Despite Sirius' insistence, we weren't allowed to enter the consulting room, and had to take a seat on the chairs in the hallway.

I couldn't take my eyes off Sirius, who had his hands buried in his curls, and his arms propped up on his legs.

The hallow feeling in my stomach just wouldn't disappear as I watched him sway back and forth nervously, and I was still in shock from the recent events.

After contemplating for about five minutes, I finally opened my mouth.

"I'm sorry."

My voice was quiet, but Sirius still heard me. He dropped his hands and lifted his head to look at me. "What for?"

The intensity of his Grey eyes caught me slightly off guard. He hadn't looked at me ever since I'd brought back a wounded Marlene, so I had thought that he'd blamed me and hadn't expected him to look me in the eyes again, but here we were.

His hair was messy, his face pale and his eyes red, but he still looked beautiful to me. I needed a few seconds to sort my thoughts again, and then the guilty feeling returned.

"I should've distracted the Death Eaters better. If I'd done a better job, none of this would have happened. It's my fault they even noticed us in the first place. It's all my fault that Marlene got hurt. I'm sorry."

Sirius' expression didn't change. Then he lifted an eyebrow. "Did you send the curse that hurt Marls?"

The odd question made me furrow my eyebrows. He didn't sound angry or anything, just matter-of-factly, but it was still strange. "No?"

Sirius nodded briskly. "Then as far as I'm concerned, this is not your fault, Frey. Don't be so harsh on yourself. You tried your best and you saved Marls' and your life by causing a distraction to get away."

"Marlene got hurt," I objected.

"But didn't die," Sirius added and put a hand on my shoulder.

His words didn't do much to make me feel better. Because although Sirius tried to play it cool that Marlene had gotten hurt, I still saw how worried he truly was.

He was falling apart, just like how I'd fallen apart when I'd seen him join Remus on a full moon, without knowing if he was save.

Sirius' voice had quivered at the sheer thought of Marlene dying.

He dropped his hand off my shoulder and we fell silent again.

I didn't feel like saying anything.

But apparently, Sirius had to get something off his chest. He swallowed, looking straight ahead at the wall in front of us.

"When I saw you carry her in, all pale and bloody, it felt as if my heart had stopped beating. For a split second I actually thought that... You know... I can't bare that thought. I can't get that picture out of my head-"

His voice cracked.

He didn't look at me, but I still saw tears glisten in the corner of his eye.

My heart broke at the sight.

I mustered up all my strength. "Like you said, nothing happened. She'll be fine."

"I know that," Sirius turned to me. "But all of this makes this situation so much more real. We're all living in constant danger. Today I realised how bad all of this could actually turn out. What if something happens to all of you? What if something happens to Marlene? I love her more than anything on earth, I can't lose her!"

Ouch. The knife in my chest had just doubled in size and I almost flinched.

Pull yourself together, Freya! This isn't about you, it's about Sirius!

"I know what you mean," I croaked out of my clogged up throat. "But we can't really change anything about the danger. It's present whether we choose to fight or not, so we might as well do the latter. Faith is all we have."

Silence.

"And we're good at magic," I added after a second thought. "So that'll help us, too."

A short chuckle escaped from Sirius, and my heart fluttered. "At least something, right?" He smiled weakly, and I smiled back, putting on my brave face.

Anything to make him feel better.

"Yeah, we're all gonna get out of this just fine, I'm sure of it, don't worry," I said. "And Marlene and I are partners in our Auror training, we always help and challenge each other, so we get the best preparation there is. I promise you, Marlene and I will always have each other's backs on our missions, so nothing will happen to both of us.- Well, we'll probably get a few cuts and bruises, that's inevitable, but we won't die on each other's watch, I can assure you that."

I couldn't read Sirius' expression, but after a few seconds, the ghost of a smile appeared on his lips. "Now, that's put my mind at rest.... Kinda. I know you're all great witches and wizards, you're right. If we have each other's backs, nothing will ever happen to any of us."

I nodded, hoping that I was right.

"Thanks, Frey," Sirius muttered, pulling me into a brief hug and letting out a small sigh.

The lump in my throat hadn't subsided, but at least I'd made him feel better. That was all that mattered to me at the moment.

It made me feel better about getting us into this mess.

"Now," Sirius' voice got louder as he leant back. "How long do these Healers take!? I thought Moody healed her already? So all they really have to do is check that everything is alright with her, that shouldn't take long."

I shrugged. "Well, technically, Moody said Marlene was 'all patched up'. I don't know if his definition of that word is close to our's, considering how permanently wounded and scarred that man is."

Sirius snorted. "In that case, let's give the Healers all the time they need."

"We'd better," I agreed, chucking quietly.

I was just about to start some small talk to distract us, when an all too familiar voice on our right called my name. "Freya!? What are you doing here? Are you okay?"

Francisca was making her way towards us, with worried crinkles on her forehead.

I quickly stood up and gestured her to calm down. I'd completely forgotten that she worked here. I was just lucky that she'd found me here, and not Mum.

"I'm fine, no need to worry. I'm here for a friend."

Francisca's shoulders dropped in relief. "Oh, okay. What happened?"

I actually hadn't told Mum or my sister about the Order of the Phoenix, and I didn't plan to do that now. I didn't want them to worry.

"Oh, nothing big. I've hit her a little too hard today in our training, so we've come here to get her checked up."

"We?" Francisca repeated, before her eyes fell on Sirius, who hurried to stand up, too.

"Ah," she said, whereas Sirius held out his hand.

Francisca took it. "Nice to see you in person," Her eyes twinkled.

"You too," Sirius replied with a smile. He didn't even look confused after my lie, and just played along.

"Now," Francisca looked at her watch. "I'd love to chat with you for a little while longer, but I've got to go now. It's a busy day."

She pulled me into a brief hug. "I'll see you on Sunday, right?"

I nodded. "Bye."

With that, my sister was gone again, but the encounter was enough to put a mischievous glint in Sirius' eyes.

"She's even smaller than you."

He caught my fist and even had the audacity to laugh.

"Arse," I mumbled, trying to suppress my laughter. But before a small fight could break loose, the door behind us opened and Sirius spun around, dropping my hand.

He only had eyes for Marlene, who was slowly making her way out of the room, followed by the Healer who'd treated her.

Sirius jumped up and immediately supported Marlene's side. "And?"

The Healer adjusted his glasses. "I've healed the wound completely and Miss McKinnon will be fine in no time. But she's lost a lot of blood and since she might still be a little affected by the curse, she should definitely lie low for the rest of the week. But that's all."

"Great," Sirius nodded and shook the Healer's hand. "Thank you."

The wizard nodded and walked away to his next patient.

"Now," Sirius turned to Marlene again. "Let's get you home."

He just waved me a little goodbye before he headed for the door.

Marlene looked over her shoulder and shouted "Goodbye", before I lost sight of them in the crowd of people in the hospital.

Their departure was so sudden that I stood there for a few seconds, before I really understood what had happened.

They had left, so I disapparated home.

I've got an English exam tomorrow (my pre-a level exam) and I'm really nervous bc I don't want anything below an A. (that's me, the over achiever)

It sucks because there's a reading and a listing comprehension test, and I never get those right, although I actually understand everything - _-

And I haven't studied a single bit for the writing part about 'Brave new world' rip

I just hope that all of this won't ruin the a-streak I've got in English.

Nvm I've gotta sleep, I'm tired, bye

Stay happy!

Xoxo, your fangirl