, xp is increased by 5%

Congratulations! You have learnt the Proficiency: Mace Mastery

PROFICIENCY: Mace Mastery, beginner [lv1] (0%) (Passive)

It is simple to wield a blade, but to master it is another thing.

Strength bonus: n/a

Dexterity bonus: n/a

Agility bonus: 10% increased attack rate

Flexibility bonus: n/a

Cost: None, Duration: sustained, Cooldown: None

For learning a new proficiency, xp is increased by 5%

Congratulations! You have learnt the Proficiency: Axe Mastery

PROFICIENCY: Axe Mastery, beginner [lv1] (0%) (Passive)

It is simple to wield a blade, but to master it is another thing.

Strength bonus: n/a

Dexterity bonus: n/a

Agility bonus: 10% increased attack rate

Flexibility bonus: n/a

Cost: None, Duration: sustained, Cooldown: None

For learning a new proficiency, xp is increased by 5%

Congratulations! You have learnt the Proficiency: Sword Mastery

PROFICIENCY: Sword Mastery, beginner [lv1] (0%) (Passive)

It is simple to wield a blade, but to master it is another thing.

Strength bonus: n/a

Dexterity bonus: n/a

Agility bonus: 10% increased attack rate

Flexibility bonus: n/a

Cost: None, Duration: sustained, Cooldown: None

For learning a new proficiency, xp is increased by 5%

Lots of delicious xp. Now to try some other thin-

“Are you done warming up?” oh no “Good pick your favourite weapon and let’s go inside”

I pick up the flail and the scimitar…and Sam

…

..

.

Is smiling?

“A scimitar, exceptional in it’s ability to continually and deeply slice one section of a body due to it’s shape and brutal when pierced inside too. AND a flail, the deadliest mace with the biggest head. Oh you are quite the greedy thing aren’t you taking both weapons to play with” Please stop creepily smiling, I don’t want to know what you’re dreaming of…

He leads me insi-

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”

…

..

.

Yeah nope.

My tshirt collar is held by one maniacal Sam as he continues to half drag me inside and towards the screaming straw dummies.

…Yes screaming straw dummies

NAME: Straw Person [lvl5]

Hp 50/50

Living Straw equipped with immunity to physical damage and pain receptors

Well this is dar-

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” One screams right into my face as a quivering Dirra, stabs it with a spear, her screams racing the tears down her eyes.

“Stab harder girl, can you not still hear yourself, only when his screams silence yours will you be free to go” …I really don’t want to be here right now…please let me disappear and not have to face screaming straw men.

MANDATORY QUEST: Desentisization

Sam is forcing you to fight the screaming straw dummies until you can face their screams without hesitation

There is no time limit on the quest but until you cannot leave this room until the quest is complete.

Rewards:

Freedom

???

Universe I hate you.

Staying away from the sobbing Dirra, because of last time we were together, I direct myself to another screaming straw man, with a familiar punk-like rabbit-beastman. Hino.

Edging towards him as he darts around the straw man swiping at it with his war axe before embedding a rapier into the head, eliciting more of a wail than just a simple scream, I kind of don’t want to get closer but he does look a lot less disabled than the people here.

Or he’s psychotic…which reminds me, he was jailed for being out late at night too…so what was he doing out there?

Suddenly suspicions arise…but then again the worst that can happen to me is getting pke’d so it’d be worth learning how he’s so calm about the screaming.

“Hey Hino” my voice is drowned out by the horrendous wailing emanating from the straw person.

Though he spots me and stops attacking, causing a seriously shocking silence to come from the straw person barely seconds after getting hacked and slashed.

“Joat why are you here?” no hi?

“Yeah I made a bad decision”

He shrugs his shoulders and continues fighting.

Wait I was going to …ah nevermind, I’ll figure it out myself then.

I take the empty straw person next to him (there are a lot of free straw men quite literally everywhere in this cavernous room) and start with some saber work.

Stabbing and slashing the screaming straw with my saber, I start swinging my flail with my other hand, rotating the head in a small circle building up speed.

Finally I reach a good speed, retreat my saber and whip the flail down onto the straw person.

STATUS: Broken Eardrums

You eardrums have been broken due to close proximity with too loud a sound for hobgoblin ears.

-80% hearing, disorientation

I mean that isn’t a bad thing given the circumstances.

Getting back into my saber attacking, my world immediately lurches to the side as I move. Aaand my face is on the stone floor with the world spinning about randomly around me.

Well I guess I know what disorientation feels like, blimming heck it’s not easy to stand back up like this.

The world doesn’t want to stay in the same place so any of my stumbling attacks are wildly everywhere. But I see Hino stabbing his just fine, how does he do it!?!

After a while…a long while, I get used to the disorientation and some of my attacks start landing and I stop stumbling as much even if the earth suddenly lurches to one side. Continuing my saber striking while building up a flail attack for a long while, I change hands to try it out but I do find my left hand more comfortable with a saber.

The status of broken eardrums actually turns to deafness as time passes. And although I have to readjust mightily to the disorientation the screaming is finally gone. Only an odd vibration in the air really tells me there is screaming afoot.

Smacking the straw person, which is only mentally terrifying as I can imagine but not hear the wailing, I feel rather finished and as soon as I stop smacking it about I get a quest finished window rewarding me with my freedom.

No dual wielding skill yet though…well I don’t blame the system: I didn’t exactly use the weapons together.

Retreating from that room and leaving Hino to continually fight with his strawman, almost gleefully, I walk straight past the courtyard, actually recognizing the signs of recent trauma on many people, and find something to eat at the market.

Luckily hand gestures are a thing so it only took some work to get myself some roasted meat sticks of some kind.

Cost me a few coppers but mmm is it worth it.

After satiating myself and regaining my hearing, I’m back to the courtyard, as I’ve got at least one more thing to learn before night falls hopefully.

Hmm, should I go polearms, two handed weapons or have a shield?

Polearms it is, might as well stay away from the loud Daren and the other latino who seems to hate me for no particular reason (forgetting the fact that I burnt down their whole village).

Heading over to the right hand side of the lower courtyard, a burly, sweating man with a clean scalp and a thick handlebar moustache blubbers out commands infrequently to the small mass of a few dozen people who smack eachother with long sticks in a ragged line.

“Ah a new recruit” His eyes glint expectantly “grab a pole and get into the line” He motions towards a pile of thick, long sticks in the corner.

1-2 damage, well that’s comforting.

Joining one of the two lines, I end up next to Allie who looks rather battered.

“Joat nice to see you join the line”

“Recruits advance!” Paul blurts out from the sidelines.

With no chance for conversation, I walk in concord with the 20+ person line (I don’t recognize many people here) and stop a small distance away from the enemy.

So stab them with the blunt end (there isn’t a pointy end)? Seems like it’s the right thing to do as poles start being thrusted back and forth, the dull sound of wood on flesh accompanied with pained exclamations accompanying the small battle.

The tall, young human in front of me gives me a snarl before thwacking me in the stomach with his pole.

-2 ow you little bugger.

Stepping forward to get in reach, I thrust forward, lightly tapping him on the shoulder

-2 -2 -2 -2 -2 -2 ow ow ow

Immediately beaten up from either side I retreat back into the line. Well that’s one way to learn moving out of line is a really bad idea.

“Disengage” Somehow Pauls voice lures over the slight din of combat and everyone disengages, taking a few steps back.

“You got one hit in, better than most first timers” Allie gives me a toothy smile.

But at what cost? Multiple bruises seems like the answer.

“By the way, why are you training for polearms? Wouldn’t DillyDally prefer you all to have shortarms?” Just a guess because of his fighting style.

“Nah he actually told us the opposite: polearms are number one priority to learn” Oh that’s odd? But then again if he had his entire squad in a line like this…it could be pretty effective.

“Engage” Ah no more bruising please.

Against the same snarling human I fare pretty badly, getting rammed to bruising in multiple locations.

“Disengage”

“So where are the rest of Squad Animal?”

“They all got the polearm proficiency a while ago, so they’re busy pissing about in the field or something” She doesn’t sound to happy about being left out “And I’m here still trying to bloody learn it”

“Wait you’ve been here 2 days learning it?”

“Yes” She hisses “Everyone here is so bloody tall with long bloody arms, unlike me” snarling at her own quite stumpy arms, I see the problem quite clearly.

“…How many hits have you dealt?”

“…5” I’m assuming that’s in total because she sounds utterly depressive when saying it.

“Maybe you’re just not meant for this”

“No, I’ve already been through hell training with them so I can do everything they can, including bloody polearms!”

“Engage”

She takes two steps out of line, getting literally pummeled by half a dozen poles as she tries to stab the person in front, pole just a bit short off his stomach.

Well that explains why she looks so battered…

“Disengage”

“Right, how about this, instead of walking, we charge into the line and ram them with the poles?” I mean that should get her close enough to hit them?

“Tried it, didn’t work so well”

“Well that’s by yourself right?”

She squints her eyes curiously at me.

I tap the person to her left, some random human.

“Hey fellow, you want to come charge with us next round?”

“And get the crap beaten out of me, you must be kidding Monster” Wow, people really do not like me.

“I’ll make it worth your while” I whisper with a flashing smile and a silver coin.

“….Charging sounds like a good plan” Well people may hate me, but everyone loves money.

“Engage”

Walking up to the engagement line, I nod and the 3 of us charge out immediately feeling poles smack into my upper jaw, shoulder and thigh, stopping my movement.

-2 -2 -2

“RAHHHH” Blood splatters onto my face and I turn to see Allie blitzing the guy infront of me, feet trampling her previous and now unconscious foe: blood and vomit dripping out his mouth.

*Splat*

She may suck at normal polearm fighting, but close range her stumpy arms move the pole a lot faster and more precise. Don’t get into close range combat with Allie.

Within less than half a minute, the entire right hand side (my right) of the enemy line has collapsed with a few people dropping their weapons and running while the others lie unconscious or heavily vomiting on the ground.

*Clap clap clap*

Paul is clapping as he calls the disengage, allowing everyone to see the carnage that Allie wrought to the fullest: a dozen people laying on the ground groaning or completely out of it with the woman in question huffing violently over one such victim.

“RAAAAGGGGGHHH” She lifts her blood stained pole in the air, shouting at the top of her lungs. Slightly dramatic but I guess if it gained her the skill…

*ding*

“Well done recruit, not the best at being part of a line, but not all are meant to be in it” He nods at her before calling for some healers.

Oh we’ve got healers at hand? Well I was beginning to wonder what’d happen if someone got a strong blow to the head.

Anyways, where is that somehow helpful human? Ah there he is: ironic how I was wondering what’d happen if someone got a strong blow to the head.

Bending down over him, he’s completely out of it. Dropping a coin into his palm as part of ‘checking his pulse’, I gingerly make my way back to the changing lines, since I don’t have the skill myself yet so I need to continue beating myself up.

Though:

Sacrifice levelled up!

So at least now I know how to level that up without actually killing myself.

Right back to getting beaten up in an orderly manner

…

Congratulations! You have learnt the Proficiency: Polearm Mastery

PROFICIENCY: Polearm Mastery, beginner [lv1] (0%) (Passive)

You are mastering the ability to wield lengthy weapons with both hands.

Strength bonus: n/a

Dexterity bonus: n/a

Agility bonus: 10% increased attack rate

Flexibility bonus: n/a

Cost: None, Duration: sustained, Cooldown: None

For learning a new proficiency, xp is increased by 5%

Congratulations! You have learnt the Proficiency: Spear Mastery

PROFICIENCY: Spear Mastery, beginner [lv1] (0%) (Passive)

It is simple to wield a Spear, but to master it is another thing.

Strength bonus: n/a

Dexterity bonus: n/a

Agility bonus: 10% increased attack rate

Flexibility bonus: n/a

Cost: None, Duration: sustained, Cooldown: None

For learning a new proficiency, xp is increased by 5%

Yay finally, only took 2 hours of getting rather ruthlessly beaten by spears as I forced myself to jump straight into the fray. Plus I swear the humans around me weren’t blocking properly and allowing the enemies to target me…

Well whatever, I’ve got the proficiency so time to move on…to two handed weapons!!

Oh god, it’s Daren.

“MAGGOT, I SEE YOU FINALLY DECIDED TO COME TO ME. GOOD, I’LL TEACH YOU HOW TO FIGHT LIKE A PROPER MAGGOT” He screams at my face the minute I step into his part of the courtyard.

“SIR I WANT TO TRY ALL WEAPONS TYPES SIR”

“GRAB A SWORD” I rush over to the weapon rack, picking up a two handed sword, about half my height, oh christ it is heavy and I only take a few steps before giving up and dragging it behind me.

“THERE ARE 3 TYPES OF ATTACK WITH A SWORD, OVERHEAD” He swings his own massive sword at a straw dummy, cleaving it’s straw body into two “THRUST” he thrusts his sword straight through the dummy, enlarging the separate parts “AND SWING” He swings in from the left quartering the dummy before stopping and swinging the sword from the right, leaving the dummy loosely nailed on the wooden stake in 6 parts.

I’m just impressed he didn’t somehow slice the stake.

“ANY QUESTIONS MAGGOT? NO? GET SWINGING THEN” Wait I didn’t even get time to think of a question, dammit Daren.

Lofting the sword over my head

…

..

.

Come on sword, lift of the ground.

Well seems like not giving myself strength does actually stop simple things like lifting a freaking heavy sword.

Right, leverage, that works.

Bending down so the hilt rests on my shoulder, I lean forward and try to headbutt my feet while holding the hilt against my shoulder

Owowow my shoulder!! Jeesus that hurts!

At least the sword went into the straw dummy, the weight alone digging quite deep.

Right, so that’s an overhead, not happening without strength. What about a thrust?

Dragging the sword out the dummy, I deadlift it off the ground, causing my back to creak horribly. Walk forward and thrust! A terrible thrust, but it hit!

Though it’s nowhere near as effective as the overhead was.

Right, swings next. Sword on the ground to the side, and come onnnnn swiiiing. Agggggghh, man that was hard, swinging and dropping my body to the side, trying to get the momentum to lift the sword out of the ground.

It worked, but I feel like my shoulder’s are about to dislocate.

From right to left this time.

Doing the same as before: twisting and dropping my body to swing the sword, I’m rewarded with a shallow cut into the straw dummy.

“GOOD MAGGOT, WHAT A WEAKLING YOU ARE! NOW FOR AXES” He hands me an axe, which causes me to follow it to the ground as I hold onto it.

He once again shows me the 3 moves, overhead, thrust and swing. But this time the thrust isn’t very effective as only the tip of the axe enters, until he pushes the axe upwards, bisecting the straw dummy from the bottom.

Well I stand corrected, very corrected.

Same as before, overhead was with the shoulder, the leverage actually easier since I could stand up for the hilt giving me a slightly easier time. Thrust was as before with me then positioning myself for an overhead to bring the axe out…it moved about an inch before getting well and truly stuck in the straw dummy. More than nothing I guess. The swings were so much more difficult…I actually dislocated my shoulder after successfully swinging it, so I had to take a break to let it recover before doing swing number 2, with the same ending.

“HAH WEAKLING MAGGOT IT’S TRULY PITIFUL WATCHING YOU TRY FIGHT WITH AN AXE LIKE A REAL MAN. TRY THE MACE, I’M LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS” He doesn’t even hide his enjoyment as seeing me struggle.

I mean the few other people there are having a hard time, but seems like they all have strength so it is herculianly easier for them.

I wonder how the Npc’s are faring with this?

My wonderings stop as a warhammer brings me down to earth, literally.

Once again the thrust is different in Daren’s demo: after embedding the back of the hammer (the 2 curved spiky things) into the straw dummy, he lifts it and the stake (along with a bit of ground) and smashes it overhead

…

..

.

Yeah, I’m not going to be able to do that.

But I do the rest, cracking my shoulder on the overhead as the weapon bounced back, breaking my back on the thrust which barely penetrates and dislocating both arms twice in the swings as well as breaking my back.

All in all, using a mace took 2 hours just for 4 swings. Well that’s definitely not to be used in combat…

*ding*

Congratulations! Through a combination of effort and intelligence you have learnt the Proficiency: Two-handed Mastery

PROFICIENCY: Two-handed Mastery, beginner [lv1] (0%) (Passive)

It isn’t simple to wield a large blade and to master it is something else entirely

Strength bonus: n/a

Dexterity bonus: n/a

Agility bonus: 10% increased attack rate

Flexibility bonus: n/a

Cost: None, Duration: sustained, Cooldown: None

For learning a new proficiency, xp is increased by 5%

Though for a total of 12 swings, that’s awesome. Now if only I had strength I wouldn’t have used so much time in this.

But then again I don’t plan on using this proficiency much so thank Aiag it’s over.

“MAGGOT, COME BACK ANYTIME, HOPEFULLY WHEN YOU CAN ACTUALLY USE THE WEAPON WAHAHAH” He laughs boisterously as I bow goodbye and head over to Roirra. The final boss in this training ground of proficiencies (Well I guess they’re all final bosses if I’d chosen them last but whatever).

“Pick up a shield” She (it’s a he really but as with Regnar, ignoring reality) notices my presence and points at a fallen steel shield in what looks like a battleground.

I really could’ve watched what happened everywhere else but I’ve really been engaged in learning today…

In the dying light, I hold the circular shield in my right hand, not that comfortable.

“Block” Huh? AHH!

Her sword blurs above me and I raise my shield, only to feel the clang reverberate through my body and slam me to the floor.

“Stand up” I stand up, still shaking from the first impact. Well at least I know why this place looks like a battlefield.

Getting smashed to the side, I roll in the dirt, shield clanging by my side, grip digging into my forearm.

“Stand up” I feel like this is going to be said a lot in this session. At least she doesn’t call me a monster

…

Congratulations! You have learnt the Proficiency: Shield Mastery

PROFICIENCY: Shield Mastery, beginner [lv1] (0%) (Passive)

It is simple to hold a shield, but to make it part of your body is another thing

Strength bonus: n/a

Dexterity bonus: n/a

Agility bonus: 10% increased speed

Flexibility bonus: n/a

Cost: None, Duration: sustained, Cooldown: None

For learning a new proficiency, xp is increased by 5%

Ah only took an hour…I’m ready for bed now. Roirra really didn’t hold back. And I didn’t even get the block skill either...probably because I didn’t exactly block, just kind of get smacked down multiple times.

Letting my arms droop by my side (I don’t really have much choice, they’re completely dead), I head out of the courtyard, leaving only about 60 people there, still training hard despite the rise of the moons from the ground.

I’ve gained a lot of proficiencies and now to run the hell away to home!

“WAIT MAGGOT” One Daren stops me on the way out. “SINCE YOU’VE BEEN TRAINING HERE, TOMORROW THERE IS TO BE AN EXPEDITION TO THE HILLS FOR LIVE TRAINING, SUNRISE”

No offer?

QUEST: Live Training in the Hills

Daren has asked(?) you to join the live training in the hills tomorrow with the others.

Further details will be given if quest is followed

Rewards:

+1 intimacy with town

A weapon of your choice

Even the quest doesn’t know if Daren is asking or ordering me…well anyways it got me at intimacy with town. I like things like that, I need things like that…

Plus a weapon sounds good but I’m rich enough to buy quite a few good ones.

Right off to bed, because tomorrow is going to be pretty awful I can feel it!!