I sluggishly hauled myself down the road with my mind in a complete jumble. The date was not supposed to be like this! Jace was meant to accept the bracelet and confess his love to me and then we ride off into the sunset. Don't you hate it when people change your plans like that?

Tears were streaming down my face, my nose was all runny and gross and just to make it even worse, it was raining. Only a little, but raining nonetheless.

The rain, slowly but surely, pattered down faster and soon, as if it wasn't expected already, it was bucketing down.

It was like the rain symbolised how I felt right now, how the emotions grew and the deserted area I was in symbolised my loneliness. I should've kept my confession to myself, this was our first ever actual date for Christ sakes, and I had to go and ruin it completely. I wasn't sure if all the other places we've been to together were dates because neither of us asked each other out as if it was a date. Sure, we may have kissed in some of them but really, to me, this was our first official date.

I walked and walked, continuing to take right turns so I end up back where I was and didn't get lost in this area. There were weird noises around me and I felt kind of scared for my life just being outside, in the dark. Somebody could be following me, hell, I even thought that I heard noises of footsteps because that's how much I was thinking about it.

It's like when you think there's a spider on you and you start feeling things in your body because you're actually believing there are creepy crawlies on you.

I sighed, Jace and I were having so much fun, we were enjoying the date then It's had to screw it up! I had to go and offer the bracelet. You know what? I blame this all on the bracelet. Forget my confession for a moment, you could tell that Jace was taken aback when I tried giving him the stupid thing.

I surge of energy coursed through me and I stopped momentarily and brought my wrist up to my face and glared at the evil thing. I ripped it off completely, breaking the tassels on it that keep it together and then I threw it on the ground and walked away, letting it get all dirty and wet in the puddle.

Who even cares for the darn thing? Not Jace, obviously.

His name brought more tears to my eyes, my vision blurred and for a second, I saw him, standing there in front of me with open arm and a big grin on his face but it was just my imagination, it was too good to be true. Jace was long gone, he shot off and I have no idea where he is. He could be getting attacked right now and I'd never know about it.

I turned around. The design on the bracelet twinkled in the light and I contemplated going back and getting it, but I thought the better of it and left it there. It could burn in hell for all I care. My feet felt heavy, my heart ached, my head hurt and I was cold and soggy stood in the rain. Tomorrow would be a joyful day, I'd have a killer flu coming along and I'd have to see Jace.

I plopped down on the ground and rested my back on the wall, taking out my phone and sending my mum a text and telling her to come and pick me up from outside the carnival entrance. I finally took in my surroundings and saw that I was on a lively high street that had terrible lighting. In front of me was a shop that sold pleasure toys and surrounding it were plenty of pubs with a bunch of people crowding it and smoking, laughing and drinking. I could tell I wasn't exactly in the right place right now. I knew I was supposed to get up and wait outside the carnival entrance just like I had told my mum but honestly, I just wanted to sit here.

My eyes started to feel drowsy and to be honest, the concrete seemed so comfortable right about now. As a matter of fact, It seemed too comfortable. I rested my back back against the wall and watched as people walked past me, giving me odd looks. They all went in some motionless blur, I was really only paying half of my attention on them.

For ages, I just sat and sat. It felt like hours, it probably was. I don't know, I were quite far from home and with the evening rush of traffic, I could only predict that it would take about an hour for my mum to reach me but there's also the issue that she never looks at her phone so It could probably add an extra hour.

As people went past me, I started to feel more and more out of It. My head hurt and my eyes were extremely heavy. I was barely able to keep myself awake. I shifted a little so I was a little more comfortable but it was difficult when I was sitting on concrete. I inhaled, exhaled and shut my eyes. It felt nice to block out the lights that flashed in my eyes that read 'PLEASURE' and 'SEX' and 'CHEEKY' and 'DRESS UP' and 'PLAY TIME'.

I focused on the pattering of the rain, it was starting to slow down. It was nice, I was finally able to avert my thoughts. Even though it only worked for a little while, the short amount of time I had to think about things other than Jace was something I haven't been able to have lately and it only made me able to relish in the feeling more.

But when there's a high, there's a downfall and the Jace infested thoughts bombarded my mind once more. All I could picture was that look of absolute horror when I confessed to him that I love him.

I loved Jace.

I loved him a lot.

I don't think I could ever get over such an incredible person. Do I want to get over him? I'm not sure. What if he changes his mind and gives us a chance? Even though he doesn't love me back, I would wait for him as long as it takes because when- if -I ever read 'I love you' from his lips, I'd be over the moon.

Time passed and still, no sign of my mum. Where was your mum when you needed her? She would understand my dilemma straight away, she's my mum of course. Nobody could ever compare to her, I feel glad knowing that I couldn't have asked for anybody better.

My spinning head was starting to calm down, my thought process however, still hadn't changed. God, is this what heartbreak feels like? It's terrible. My entire mood just dropped and I think it's going to take a while before I can be happy again or even crack a genuine smile.

I tried to stand up but I fell back into my place because my legs just stopped working. So instead, I was left limp and frail on the concrete in the rain. My mind was screaming at me to get a jog on and try real hard to walk to the carnival entrance but my body was telling me no. I was literally unable to move. I didn't want to move. I just wanted to stay here and drown myself in my tears and sorrows.

I didn't even know where the damn carnival entrance was. Jace and I had walked so much to make it to the cliff that overlooked the pretty view and then I walked a lot because I wanted to get away from the area I had my heart broken into tiny fragments.

I buried my head in my hands to try and block out the noises of cars beeping at each other. I just wanted a moment of silence, is that too much to ask? I screwed my eyes shut as soon as more tears spewed out.

I wondered where Jace was, as much as I felt scared for my life right now in this weird area, I wanted to know that Jace was safe and sound, even if he did just break my heart into shreds and feed it to the dogs. He ran away and he's in this completely new area, for all I know, he could also be bursting into tears in some back alley.

A smartly dressed man with a briefcase walked past me with a can of beer in his hand, he was with a friend, who had a bottle of vodka in his hand and dressed like they belonged in the parliament. They were laughing uncontrollably, literally, you could hear them from the next street. He glowered down at me with pity and started taking out his wallet.

"Dude I'm not a homeless person!" I cried out at him, my voice laced with emotion. I had this lump stuck in my throat and it felt difficult to say a coherent sentence without me choking on my words.

"Then why are you sitting out here? It's freezing cold." He looked towards his friend who shrugged.

"Because I just had my heart broken." I felt the need to rant my problems out, maybe this random stranger could listen. It's not like he knew me and I didn't know him so once I tell him, he won't give a toss.

"Poor thing." He made a pity face, I hated pity. "She must be a right bitch"

"He and I'm not sure about that."

He raised his eyebrows, "this is my boyfriend, Reese."

"Nice." I said nonchalantly. I didn't really care.

"How old are you, boy?"

"Sixteen." I sighed and he looked down at me with more pity. Jesus Christ. He didn't say anything after, just kinda stood there with his vodka bottle in my face.

This was beyond awkward, I just wanted to left alone right now. My mood keeps changing, I thought company would be nice but it just turns out all I'm getting is pity.

"You want some vodka?" His boyfriend asked and giggled and stumbled.

I shrugged. Should I drink? Should I not? I didn't really get a chance to answer anyway.

"Here, this bottle is almost finished. Should be alright." He handed the almost empty bottle to me and I stared at it. Even drunk people don't trust a sixteen year old with a full bottle...

"Reese!" The other guy whined, "he's going to get alcohol poisoning and-"

"It's fine Nick, Its almost finished." He reassured his partner.

The guy that handed me the bottle took out a can of beer from nowhere and started drinking from it.

I looked down at the bottle in my hand. I've never drunk straight before. In fact, I've never really drank anything above a 6% alcohol volume.

I wiped the top of the bottle with my sleeve and I brought it to my lips. The glass felt cold against my dry lips but it didn't bother me too much. 'Nick' looked down at me while I drank from it and then nodded and walked off.

The contents trickled down my throat and it burned. God, how do people drink this stuff straight? I know that Liam can chug down straight vodka.

I swallowed it down before taking another gulp. I relaxed against the brick wall and did more slow inhales and exhaled. For a millisecond, my eyes blurred and it quickly went. Everything was starting to become weird looking, it was all starting to slow down and the area looked like it was spinning.

I looked to the bracelet that was sat soaking in a puddle next to me and glared at the evil demonic thing.

"It's all your fault!" I pointed to it but it didn't reply. Rude much?

"Don't you see what you've done! You've messed up my relationship with Jace!" Still, no reply. "We were.. We were on a roll and you had to ruin it for us!"

"We.. He probably hates me now, r-right?"

Yeah, damn right, I thought to myself.

I was no longer speaking to the satanic thing and instead to myself.

"I fu- I love him! I want Jace, I want him, I want him!" I wiped at the tears in my eyes. A rustling sound came from near me and I could only assume it was a cat. Yeah, a cat that was in the bins like in those movies.

"Jace, why can't.. Why can't he love me back!" More tears fell from my eyes and my whole face was soon wet from tears as well droplets from the rain.

Jace was beyond compare. I always thought that I was lucky to have people like him around in my life but now, well now, I've just ruined it haven't I? I've ruined any chance of us being together and I'v ruined our friendship too.

"Why does heartbreak feel so bad?" I whined to myself, taking another gulp. "Why does my brain hurt so much?"

My vision blurred again when I looked ahead of me. The bright lights from the stores and pubs in front of me flashed in my eyes. Everything seemed so blurry and the flickering of the street lamp was in slow motion... in fact, so was everything else.

My mind continued to complain and question, they were all Jace infested thoughts. "Why doesn't Jace want me? what have I done to deserve this?" I waved my hands around me, motioning to the so called 'mess' that's i've gotton myself in.

"Is it because I'm really that pathetic?"

"or maybe it's because I don't deserve somebody as amazing as Jace."

"or it's because he loves someone else!" I stood up, stumbling a little and nearly face planting the floor. I didn't though, but I also did. I walked up to the pub next to where I was just sitting. "Jace can't love someone else though! He just can't! Oh... it hurts too much."

I took another gulp, the burn I felt as it trickled down my throat was something I was starting to get used to. Just... That look of horror, I can't get it out of my head. I can't get the pain from rejection out of my body, all it's done is made me feel completely worthless and limp.

A bald man stood in front of me and shook me a little. Why was this git shaking me! It's made my headace worsen! Godammit, you evil satanic spawn.

"Go away evil spawn!" I yelled at him.

"What the-"

"Yeah, you 'erd" I glared at him.

"What are you, fourteen? where's your mother?"

"Leave me alone, evil demon! Haven't you done enough?"

"Bro.." another guy came in front of me and placed a reassuring hand on my shoulder. I glanced at it and didn't take my eyes off.

"It's evil mini satans like you that caused him to reject me!" I said. The bald man just stared at me with a blank look.

"Where's your phone?" he asked.

"Up your-"

"Don't even continue that." the other guy said. Who does he think he is trying to tell me what to do? I can't stand these people, I'm too fabulous for them.

I walked away from them, trying my best to balance. I finally reached the place I was just sitting at, opposite the pleasure shop and plopped down, resting my back against the cold, hard bricks. My eyes felt tired but I didn't want to get some shut eye yet, I still had a bunch of ranting to do.

"Jaaaaaceeeee!" I yelled out as if he was nearby and I wanted to call him over.

"Jaaaaaaceee!" I tried again, still no answer. It's a bit rude, if I must say myself.

I slumped back against the wall and huffed, taking deep breaths and keeping my eyes closed. Even when a car pulled up next to me with a familliar engine sound, I continued talking.

"Why does it hurt!"

I heard some mutters of 'oh fuck' before I felt warm hands enclose around me, burning me through the soggy hoodie and t-shirt I was wearing.

"I want Jace! Jace, where are you!"

"Jace... Oh he'll never love me..." I muttered quietly to myself.

"Oh my baby!" A womanly voice shrilled in my ears.

"Oh god." A manly voice spoke, laced with relief, worry and tiredness.

"I see he's a chatty drinker, then." a female spoke.

"Great, just great." The same manly voice said.

I didn't want to open my eyes, I didn't want to face the reality just yet. The world was on hold for me right now and I was willing to let it stay like that for as long as possible.

"I'm just... I'm so pathetic." I started tearing up again and wiped at my eyes. "I'll never find anyone."

"Oh honey..." The womanly voice cooed and I felt my cheek being touched I'm with skinny, frail fingers.

Finally, I opened my eyes. The relief I felt seeing my mother staring down at me with a messy bun in her hair and slippers on her feet was something I had been longing to see.

"Oh, mum!" I chocked on my tears and grabbed her hand, just to make sure she was actually there.

I turned my head a little to see sat in the front seat was my dad. He had one of my beanie's on that he likes to wear and his glasses instead of his contact lenses. In the passenger seat was Molly and next to me was Liam, who was staring out the window, distracted.

"I had the worst first date ever." I sighed and sniffled, "Jace doesn't love me!"

"Why doesn't he love me, huh? What's not to love?"

Nobody replied to me, they just all sat still, silently, with sad looks on their faces.

"Mummy!" I cried, "why?"

"Oh hush, child." Molly said. "You're so loud."

I ignored her, God, what is with everyone telling me what to do nowadays? I'm sick of it! I just want to make my own choices!

"Dad.." I slurred, he hummed, urging me to talk, "boys suck!"

"You're right." he sighed. He probably thought the better of it and knew that I'd keep talking to him until he answers to what I ask.

"I mean, first he's all like 'I really like you too' and then I let out the big L word and then it's.. It's all out the window.."

"Poor baby," mum cooed and pulled me into a hug.

"I'm sure your big bro can go and beat him up." Molly countered and I glared at her. My head turned so quickly that it urged on another headache and my vision to blur again.

"N- no! No beating up!" I turned to Liam, and continuously poked his shoulder. "don't g-go after him!"

"Where is he, speaking of which?" Liam asked, his voice deep as if he just woke up or something.

"I... I don't know! We have to go back and get him because otherwise he'll get eaten by man eating carnies!" I cried and grabbed mum's hand and shook it.

"Oh dear..." She sighed and poked her husband on the shoulder, muttering something in his ear before leaning back in her seat again. "Come here." she cooed in that motherly tone of hers and lay my head down diligently on her shoulder.

She moved the soggy mess that was my hair out of my eye and began running her hands through it. The heaviness of my eyes won over and I shut them, feeling a chaste kiss on my forehead and slowly drifting off into sleep.