indulgence

noun

1. the action or fact of indulging or gratifying a desire

2. an extension of the time in which a bill or debt has to be paid

3. the remission by the pope of the temporal punishment in purgatory that is still due for sins even after absolution

4. foolish or senseless behaviour

My stitches were coming out today and I'd get to see the new ugly scar down my knee properly since the hospital. I've seen it before while bathing, but not with it almost completely healed like it is now. I'm not looking forward to this.

"Do you want me to come with you, Lily?" Mum asked over breakfast the next morning. I shook my head, and worried my lower lip, then finished my juice. When I realised my mother hadn't answer my reply I looked up across the breakfast table and realised she was upset with me.

"Mum?"

"Lily, I know you are growing up now, but I'm still you mother. I'd like to come with you today when you go back to Dr Styles to get your stitches removed. Let me be mum a little bit longer, OK?"

"Me too, me too!" Jac-Jac yelled.

"Nope, squirt. You're coming with me to the office this morning, then you and I are going on a play date." Wallace, finished his coffee and stood up from his seat.

"Play date?" Jac-Jac and I asked at the same time, then looked at each other and giggled.

"Stereo surround sound, like pixies are flying around the sun room." Wallace wiped Jack's face and hands with a wash cloth a maid delivered, then he collected his son from the high chair.

"Wait,wait. Fwying kisses, fwying kisses!" Wallace 'flew' him around to collect kisses from mummy and me. Wallace then followed them up, giving out the same kisses, planting one on my head, which shocked me. I looked up at him but he'd already walked away with my cutie little brother.

"Don't look so stunned. He's proud of you, like a real daughter." My mum held a smirk on her face, watching my reaction to Wallace's affection.

"I'm not... I..." I really don't know how to think about that. I mean, 'before' everyone in this mansion hated me so much that I had to get out as fast as I could. At least that is what my 17 year old mind felt and perceived at the time.

I am grateful, don't get me wrong. Its just that I'm not sure if their interactions or recipient behaviour to me isn't a making of my own designs. I've become a bloody good manipulator. I learned, oh how I learned so much, the first time around. I had to survive somehow, and we humans are really great at adapting to our environments. It got me thinking about my behaviour, how I interacted with them all this time around.

Does Wallace really appreciate me as a person and is beginning to see me as a daughter out of his own volitions? I don't think so. Is he intrigued with my business acumen and growing maturity? Probably? Does it matter. Nope. It doesn't. Because I still get what I want and he gets a well behaved step daughter that makes his new wife and young son happy. Isn't that what I'm trying to portray here? Wasn't that the goal when I first spoke to mum about her marrying Wallace Overmeyer in the first place?

Do I feel slightly guilty at being the two faced white lotus with far superior acting skills? A little voice at the back of my mind quietly asks and I shut her down. Hard.

Mum helps me get my stuff together for the day and leads me into the car with her driver. I have my school clothes on and my back pack. The drive to the Doctors private clinic is done in silence. I have assignments and work lists going around in my brain.

"You're quiet this morning, honey." Mum interrupts my ponderings.

"Thinking about school work and the company. I have another employee or contractor to introduce myself to this week before I can begin the app build, but I don't know who he is. I only know he goes to our school."

"How will you find him if you need him so badly?"

"Online, I think. But I'm not sure if he will take the job or not, but I really need him."

"OK, well I'm sure you will sort it out. I'm enjoying seeing you blossom in your new dreams, Lily. I'm really proud of you." Mum gives me a side hug then helps me out of the car as we arrive.

"Good morning, Miss Lily. How are you doing? How is the knee? And problems with it so far?"

Dr Styles helps me up onto the examination bed and unlatches the brace. He removes the bandaging and sterile coverings and then pokes and prods.

"I wont test the mobility in your knee at this stage, as things are still healing inside, but the scar is healing up really nicely. We will get the plastic surgeon onto fix this once your new ligament graft has healed completely."

"Will you need to remove the screws from the bones?" I ask, worried about another surgery.

"Nope. They will stay inside your knee as an extra anchor for the bone to grow around."

"The bone will grow back?' Mum asks.

"Yes, in the screw holes of the tibia and femur, the bone will grow back over the holes we drilled and the screws will stay there to keep everything together. So far so good." He covered and rewrapped my leg then washed his hands and sat at his desk beside my mother.

"Physio. I understand you have already been up and about from the third day post surgery. You have also been to school, yesterday yes? I think that was a little unwise. We are now on day eight, which is a great time to begin your physical therapy. I have recommended a woman who Mr Overmeyer has already checked and she is happy to come to your home twice a day for the next month."

"Yes, Wallace gave me her number. I'll call her and see if she's free to begin with Lily today. Is this OK, Lily?"

"Yes, that's fine. Thank you." I was getting the brace on my knee and sorting out my rumpled school clothing while they chatted about the physio. "Thank you for getting me a female therapist, the thoughtfulness is kind."

"OK, so we will see you again in two weeks and hopefully you will have started weight bearing and have some mobility back in your knee. If all goes well, you will be back to running and doing sports within the year."

"Thank you Dr Styles, for everything you have done. I've got a little thank you gift for you, for saying thanks." I pulled out the small gift box from my school bag and handed it over.

"You didn't have to do this. I'm old friend of your new family." He took the gift anyway and opened it.

"Merlot infused Longjing tea with a ball shaped tea strainer with a tiny dragon on the cup clip. I understand, this is lovely. Dragon tea with a dragon strainer. Very thoughtful. Thank you, Miss Lily." His smile was pleasing and self indulgent.

Yep. Nailed that thank you gift!