《Lazy Ash》52. 9000, Talk, and a Car

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I am not going to lie I have been playing the shit out of Pokemon Go. To the point where my sleep schedule is completely fucked. I have been out to as late as 6 am hunting down shit. I am not going to apologise for being a nerd it's who I am. Even at this point technically I am sitting between two poke lures with an incense on. This area is high in magnamites and my magnaton needs more CP.

Be glad though my releases aren't as slow for this as they are for GW. With work, way too much family shit, and now pokemon go I am trying to multi-task as much as possible hence this chap while hunting down this damn magmar that just popped up.

Without further ado here's the next one.

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Ash

Looking at the line of destruction I just made all I could do was smile.

"My power is totally over 9000." I say out loud with a smirk on my face.

Most if not all the demon kids died in that attack and I am relatively sure none will make a repeat appearance. Right now I am checking out the new addition to my body while everyone else is looking at me in pure shock.

"Wonder how hard it is to fly with these things?"

To answer my own question I slammed off the ground and start flapping them. It worked at first but....I crashed head first into a building.

Okay. Mental note: Practice flying.

For now I am able to at least flap my wings and hover low. Nothing to fancy but hey got wings! Alita always suspected I would get them and now I got them.

I miss them. Hmmm wonder if I can visit heaven? They better have chairs though I am not standing around all the time!

While I was going through random thoughts in my head the others came up to me. The twins were about to say something when I felt a sharp pain in my ankle.

"Owwowowowowowo! What the hell!?" I look down and see Ciar latched on to me with an angry expression.

"You will never do such a thing again master!" She shouts at me while my blood dribbles down her face.

I picked her up and started comforting her."Sorry pup but like I said you all I truly give a damn about here.(Well you, the motorcycle, and Lambo)" I kept that last part in my head. No point in making her even more pissed off.

I placed her on my head and turned to our group. I had to narrowly dodge a punch thrown by Nick.

"Nicky my man what wrong?"

"Because of you we have 12 people left! Are you trying to get everyone here killed!?" He shouts at me.

I blink back in surprise."Not really but I did tell you they were not my priority. And if this is about the power at the end there I totally just gained it. Oh hey look my phone survived!" I turn from him completely as honestly not my problem. My phone is more important to me than some random strangers.

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I wonder if that makes me a bad person? Generally, I see all types of situations I can't handle from the comfort of my room a pain in the ass. Thus my people skills might not be the best. Add the fact that technically up until a little bit ago I had a total of five voices in my head, three of which are different versions of me from the future while the other two were an Arch angel and a Nine tailed Kitsune who lets face it were my only friends in years and my measure for any compassion is about nil.

Also Darkness did something that I can feel slowly changing me. I am not 100% clear as to what he did but I have a pretty good guess that if proved true could make my sanity meter drop even further.

I look over at the twins who are still staring at me in shock.

"What?"I ask them.

"We didn't see that coming. We thought for sure you were done for." They replied.

"Oh love you guys too. But didn't see the power up coming either. Expected something like it one day but meh."

They shook their heads at my response. "We may not like you and despise how you treat people as though they are nothing but we know you are trying your best to keep us alive. So thank you."

Wow totally didn't see an apology coming. Probably shouldn't mention I haven't really been putting my all into getting these two out. Everyone else was shooting me angry and hateful looks. Nick especially was pissed at how I blew him off. While Mega had this disappointed yet angry look on his face.

I could tell he wanted to do something but held back due to our obvious differences right now. He may have more strength and speed but in terms of powers and abilities he knew I outclassed him in every aspect.

I then remembered I was talking to someone before so I called out to my new voice in my head.

"Hey Extenze Subscription you there?" I call out in my mind.

Hmm might be a bit too early for him to know that reference. Let's try...

"He hymen leaver you there?" Should be able to get that one right?

.......

Awwwwww! Apparently I won't be able to tease for a while. May need a new target as it seems to be quite fun.

"Welp people let's trudge on. Times a wasting and we need to go before that wall pops up!" I shout joyfully.

Of course I am happy. Who wouldn't be after successfully firing off one of their childhood idols signature attacks? Now if I can figure out the Kienzan then my life would be complete.

All the people begrudgingly followed me. They knew after all without me they were as good as dead. Although personally, I would've rated their chances higher without me.

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I filed back to the twins. "Say I have been wondering how in all nine hells did you two end up here of all places. I mean you two are technically Goddesses already. You should be able to manage something better than a bar in the fucking middle of some city in Russia." I ask.

They glance at each other then turn back to me. "We were hiding from War." They reply.

"Whoa. The hell Pet want with you two?"

"Pet?" They ask.

"Oh yea after I kicked her ass your grandmother keeps her on a leash and calls her Pet now."

Both of them look at me in complete shock. Then tears start running down their faces and they start laughing. Odd isn't that supposed to be reversed?

Seeing the two of them an Image of a woman pops into my head. It's the same woman from earlier who I was with at the park with my daughter. She tended to things in the wrong order constantly. One of which was eating a hotdog from the side. Gave me nightmares for a while that my "hotdog" would end up the same way. Bothered me to all hells.

The image and memories left my mind. I place my hand over my eyes and block out a headache.

"Damnit Darkness!" I hiss.

The twins look at me in confusion. I just wave at them to continue.

"We are going to have to ask grandma to let us "play" with Pet when we get there." They say darkly.

"Ok seriously what's up there. I know she killed you dad absorbed his power and all but why is she after you two?" I ask

"Simple she wants our power. She cannot fully control our fathers abilities, but since both of us hold a portion of his abilities she figures once she absorbs ours she will gain better control."

"Man she really is a bitch."

The twins shook their heads in amusement."As to why we chose this place. Well our father always liked this continent and liked the cold just as much. So we picked this place because it was both big and a distance away from other places."

"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"

A roar that shook the very air sounded out.

"Right well maybe we should run. It sounds like something bad may have come."

With that I Grabbed both twins tossed them over my shoulder and bolted. Completely not giving a damn about the others.

I know most of them live because Mega emerges with 8 people in tow. According to history. But honestly that roar sent a cold feeling through me and I did not want to deal with whatever the hell that was.

"Hey why are you leaving!? We need to stay with the others!" The twins shout and start struggling.

"Look I can tell you with absolute honesty that Mega gets them out. But that thing is probably going to come for me. So Unless you want more people to die I would stop squirming and hold on tight."

"Truly? They escape?" They ask.

I nod my head as I don't want them to notice any hesitation in my voice. Lying to women under stress is not a skill I am good at.

They stare at me for a sec then nod. I continue on at as fast a pace as I can push myself.

"Damn it if only I knew how to fucking fly!" I shout in frustration.

I dodge and weave through broken buildings and cars as I feel like something is getting closer. I see the end of town and a smile breaks out on my face. But as I am about to leave this horrid place I see it. I freeze in place and turn to it.

"Hello my beautiful. Don't worry daddy is going to take real good care of you."

I was of course talking to the black Countach LP500 that I saw when I first came to town. Somehow it was in perfect shape. Its former occupant seemed to die on the seat and blood was everywhere but I cam make do.

I placed down the twins and walked over. I layed my head down on the hood and started caressing the car.

"Oh baby daddy was so worried, but now everything will be okay. Daddy will put you in the shadows and take you home with him just hold on."

I started moving the shadows with every fiber of my being. Since I just used all my fox power and the ritual was limiting me I was exerting a huge amount of effort just calling the shadows.

"Hey girls somethings about to show up I need you guys to buy me sometime."

"For what!? A car!?" They reply.

"Your goddess damn right! This will be my car! And anyone who tries to stop me will die!" I said darkly.

The twins looked at me incredulously. At that moment thought the chill I felt finally arrived. I looked over and it was th bald speedster I sarcificed.

"Oh hey baldy. Sorry I will play with you in a bit just need to "acquire" this care and then we can play. Gotta admit though thought you died. How'd you manage that?" I ask while collecting shadows on the car.

"Foolish abomination! I shall purge you from my domain! For I am the god of chaos and evil. The god killer Abyss!" Baldy says.

Hmm might need to speed this up a bit. Well just try to stay alive girls.

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