I could really use a lot more comments, critiques, suggestions, and the like. It really helps me to know where I am lacking and what the reader feels about the story I write. Most of the time as I write I find myself wondering if I am setting up the right atmosphere and the right mood. I'd like to know if my characters are monotone or unrealistic, most of the time I feel like I'm not expressing the right personality.

Even if your comment is small and concerning maybe a minor point or something you feel is not important enough to point out please write out your comment regardless. As I said anything helps and I do hope to be able to write a story you can and do enjoy.

Chapter Eight – Moonlight Princess

*** Sophia ***

I am six now. Papi, who is two years older than me, throws me a party every year to celebrate my birthday. This year too he set up a small get together at Helton’s house, he came for me in the morning so that we could spend the entire day celebrating my birthday. He had even brought me breakfast, it was milk with my favorite sweet breads and some fruit with a sweet cream that made them taste perfect.

Instead of working in the forge Papi came down to the river with us to swim and play, even Alice’s oldest sister came with us. Chasity was now fifteen and of marrying age, there were some suitors in the nearby town that had already talked to her father but she had turned every one of them down. Out of all of her sisters only Chasity was talented with magic, a rarity and a blessing since a mage can enter any academy of the three major cities, including the capitol. They are treated like nobles and have well-paying jobs, even the weakest of mages live well off lives. She wants to enter the Isyndril academy and make a good living so that she can take care of her family.

Papi says she is a talented wind mage and even teaches her sometimes when he comes to work in the forge. I am talented with earth as is natural for my people, he says I am a desert elf, a rarely seen people that survive in the desert by making their homes around beautiful oasis. He teaches me too, though I don’t always understand the lessons he is trying to pass on to me. He says I can’t teach anyone what I learn because only he and I know what I learn.

Currently we were playing three way beach ball, it was just Jenna, Alice, and me since it wouldn’t be fair if Papi played as he has incredible reflexes and is too fast and strong for us to keep up with. Chasity on the other hand doesn’t like playing much, instead she and Leo were sitting on some rocks watching us play.

Eventually we switched from beach ball to harpoon fishing, this was an activity that everyone joined in on. Jane, Helton’s wife, had come down to the river to ask Leo to fish something out of the river for dinner later. We all decided to help out since it meant getting back in the water where we could cool down our bodies after the summer sun and beach ball playing got us warmed up.

He painted circles and strange symbols around our eyes that let us see clearly through the water, though it was clear it was still hard to see past its reflective surface, the seals took care of that problem. We helped coral Gorna fish, they are slow armored fish that eat Bailo seeds from underwater kelp like plants. They are fast in short bursts and their thick scale skin is spikey and rough. Though ugly their meat is delicious, but they are hard to catch. They can’t be baited since the seeds are too small to place on a hook and they eat nothing else, harpooning them is also a no no since the piercing end of a harpoon will bounce harmlessly off its tough scales. Netting it is also difficult as they are fast enough to escape an enclosing net, they can tear through it once caught, and they are very heavy which makes it difficult to drag them out.

Leo’s harpoon is special though, it is designed with intricate spells that allow it to cut through water like air and cut through the tough hide. The harpoon can even dig into stone.

They usually hide in holes so we went about poking into any hole we’d find.

“I found one!” Jenna said excitedly as she pointed to a fleeing fish. “Aww, but it’s too small.”

“Eww!” Alice cried out retreating from the hole she had poked a branch into. “An eel!”

We all laughed at her reaction because she’d slipped when she retreated and got her side and left leg covered in mud.

A few minutes went by as we searched silently traveling up river.

“Hey, look!” Chasity pointed towards a large boulder flowing down river. “It’s George.”

George was a giant tortoise that roamed this river, he has been living in the area for as long as anyone can remember, he is like everyone’s local pet. Currently George had a mouthful of Bailo kelp in his mouth. The water grass grows very commonly in the center of the river in any spot deeper than five feet.

As he moved I noted a large Garno underneath him, it had pressed itself down as George passed by.

“Look, there’s a big one under George,” I pointed out. Leo looked towards me and my pointing finger then down into the water, he spotted the fish as well.

“Remember to keep your eyes on it so we don’t lose it,” Leo said as he readied himself waiting for George to get a bit further away so as not to scare him.

“On it,” I said gluing my eyes to the fish. The others quickly rushed over to help track it.

He launched the spear and like a blur it flew through the air cutting into the water with minimal impact, this particular part of the river was about ten feet deep, the Garno noticed the harpoon long before it reached him. It zipped through the water dodging the spear without even a glancing blow. Leo hurriedly reeled the harpoon back as he moved down the river following the Garno. Alice and her sisters came rushing to help track the fish.

“It’s going into that hole!” Alice pointed as the fish made a beeline for a hollowed tree trunk. Chasity, who was closest, unleashed a wind blade to scare it away from the trunk, the impact splashed water everywhere and made the river a little murky. Instead of hiding in the dirt or continuing towards the hold the Garno zipped further down river.

Again the harpoon cut through the air but missed again, it glanced off the side cracking several of its scales on its left side. Reeling the harpoon again we gave chase keeping the fish out of holes and any cover submerged trees could give it.

Its reaction was slow as it had tired when the third harpoon throw made its way towards him, the tip went through its tail, once caught the tip expanded so the fish could not escape. Leo visibly strained as he reeled the struggling fish in, but once out of water he touched it and it grew still. The fish was nearly three feet long and a foot thick.

Using a finger and wind magic he sliced open the fish and began gutting and cleaning it.

Tired out from the chase we headed back without Leo, leaving him to his task, and headed for the house where we could get cleaned up and changed. Near the forge hut was a bathhouse Helton and Leo constructed, the pool of water inside was always clean and warm.

The warm water felt good as opposed to the cold water of the river.

After getting cleaned up we headed to the house, we’d taken our time in the bath so dinner would be ready once we were out. The Garno had been baked with vegetables and a tangy fruit called a pineapple. It was one of my favorite dishes.

When we finished eating dinner Leo presented the birthday cake, he said that it was a tradition from a certain country to present a delicious cake decorated with one candle for every year lived. The person who was celebrating his or her birthday would then blow out the candles and make a wish in silence. I also learned another tradition the hard way, it was tradition for the birthday child to bite into the cake as was also traditional for the nearest person to shove the celebrator’s head into the cake.

I was unwilling to bite into the cake this time around but after Leo promised not to do it, not to push my face into the cake, and even moved to the other side of the table I bent down to bite into it. What I didn’t expect was for Alice and Jenna to betray me. So once again my face went Sploosh! into the cake leaving a dent in the otherwise delicious pastry.

After cleaning my face of icing and bread it was time for presents!

Alice gave me a pendant to wear around my neck, Jenna gave me a book I had been wanting, and Chasity gave me a beautiful hair pin. Leo promised to give me my present back at the castle where he had hidden it in my room, a masterful action indeed hiding it in plain view.

We went outside afterwards to gather around the fire pit where Leo began telling stories, some were funny while others were scary. Mr. Helton had his own set of good stories and Mrs. Helton even told us of how she met Mr. Helton. By the time the last story was told it was already growing dark.

“Well now is a good time as any,” Leo announced as it looked like the night was drawing to a close. “I have one gift waiting for you back in your room but I also brought another with me, they are new so hopefully they work right. It is a light show of fire and much sparkling debris. Please look out towards the ocean.”

Everyone turned towards the dark waters expectantly waiting for something amazing to happen. Leo opened up his palm and several small magic circles came to life in his palm. He pressed one and instantly small trails of light in the far distance seemingly emerging from the water flew towards the sky. As their flight began to arch the small lights suddenly exploded brightening the night sky with colorful explosions and loud booms.

The display was completely entrancing, it was beautiful and exciting to see the dark night be filled with color and fire. When the display was finally over I was a little sad, but I knew I would never forget this birthday party for the rest of my life.

I had wanted to return to the castle awake but the day had been fulfilling and exhausting, Leo had to carry me back in his arms. He was gentle with me even though he had to travel fast, not once did I wake during the night and by morning I found myself tucked in bed with my present at its foot. I tore into the wrapping excitedly, it was a long thin box that contained five rings, each a different color. There was also a letter inside stating the use and purpose of each ring. He calls them the Lunar rings as they are engraved with moon designs, they are also a one of a kind set made personally by him and infused with five very powerful spells.

I was very happy with my present as it was one of a kind and contained five of Papi’s most powerful spells.