“HATE! HATE! HATE! HATE! HATE! HATE! HATE! HATE!!! I FUCKING HATE THAT BICTH!!!” 'Angelic' figure shouted in the air. “'OH, COULD I GET A FLOWER? STOP HURTIN PUPPIES!' BAH! WHO CARES ABOUT SOMETHING AS TRIVIAL AS THAT?!” that was Pyro, and he was pissed off. Right now he was enraged after all those days, which were only few, along with Linda the Witch. A being so carefree, with no common sense, and a deathwish, being near him was getting on his nerves.Fortunately for Linda, Pyro was already far away from her. Unfortunately for some adventurers that were on their quest for bunny meat, Pyro was near them.

“Is that a bird?” was question of one of them.

“Nah, it's probably a cloud.” said their leader looking around for bunnies. “Better focus on finding the... what in the name of Light is that?”

“IT'S YOUR DOOM BITCHES!” shouted 'bird' splattering the leader of adventurers under him while laughing.

“Demon! Quick-” started the warrior, but was immediately cleaved in half by the claws of Pyro. Following were earth spikes impaling his comrades.

“OHHH... SO GOOD!” currently Pyro was suffering from [Berserker] which he gained after killing creatures under [Enrage] condition. Common thoughts that vampire are undead and so they don't suffer from mental influence is wrong, vampires are just highly resistant to it, but not immune. “KILLING SPREE!!!” and immediately after notification blocked his vision.

Killing Spree!

Quest given by your favorite god.

Crush, Kill and Destroy! Kill all the humans from hillbilly town and destroy everything. Bonus points if you make it look like divine retribution.

Reward: Well that depends, but I'll throw you Berserker Sub-class upfront. Eh... oh and here's one more quest.

Gardening 101

In case you wondering, it's Kane, your favorite god of tentacles and other hentai stuff.

Make a city of those annoying zealots into something pretty, like garden. Gaia nags me about it, saying that there are no proper nature cities, as those elves watched too much anime, and so there no Tree-type cities.

Reward: That's complicated, but you'll get a soul companion and potential girlfriend.

After the notifications were closed Pyro calmed down a bit. “Oh cool. New stuff. Hey Kane, can I have a poison affinity after I finish 'Gardening'?”

Can't see why not. Just ask ask Gaia about it.

“Fine by me. Oh hey, I'm not mad... Kane! Can you add dampened emotions semi-passive as reward for 'Spree'?”

… Dude, I can, but what's the fun in it?

“Oh right. Ignore this one, I just sometimes wish for something stupid.” Pyro scrapped the idea, as it was not as fun as he thought it would be. “Though add it anyway, can't be over prepared.”

And... done. Anything else Lordship?

“Nah, everything is fine. But if you want to give me some cool armor, it would be the-”

I have one in pink color. Interested?

“... No, that's fine.”

Now be a good champion and finish the quest.

“Yeah, yeah. Reward is better be worth it.” said Pyro while thinking about what was the story with those tentacles.

That's the effect of my blessing. Though I would prefer if you would use it as I intended, not like a weapon.

“Okay, I will use it as extra limbs for labor. Habby?”

Habby? What-

“No connection. Please contact me again at some other point of time. Beep.” with a smug look on his face, Pyro moved in the direction of city. There was a quest to complete- “Dude, I tolerated your POV long enough, switch it back to mine!”

… Is it necessary to break walls? I am the-

“Yeah, heard it, don't care. Quick POV change!”

Fine.

Pyro POV.

“Thanks man.” well I don't really like when he switches the POV from me, but I can tolerate it sometimes. Anyway my current goal is A: Kill the humans, save the earth. B: make a garden on the ashes of a city. C: make fertilizer for garden. Now it was only to try again the transformation. Try to remember and- “Holy shit. It's working!” I got tentacles! Well one tentacle, but still. “Nice.” I can move it similarly to my arms, means I don't need to focus on it to move, just like arms or legs. I could scream 'Nya-ha-ha', but I don't have fur, nor I fell like a cat, though last part is debatable. “Well let's find some targets, after I finish those quests. Any more and I won't be able to take new ones.” Which is rather annoying. Can't I have like unlimited amount of active quests?

With such thoughts I finally came to the outskirts of this... what was this zealotville was called again? Eh, whatever. Just start the 'Divine retribution'. But first I need to transform into something similar to angel... Yeah, just those illusory wings and pearl-white armo, completing the look with a spear, as that would be much easier to make with that light magic, than greatsword. Also there was some ritual... I think Ariel had some info on that one... Need to get back to those caves? I think I should have the connection with my minions, but I could never before connect with them... maybe something obstructs the connection? Concentrate on something familiar like... Mr Peanuts? Well at least I would know if it's him. Start the meditation, connect to the mana in the air, some other magic stuff and scream with all my mind “MR PEANUTS!!!”

“Chief? Is that you?”

“Who're you? What do you want? Leave me alone! Wait, last part is just a habit.” sometimes acting as a weakling was fun back on Earth, but not as fun as watching my enemies burning alive... I love grilled meat.

“It's me, Mario!” Seriously?

“What the plumber, who liked playing with strange mushrooms and never plumbed anything, wants from me?”

“I mean it's me, Peanuts! Finally you can-”

“Yeah, yeah. I prefer when you squeak, much more adorable. Anyway I need your help with a ritual.”

“*Squeak!*”

“Was it yes or no?”

“*Happily squeaks in acceptance*”

“Okay, can you teleport to my location?” Oh wait, he doesn't know any-

“*Winning Squeak!*” (Mr Peanuts)

“Yeah, hello. Now please use the proper language unless the Bones nearby.” (Pyro)

“Oww... OK. Now what do you want Creator?” (Mr Peanuts)

“Call me Chief. Anyway I need a ritual circle, which will sap the strength of those inside it, and then another one, which summons some nature spirit.” (Pyro)

“Hmm... why would you think I know something like that?” (Mr Peanuts)

“... Ariel... Oh shit... I summoned a wrong minion!” (Pyro)

“Nah Chief. I know such things, I was a pet of one strange *censored* being.” (Mr Peanuts)

“You mean *censored*?” again? Don't break the fourth wall, don't break the fourth wall... “*CENSORED!!!* YOU *CENSORED!* PIECE OF *CENSORED!!!*” (Pyro)

“Cheif?” (Mr Peanuts)

“Oh yeah, ignore me, it's just that I am rather crazy, so sometimes I hear-” (Pyro)

“Oh, he's real.” (Mr Peanuts) …

“WHAT?!” now I think I know why there was strange changes of my perception. Oh well, not like I care about it. “Well back to the previous topic. Will you make such circle?” (Pyro)

“Spell array. If I would be you female childhood friend, I would probably smack you on the head a few times for not knowing something as simple as that.”

“I am not from magic world.” (Pyro)

“Yes, I know. But it doesn't mean that I can't fool around! Also this won't be for free.” (Mr Peanuts)

“What do you want? More cookies from my inventory.” (Pyro)

“Um... sorry. That time I wanted them so much... Oh right, my price is... jar full of cookies!” (Mr Peanuts)

“Chocolate cookies?” (Pyro)

“Chocolate and nuts! Mr Peanuts wants some peanuts!” (Mr Peanuts)

“OK. Now start preparing the array.” (Pyro)

“At once my Fu-” (Mr Peanuts)

“I DARE YOU SAY THAT!” (Pyro)

“*Zipping sounds*” (Mr Peanuts)

“Good mascot. Now go! And I will cook some cookies... oh yeah, do you have peanuts?”

“... You can make them with magic.” and he ran off. Well at least he gave me a hint.

“Cookies... well he shouldn't have a too large jar, right?” why do I have a bad feeling about it? Like I was scammed? “Mr Peanuts, what size the jar we talked about?”

“Oh you know... two stories high.” …

“Fuck... where did he get such a jar? I hope it was not a gift from the same entity that gifted me the kulpo juice before.”