《Love You In My Mind // Sirius Black》Chapter 57

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"That's all for today. We'll meet again in one week. Goodbye," Dumbledore ended today's meeting.

I'd been bobbing up and down excitedly throughout his whole speech, impatiently waiting to tell Marlene about my latest achievement.

As soon as everybody started to get up and leave the house, I turned to my best friend.

"Marls! I did it! I cast a Patronus!"

Her face immediately lit up, and from the corner of my eyes, I saw the marauders, Lily, Alice, Frank and Dorcas come closer to us, too.

"I knew you could do it!" Marlene whisper shouted to not scream through the whole house. "Amazing! Oh my merlin, I feel like such a proud mum right now!"

She giggled and squeezed me into an embrace.

"Great, Freya!" Remus congratulated as well, patting my shoulder twice. "We all knew you could do it!"

"Took me long enough," I chuckled and freed myself from Marlene's bear-hug.

She immediately ruffled my hair, grinning crazily.

"Good things take time," Lily smiled. "How did you do it?"

"Sirius helped me," I smiled at him, hoping that he could read in my expression how grateful I was that he'd helped me.

He smiled. "Of course."

"I've got to go," Peter suddenly exclaimed, making us all turn to him, confused.

"What?" James asked. "Why so suddenly? Are you alright?"

But Peter didn't listen or just ignored the question, as he was already making his way to the hallway without looking back.

"Bye!" I shouted after him, but again, he didn't react.

"Weird," Doracs said what we all were thinking.

"Maybe someone should go after him?" Sirius suggested unsurely.

"I think he wants to be alone right now," Remus replied quietly, still looking at the door where Peter had left.

"Soo," Marlene boxed my shoulder. "Back to the highlight of the evening." She wiggled her eyebrows. "What's its shape?"

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"An owl," I replied proudly, forgetting the confusion about Peter's sudden departure.

"Ooh, that's so you! Amazing!"

"I actually thought of something similar," Remus smiled. "And I don't want to blow my own trumpet, but I was actually pretty close with all of my guesses."

James snorted and shoved him aside playfully. "Oh, please. Get out of yourself!"

Remus chuckled again and ducked when James moved to shove him again. He stopped on my other side.

"Congrats again, Freya. Now," He checked his watch. "I've got an appointment now, so I'll head out, too. Bye everyone."

And he did just that, followed by a chorus of 'byes'.

"Wait, how late is it actually?" Lily asked James, who checked his watch. "Almost nine. Wh- Ooh! Your parents!"

"Right, we've got to go, too," Lily excused them before we all said our Goodbyes.

"Now, Frey," Marlene turned to me again. "Have you also tried to communicate through your Patronus yet?"

I nodded. "Yes, that was the easiest part."

"She managed it immediately," Sirius confirmed.

"Cool, cool." Marlene nodded contently. "This day was a success, then. We figured out everything about the Dark Marks and Freya managed her Patronus. We're smashing it."

She wrapped an arm around Dorcas, and one around me. "We can all go home happily, now."

"I think I'll check on Peter first," I thought out loud.

"Good idea," Alice said. "Maybe he's ready to talk now. It's important for him to know that we care."

It sure was.

"So, that's it?" Sirius asked. Everyone nodded.

After I hugged Sirius and Marlene again, we all went different ways.

I apparated to Peter's place. The light was on, so I knew he was at home. I didn't hesitate, made my way to the little house and rang the doorbell.

I heard steps and Peter opened the door a tiny bit. He'd already changed out of his street clothes and was wearing a blue sweater and comfortable looking trousers.

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His eyes widened when he recognised me, but he opened the door a little further nevertheless. "You're... Here?"

"Hey," I said. "Why did you leave so suddenly? Everything alright?"

"Yes," He hurried to say. "Everything is fine. I just wanted to go home... that's all."

Somehow, I didn't believe that, altough I couldn't say why. "You know you can always talk to me, right? To everyone, actually. We're all here for you, and we all care about you."

Peter nodded, giving me a small smile. His voice almost broke. "I know."

"Then what is bothering you?"

Peter stared at me for a second, pupils wide, breathing rapidly. After a few seconds, he opened his mouth, his gaze not leaving my eyes. "I..." He swallowed and continued to whisper almost inaudibly. "Lo.."

Before he even finished his sentence, he cut himself off, closed his mouth again, squeezed his eyes shut and sighed. "It's nothing." He smiled and looked at me again. "Thanks for caring. It really means a lot and I appreciate it, I really do. I know that I can always count on all of you. I'm fine, really."

I had a hard time believing him, but I'd already pressured him enough. I knew how it felt when you didn't want to answer to questions. He'd talk if he needed it.

"Promise?"

He nodded. "Promise."

I nodded. "Okay then. I'll see you the day after tomorrow, right?" We'd decided to try one of Peter's Grandma's recipes together.

He nodded. "Of course. Until then."

"Bye." I waved and turned around to walk out of the garden again, so that I could disapparate home.

When I looked back, the front door was already closed again - but though the little patches of frosted glass, I could see that he was still standing behind the door.

I took a deep breath, concentrated and disapparated.

Once I opened my eyes again, everything inside me turned cold in shock.

I stood there, unable to move, my heart almost bursting out of my ribcage in fear.

I blinked in the hopes that I'd imagined it, but it was still there.

The Dark Mark was throwing a soft green light on our house.

The front door was open.

Once I processed it, I ignored all of my fears, grabbed my wand and ran into the hallway.

Horrible images were in my mind, Francisca or Mum lying there, motionless.

But I stopped dead in my tracks when I reached the living room.

I dropped my outstretched arm and just watched the scene in front of me.

The swirl of emotions stopped when a numb feeling overcame me.

The shocking truth was that I didn't immediately burst into tears when I saw the lifeless body of my father lying in front of the couch.

The TV was still on, commenting on the scene with the laughter of a sitcom that was playing in the background.

I didn't know how to feel, but a lonely tear still ran over my cheek. None followed.

I was relieved because it wasn't my mum or Francisca. Only then did I remember that they were both still at work.

I felt confused because I wasn't super sad.

A little upset, maybe. But not because my father was gone.

As horrible as it made me feel, I didn't mourn him as much as I should have.

I was more sad because I'd lost the person he could have been.

And once I'd processed everything, all I could think about was what I had to do now.

I didn't proof read because I'll go visit my grandma now (we can't be late) and have no wifi there, but I wanted to drop this off now.

I'll edit the mistakes I find later.

Thanks for reading and thanks for getting me to 10K!

Stay happy!

Xoxo, your fangirl

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