I am back ! And I am not sure how long I am back,sorry for not posting again !

My current flow of life has me very much overwhelmed mainly school which I attend until 6PM and then do my work with the occasional study for the next test turning me dead tired and only desire for sleep and then the circle repeats.

I am from mongolia and If you haven't guessed it by now I am pretty obsessed with school and studying in general since I want to get to a decent college in america with a scholarship so don't worry I am not dead.

Just tired,I hope you enjoy this chapter,I had to read this two times because it always turned a bit too corny for me and thats already saying something.

I hope you enjoy reading !

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Scar had been quite silent since coming here,looking at her I could immediately see that she was thinking about a lot of things,the way she acted right now was a bit strange even for her standards,but even though she was acting strange,for some reason I felt a bit at peace just sitting here with someone who can keep me company not that it was very different from how we usually traveled up until now,it was just that me being alone is a pretty rare occurrence don't you think ?

Out of all of that it was also her loose attire that made me question the most why she was here right now,her open legs and thighs coupled with her clear white skin made her very alluring to watch,if I was any ordinary man in this world I would have probably succumbed to such beauty even though she wasn't at par with hestia in terms of looks or figure she was still someone who could make majority of the men look back at her while crossing the streets as if she was a walking treat only reserved for the finest consumers in this world and in terms of personality...

Ehm...lets just say neither hestia nor scar have the best personalities in this world it is pretty fascinating how people with such looks can be so deceptive sometimes,of course I am not the one to judge since I would be the most common victim of this category if you ask me.

Normally I wouldn't even look at these kinds of earthly desires too and actually I am not doing it now either nor am I saying that I don't like it,it is just that I got a bit more conscious about these things after thinking about it more throughly and having multiple sessions with hestia..

That got me into her...

lewdness I guess ?

I'd really liked to avoid calling myself a pervert of any sort since it really didn't fit me at all,I would only like to show this kind of affection towards hestia since she is all for the fore-play and aggressiveness with her kind of nature.

I thought for a moment thinking about stupid things while not really sure what to say really,moving my eyes left and right finally glancing back to scar,she was still quiet as ever lost in her thoughts while hugging her white pillow to her chest,looking at her I was clueless as to what to do I figured that she was here to discuss something with me like the incident today where I disappeared on her,but for some reason I don't feel like thats her original intent rather then that she seems to want something more from me and I could also slightly suspect what that something was,the only question was...

Could I give her that "something" if it was simply lending her a hand or a ear then it wouldn't be a problem,but if it was neither of these two what would I say ?...

-...

The room was dim,with only two hearts beating at the same time I felt a light breeze brushing past my cheek with it creating a comforting sensation as the night sky above continued to shine down with its curtain of stars coming down visible from the window in front of us,my senses were at high sensitivity so much that I could even hear a few voices down stairs,conversations passing to each other and sweet whispers flowing smoothly into a pit of passion brighting up this lively night.

My eyes were always directed towards scar the whole time,a bit more discerning trying to really "see" her as someone and not just how she was and observing her I noticed that she had already stopped fidgeting around surprisingly enough she seemed to have calmed down significantly while also looking out of the window,her eyes directly reflecting what she was thinking right now displaying rare kind of gaze that I didn't expect scar to show at the moment,it was so complicated in fact that even I felt bit more compassionate and light hearted towards scar while watching her.

She must...really miss her father huh..

I thought to myself feeling that I have to finally say something if not this night would end in a pretty awkward way,with that in mind I was just about to open my mouth and speak,but unfortunately I didn't get the chance to do so.

-Dawn,honestly do you think its worth doing all of this ?

She asked,her question pretty unexpected at the moment,I was really thinking that she would ask me about today's incident then something else,but for some reason I felt that this question in particular held a lot of weight to it the atmosphere had also changed significantly shifting a entire 180 degrees and sinking deep into the dark spot making me feel puzzled,but not lost.

Was it worth doing this ? Did she really just ask that ? Isn't she the person most determined about this quest doesn't she want to meet her mother again what is this sudden change of heart of hers ?

I wondered very confused at the moment as I couldn't understand what scar was trying to get at,but at the same time not able to stop that question from swimming inside my head constantly...what kind of question is this ? Of course ?!

R..right ?

I momentarily bit my lower lip quivering at the same time as I felt a churning feeling inside my gut...hey why am I doubting myself now ? Don't you want to go home ? Help sera why the sudden doubt ?

I asked myself and just as I asked myself a memory inside my head started to rewind itself showing me the hooded sera for a moment with me chasing after her...

-Hey why are you getting down all of a sudden...isn't your mother important to you ? If you give up now who is going to help her then other then you ?

I asked,listening to my weak and small voice I quickly realized that it wasn't the most positive or best way I could have said it,in short I wasn't being myself and I knew that too,something scar just said had rattled me.I even thought about this when chasing sera,but I forcefully pushed it away only thinking about reaching up to her and settling it then ending up never returning to it in the end.

Of course I wasn't the only one who noticed the way I spoke,scar who was right next to me obviously noticed that too and stared at me with her eyes that had a heavy look in them,she didn't say anything to my change of tone and only looked as if she understood my answer sympathizing with it too,but also displaying that she understood something else that kept her from following me,even though I always kept eye contact with her this whole time I felt a small sting inside my heart when further looking into her eyes as if I was wrong in some way.

Her demeanor had magically changed somehow,her shy self seemed to have disappeared into nothingness which was hard to believe and the current statue of hers just seemed a bit more taller then before more mature in fact,I had no idea what gotten into her so suddenly,but I felt that trying to pursue anything or change the topic was just too inappropriate at the moment so I didn't and simply listening to her watching her as she moved away from my gaze looking down at the wooden floor beneath us with a nostalgic look in her eyes speaking in a soft tone that had both

-Yes,if I don't do anything and give up then my mother will be never saved I will never be able to see her again too and as her daughter its my duty to help my mother because she is the person who gave life to me in this world,but at the same time I also know my mother very much and know how much she cares about me,if I ever asked her whether or not to save her in this situation she would undoubtedly tell me not to,after all she is my mother and just like my father she wants the best for me because I am her child,putting my life over her own is the reason she endures and lives...

Scar explained saddly,tears starting to appear in the corner of her eyes as she cracked up mid sentence sniffing lightly with her nose while tightening her grip on her pillow at the same time for comfort.

-I see...

Hearing scar say those words I could slowly understand from where she was coming from and why the sudden change of thought,she wasn't trying to give up nor did she lose hope all of sudden rather she didn't want to make her mother sad if failure should arise,I could even clearly imagine how her mother would feel like if she knew that her own daughter died or got captured trying to save her.

After all if my own stella was at the very same position as scar was,I would also never want her to come and get me it would have been all for naught if she did that making my sacrifice turn into nothing,but dust my feelings for keeping her safe were just too much as her life in my opinion was worth much more then mine would ever be.

But,still even then there was still something that was bugging me something that couldn't be gone unsaid.

-You don't want that right ? To be honest you don't want to give up right ? You want to see your mother again no matter what right ? You want her to hug you tell you that she loves you right ?

I asked no longer keeping my gaze at her as I also looked down onto the wooden floor narrowing my eyes my voice significantly rising from before with more passion within while speaking,scar who sat by my side visibly quivered hearing that,the answer was very obvious.

She did not.

The whole reason we came here was for our own objectives I wanted to help sera and get home scar wanted to save her mother and see her again.

If not for these reasons why would either of us trying to do what were trying to do,it just didn't make sense to say something like this and even though I understood how scar's mother must feel like that she didn't want her daughter to suffer like she did,I was 100% sure that even stella would go against everything I said and come for me at one point to save her big brother.

Even sera,even if she didn't want any help from me,I knew inside my gut that she needed it.

Back then,I could still remember those hateful eyes of hers when she told me about herself the vengeful spirit that she had a vendetta so big that not even I could simply make it disappear by a few words of reason.

She still had a bone to pick and it was this reason she came here after all just like our objective without a doubt and did she like it or not she was going to get help from me either way,after all.

She is my friend my very first friend.

(– We are friends, this is what i want to do)-(Chapter 44 if anyone wants to know)

I recalled her cheerful happy words,summoning my plasma sword at the same time as I stared at it throughly caressing the present of hers from a friend.

Yes,this is what I want to do.

I smiled,my spirit fully regain its confidence back in a radiant form as I glanced back towards the quivering scar,she was conflicted without a doubt not saying anything as she kept gripping onto her pillow as if it was holding her own mother in a painful manner,I thought that she was already over it,but clearly enough this was her last hurdle she had been over a lot of things,stressed very much,my words and actions over these past days had helped a lot,but some of these words and actions were also the cause of her problems making me feel as if I owed her a lot too.

I stood up my action clean and swift as I quickly stood in front of scar,looking down at her with a gentle smile,trying to look at her face hidden behind her red long hair that smelled like lavender.

The night was truly fresh and young the atmosphere outside seemed just so much more happier then this,but even then I didn't feel like going away,she needed someone to guide her and that someone just happened to be me,I am sorry hestia if I am stepping over my boundaries,but even I need to do this,I want to do this.

I thought to myself no longer trying to think about anything else as I proceeded forth,opening my arms in a wide arc as I completely enshrouded scar into my hug putting her head over my shoulder as I gently caressed her head like I do to stella.

-Huh...Wh...what ? Wh...why...why are you...

she muttered clearly not in the most optimal state to say her sentence right,but I did't care and simply shushed her to be quiet which she obediently followed in a instant leaning further into my embrace as she started to get lost in it.

That night,I hadn't done much sleeping none at all to be precise,scar on the other hand nodded off pretty quickly after calming down making herself comfortable inside my chest too and pretty much sleeping on it turning me into a pillow.

I didn't mind that really and just climbed into the bed with her guarding while guarding her sleep at night blankly looking out of the window into the sky.

I hope we finish soon.

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