《Lazy Ash》39.Chernobyl,Fantasy, and a little prick.
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The reason there has been no new chapters lately is because the other site where I generally post first went down and I lost a chapter and a half which still pisses me off.
It seems people like the man lessons which is surprising. As they were something I came up with on a whim. As for making a side chapter with them I am not entirely sure on whether I want to do that yet. Now that doesn't mean I won't it's just right now it doesn't feel right you could say. Anyway here's the next.
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Ash
"You have to be kidding me! Why the fuck would you send me to Chernobyl! I thought we were cool! That place is fucking suicide nowadays and you want to send me in the day before the disaster!?" I was freaking out there is no way to look at this positively.
"Now now it isn't all bad at least you will be going in with information."Rhea tries to calm me while both Chronos and Pet look at me with pity.
"Look! Even she pities me! Why not send her!? At least she has been inside Chernobyl. You are sending me into a place that is to this day walled off, has mounted auto turrents, and a team of world class supers on rotation year round guarding it! A place where the send the top supers in the world every five years and still not all of them make it back! Hell Pet herself has been on the team twice and she almost died both times!"
"Yes yes, I understand the dangers. The thing is though there is someone important there I need you to save." She replied.
"Look I know I owe you and hell I would normally pay you back but this is ridiculous! Lets say for arguments sake I do manage to find this person. How do you expect me to escape that place with humans!? Due to whatever is around that place 100 sq. miles of land drops every persons power down to the advanced state and every superpower takes far more out of you than normal. I would be hard pressed protecting myself!"
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"First off they are not humans. They are godlings and my granddaughters."She give me a look that borders begging.
Wait what!? Her granddaughters.....Nope hold on to the milf image doesn't matter hold on.......annnnnnnnnd okay gotta save her relatives. *Phew* almost lost the drive to keep hitting on her there. Hmmmm she said godlings?
"Wait why am I saving gods? Shouldn't they be able to save themselves?"
She looks at me and sighs."Normally yes and before you ask no we cant pull them out earlier. Gods are also limited there and the event is impossible to tamper with. So if someone was there their timeline is blocked up to that point. None of us know why its just how it is. As for saving gods? I said godlings. They haven't matured enough to become gods yet. They were born between a god and a demi-god. So while they will eventually become gods they still have to go through a lifespan of a hundred years before they become gods."
"I see...Wait if they event cant be tampered with even by gods how they hell am I going?"
All three of the people look at me and smile. Pets smile is a little smug like she's proud of something. Confused I look back and forth between them.
"What?"
Rhea looks at me and gives me an amused smile."Chronos your up."
I look at the little brat and keep my confused look. Seeing this he gives me a look that screams "idiot!"
"I thought you said this guy was a genius Rhea? Seems a little slow to me." The little bastard gives me a smirk. "Well since you humans dont understand time so to well I will explain it to you. You see time has focus point in which things cannot be altered the event at Chernobyl is one of them. Which means anyone we send has to be able to enter there. In fact the event pulls people and throws others out who are and aren't suppose to be there even through time itself. So that only leaves one conclusion."He then looks right at me.
.........................
"FUCK!"
I know exactly what that means. Even if I say no the event will take me there anyway since it seems I was there!
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"But that makes no sense! There's no situation in hell I would say yes! Not even if Rhea, Inari, and Alita were dressed in my fantasy cosplay outfits, lying together exposed on a bed, and telling me to dig in!"
His mouth drops open in shock. Then he gives a quick glance at Rhea who only has an amused look on her face and shakes his head."Name one time in any movie, anime, cartoon, or book time travel has ever made sense."
"Well there was.....Marty totally.......then there was......Goddess Damnit!" The little bastard was right.
This situation fucking sucks. I look at Rhea in defeat. "*Sigh* Fine tell me what I need to know."
Rhea gives me a pat on the shoulder and starts to explain."Alright from what we know and what I have gotten from Pet the place is in a word fucked. Monstrosities are everywhere. There is no true word to give them as not even we understand them. They have no apparent weakness but they can be killed. And you are going to want to kill on site! Next we are sending you in a day early to find the girls and hopefully get to a point where escape is easy. Now the two you are looking for are twins and are 22 years old. Their names are Rhedite and Itmera although for some reason the go by Raye and Mery.(I wonder why? Maybe because they were born on earth and their names would get them beat up?) Finally there is one last hiccup."
"Oh for the love of.....What!?"
"No need to get upset. It's just well we can't send you directly into Chernobyl so you are going to have to walk the last hundred miles." She gives me an apologetic smile.
At this point I shouldn't be surprised anymore. There has to be someone out there making so that anytime I get involved with women I am going to suffer in some way.
"Fine lets get this show on the road."
Chronos nods then throws a pocket watch on the floor. The watch springs open and starts spinning. It expands and then there is a giant clock on the floor in front of us. Chronos looks at me.
"Just jump in and you will land 100 miles outside Chernobyl in 1986." He says.
This is definitely a terrible idea. But at least this time I get to choose......Sorta. I give a look to Rhea and nod. As I step forward I am spun around and feel Rheas lips land on mine. Gotta admit was almost as good as punching Pet almost.
"For good luck and maybe we can make that fantasy of yours a reality."She whispers in my ear.
I stand there in a daze. Chronos got impatient and decides to kick me in at that point.
"Fuck you! You short little prick!" I scream at the last second.
In a blink I am falling through the air and see the ground fast approaching. I throw up a bubble shield and slam into the ground. A second later and that would've hurt.
"Fucking little bastard." I then look around and notice the landscape. "Man Ukraine sucked ass before and after huh. Oh wait its still Russia at this point right?"
I stand still for a moment when I realize I have no one to answer me."*Sigh* Well lets get this over with I mean how bad could it be?"
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Rhea
"Now was that necessary?"
Chrons turns and looks at me."Oh absolutely!" With that he smiles and walks away.
I shake my head and take a seat waiting for Ash's return. "Now Pet what should we do to pass the time?"
Pet just stares at me for a moment. "Why wait the kid is going to die. Plain and simple. Maybe if he had the kitsune and the angel still he may have had a chance but now? No he is fucked which means you wont get to fuck- FUCCCCCCCCKKKK!" I activate her collar.
I dont wont to admit it but his chances aren't great but he is the only hope I have to save the last remnant of my son left in the universe.
"Please save them boy."
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