"Medical glue? Seriously?" I looked at Ash's wrapped leg while crowded into the hospital room with Karen and Melissa.

"They couldn't find anything to really pierce skin and do it neatly. Unlike projectile steel, which does cut skin, but thankfully didn't hit anything major. Also, I'm going to go on record and say pain pills are way suckier than an IV drip. They take forever to kick in." Ash laid back. "They figure I'm probably going to be wheelchair bound for a week or two, then crutches. Depends on how well I heal up. But since they sealed it pretty close to evenly it shouldn't be bad."

"I should have thrown everything that first hit. Then Barry wouldn't have had a chance to escalate." I lambasted myself.

Melissa spoke up quietly. "Speaking of Barry, what happened? I figured you'd be no more than twenty minutes behind us, not four hours. Did you have to wait for someone to come deal with him?"

I blinked away the memory of fire. "I…had a mini breakdown, I think. Once we got you guys going, I just kinda stopped for a few hours or so?" At least my cycling had continued while I was blanking out. "Weirdly, Barry was still there waiting once I started focusing again. Apparently, I did something that made my energy feel 'not alien tainted' whatever that means. He wanted me to do it again, probably show him how." I paused, thinking back to his weird comment. "Offered to try to kill me again to force it? But politely. Then he just left. I didn't try to stop him because I needed to come check on you guys."

"He's insane." Karen frankly stated.

"Nicole." Ash said seriously and I looked at him. "Next time you end up in a throw down with Barry, don't try to break an arm. Break his face. And I mean that literally. And that's if one of us doesn't don't get to him first, because I'm not going to hide next time if I have a weapon."

"But he was finally willing to start talking about the whole 'they think we're alien tainted' though, and they still have techniques we could learn from them!" I protested, but my heart really wasn't completely in it.

"I think..." Melissa started. "You're putting too much effort into trying to collect every bit of information about cultivation."

"What?"

"Most mornings you're up before I am and I find you cycling on the back porch or the roof, which I usually join you at. After that you tool around on the forums, collecting whatever random bits people are posting and putting them onto the wiki. I've seen some of the research lists you've been making from that too. Things to look into, things to give to Brent to have looked into. I've helped you poke around with the handful of plants with energy that have been brought on base."

I nodded, that sounded right.

"Then you either head to the training area in Leonard Wood and spend a good chunk of the day there. Helping out soldiers however you can. Or more recently, run here to Rolla and hold freeform classes for anyone available to look into things. Either way, you're right there with them, trying to learn and teach at the same time." Melissa continued. "Then we have Combatives. And while after today I'm glad we've been going; it still revolves around cultivating. Afterwards, I can usually catch you on the couch looking into anything else Brent, Danny, or anyone else in the Seekers has dropped into the system over the course of the day. Late evening, you'll end with another hour or so of cycling and playing with Feathersteps by parkouring over the house and backyard."

"OK?" I wasn't sure where Melissa was going with this. "I've changed up my schedule plenty, depending on what's going on that day."

"Yeah, testing geodes. Group meetings about the Seekers and how we're doing over all. Working with specific tests like the fourth breakthrough testing. I understand that beating the alien is important, I really do. More than this being a nine to five job. We're turning this cultivating into a lifestyle, because god damn giant spiders and who knows what's next. But you're making it into an obsession to know every little thing about this. Take a step back for a moment."

"I don't think I'm obsessing." I argued. "We need all the information we can get, we don't know what's going to be important. And if we put that information out there, others can build on it and we all get better that way."

"A few techniques we don't know and a crazy man's words that you didn't do something 'alien tainted' in a fight with him." Ash interrupted. "That juice is not worth the squeeze. I've been thinking about it, not much else to do in here besides watch TV and wait for the Percocet to kick in. I've got a few ideas about it, if you want to hear?"

I sighed. "Sure, go ahead."

"Option one is he's telling the truth. Whatever you did to the car did make your energy feel different to him. I didn't notice any difference, but I could be wrong. Karen, Melissa? You notice anything different about Nicole's energy when she did that?"

"Other than a whole lot of it, no." Karen answered.

Melissa thought for a second. "About the same as what you did to that McInnis guy, but it didn't feel different to me."

Ash nodded to them. "Maybe Barry's a lot more sensitive and noticed something we didn't and that's what he was talking about. However, that leads into Option two. Even if you did something different with your energy, you're putting a lot of stock into the words of a guy that has had no compunctions about trying to kill you. How do you know he's not wrong or wants to screw you over in general?"

"But-"

"Which leads me to Option three. He was lying out his ass because you were beating his ass. He changed his tune pretty damn quick after you cratered him into a tree after all, so it's entirely possible he said whatever he could to not have you finish him off." Ash stared at me for a moment, before shifting with a wince to adjust his leg.

"He was still there hours after when he could have walked away when I was out, and still demanded to know what I'd done." I blew out my breath. "But, you might be right. They still have techniques we don't though. You're right that I cratered him into a tree, and holy shit over that, but he got up. That Earth defense technique, if we can get anywhere near as strong as the alien and just ignore hits from him? That juice is worth it."

"Again, you're obsessing over knowing everything right now." Melissa interjected. "Barry's known that technique for at best a few months. Get someone in the Seekers to reinvent that wheel. We probably have someone already cycling Earth energy that can try."

"Two." I muttered.

"Exactly." Melissa smiled at me. "And if they can't, we haven't really asked Brent for anything crazy. Ask him to find however many people in the military cycling Earth to try. You have resources that don't have to be crazy terrorists who want to kill you and us."

"I might even have a good starter idea for the Metal energy dagger tip thing." Ash noted. "But not until I'm at least out of the hospital, alright? They'll get mad at me for starting fires in here."

Arms went around me as Karen enveloped me in a hug. "Let's go get some crappy hospital food, talk about stupid shit for a while, then you get some sleep." I felt a tightness in my chest start to turn loose.

~~~

June 9th​

First thing the next morning I stood in front of Sergeant First Class Collins, my and several other peoples Combatives trainer. "I'd like to add staff work to my Combatives training."

The salt and peppered older man laughed for a moment before looking at the serious face I was giving him. "Staff? I guess that's better than the idiots always coming in with pawn shop swords and asking to add it. But any staff I put in your hands you're going to snap in a few strikes. Hell, you're more deadly bare handed just by the strength you can put behind a punch." He leaned back in his desk chair. "Normal extensions to Combatives are combat knives as a secondary weapon. I can at least get some good knives you might have to work at to crumple."

I shook my head. "I'll carry a steel pole if needed, but I need something with more reach than a knife. We had to squash dog-sized spiders with car doors because we didn't have anything else. A staff I could hit them around with. Or if it's strong enough, I could pierce them with it. And it'd give me more options against someone else."

I paused. Could we figure out Barry's Metal energy trick? Would it make a metal staff harder? Surely there would be a Wood version I could use for a normal staff too.

"But yeah. I need something a little more like a weapon than just basic Combatives." I finished.

"Dog sized. You're not talking little dogs either, are you?" Collins sighed as I shook my head and measured out their size. "What the actual hell is going on."

"There's a spot in Mark Twain that you can walk into and be somewhere else. It was untouched woods that had huge spiders and maybe other stuff too." I sighed and looked around the office for a moment. "You know, there's a decent chance we'll find an entrance to little places like that closer to here too, since all we know is they're wooded. So it's probably best for everyone to be prepared."

He gave me a gimlet eye. "MPs are the only ones authorized to carry firearms on base. You want that changed, I am most definitely not the one to be talking to Nicole. Your boss has a hell of a lot more weight in those sorts of conversations."

"Danny?" I startled.

"No." Collins stood. "Look, I'll see about getting some staves, I can get you started but I don't normally teach on that subject. I'll even see if we can find someone that can teach you more. Up to you to not break things though. Just give me day or two."

"Thanks." I smiled thinly. "But I make no guarantees about not breaking things."

"Ms. Firen?" Collins narrowed his eyes.

I sighed. "I'm going to end up breaking things figuring out how hard I can actually hit, and when I need to. I tried to break someone's elbow with an open hand strike and he shrugged it off. And the strike was strong enough to break you. So no, I'm not deadly enough bare handed if it comes down to it."

"No one's going to want to spar with you if you're threatening something like that." Collins noted, now completely serious. "And I won't allow you to permanently injure anyone here either."

"I can still hold back in spars, Sergeant Collins. I just need to figure out what not holding back is like as well."

I left without another word.

~~~

Sitting on a roof staring out over the edge of the woods was a nice way to let my mind wander. The early afternoon sun was warm on my skin while the occasional breeze rippled the trees.

From the edge of housing here on base, I could look out over a few miles or so of woods before everything blurred together. Was there another spot to walk through in those woods? There wasn't anything obvious to delineate it. No fault lines to demarcate it. No huge storm to suggest not sailing or flying into it.

Just, pockets of woods that were different. Massive bugs that had breakthroughs. Probably assholes messing with my head.

I swung my hand, letting my new collapsible baton snap out. Just over two feet and if I tried to stab a spider it'd probably just collapse back together. But for the moment, better than nothing. I cycled a little extra energy, pushing it towards the baton, but it didn't magically shift to metal or do anything special. The energy clung for just a moment before fading away into the background.

I cycled a bit more energy and pushed it out again, trying to shove it like I had yesterday. But whatever out of my mind twist I'd done, it wasn't that easily repeatable. Push, pull, twist, turn.

I smiled to myself, thinking what it must look like to someone able to sense energy and watching. Here I was cycling enough energy outwards to match someone in three breakthroughs going all out, and all the energy was doing was weird movements and collapsing on itself as I even tried tying it into a knot a few times. And it was only a small effort for me.

Whacking the energy with more barely clinging onto the baton energy didn't do anything either, though it was both fun and interesting to watch it break apart that way too.

I'd been playing with my energy for over an hour when a ringtone went off in my pocket. I pulled out the earpiece and shrugged, putting it in and tapping to answer. "Hello?"

"Hey honey, how are you?" Dad's voice asked.

"Hey. Alright, I guess. Tomorrow's the normal time I call you. What's up?" I replied back.

"Karen called. Why didn't you call me to let me know you'd been in another fight?"

I nearly slipped off the roof. Damn it, Karen. "I wasn't really hurt, just a little heat burned. Ash actually got hurt a lot more, he's the one in the hospital right now."

"Uh huh. Pull the other one, it's got bells on. You got in another fight and your friend Ash ended up hurt because of the other person in the fight?"

"Yeah." I slumped a bit. "It was like ten seconds worth of a fight. It shouldn't have happened like that."

"Nicole, Karen didn't go into all the details of it, but she did say you didn't start it. So you can't hold yourself responsible for fights you don't start. Your own actions in the fight yes, but not for anyone else's. Now, while I hope your friend in the hospital is OK, I want to know how you're really feeling."

A flash of fire then throwing it backwards before I realized the flames didn't burn. Barry demanding to know what I'd done instead of keeping the fight going, and wanting to go through him to make sure the others were OK.

Where to start.

"I got kinda thrown at an electric car battery fire." I heard a gasp. Oh, Mom was listening in too. "It...didn't hurt like I thought it would, and I managed to knock the entire car away somehow. But Ash ended up getting car shrapnel in his leg because it somewhat exploded. So Ash getting hurt kinda is my fault. The fight ended pretty quick after that. So, feeling kinda sucky?"

I looked at the baton and swung it out again, letting it extend. "I am trying to get to a point that it won't happen again though."

"Nicole, unless you threw a car at your friend, it's not your fault." Mom's voice.

"Well, not at him. But over all of them because they'd been using it as a shield."

"Still not your fault." Mom insisted. "Where are you at right now?" She then asked.

"Sitting on my roof? I'm trying to figure out how to do something." I responded with confusion.

"No, you're sitting there moping. Go mope around someone else, you're always in a better mood with other people. Even if you still do whatever you're trying to do now, you need a friend. I'd say go find that boyfriend of yours, but he's still on activated reservist duty, right?"

Mike? I hadn't heard from him in almost a month come to think of it, maybe I really had been a little obsessively focusing. "Yeah, I'll go find someone to talk to. Or at least hang around."

"And call us when something happens. I don't like your friends calling instead to let us know, and you probably wouldn't have said anything when you called tomorrow." Dad spoke up. "I am glad you ended the fight quickly before you got hurt."

He was probably right about not telling them, though I wasn't sure if I'd ended that fight or it just stopped. "Alright. I'll go bug someone. And I'll send you a selfie to show you I'm not hurt."

"Thank you, sweetie." Mom sounded a bit relieved.

"Love you guys."

"Don't leave your head in the clouds, Nicole." Dad responded. "And we love you too."

"Dad." I couldn't help but laugh as he hung up.

Who to go bother though? Ash was still in the hospital, Karen probably hanging out there too. I could call Melissa.

That'd work for a start. I collapsed the baton and stuck it through its belt loop holder, hopping down from the roof. I'd need to call to find out if she was available though, and if I was going to need to head to Rolla again since she hadn't been at the house today.

I tapped my earpiece a few times, listening to it scroll through contacts before dialing.