Truly wondrous! I mean how exciting can this get?! I was currently sat down at a table near the corner of the inn’s dining area, having just rented two rooms, one for guys and one for the girl. I had a clear overview of the entire area and was enjoying a medium rare steak of a magical bovine beast. As I was savouring the new flavours and seasonings of the dish, a great contrast to the plain food typically served at the church, a great commotion broke out.

A group of four thugs from what it looked like had made their way up to the inn’s counter, and began to harass the owner. To think there would be a day when I saw such a scene, it was exactly like those novels I often read to pass the time. It would be just perfect if they asked for his daughter as compensation for some fabricated wrong doing by the inn keeper.

As my thoughts started to stray towards the numerous books I had read in my spare time, a young girl came out of the back door behind the counter, leading to the kitchen area. Most likely she had come to see what the commotion was about. She was of about 16 years of age and had short brown hair and green eyes, quite the looker in my opinion. Now that I think about it she has some resemblance to the portly inn keeper… No way.

“Father, is something the matter?” She asked the inn keeper in a timid voice.

Her gaze darted towards the thugs who had settled their eyes, now full of what I can only assume is lust, on her slender but well-proportioned body. It’s actually happening! For me to be so lucky to see such a famous scenario.

“Hey, old man! If ya give us da girl fer a night, we’ll let ya off fer causin’ us so much grief” said thug1.

“Yeah old man! Dis establishment here wouldn’t want any trouble would it?” said thug2.

“Dis girl here would be a good apology for the shite you call food dat we was served here.” said thug3.

“Don’t blame us for getting upset if yer don’t give us a proper apology old man!” said thug4.

The now terrified young girl quickly hid behind her father as he tried to appease the thugs, promising them free food and rooms for as long as they like, and even offering them a substantial amount of money. But the thugs were dead set on getting the girl it would seem.

Personally I would have gone of the money. Don’t they know that if they were to go to the city, they could purchase a night with 4 decent prostitutes with that amount of silver? Maybe I should offer the inn keeper some help in exchange for a decent reward. No! I need to restrain myself, this should be the part where a hero gallantly arrives to aid the innkeeper and his daughter.

Ah here it comes! Wait a moment… he looks familiar. At this moment in time I noticed the empty seat on my right. I proceeded to let out a sigh. Looks like retard will go to their rescue. If that was going to be the case, I should have intervened for some extra cash. Mister righteousness over there won’t accept anything after all. He’ll probably say something idiotic, like it was his duty as a knight.

As the thugs noticed him striding towards the counter they immediately became more guarded. After all, even though he didn’t have his full plate armour on, he was still an intimidating figure, with his well-developed muscles clearly visible underneath his shirt. The shirt is tight enough for them to be visible because it’s mine. The idiot didn’t bring any spare sets of clothes, and he could hardly wear the kiddo’s clothes.

“What do yer want?” asked thug1, his hand slowly drifting towards his sheathed dagger.

“It is disgraceful for people to behave in such a way. Cease this unsightly display at once!” replied the retard sternly.

“Wha?” said thug2, 3 &4 simultaneously.

It would seem he used to many difficult words for them. Thug1 seemed to get the gist though and responded by lunging towards retard with his dagger unsheathed. Quite a nice surprise attack, but unfortunately Gant is a highly trained holy knight, and one considered a genius at that.

Gant grabbed the wrist of thug1 with ease, crushing it in his hand before proceeding to knock out all 4 thugs in the space of about 2 seconds. It looked like he was just lightly tapping them of the head, but anyone even a little competent with magic could see that he’d infused enough magical energy into his blows to make each tap feel like the blow of a hammer.

Humorously all the thugs fell into one big pile, out cold. Mary then ran up from the table to Gant.

“Gant, are you okay?! That was so awesome how you beat all those bad people! You were like bambambambam and all of them went down!” excitedly chattered Mary.

“It was nothing.” said Gant.

“Thank you! Thank you so much! Please take this as a reward. I really can’t thank you enough!” clamoured the innkeeper, thrusting out the sack of money towards Gant.

“No, I cannot accept such a reward, I was only fulfilling my duty as a knight.” replied Gant, his eyes ablaze with righteousness.

Called it.

“At least have your meals on the house.” insisted the innkeeper.

Gant after some deep thought eventually gave his consent to such an arrangement with a nod. After which he turned to the daughter.

“Are you alright?” he asked, concern evident in his voice.

“Y-yes, I’m okay. Really thank you very much. If there’s anything I can do to repay you just let me know” replied a slightly flustered innkeeper’s daughter.

Looks like she fell victim to his charm, and if I’m not mistaken that last sentence was almost an invitation. Those upturned eyes when she said it and bright red ears gave the game away.

“No, as I said before it was simply my duty” replied the dense fuck.

The daughter seemed rather disappointed but quickly returned to the kitchen while Gant and Mary made their way back to the table.

“Hey Cyne! Wasn’t Gant awesome back there?!” exclaimed a still excited Mary

“Hmm? Yeah, as expected of a holy knight, you do your profession proud.” I replied somewhat absentmindedly.

I was still lamenting over the lost opportunity of gaining some extra cash. Gant however seemed extremely pleased by my response going on to talk about how holy knights were expected to do such things while Mary listened attentively. Suddenly my ever present smile widened.

There was still an opportunity for money! Those thugs would probably just cause problems in the future and killing them wasn’t exactly an option… unless you’re an inspector, hehehe. I excused myself, saying that I wanted to make sure everything was alright with innkeeper now that the trouble had been dealt with. I proceeded quickly to the counter, ignoring the admiration in the gazes of my comrades.

“Hello, I see you already met my companions over there and I thought I would just make my way over to introduce myself. I’m Cyne, it’s a pleasure” I began.

I held out my hand as a greeting which the innkeeper gladly took, giving it a strong shake. We had met before when I had ordered the rooms but no pleasantries were exchanged.

“It’s nice to meet you too lad! Can’t believe how lucky I was for your friend over there to be here to intervene” said the innkeeper happily.

“It was truly fortuitous, but I am concerned that these fellows may cause trouble in the future” I continued.

I gestured towards the pile of bodies yet to be removed from the establishment. In response to my ‘concerns’ the innkeeper immediately paled, realising that the future was still somewhat grim. Smiling even wider now, I leaned forward and whispered into his ear.

“It would be truly beneficial if they turned out to be heretics you know. After all, I’m an inspector myself and would love to be able to both help you out and fulfil my role as devotee to our lord, Sol.”

As I said this I eyed the pouch of silver he had been planning to give to the thugs. Luckily the fellow caught on quickly, discreetly handing me the pouch. He looked somewhat upset at the loss of money but relieved that his problems were going to go away.

I strode over to the bodies pretending to inspect them, after which I miraculously found a pendant that held the symbol for some old pagan god of nature in their pockets. Hehehe, good thing I always keep this thing at hand. I let my smile lessen and said one word.

“Heretics”

The entire inn seemed to freeze. Multiple people looked over to where I was. My voice while soft had carried through the entire establishment, and despite my casual attire, many quickly realised my occupation as I inspected the pagan pendant dangling before my eyes. My smile turned cruel, fitting to my role, and I dragged the unconscious bodies outside.

Now decision, decisions. How should I burn them alive? Magic? No that’s too easy. Let’s build a pyre! This really is my favourite part of the job. Others tend to avoid becoming inspectors due to this duty, but there’s just something comforting about burning people alive. I instructed nearby villagers to construct the pyre out of fire wood and straw.

The residents of the village quickly went about it. Disobeying an inspector in his righteous act of sending heretics to Sol was widely known to have dire consequences. In just half an hour a pyre was constructed. I then bound all the bodies to the pyre using some of my rope supply I had taken from my luggage and set the thing aflame with my trusty old flint. This was my first time burning people alive outside the church! They used to bring us pre-bound heretics to practice on, but I can honestly say the real thing feels much better.

The thugs quickly woke up after the heat began to burn them, and soon they began to scream and beg for mercy. Didn’t they know that this was mercy? I was sending them to Sol, if they weren’t heretics they needn’t fear that their souls be burnt to ashes before his divinity. Surprisingly, my two comrades hadn’t actually noticed the commotion. How oblivious can you get?

Hehehe. I started to whistle a tune. It was a sad and slow tune, I recall my mother used to whistle the very same tune quite often back when our family was whole. It was rather beautiful, and as a child I had begged here to teach me how to whistle that beautiful tune as well, although some could argue that amidst the screams it was a tad eerie.