Without a Doubt, Work Never Ceases. (22.1)

…

“So, you’re really here to stay.” As far as new accommodations went, the Apollo Familia’s former castle was pretty great. While it didn’t meet up to the strict standards I had of actual castles, which no god would probably live within if they had the choice, it was the very height of comfort. Mage lights were aplenty, it was aired out, the kitchen was fully outfitted, and there was a bathhouse inside it. Overall, it was a step up from living in an Inn, even if I did have to start cooking for far too many people every morning. Which I was currently doing. “I keep thinking that I’d wake up and find you gone again, Sensei.”

“I caused too much trouble the first time around, Arde.” I kept close attention to the food I was making. No rice cooker meant I had to make it with a pot. The fish heated in the oven while I simmered the miso soup. The salad was just some lightly pickled cabbage. The tea was cooling down at the table. Very simple as far as breakfasts went, only toast and jam could be simpler, but it was nutritious and filling. I turned to my Pallum student who had her arms crossed. “Good morning to you too, by the way.”

“Hmph, too much trouble for yourself or for us?” Arde, where did this passive aggressiveness come from? Oh, right. Me. Damn you, past self. You always make things more difficult for me and my future self. Also, again, sorry future self. This’ll never change. I finished folding the omelet into rolls, took pride in my Dex stat, and plated it and waited for it to cool. Seriously, there should be a Cooking Skill. Wait, that sounded suspiciously too much like some LN “trash” Skill that was actually the “best” skill. Nevermind. I set Arde’s food before her with all the precision and care I could muster. Which is quite a bit given my Stats. “Until you apologize for doing it, I won’t be convinced you don’t intend to do it again—”

“I’m sorry for leaving you all and going mad.” There, I said what I should’ve already said. Arde went quiet and still, her mouth still open as I had interrupted her. When my Pallum student suddenly levelled a glare at me, looking at me for any deceit, I answered in the only way I knew how: I shrugged. “When have I ever lied to you?” Her eyes narrowed further; answers were rising from the back of her mind. I coughed aside and turned my attention back to cooking. I should really try to make curry. “I mean, when have I ever lied to you about something as serious as this?”

“…Promise me, then. That you won’t try to leave us behind and sacrifice yourself again.” Those words were familiar. No. I was sure that they were almost exactly the same words Laulos had said to me after I’d rescued Cranel and woken from my coma. If I were the same person then, I would’ve been able to stay silent and promise nothing. However, this time around, the urge to do so wasn’t as strong as before. Arde, Cranel, Nelly… people do what they do because they think it’s right. Was I afraid that Arde could die trying to protect me? Yes. Definitely. Could I stop her from doing so? Again, yes. Should I? No. “Sensei—”

“Alright, I promise.” Arde’s jaw shut with an audible clack. I waited for a moment for my Pallum student to say something. However, I decided to speak again after I produced the fish from the oven. Cooking was surprisingly relaxing. Movement, timing, and preparation all in one. It took up mental space quickly and stayed there, while also making sure I couldn’t just blitz through everything. The rest of the fish were about ready to be taken out of the oven. I needed a grill. How much did charcoal cost? See, just like that. Basically, I was training my Househusband Skills and keeping my mind on the straight and narrow, it was an absolute victory in every sense of the word! “Now eat before your food gets cold.”

There was a sudden shuffling of the seat and a shadow settled over me. Turning my gaze away from the oven as I crouched, I met Arde’s gaze equally for the first time. There was a storm of emotions on my Pallum student’s face. Disbelief. Relief. Trust. Curiosity. I honestly didn’t know how I could’ve convinced myself that she was some unimportant side character of some shitty light novel. All I could see was a girl who was confused, who didn’t know what to do, and who was… struggling to not cry.

Taking off the oven mitt I’d been wearing, I placed my bare hand on her head. Komachi, on the day I’d come back from the hospital, had latched onto my side, bawled, and demanded I don’t allow her to find herself alone when she got back home. I’d made a promise to never do that again that day. The more I thought about the promise I’d made, the more it seemed like I’d betrayed my sister. However, I did my best to think past my memories and try to imagine what Komachi would actually say to me if she were here. I placed my bare hand atop Arde’s head and comforted her through her tears.

“Gomennasai, Arde.” I was able to mutter the right word, despite how hard it was to say. I would give everyone a chance to convince me to stay. That was what I had said. That meant I couldn’t continue simply ignoring what was in front of me. I couldn’t ignore how much everyone cared. “You shouldn’t have even had to ask.”

Arde’s hands reached out and held onto the side of my shirt as though she needed me to stand.

The food was cold when she started to eat.

…

“Neh, Sensei, are we going to do something about the army outside Orario?” Cranel, thankfully, learned a thing or two and wasn’t speaking while his mouth was full. Apollo’s dining table was barely filled up with Hestia’s Familia. The Amazons, the Runarl, Arde, Yamato, and Cranel made up a Familia about nine in number while the table was meant for around fifty individuals. Quality was better than quantity in my honest opinion, so the Familia was officially in that sweet spot where they were decently skilled and had had decent numbers. Overall, the Hestia Familia was a force to be reckoned with now. “I mean, they’re not causing any trouble without any Level 4s, but should we really just leave them alone?”

“Would you leave a minotaur alone just because it can’t hurt you, brat?” Chopstick pointing was looked down upon in modern society. Thankfully, this wasn’t a modern society, so I was free to point my chopsticks at someone while I made a point. Holding a bowl of rice in one hand and pointing with chopsticks with the other, I utilized Lecture Pose Number 12 to great effect since cultural cost of doing so was nullified by the world’s status. In short, I did it because I could. “Of course we’re not going to ignore them. Even if they’re not even blocking trade, we can’t exactly let them get prestige by letting them say they got away scot free after threatening us.”

“When a small tribe gets uppity, it’s up to the better ones to teach them their place.” Aisha Belka mused over her food by the Runarl’s side. I couldn’t exactly place a name on the Runarl. Haru? Sanju? Harusanju? Kawasaki? Pfft. Yeah, right. No one went by Kawasaki. Anyway, the two had been friends in the Ishtar Familia. Though I’d been caught up in training the Barbelas, along with making a corporation from scratch, I had some memories of actually talking to Belka. Most of it was my body just passively listening to whatever my “guards” talked to me about, so naturally I knew more about their lives than I would’ve liked. “Otherwise, if everyone thinks you’re weak, you’ll find yourself surrounded by enemies. Enemies you’ll have to crush. It’s in everyone’s best interest that this “Rakia” is dealt with decisively and memorably.”

Before everyone could start putting in their ideas, or looking confused and cute like the Runarl always did, I cleared my throat and clapped my hands together.

“My current plan for dealing with Rakia involves lightning. A lot of lightning. Probably in Rakia’s general direction.” It was a good plan. Real simple. Not very many moving parts. I would walk to the wall which surrounds the city, say a few lines, and literally conduct a “blitzkrieg” on Ares’s hobby. Simple, efficient, and easy. Overall, the perfect job for me to do while Loki, Hestia, Hecate, Hermes, and Dionysus attended their month-long meeting and discussion with Ouranos. “Consider it all your assignment to find a way to kick them out without having me do that. Whoever manages it before the end of the month gets a million Valis. You can work together, but the prize will be split among you and your teammates” I could just solve the issue by myself, but what was the point of that? This was a perfect opportunity for me to teach some leadership skills… and find out if anyone present could actually lead. “Oh and Cranel, you’re only allowed to be a leader or do it entirely by yourself. You can’t just follow someone. I’ll know if you do. Also, this is mandatory for you.”

“Why am I singled out, Sensei!?” Cranel, you may not realize this, but you are in desperate need of a spine. I know I’m not one to talk, but you literally have a half a dozen or more women willing to follow your lead. You need to be able to lead and not be led. Also, I’ve lost track of all the people who are interested in you. Please recruit all of your main Harem so that I can get in all their good books and stay away from them. I don’t want any shitty love triangles popping up between me and a girl—I mean that as in a girl taking interest in me and you, not me competing with a girl for you, got it!? “Why do I have to do it and everyone else can choose not to—”

“Because you don’t have any leadership qualities whatsoever and it’s about time you started getting some.” My answer was simple, succinct, and had Cranel ready to object… only to close his mouth. My albino student took a breath, thought for a moment, readied himself to say something with a finger raised… and then went silent again. He bit at his index finger, his mind racking itself over for a situation where he had actually led people instead of following instructions or throwing himself at the situation, and I knew that he found himself completely lacking. I spoke again as he pressed his hands against his forehead and began muttering. “Yep, brat, no matter how you look at it, you’ve got a long way to go until you can call yourself the leader of the Hestia Familia.”

“Eh?” Cranel looked about the table. For a few moments, my albino student could only stare at everyone gathered around him and where he actually was. Wide-pan shot, building motivational music, and a cut to him smiling at the camera. Well, if there was a camera. No, Bell Cranel decided to smile at me. “Hai, Sensei.” He bowed his head once. The smile was still on his face when he looked up. “I’ll be in your care.”

Naturally.

I mean, who else can deal with you?

…

Without a Doubt, Work Never Ceases. (22.2)

…

Whoever designed the Dungeon was a lazy prick. The initial levels were just tunnels, caverns, a petrified forest, and then a whole crystal theme for the Floors before Under Resort. For a giant, underground monster incubator, you’d think that there would be some interesting locations to visit. However, that wasn’t the case. Floors after that could just be generalized into the average video game smattering of stages. There were forest stages, lava stages, frost stages, and water stages. Sure, in real life, they were incredibly deadly, but there wasn’t anything memorable about it!

There weren’t any puzzles to figure out, shortcuts to use, or events where you had to sneak around. I mean, sure, that makes it easy for expeditions to pass through and ensures Familias don’t have to worry about their supply lines, but it was incredibly boring to be able to just torch everything with lightning, pry out monster crystals, and then walk down into one jungle inside a cave after another. Sure there were Monster Pantries, Green Dragons, and areas where monsters would ambush you, but those were side objectives! They didn’t need to be dealt with! Ergo, they were just tacked on additions that didn’t really make the Dungeon anything special!

In short, though I’d expected to relax and find some interesting things in the 20th and 30th Floors of the Dungeon, all I found were just boring monsters with a gimmick or two, and I spent most of my time just looking for places to farm monsters. Sure, I appreciated the fact that my old tactics which netted me millions of Valis a day were now drawing in triple the original amount, but there wasn’t exactly anything… grand about the situation. I was overqualified and over-levelled for the area, true, but shouldn’t there still be challenges for me to face? Actual interesting monsters to fight?

Hobgoblins were interesting, but they were just buffed up versions of the runts I killed by just kicking them at Level 1, meaning that I easily did the same with them. The Lizardmen used tools made from the Dungeon’s materials, and even nets made of vines from the trees, but they were just a direct upgrade from the orcs. Not a threat. Boring even. The poisonous mushrooms, giant insects, and floating eyeballs were freaky at first, but I was essentially the world’s biggest bug zapper. None of them were a threat if they were burnt to a crisp. Firebirds were just flying hellhounds with double the rate of fire; i.e. still not fast enough to not die to lightning.

My students, bless whoever taught them to be so diligent in their notetaking (me), provided me with all the movement lists and attacks each monster had available, meaning that their only hope of hurting me, which was the element of surprise, was completely beyond their reach.

When I left, there was the whole issue with the difficulty spiking because the Dungeon wanted to keep me down and kill me, but it was a non-issue. Sure, if I were a regular mage I would’ve died after going solo so deeply into the Dungeon, but that wasn’t the case for me. Even if the Dungeon had sent three times all the monsters I’d killed, I still wouldn’t have been threatened in the least.

Overall, I ended up with two bags filled with drops and monster cores when I decided to make my way back up to the surface. I had to ditch the lesser valued items into caches set up by Arde and the others, refill the bags with more valued drops, and lug an absolutely ludicrous number of bags up to the surface.

Enough bags to actually get caught in the door frame of the Guild.

Yep, definitely, I wasn’t going back into the Dungeon without a student (pack mule) to help me out.

…

I placed the bag of a million Valis on the table. While there were plenty of bound bills in it, I’d intentionally asked for a few rolls of coins. The “pomf” that the bag made on the table was very satisfying. Also, I just achieved my childhood dream of carrying around a burlap sack filled with money. There was no green Yen symbol on it anywhere, but nothing is perfect. I was happy with what I could get.

“Hikigaya, if you damaged my table, you’re paying for it!” The silence of my delivery was easily broken by Grande’s loud voice. While most of the customers at the Hostess of Fertility decided to turn back to their meals, a few looked at the sack with greedy eyes. I made sure to meet the gaze of each one that did. They all backed down. Man, it sure was nice to have a reputation. “You better get that thing off the table before my girls put the food down!”

I waved Grande’s worries off and focused on the individuals gathered before me.

“There’s the prize money.” Some of the Hestia Familia were drinking the frothy beer that the Hostess served, but I stuck with water. Sometimes I had cider, but for the most part the water in Orario was clean thanks to the incredible sewage system. No need to worry about contamination as a cause of disease here. You’re more likely to be killed instead of dying from any sort of sickness! I took my seat and took a sip of the cooled water I’d been provided. “Cranel, if you don’t win it, you’ll owe me a million Valis.”

“Eh, I get punished if I don’t win!?” Yes, indeed. Losing doesn’t mean anything if you don’t lose anything. That doesn’t make sense. Life isn’t fair. Yadda, yadda. I’m hungry. I’ll grouse about life later. Food comes first. My breakfast lasted quite a bit, as expected of a meal meant to keep farmers full, but I doubted my stomach had enough space to store enough food to keep me going. Nourish worked fine, of course, but it didn’t replace food. “That isn’t fair, Sensei!”

“Life isn’t fair, brat. Also, before you complain anymore, life isn’t difficult. You’re just not very good at it.” Sitting next to Arde, I checked my Pallum student for any injuries before handing over my notebook to her. It was technically my copy of her experiences in Floors 20 to 30, but I considered it mine because I corrected a few mistakes and added some new passages. Yep, you may have written 95% percent of that book, but by law you have to put my name in as a co-author! Of course, that means Zaimokuza can only call himself a co-author for literally everything he’s ever written (lol).“So, anyone else actually going for this prize? Or are you all just going to leave the fate of Orario in Cranel’s incapable hands?”

“Hey, I heard that “Incapable” you said right there, Sensei!”

“You were meant to, brat.”

“Well, I suppose me and the girls need some new clothes for Spring.” What exactly do you intend to wear, Belka-san. You barely wear anything for winter! What the hell are you going to be wearing for spring!? I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but this is a PG-13 environment save for the fight scenes! Yeah, that’s right! Girls aren’t allowed to show anything besides skin, but you’re free to decapitate people! The leader of the Barbelas tapped at her chin. “Hmmm, why not? I suppose it’s about time the girls and I did something besides look intimidating or kill monsters.”

“I will find a way to deal with the Rakia army, Sensei.” Arde gave me a nod. My Pallum student gave Cranel a pointed look. Was that a smirk on your face? Was that for the terrible things you intended to do the army? Or for the defeat you’re going to render unto Cranel? Well, since the former would lead to the latter, I supposed it would be safe to say she was thinking smiling about the first. You can’t lose a guessing game if you take both possible outcomes! What do you mean that’s cheating? “Erisuis and Nelly have elected to fight by my side.”

“…Yama-chan… please tell me you’re helping me.” Cranel, seeing this immediately turned to his Yamato Nadeshiko. I considered the situation carefully. Hmmm, yes, indeed. You chose poorly just a few days ago Cranel. Hmmm, yes, do you remember exactly who you latched onto the moment she entered the hot spring resort? Why yes, indeed, you chose a certain Sword Princess who is currently in the Dungeon farming for money. Ah, I see that you’re still weak against the formidable Skill known as the Cold Shoulder. “Yama-chan? Yama-chan, eh?”

Don’t worry Cranel, she’s just playing hard to get. When Wallenstein elects to help you, Yamato will latch onto you faster than Zaimokuza can attack a plate of dango. Well, maybe. That tubby bastard can move really quick if there’s food involved. It was probably one of his 3 Zaimokuza Skills. The other two are, of course, being able to ignore being stared at in disgust and rebounding from critics. All three are double-edged swords. The first made the tubby bastard a tubby bastard, the second convinced him being odd was okay, and the third was terrible because he never learned. Hey, look at that, I can avoid calling him the shitty author of this world by just calling him a shitty person!

“Though I risk sounding obvious, I’ll go ahead and say that you can’t exactly be a leader without anyone following you, Cranel.” The food sure was taking a bit of time to come. I supposed that serving around ten people was different from four or five. When was the last time I actually ate at the Hostess of Fertility anyway? Maybe I was just being hungry, but I was seriously looking forward to eating one of the absurdly large meals Grande prided herself in making. Crossing my arms, I went through my head for any advice I could give to my floundering student. “Hmmm, have you considered making friends?”

“Sensei, how can you be so mean!?”

Ah, oops, teehee.

“Don’t act cute, it’s just scary when you try!”

Hey, those sort of words hurt, y’know!?

“Ah, Bell-kun!” There was a sudden shift in the wind, a moment where something truly unexpected occurred. Cranel as I knew him disappeared and was replaced by the creature known as a Harem Protagonist. One moment we were conversing like two normal individuals and the next he was being smothered in marshmallow hell. Oh yeah, Flova existed. I forgot about her, teehee. Looks like Yamato will be joining the battle before Wallenstein offers aid to my albino student. “Mou, how could you leave for so long! My, my you’ve grown though!” The friendliest waitress of the whole café, which really wasn’t an achievement, pulled away from Cranel with a beatific smile on her features that swiftly turned to a pout. “Y’know, I made you a lot of lunches you never picked up! Even if you’re a great warrior, you still have to eat! You can’t fight on an empty stomach!”

At that moment, as soon as those words left Flova’s mouth, the Harem Protagonist disappeared and the tactician I was struggling to summon came forth. Woah, amazing, was this what they called a moment of clarity!? Wait. The moment of clarity came from him being smothered in a woman’s chest! Dammit, the Harem Protagonist side of Cranel was actually the tactician as well!? How the hell was I supposed to call that being forth on demand!?

“Ah, Syr, you’re the best!” Cranel abruptly returned the attack. Given my student’s usual density, the counterattack caught the waitress off guard! It was a critical hit! Flova is down and cannot defend herself! Please be merciful, Harem Protagonist! “I’ll make the whole of Rakia feel the same as I did during my first months of Orario!” Uh, that smile and that determination is quite scary with the words you’re saying, brat. “I’ll starve them out by taking away all their supplies!”

Unexpectedly, my student had a cruel side.

Oxymoronic thought the phrase might be, it was a pleasant surprise.

…

Without a Doubt, Work Never Ceases. (22.3)

…

On paper, or just aloud, the plan of “starving the whole army” seemed pretty great. Adventurers ate a stupendous amount of food. Not enough to justify the insane powers they had, but still a stupid amount for regular people. One serving of food for an Adventurer was enough for three normal people. Naturally, that meant an army of Adventurers would eat as much as three armies. By all means, most countries couldn’t afford to sustain one, let alone three, armies. Of course, that meant that Rakia was a bigger threat than it appeared, because there had to be more than a few countries backing it.

Actual history surrounding Rakia is limited. They fight wars against nations using Adventurers. The average soldier was a Level 2 with the Officers being Level 3. Generals were Level 4. The “High Commander” was Level 5. Ergo, the Loki Familia could kick all their asses across the border and back in a single afternoon. So could the Ganesha and Freya Familias. Given that the latter two were barely involved in the plot, I had a feeling that those two were the ones who would end up dealing with the issue, but I wasn’t the kind of person to leave things to chance (anymore).

If you want something done right, you do it yourself. If you’re too lazy to do it, and it’s really just a pain to do, delegate it to someone who you think is decent and it might pan out. Given that I had three individuals who I thought were decent at approaching problems, I supposed that there was an alright that I wouldn’t have to start casting lightning in the general direction of a whole army. Like, maybe, there was a ten percent chance I wouldn’t have to do anything. Those odds may seem low, but a ten percent chance of doing nothing is better than a 100% chance of having to do something!

Anyway, I was actually hoping all three groups would work together. While Cranel was obviously going to investigate and wait for Wallenstein, he could get started if he decided to actually think and speak with Belka or Arde. Sure there was a snowball’s chance in hell that Arde would accept Cranel as a leader, but it could happen. Since I didn’t plan on doing anything to the Rakia army until a week before the gods returned, Cranel had a decent chance of recruiting Wallenstein and winning within that time period. By all means, my albino student was in the clear to win; there was no way he’d lose, even with two other competitors fighting for the same prize.

Naturally, that was unfair, so I evened the odds a bit.

…

Cranel was the last to enter the Hestia Familia’s new home. My albino student took one step through the threshold before collapsing onto the rug. Oi, brat, that’s expensive and hard to get ash out of! Get off it before I have to spend an hour cleaning it! Out of the rug, you dirty miscreant! Get out! Here, enjoy the cool tiled floor instead!

“Sensei…” Cranel groaned into tiled floor while Belka and Arde continued their glaring at me. Well, the Amazon glared at me. Arde was pretty much just staring around me and doing her best to remember my teaching styles. Yes, my Pallum student, your hell has returned. You are back to being my student. Prepare yourself for the worst you can think of, because that’ll be the mere starting point of your training. “Did… did you happen to inform the whole of Rakia about our plans?”

“The first rule of being a leader is knowing who to trust, brat.” I brushed the soot and grime off the rug. Who puts rugs this expensive in front of the door, anyway?! This shit should be tying a room together! It’s not something you’re supposed to have as a doormat! Damn gods! Rugs in this day and age can take years to make! Show people some respect! Wait, I was doing something important, right? “You all told me your plans after I told you I’d deal with the whole army myself. Doesn’t that outright say that I’m also out to win this competition?” Also, I got reward money for telling Rakia all about your plans. I’m making money off this either way! Thanks for that! “Obviously, you shouldn’t tell your competition your plans, y’know?”

Cranel groaned some more into the tiles. Belka kept glaring. Arde was experiencing flashbacks of the first lessons we had together. Everything was going nicely as expected.

“So, what are you all going to do now?” I inquired after brushing off the last of the soot from the rug. Yeah, I was definitely going to move that into the living room. Better to sweep mud off tiles than off rugs. Wait, could I make a platform for shoes here? Make these western castles somewhat sane to live in? Maybe a coat rack? Yeah, that could work. Yes. I got it. For the next two weeks I’ll be remodeling this castle! A vacation from fighting! Just laying around being worthless while cooking and redecorating took up my mind! It was the perfect plan? “Hmmm? Nothing? Wow. The three of you can learn. How surprising.”

“I planned to be the victor in this competition for money alone, Hikigaya. However, now I’ll win simply to wipe that smirk off your face.” Smirk? What smirk? Me? Smirking? My lips crooking upward? That never happens. You may need to get your eyes checked, Belka. Or your head. You might be becoming delusional. Belka rose from her chair, gave a “hmph” and made her way towards the dorms where the rest of the Barbelas were. What exactly are you going to do? Seduce them to death? I’ll have you know this world is Pg-13, lady! “Amazons have toppled whole armies before. It’s practically cultural tradition at this point to take down men who think far too highly of themselves.

Just men? That sure is sexist lady. I, for one, believe that anyone or anything that thinks too highly of themselves should be taken down. #Equality. #HikigayaforPrimeMininster.

“I…I must speak with Nelly and Erisuis.” Arde took her leave with all the grace of a prisoner told they’re going off to a mining camp. Unlike Belka and Cranel, who should really know better, my Pallum student knew what was coming. Though she didn’t know what exactly was going to occur, she had enough experience to know it wouldn’t be pleasant. Ganbatte, Arde. At the very least, the three of you aren’t my prime focus. Making her way to the door, she raised her dead gaze towards my face. “…Are you going to be spying on us, Sensei?”

I said nothing.

And, by doing that, I told her everything.

Arde walked through the threshold of the castle downcast. Neh, Arde. It isn’t raining. Why do you look so glum? You know I’m just doing this for your own sake, right? You can’t go through life in Orario without knowing how to lead! Look at this soot-covered, smoking young man laying against the tiles quietly weeping. Do you want to be like him? Well, even if you do, I don’t want you to waste your life being like him. I’m harsh to you only because I need to be! Also, because it’s funny, but that’s beside the point. One day, you’ll get to do this to someone else! Take heart in the fact that you can one day use this knowledge to crush hopes and dreams like I do for the sake of making yourself happy. Wait. That sounded way too sad!

Speaking of sad things, I turned toward Cranel.

He was still lying on the floor covered in soot and smoking.

“So, what did we learn today, brat?” I took a seat in one of the armchairs of the living room. Though the sofas looked comfy, I was unsure if they were thoroughly cleaned. While it was likely some manner of deviance and fetishism occurred upon the armchair, the sofa was guaranteed to have had some unspeakable acts done upon it. In short, I deduced that, while there was a fifty-fifty chance some manner of debauchery occurred on the armchair, the sofa had definitely been a den of sin and sodomy. Possibly literally given the amount of pretty boys in the Apollo Familia. “How did your first day “starving a whole army” go?”

“…” Cranel glared at me after removing his face from the tile. Ah, my pure heart has been shattered. How could you render such a cruelty upon me, Cranel? I’ve been nothing but kind and considerate towards you! Do you remember that time I stopped you from doing something you’d regret? I just pulled you off your Familia’s expensive rug before you ruined it, y’know!? We’ve been through so much together! How can you treat me like this (lol)? “You’re a terrible person, Sensei.”

“What exactly does that make you if you keep falling for it, brat? You’ve got to think things through and learn so you can get better.” I pointed out the obvious facts. Once again, allow me to reiterate, life is unfair and a challenge. However, that is all it is. Going through life is as much of a skill as reading or writing. You can be competent at it and be barely happy, or you can train and actually enjoy it. Look at me, I’m enjoying life right now! “If you can’t manage to outsmart me, you’re in for a really tough time, y’know? I’m not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed, y’know? You’ve got to up your game unless you want to be taken advantage of, y’knnnoooowwww?”

“Are you making fun of me or trying to help!?”

“Why not both?”

“So you are making fun of me!?”

“Obviously.”

I shook my head and laughed. There were a lot of thoughts running through my mind. They were building up. My worries and concerns were slowly becoming monumental and harder to carry. All I could do was distance myself from them until I put on the amulet and cleared my mind of any thoughts before I awoke. I couldn’t imagine how I’d functioned without the amulet. It was daunting to just watch my worries grow over the course of several hours. I’d harbored most of my problems for more than two years, waking up and carrying them every day, until I wised up and actually did something about it. Now, it was actually possible for me to just take two or three weeks just… resting.

And that was all thanks to Cranel and everyone else.

“Hey, Cranel.”

“…Hai, Hikigaya-sensei?”

I wasn’t very good at the whole talking business. I wasn’t good at communicating in general. Between sullen silence and passive aggressive comments, I wasn’t at all someone anyone would want to talk to. Being the “good” person, the one who was always cheerful and kind, just wasn’t me. That wasn’t the person who I was. I could try to be that person, but that would be the same as hiding away who I was. I chose to act as I did so others wouldn’t try to get to know me, be disappointed by the truth, and leave. It was better for people to just know the truth and leave at the start, instead of finding out later and leaving after I knew them.

That’s why I treated Cranel and everyone else like I did, yet in the end they still saved me.

“Thanks for saving me.”

Even though I wouldn’t have saved a person like me, they did.

“…You’d have done the same for me, Sensei.”

Without a doubt, that was the case.

…

Interlude: The Student (Part 8)

…

Sensei was starting to look better. I didn’t know if it was the spa, or if it was just because he was eating well, but he was starting to look healthy. Sensei was always on the thin side with cheeks that were almost sullen, deep eyes, and pale skin. With the few flecks of white in his hair, he really looked old. I’d thought he was joking about being just two years older than me, but I no longer doubted that was the case. When he began to force himself to actually rest, eat, and relax, he changed a lot.

My grandfather told me rest and relaxation with good company were important parts of life, but I didn’t expect it to be so effective! Sensei was really starting to look a lot younger, especially since he was actually going out unarmored and unarmed. Well. Mostly unarmed. I was sure he had knives somewhere on his body, and he could use Magic. Still, seeing him wearing “regular clothes” was strange. Though he could be doing it just so people wouldn’t recognize him, I was sure it was a good sign he wasn’t dressed for battle wherever he went!

I was getting used to seeing Sensei be “normal” though. Having him cook breakfast every day, clean, and greet us when we got back was strange at first, especially since he told us all he was resting, but I guessed that Sensei needed a routine to get his mind off things when he wasn’t fighting all the time. Yama-chan really enjoyed eating the breakfasts, and Haruhime ate a lot of it too! I was glad that she was finally eating more than she needed!

Still, even though he was taking a break, his assignments were difficult as always. Mostly because he made them that way, but in the end they were just challenges that needed to be overcome. If the situation’s bad, make it better, or don’t be involved in it Cranel! Sensei would say that. Though, Cranel would be replaced with brat, and there would be four “idiot’s” and three “y’know’s” mixed in. Talking to him got a lot easier when I started ignoring those two phrases, really!

What was I thinking about again?

Oh, right.

Rakia.

It was an army led by the Kami of War, Ares-sama. For centuries, Rakia has been known to start fights all across the world to make sure that no kingdom grew too powerful! They once even fought with the Elves and the Spirits, but that ended in disaster. Still, they were a strong force of people blessed by the gods that could defeat any mortal army that didn’t have many mages. Ten thousand Adventurers tested in combat, hundreds of officers that were Level 3s, generals at Level 4, and a High Commander at Level 5. They knew I was coming. I was outnumbered. They intended to kill me while I didn’t want to kill any of them.

Grandfather, is it really alright for me to think this is a challenge instead of an impossible task?

…

“Oh, Cranel! How are you doing?!” Crozzo-san was one of the nicest and most honorable people I knew. There was a reason why Sensei trusted him enough to pass along all the ideas he had. The moment I mentioned I needed weapons and armor to bring Sensei back, Crozzo-san was the first onboard. I owed him and Leona-sama hundreds of millions of Valis for the Magic Resistance equipment they outfitted us all with, even if they both insisted that they didn’t need to be paid back. “How’s vanquishing my old Familia coming along?”

“Eh, you used to be part of Rakia, Crozzo-san?” It didn’t take me long to think through my surprise. Was it bad my first idea was to try and ask him if there was anyone in Rakia who trusted him? Yes. I am sure it is. Bad Bell! No taking advantage of other people’s relationships! Grandfather always told you never to interfere with the relations of two people without good reason unless the weaker party is miserable! His advice hasn’t gotten you in trouble yet! “You’re alright with me fighting them!?”

“Did you seriously forget that they tried to kidnap me!?” Oh, yeah, that happened. I’d been more focused on Collbrande. If there’s a Level 4 on the warpath, Crozzo-san, you can’t really focus on anything besides your own survival. I didn’t know that she was nice then! Nor did I have any reason to! She threw soldiers out of Babel from the thirtieth floor! “I might just be a blacksmith, but I’ve got problems to deal with too, y’know!?”

“Ah, sorry, Crozzo-san. I really forgot, though!” Yes, indeed. I forgot because I didn’t really think it was important. Am I lying right now? But I don’t like lying! Why am I lying so easily!? Sensei, this is all your fault! I will find a way to track mud on the carpet, I swear! A tug on my sleeve brings me out of my reverie. I remember who I’m here for. Right, this meeting was for Haruhime, not me. “Ah, ummm, do you have the clothes I ordered a few weeks ago. I know that you’re busy and all, but—.” I caught a bag that was speeding my way, nearly bumping into Haruhime who was hiding behind me. “Ah, is this it? How did you make it so quickly?”

“…Had a set close to her size that was half-finished.” Ah, Laulos-senpai. I held tighter onto the parcel. Haruhime’s grip on my back tightened. She blamed herself for my senpai’s death. Maybe that was true. She had made that terrible person a higher Level than she should have been, but she’d been told to do so by her Ishtar. In the end, Haruhime was a victim. I wished she could see herself the same way. Crozzo seemed to notice Haruhime a moment later. He looked away and I could tell he regretted his words, but he wasn’t about to take them back. “Sorry about that.” He bowed his head at me, but I knew the apology wasn’t for me. “That was rude of me, Haruhime-san.”

I expected Haruhime to run away. I knew that I could catch her again and I was prepared to do so. However, instead of running, I heard her take a breath and take a step away from me.

“It’s alright. She was your friend.” Again, Haruhime was taking blame she shouldn’t. I didn’t know how she was able to smile so sweetly while saying such things. It wasn’t right. Haruhime was taking on blame that she shouldn’t. Even though I didn’t want Crozzo to regret his words, I didn’t want it to be because of Haruhime allowing him to say them. What was the right thing to do here? “I should have been stronger against Ishtar-s-san.”

“Ah, geez.” Surprisingly, Crozzo didn’t just nod and go along with Haruhime’s words. The red-haired blacksmith was quiet for a moment. I owed him a lot. It would’ve been impossible to bring Sensei back without him. Still, I wanted to tell him that his words were cruel and that they weren’t right. He was my friend, but Haruhime was someone who needed help. “Now why do you have to make me feel bad by saying things like that? I already apologized.” I blinked at the words. Haruhime seemed as surprised as me. I was sure that both of us were staring at Crozzo as he scratched his cheek and looked away. “I know all about having Skills that people want to use for their own benefit, Haruhime-san. If Ares had a way to keep me in Rakia, he would’ve used it. I was just lucky that wasn’t the case.”

…Again, it seems like I’ve forgotten something important.

Crozzo Blood.

Crozzo was the only Blacksmith in the whole world capable of making the most powerful Magical Swords.

Just like Haruhime was the only person who could grant another person a Level Up.

Crozzo, more than anyone, could understand Haruhime’s position, because it could’ve been his own.

“Just like Ares would’ve had me make Magic Swords for Rakia, Ishtar had you make her weapons stronger. You… you’re just someone who was used by your god. Just like how I would’ve been by mine.” Crozzo gave a few nods, but I could see how difficult it was for him to talk about his situation. Despite his earnest words, he knew that he was far better off than Haruhime. His situation could’ve been, but Haruhime’s had already happened. He struggled to find the right words, but he managed to raise his head and match Haruhime’s gaze. “If you feel bad about what you did, then make up for it, get stronger, and don’t let it happen again. I tried to ignore my past once... it didn’t work out.”

I’d like to say that Haruhime found some strength in Crozzo’s words. I would’ve been happy if Haruhime was able to reply and agree with what Crozzo said. However, in the end, she remained silent. Even before someone who could connect with her, who could understand what she went through, Haruhime was unable to say or do anything.

I wanted to do something, anything, but I couldn’t find the right words to say. The words just wouldn’t appear. None of Sensei’s or Grandfather’s words came to mind. No, that was wrong. Sensei would say that Haruhime needed to stand up for herself. Grandfather would have me comfort her and tell her everything was going to be okay. One had her standing alone and afraid. The other had her relying on me rather than herself.

In the end, I had to rely on Sensei’s wisdom.

Sometimes it was better to say nothing, be patient, and wait.

I will find a way to make her happy, but it wasn’t going to be today.

…

“It looks ferocious.” Haruhime looked at the uniform Crozzo modified. I agreed. While everyone else’s clothes, even Sensei’s, had become sleeker and smoother, Laulos-senpai’s last order reminded me of Sensei’s uniform when we first met. All the current uniforms could fit easily in a ballroom without the coat, mask, and hat. Laulos-senpai’s had armored gauntlets and greaves, a helmet, and a cuirass. The coat was short and obviously only meant for hiding weapons and elixirs within its folds. Without a doubt, it fit Laulos-senpai’s style of ruthless fighting. “Will I ever be able to wear it?”

“You will. I’m sure of it.”

I tried to sound optimistic. However, between my assignment from Sensei and training Haruhime in the Dungeon, I felt as though I was being buried beneath my newfound responsibilities. However, as Sensei said, I needed to grow as a leader as my Familia had grown immensely. If I wanted to protect the people close to me, I couldn’t just be a warrior throwing myself into combat. I needed to be like Sensei, who always knew the right order to give and the right place to be, and so I needed to change. The first step to being like Sensei would be the same step he took years ago: helping someone else.

I packed up Laulos’s armor and put it away in Haruhime’s room. I had her go over her tools, weapons, and journal. She looked meek, unable to fight, and without any drive. Haruhime looked defeated, as though she was tossed aside and left to be forgotten, just like I’d been after my Grandfather died and I’d reached Orario. She needed help, just like I did so many months ago, so I would help her as much as I could.

“Let’s go, Haruhime. We’ll make an Adventurer out of you yet!”

Though Sensei never said it, I knew that he believed that the best way to help yourself was to help another person.

“H-hai, S-sensei.”

…

Without a Doubt, Work Never Ceases. (22.4)

…

Boredom is the problem of people without problems. Of all the “problems” that the rich and wealthy tout, boredom is by far the worst of them all. Basically, saying you’re bored means you’re tired of all the entertainment you have available and have no need to work. There’s no need for you to work or to get into shape, and you require further stimulation that you will readily purchase with your available funds. In short, those who are bored have such great lives that they’re asking for the aforementioned life to be less great. Declaring that you’re bored is the ultimate expression of wealth and disregard for other humans. My wage-slave parents are never bored because they’re wage slaves! I was never bored because I was always either a) studying, b) entertaining myself, or c) trying to entertain myself instead of studying. Now, I’m not bored because I’ve got too many things trying to kill me all the time!

Even normal people, who can all go blow up for all I care, don’t go around saying they’re bored! They do meaningful things with their time (lol) like making friends (lol) or hanging out with their cliques (lol). Sure they’re wasting their time with friendships and relationships doomed to fail after leaving High School, but they’re still practicing how to be smarmy and give lip service to their future bosses. In the end, despite their low ranking in the pyramid of decency to fellow humans (where I am at the tippy top due to my candor), normies still rank higher than those who declare themselves bored!

Go do something useful with your damned lives! Learn a skill! Give me money! Time is money! Money is something you can give to me! If you’re really looking for something to do, go get a job and give me the money you make! What do you mean you want to keep the money? Why would you do that? That’ll just make your boredom worse! Trust me on this. The best thing you can do for yourself is to do doing what’s best for me.

In summary, if you have time to be bored, then you have time to make money.

My apologies, my progenitors shackled by corporate chains (paychecks), but your son is most definitely not going to beat the system and escape the Japanese culture of overwork.

Your son shall be shackling others to it and be the source of the problem itself in a whole new world at this rate!

…

It started with my decision to look into the offices. All I’d wanted to do was to check (raid) the finances of the corporation which I had created during my few months of insanity. Fels was a pretty busy guy, especially since he was now currently explaining to a group of gods that there was something incredibly dangerous happening within the Dungeon. I was sure that he wouldn’t mind me helping out and taking my hefty contractor’s fee. All in all, I was being a good Samaritan and helping someone out before they knew they needed help for a low, low price.

Unfortunately, due to my kind nature, I found myself doing far more than someone on vacation should. Before I knew it, I’d spent the whole afternoon checking books and filing reports in Fel’s office! I’m too good of a person, dammit! Or, maybe, I was more Japanese than I expected myself to be. Damn you, wage-slave ancestors, you’ve made me look for work while I’m on vacation!

Anyway, I soon found out that there was a countermeasure against me going back to my business. As I should’ve expected of my students, they didn’t leave anything to chance. Before the sun set, I found myself being dragged out by the collar onto the street by Tiona Hiryute who was far, far too cheerful about the whole matter.

“Oi, Hiryute.” I did my best to ignore the many onlookers of the scene. Some of them were my employees. However, they probably didn’t know that. Not even my “secretary” recognized me without my coat, hat, and weapons. Stealth Hikki had evolved during my period of madness. Its new form was far more powerful. Unless I was dressed in a particular way, no one recognized me at all. Basically, my clothes got popular before I did. I think I might cry. “Where are we going?”

“We’re going to have dinner together! My treat!” Hiryute’s cheer was entirely unbefitting of the situation. Not that my Amazon captor was ever not cheerful. Tiona Hiryute was simply the sort of person who always had a smile on her face and a laugh ready to be let loose. She was, in essence, a Genki girl to the core… one who had money and was offering free food. My greatest weaknesses combined with a personality I couldn’t refute. Why do I sound like a call girl? “I’ll be taking you to my favorite place in Orario!”

I recognized the street we were on and realized where we were headed.

“…we’re going to the Hostess of Fertility, aren’t we?” The one place I’d done my best to avoid besides the Dungeon. Within its walls was a singular person who I still didn’t know what to do about. I considered my chances of escaping. They were well into the negatives unless I did something drastic like cut off my hand. I could regrow it, so losing a hand wasn’t an issue, but the cost of leaving my severed hand in Hiryute’s was too high. I was sure that I wouldn’t survive the ensuing situation. I settled on mockery. Low chance of success but no risk. The best choice. “Why is your favorite place in Orario the Hostess of Fertility exactly?”

“Because it’s the place where I see you the most, Hat-kun!” Hrrgk. What. That was way too sweet! Don’t look at me with that grin! I can see that blush! You’re not even trying to hide it, dammit! Also, I’m the guy in this relationship, right!? Why is it I’m the one being paid for? I’m not complaining, you should totally pay for my food, but I just really need to point out that I’m a guy! I am a man. A manly man. I kill monsters. “Why won’t it be my favorite place to spend time at? It’s where you usually are!”

“…Ok.” I was unable to manage an answer, especially as Hiryute lifted me to my feet, grasped my arm, and looked at me with a beaming smile. The doors of the Hostess of Fertility emitted a discernable killing intent. Crossing the threshold into the inn was the same as stepping into hell itself. The Dungeon? Don’t make me laugh. What I was about to walk into was more than enough to damage my soul forever and justify my future self-looking back at this moment and warning about walking into Hell. Unfortunately, I was sure I wasn’t getting a Reality Marble for this. “But, can’t we go somewhere else? I mean, I kinda want to go…” Not here. “To some other restaurant?”

“Neh, Hat-kun, if you run away from Gale-chan forever, you’re going to regret it!” Stop with the armor-piercing statements! I’m a half-NEET, half-Otaku! That attack is too effective against me! How do you expect to capture me if you’re doing 300% damage to me with your attacks!? I’m just going to end up fainting each time you encounter me! I’m a pretty rare dude, y’know? You can’t rely on luck forever. Also, since I wasn’t wearing my armor, I’m pretty sure that I’m a shiny type right now! Hiryute gave a laugh, smiled, and made sure I couldn’t run by holding my arm even tighter. There was no escape here. None at all. Still, just before I was about to open the door, the Amazon whispered. “I’ll take you somewhere else next time, Hat-kun.” Was… was that a wink? Since when did Hiryute get so sly… “Today though, I’m too excited to spend time with you alone. I don’t know if I’ll be able to restrain myself…”

N-nani? What was that last sentence right there? That really quiet sentence that couldn’t have been heard by my normal ears? Dammit. You have to face the truth Hikigaya! No! That was a lewd statement right there! That’s a lie and you goddamn know it, fool! Hiryute is off-limits, she’s pure, and there’s no way she would say such things! She’s an Amazon. All of those words don’t apply to her. How dare you lust after your Imouto! You’re a deviant pervert to the highest degree! Hiryute Tiona isn’t Hikigaya Komachi, idiot!

The sudden storm of thoughts made me slightly woozy. Some of it didn’t even make sense. Both sides of the argument barely held any reason. I swayed in place a bit. After a week of low-stress and low-workload, the sudden storm of issues and voices almost managed to make me nauseous. If Hiryute wasn’t holding onto me, I was sure that I would’ve had to lean against the doorpost.

“Eh? Hikigaya-kun are you okay?” Hiryute was more perceptive than I’d ever given her credit for. The Amazon took me to the bench where I’d sat by Wallenstein months ago. Jeez. Things were changing too damn quickly. I suppose I was only getting what I’d asked for. Progress came with more issues than I’d liked or was prepared for. Then again, how many people thought they’d ever have to deal with their own thoughts fighting one another? “If you’re sick I’ll take you to the Dian Cecht right away!”

“Yeah, I’m fine. I just…” Excuses were aplenty. There were dozens of things I could say. Jokes I could crack. Comments that I could make. Without a doubt, I could just push away the issue. However, in reality, I couldn’t. I said I’d give them a chance. That I wouldn’t cut them off. Hiryute Tiona wasn’t my enemy. I didn’t need to work against her by treating her like some demented seductress. I let myself take a breath and actually let myself feel my fatigue. Gripping at my knees, I did my best to marshal my thoughts into cohesion. It wasn’t painful, but it was a challenge of endurance every time. It was a good thing I made sure to put away the Amulet instead of carrying it around. The temptation to wear it and reset, even at the cost of 6 hours, was too much. “…I need a moment. I can’t take in things too quickly. I get too many thoughts that I need to deal with.”

I didn’t get an answer, but we sat together for a while. Pulling out my watch, I did everything I could to clear my thoughts or at least put them in holding cells. The constant ticking of the clock gave me the anxiety I needed to power through the other worries. Essentially, I was fighting fire with fire. However, I’d rather handle a little stress about getting home and sleeping on time than let the little niggling issues become full blown disorders. A harsh secretary in the back of my head was better than two demented and crazed psychos.

“… you were making yourself busy by working weren’t you.” Hiryute fretted while I managed to get a semblance of control over my thoughts and try to actually think. The short-haired Amazon crossed her arms and looked away. “I’m sorry, Hikigaya—”

“Don’t apologize for mistakes you didn’t make, Hiryute.” I compartmentalized the issues soon enough. One step at a time. No worrying about the future. In the end, the root of the issue was something I’d already acknowledged. Some part of me still couldn’t accept the promise I’d made. I doubted that part of me would ever disappear. However, that was my problem to deal with, not Hiryute’s. I forced myself to my feet. “C’mon, let’s go. I can do this… as long as we take things slow.”

“…” Hiryute didn’t respond for a few moments, but soon enough I felt her fingers interlace between mine. The Amazon was smiling when our gazes met. Well. Couldn’t you have done this earlier? What’s the point of me compartmentalizing all my thoughts if you just wiped them all away in an instant? “Thanks for meeting me halfway, Hachiman.”

Seriously, what kind of a weakness is cute girls being cute?

…