《Teaching Heroes of Might and Magic》Chapter 19: A True Family
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As I caressed Sasha's head, I thought about what it actually meant to be a father.
I mean, most of my childhood memories are from my mother being there for me, with my dad vaguely being in the background, going along with whatever my mother said or did.
He did have his big moments and I have many great memories regarding my father, but... I don't recall him ever making a major decision regarding my lifestyle.
Aside from that one time I wanted to choose 'Drama' as a class in School, but he was ferociously against it.
Thinking about it carefully, now that I had accepted that I viewed Sasha as my own child after several months of deep discussion with myself, what was I supposed to do now.
That aside, what do I tell her? Do I tell her when she wakes up? 'Hey, girl, I'm your dad!'... I mean, that would just be weird and creepy.
So now I have two problems. 1, what exactly does being a father entail and 2, how do I tell her I view her as my own child.
Or do I just keep it bottled up and never tell her. No, that is even creepier then just telling her outright.
Oh! I just had a brilliant idea. Whenever Sasha or me have another emotional moment, I'll tell her then.
That way it'll come out both smoothly and have more of an impact.
Wait... I just realised I had another problem. Sasha still has a father, and her father was very nice to her from what she had mentioned about him.
So... I don't think Sasha wants another father. Fuck. If I told her I viewed her as my own daughter, it would just fuck with her psyche even more. I don't want her to have to choose between her biological father and me.
That would just be cruel and petty.
Hmm... Is there a difference between being a grandfather and being a father? I don't really know. Since I'm neither.
So, I could tell her I view her as my granddaughter? Would that work? I think that would be fine...
Fuck it. I'll think about this problem properly later on, since Sasha was about to wake up.
I looked down at her and watched as she slowly opened her eyes and stared around in confusion.
She looked up at my hand that was caressing her head and she smiled warmly as she turned towards me.
She had this immensely peaceful look upon her, as if she had no worries at all in the world.
Knowing that her breakthrough had allowed her to finally be at peace with herself, was a huge relief for myself.
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She slowly began to get up, so I stop patting her. After a few moments, she was now sitting on top of the covers of her bed, right next to me.
Sitting by my side, she leaned her against me, and simply closed her eyes. She wasn't sleeping, I could tell. She was simply, relaxing.
As she leaned against me, I studied her. She was currently playing with her mana, meaning she knew she had broken through, but she wasn't shocked at all. Unlike the first time she broke through, which had left her stunned.
She played with her mana, extending its reach and then bringing it back, coiling it around both herself and me.
We sat like that for a few hours, simply enjoying the peace and quiet.
After a while, Sasha suddenly got up. She walked in front of me and then stood there, staring at me.
As I looked up at her face, she was blushing, so I realised why she had suddenly gotten up.
She was wondering how come she was in another dress and sleeping in her bed.
Now, I was wondering how to explain this to her but she suddenly began to speak.
Sasha: “Thank you” was the first thing she said to me, which caused me to smile towards her “For being with me, watching over me, caring for me, for everything” she said as she jumped into my embrace and buried her face in my chest. I wasn't sure if she was crying or not, so I simply patted her head, but I didn't miss her whisper which said 'and for loving me'.
I felt very sad when I heard that silent little whisper, so I hugged her tightly.
We sat like that for a while as I realised I had dodged the little bullet known as 'explaining how I had cleaned her and dressed her'.
After awhile, she slowly got up and smiled towards me, but she had a weird look on her face, as she began to fidget.
I think she wanted to ask me a question, but she wasn't sure if she should.
Zev: I saw no reason she shouldn't ask me a question if she had one “Tell me little one” I said as I studied her “What is the question that is bothering you and I'll answer it if I can” but contrary to what I thought, instead of my words relaxing her, she began to blush once more.
Sasha: “Master” she suddenly chimed as she looked down, hiding her face from me “Am I just a disciple to you?” she asked quietly “Or am I...” she looked up at me, tears gathering in her eyes as she bit her lips.
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She looked so adorable like this. You just wanted to hug her. That aside, I breathed a sigh of relief on the inside.
From her facial expression, I could tell this wasn't a love confession. Well, not in the sense I thought it was anyway.
I don't know how I'd react to that. So thank god it wasn't.
What she wanted to know was if she was more than just a disciple to me. If she was important to me. If she was similar to family to me. She already knew the answer, but she wanted to hear it from me, so I decided to oblige with her wish.
Sasha: “I know you care for me, I know you lo..” she stopped herself from completing her words as she looked at me, small bubbles of tears gathering at the corner of her eyes “Everything you've done for me, you did for no reason at all, you simply cared for me because you could” she said as she grabbed my hand and held it to her chest “You never asked for anything, and you tried your best to do everything you could for me” her tears began to fall as she spoke to me.
Even my own eyes began to itch. God damn it. Why is this place so dusty.
Sasha: “All these years we spent together, no matter what I went through, no matter what hardships I put you through, you silently endured by my side, through all my tantrums, my nightmares, my tears, you consoled and cared for me as best as you could” she stuttered as she talked in between her tears “I've seen how you look at me, that gentle look in your eyes, it never held any ulterior motives, you never looked at me with anything but kindness and lo..” she started crying and couldn't finish her words.
My god, this room was so fucking dusty. All of these dust particles were gathering around my eyes and it was really itchy.
Sasha: “Thank you so much for loving me for what I am” she said with a beautiful smile on her face “Thank you for loving me for being a little girl just like a father” and with that she began to laugh as she cried, pure happiness visible on her face as she emptied all of her remaining emotions.
I began to cry as well. My tears dropped. For fucks sake, this room was way too fucking dusty, but I wasn't really angry. On the contrary, I was quite happy.
This was also a good time to say she was a like a daughter to me. No matter what happens, it was best to get it out of my chest.
I don't know how she would react, but no matter what, I had to tell her how I viewed her. If I just kept my own emotions bottled up, it would affect us both in the future.
Zev: “Little one” I pulled her close to me and sat her on my knee “To me, you have become what I have never had before” and with that I hugged her tightly “You have become a daughter to me” and with that, I heard her cling to my robe and cry quietly.
But her tone was one filled with joy and I could hear her mix a laugh or two into her tears.
It seems she was more than just happy to hear me call her my daughter.
I consoled her as she let her emotions out.
I wonder how many times Sasha has cried since we got to know one another. How many times out of pain or sadness and how many times out of joy.
Out of pain and sadness, she has cried at least a few dozen times. She did have quite a few nightmares, from both her past as well as the events of the Tzun Rei Sect.
Out of joy, nowhere near as many times as its counterpart, but still quite a few times.
She was such an emotional girl. Not that I held it against her. Seeing as how I'd probably cry far more than her if I was the one in her situation.
Seeing as how I was crying right now.
----
Old Man here,
Hope you all enjoyed the chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. My room was really dusty when I wrote it, so you know, I should probably clean it.
Nonetheless, I guess this chapter could be called an defacto end to Arc 1. I decided to end the arc like this, because this seemed like a good point.
The next few chapters will build up the next segment before starting Arc 2. So these next few chapters, probably around 20 to 23 or 24, will be called 'Inbetween Chaps'.
Anyway, I hope you enjoy the story, and if you like it, please do favourite, follow and rate. You don't have to do any of that, but it would make me happy if you do ^^.
Anyway, Love and Peace,
-Old Man.
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