《Summoning Shenanigans》Book 2 Chapter 53
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“Mornin’ D’Vorak.” I said, sliding into the same table the demon occupied just before the sun came up. “Having trouble sleeping?”
He nodded, “Yeah. I’ve spent my whole life looking forward to this, ya know? That chance to finally evolve, see what my options are. I know I’ll have my chosen one open, but what else could I choose?”
I was nodding along. “Well, would you like some advice from someone who hasn’t spent a lifetime dwelling on it?” He nodded, so I continued, “Look carefully over all your options. And in the end, pick one that resonates with you. Don’t worry about anyone else.”
“Isn’t that a bit selfish?” He asked, staring at me.
“Not at all. I think it would be incredibly selfish of someone else to ask you to sacrifice the rest of your life with an evolution that you don’t like.”
“Thanks.” He said after a few moments, sitting up a bit straighter in his chair.
“Anytime. Now, if you don’t mind I’m going to tear into this breakfast. It’s been a while since I’ve had steak and eggs.” I replied, staring at the wondrous meal that had just been placed in front of me. Sure, it was from a gale buffalo instead of a cow, but that just made a thick steak airy on the stomach instead of heavy. We had gotten lucky on our trip back and came across a herd, and had taken three of the beasts. We were steadily working our way through the first beast, and they had promised us a feast after everyone finished evolving. I had no idea how they were going to get it cooked evenly, but they were going to smoke an entire buffalo.
“Hello ladies.” D’Vaen chuckled as he plopped into a chair at the table. “What’s up with you after we send this guy off?” He asked, nodding at me.
“Gonna work out a way to get the drop on a Skymaster hopefully. You?”
“Nothing too serious. Trying to see if I can get a few cuties to agree to give me a massage. Make sure I’m nice and relaxed before trying to evolve. Tracking a Skymaster? Damn, but you don’t go for half measures, do ya?”
“Not if I want some top quality gear. I got a plan though, and an escape route. It shouldn’t be too bad.” The others laughed, and we settled in for a relaxing morning. Eventually it was time for D’Vorak to make his way to the tower for his evolution. The square was surprisingly at attention when he made his way across, several people nodding to him. He touched the square and read through things for a little bit, then disappeared. After that, the ever present noise resumed as things got back to normal. I made a quick goodbye to D’Vaen and Elendria, promising I would be back later tonight. Spreading my wings, I took off to the north to look for a Colossal Falcon.
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
Three hours later, I came across my first falcon. Unfortunately it let out a piercing cry and I also came across falcons two through twelve, and I beat a hasty retreat. It wasn’t that I couldn’t hold my own, though it probably would have been difficult. I just didn’t want to battle.
“Goddamn reinforcement calling bastards.” I grumbled as I slowly made my way up the cliff face several hours later. I had spent an hour trying to get close to them, only to have the damn birds call for reinforcements every time they saw me in the air. So I tried getting close by using gravity magic to fly. I kept close to the ground, but their sensitivity to magic was astounding. Before I could even see the bastards, they would call for reinforcements and I had to make another retreat. So now I was on to my final option. Physically climbing the cliffs to get to a nest, and hope I can get a shield up that would prevent sounds from getting out.
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The worst part about this entire thing was that I couldn’t even trust that low level spells like featherweight would work. So it was all based on my physical attributes, and my admitted lacking mountain climbing skills. Luckily there weren’t many sheer cliffs. That still didn’t stop me from being cautious, as even if I would be able to save myself with magic, I would still have to start over. Eventually I came to a resting spot, and thought ten minutes would do me wonders. A small bit of jerkey and a few swigs of water, and I was back at it.
Instead of climbing more, I stalked the ledge I was on until I came around the corner of a boulder, smiling as I did. Not even ten feet away was a nest with a falcon sitting in it, eyes constantly on the sky. This was it! Time to see if I could pull off several high level spells in quick succession.
Relishing the challenge, I dove right in. A high powered gravity spell right underneath the falcon to pin him in place, and delay the reinforcement call for just long enough. Immediately I created a void dome around us. Just a few inches worth of pure vacuum.
SKREEEEEEE!!!!!!!
“GAAAAAH!” I cried out, clapping hands around my ringing ears. I didn’t expect the sound to be that loud, but I honestly should have. With a wave of my hand, chains of stone shot out of the ground and wrapped around the falcon, pinning his wings to his sides. Hands grasped his feet, pinning him in place. With him secured, I stumbled over, slightly disoriented from the lound screech.
The lack of continued attack seemed to have confused the falcon, as it was easily at my mercy. “Hey there big fella. I know you’re smart, as y’all keep calling reinforcements when you see me. I was wondering if you would hear me out on an offer. If you do, you can have this nice quarter of gale buffalo. If you agree, tap your foot once. Tap it twice for no, and I’ll release you and leave the meat as an apology.” I pulled out the rear hindquarter of one of the buffalo we had killed, leaving it in front of him. I thought about only releasing one foot, but decided against it. If I wanted to build some trust, I had to extend some first. Instead of leaving just one foot free, all the stone bindings crumbled. I even made sure that they retreated away from the meat, so that it wouldn’t turn it gritty.
The falcon cocked its head at me as if I was crazy, staring at me for just a bit. It stomped a foot, and started slowly tearing into the meat. I took that as my signal to go ahead, so I started talking, “Right. Well, first off I won’t try and deceive you, I am hunting the tailfeather of a Skymaster, and I’ll need your help.” It froze midway to taking another bite and stared at me, so I quickly continued, “Don’t worry, you will have absolutely zero participation in the battle. I was hoping to put everything into a simple, system contract similar to what a summoned creature can do. You know I can fly, but my wings cast a rather large shadow. I need someone to get me above the Skymaster, hopefully in line with the sun, and let me jump off. After that, your part would be done. In exchange, before I leave today I’ll give you another buffalo quarter.”
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The bird squawked at me, and tapped its foot twice on the carcass. “Two of those quarters?” I asked, getting an enthusiastic nod from the bird. “Done.”
“System?” I asked, looking to the sky. “Is there a way to formalize this contract?”
Yes.
If you wish the system to write out the contract, it will cost 50 silver. If you wish to enter the names and agreements yourself, taking on full responsibility for the wording, the cost is 50 copper.
“Really? Well, it’s simple and I could use the practice. I’ll go ahead and write the agreement myself.” I said, and an empty blue box appeared in front of me. Not wanting to be deep in legalese, for fear of confusing and alienating the bird. After ten minutes of work, I presented the contract to the system and presumably the bird.
Contract for services
Sean O’Carrol hereby offers this contract for goods and services exchanged with Colossal Eagle. For his part in the contract, Sean offers:
2 primal quarters of gale buffalo meat, to be paid before the end of today
For the Colossal Eagle’s requirements:
Carry Sean on his back so that he may initiate an attack from above on a Skymaster. This attack shall begin the day after tomorrow. Once Sean has left the Eagle’s back, this contract and all obligations between the Eagle and Sean will be considered fulfilled.
Penalty clause: Should either party fail to deliver on their part, the system will penalize said party by stripping them of five levels. Should there be no sightings of Skymasters during the single day of the contract, the Eagle will not be penalized and the contract will be considered fulfilled.
After reading through the contract, or something that allowed the eagle to understand it, I got a notification that the contract had been accepted. Nodding to the eagle, I pulled out two more of the primal quarters, leaving them in the nest next to the third one it was still working on. “Thank you for working with me, and sorry again for how we had to start things. I’ll return here the day after tomorrow, and we can start hunting. Sound good?” The bird nodded, and I turned and leapt from the nest, unfurling my wings as I did so. I was headed back to town, excited that I had managed to secure a contract.
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
Valorian’s POV
I stared in awe as we made our way toward the royal capital, or the City on the Hill. The city was full of spires, reaching toward the heavens. The most ornate were obviously the royal residence in the central portion, but the mage’s tower certainly drew the eye. It was enchanted to look like a slice of the sky at night, and would supposedly change with the seasons. I was also rather shocked that it had only taken four days to reach by caravan, as most things back home were spread out much farther. Sure, most minor towns were within a day’s travel, but the major cities took at least two weeks to get to.
“Ah, she’s a sight for sore eyes.” Adam, the driver of my wagon chuckled. “Been near six months since I’ve been home.”
“Got a woman keeping a bed warm for you?” I asked.
“Nah. Couldn’t do that to anyone, myself included. Eventually one of us would stray, and I’d have nobody to blame but myself.”
“A wise philosophy.” I nodded.
“Eh, practical is more like it. How about you? Any big plans?”
I nodded. “Yep. Gonna go see the church of Lokir.”
“HAHAHAHAHA!” Adam bellowed, slapping his leg. “Church of Lokir? Boy, them ain’t no big plans, but ya got me a good one in his name.”
“Oh? Why not?”
“Cuz! It ain’t no landmark! Lokir ain’t one to have any grand cathedral or any of that. Hell, if you moved his church into the warehouse district, nobody’d be able to find it!” He chuckled.
I looked at him like he was crazy, but he seemed to be telling the truth. “So, if I was to look for it, how would I find it?”
“Find the mage tower first. Then cross the street to the west. There’ll be two ceremonial guards, but those poor bastards don’t get to do much. I’ll bet their halberds ain’t even sharp!” He said, and for the next few hours our conversation drifted toward things that weren’t nearly as consequential. Despite it looking like we were close, the distance across the plain to finally reach the city was deceptive. It took us the better part of the day to arrive, and the sun was about an hour from setting when we finally made it to the gates.
“Thanks for the directions and the company Adam.” I said, slipping him a small purse after we had made our way inside. I had just about jumped off the side of the wagon when his hand gripped my shoulder.
“Easy now, aren’t you going to head to the inn with us? Gendry springs for the first three drinks for everyone, even passengers.”
“Sorry, I’ve got some time sensitive stuff I need to take care of. Safe travels!” I said, hopping off and disappearing before he could find the ten gold coins in the purse I had left for him. With that taken care of, I started threading my way through the city towards the mage tower. It was getting harder to pick it out against the night sky, but luckily I managed to make my way there just as the sun finally set. I was surprised at the expense, as the city was amazingly well lit by magic street crystals. I spun in place for a second, before finding my targets.
Two ceremonial guards, Adam described them, and boy was he right. Their ‘armor’ didn’t match, and I swear one helm looked more like an apprentice’s failed attempt at a pot than an actual helm. Their halberds did look serviceable, though it would take a few hours on a wetstone to start, followed quickly by roughening and redoing the leather grips on the haft. Feeling sorry for them, I walked up to the one who was picking his nose and smiled.
“Greetings. Is this the church of Lokir?” I asked, though I knew the answer. The ground beyond them was practically radiating power.
“Aye, what’cha want?”
“I am here to formally surrender and request asylum.” I said with a smile.
“Huh?”
“Surrender? To us?” The other one asked, scratching his pot/helm. “Why?”
“So that I can request asylum of course. I want your patron diety’s protection from my former employer.”
“And whassat got to do with surrend’ring?” The first asked, having finally excavated his booger and flicking it down the street.
“Look, will you trust me? There’s just an order to how this has to go, and the first part is formally surrendering myself to your custody.”
“Right, formal stuff’s normally a bit over our heads. But you seem to know what’s what, so we can follow yer lead. Bill will, someone has to stay and guard the place.”
“Fuck right off ya wanker!” Presumably Bill shouted, turning to his partner. “Who died and made you my boss Clint?”
“Nobody had to die, I’ve got the seniorisis. I’m the boss, on account of I’ve been here the longest. So you follow his lead, and I’ll man the gates. Simple dereliction of duties.” Clint said, looking smug.
“I think you mean delegation of duties, but oh, you aren’t listening to me are you?” I said, as the two went back and forth for a bit, before Clint cuffed Bill upside the head.
That seemed to settle it, as a now much grumpier Bill turned to me and asked, “So how do you surrender and whatnot?”
“Right. Well, normally I would surrender my weapons and items, but that is easy because it is all inside this spatial ring. So I’ll give you this, and then you can tie my hands together and lead me into the church. It helps to say that you agree with my surrender and someone in the church will be by soon to discuss asylum. With that, I formally surrender.” I explained, handing over the ring and trying not to laugh as Bill juggled holding my ring, tying my hands, and keeping his halberd upright. After a few minutes, where I had to hold the ring and halberd for most of it before surrendering them again, we managed to get things sorted.
“Right, I guess since you’ve been right polite with this surrendering bit, we’ll be taking you in to talk with the higher ups about asylum. Follow me.” He said, giving a gentle tug on the rope. I was happily smiling as I crossed the gate, doubly so when alarms started ringing. The gate behind me slammed shut as I was illuminated in a column of light, giving me a lovely view of the shocked look on Bill and Clint’s faces. Maybe I should have mentioned this could happen? I didn’t get a chance to think on it too long, as the main building erupted, spewing forth half equipped guards and pale faced priests that nonetheless immediately formed a serviceable battle line. Bless his heart, Bill apparently took his duties seriously.
“It’s all right, it’s all right!” He shouted, stepping in front of me. “This ‘ere guy done surrendered to me and is asking for asylum.”
“Oh?” An amused voice came from the back, and the defensive line parted to reveal a priest in leather armor more befitting a rogue. “And do you know just who you managed to subdue Bill?”
“No sir Archbishop, sir. Just that he sorta explained the process, and it seemed like something the gate guard could start to do. Here, this is his spatial ring, with his weapons, and I’ve got his hand all tied up.”
“Thank you Bill. Please, return to your post, and I’ll take over custody from you.”
Bill started to hesitate, and I whispered, “It’s fine Bill, you did wonderful. In fact, this seems to be the guy I need to discuss my asylum with. I doubt the process could have gone any faster.”
“It is? I did? Erhrm, right. I did. Well, good luck on your asylum sir, unfortunately I have responsibilities to do. The Archbishop here will be taking care of your request personally, so make sure you show him the proper respect, okay?” He said, before walking back to his post for a second, before realizing he still held the rope tied to my hands. An awkward bit with him giving he rope to a smiling Archbishop later, and he was back at his post. As soon as the Archbishop held the rope, his magic shot through it and bound my wrists and magical abilities without any outward sign, getting a raised eyebrow from myself as two guards took up positions with swords drawn just behind me.
“Perhaps we should be discussing this inside?” he asked.
“Of course. I’m in your care.” I said, following him as he led the procession inside. The column of light had condensed into shackles along my arms and legs, but still let me walk almost unhindered. All in all, a much better response than what I had originally envisioned, considering my head was still attached to my shoulders.
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