《helium》Complainers

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On May 26th, 2003

Aaron Ralston was hiking,

a boulder fell on his right hand,

he waited four days,

he them amputated

his own arm with a pocketknife.

On New Year's Eve,

a woman was bungee jumping,

the word broke,

she fell into a rover

and had to swim back to land

in crocodile-infested waters

with a broken collarbone.

Clarie Champlin was smashed in the face

by a five-pound watermelon

being propelled by a slingshot.

Mathew Brobst was hit by a javelin.

David Striegl was actually

punched in the mouth by a kangaroo.

The most amazing part of these stories

is when asked about the experience

they all smiled, shrugged and said

"I guess things, could've been worse."

So go ahead,

tell me you're having a bad day.

Tell me about the traffic

Tell me about your boss.

Tell me about your job

you've been trying to quit for the past four years.

Tell me the morning is

just a townhouse burning to the ground

and the snooze button is a fire extinguisher.

Tell me the alarm clock

stole the keys to your smile,

drove it into 7 am

and the crash totaled your happiness

Tell me

Tell me how blessed are we to have tragedy

so small it can fit on the tip of our tongues.

When Evan lost his legs he was speechless.

When my cousin was assaulted

she didn't speak for 48 hours.

When my uncle was murdered,

we had to send out a search party

to find my father's voice.

Most people have no idea

that tragedy and silence

often have the exact same address.

When your day is a museum of disappointments,

hanging from events that were outside of your control,

when you feel like your guardian

angel put in his two weeks notice two months ago

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and just decided not to tell you,

when it seems like God

is just a babysitter that's always on the phone,

when you get punched in the esophagus

by a fistful of life.

Remember,

every year

two million people die of dehydration

So it doesn't matter if

the glass is half full or half empty.

There's water in the cup.

Drink it and stop complaining.

Muscle is created by lifting things

that are designed to weigh us down.

When you shoulders are heavy

stand up straight and call it exercise.

Life is a gym membership

with a really complicated cancellation policy.

Remember,

you will survive,

things could be worse,

and we are never given

anything we can't handle.

When the whole world crumbles,

you have to build a new one

out of all the pieces that are still here.

Remember,

you are still here/

The human beats

approximately 4,000 times per hour

and each pulse,

each throb,

each palpitation is a trophy,

engraved with the words

"You are still alive."

You are still alive.

So act like it.

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