Dishes were never really my forte.

Honestly, if the pressure of Koushi finding out that I'm a dirty slob didn't exist, I really would have just thrown the plate away. I wasn't really used to using real kitchenware anyways, the daily takeout that I tended to pick up always included disposable products.

That all being said, when Koushi tried to volunteer to take care of the dishes, I just couldn't accept it. I had already put him through more than enough for the night so it was the most I could do to let him relax while I made my best attempt at washing the dishes.

And that's where I found myself now. Standing at the sink, heavily regretting the time that my dishwasher broke and I just thought: 'I don't even wash the dishes; I might as well not even pay to get it fixed'. Even though there weren't that many dishes, to begin with, the fact of the matter was that this could have all been avoided.

I let out a small sigh, mentally deciding that it would probably be for the better if I just stopped worrying about dish problems and just finished the task.

As I continued, since my thoughts had drifted from dishes, they moved onto a topic just a tad more complicated. Obviously, that topic being Koushi.

After everything that happened tonight, I couldn't really tell where we would stand. I could only imagine the conversations that we would have when I go to pick up Tobio in the following days. But, in all honesty, before I had a little playground crush but everything was starting to feel different.

I felt stupid saying it because the cause was doomed before it really even started. There was no way that he would ever be into me. In fact, I know the only reason this all happened was because he's way too nice for his own good.

He was patient.

He was soft and kind.

He was perfect.

And he was going to be the absolute death of me.

When Tobio's mom and I split, I had originally made it a pact with myself that I would never get involved with someone else romantically. Tobio would always be the most important chapter in my life and it was only right that he'd be the one to take up all my time.

I also told myself that, if for any reason there was someone who broke through my barriers, I vowed that they would have to treat my son like he hung the moon. And honestly, I thought it was a little impossible. Not because Tobio was anything short of perfect but because not a lot of people harbored enough love in their heart that could convince me.

Sure, there had been a handful of times where I met someone and thought that maybe they would be different. Each and every single time, I was just let down.

Soon enough it was just me and Tobio against the world and for a long time, it was fine that way.

We survived just fine, me, him, along with Asahi, Yuu, and Shoyou. Those were really the only people we let into our lives.

After Kageyama's mom, I learned that you can't really trust everyone. Kiyoko, while beautiful, had a lot of secrets. The person I thought I knew, I thought I loved, turned out to be a completely different person.

Before I knew it, I felt hot tears running down my face. I hadn't even noticed that I was crying. Quickly, I whipped my face and finished the last of the dishes, not that there was even that many left.

When I did finally finish, I quickly stopped in the bathroom to make sure that I was fully put together before even attempting to face Koushi again.

Looking at my reflection in the mirror, I didn't really recognize myself. Sure, it was me but it didn't feel like me, it didn't look like me.

Honestly, I couldn't say if it was a bad feeling or a good one. I was feeling things that I had kept harbored inside myself for years and in a way it was liberating but it hurt so bad at the same time.

Attempting to put all of that aside, telling myself I'll wait until Koushi leaves to mope, I splashed some cold water on my face. Whatever is going on, I'll find it out and overcome it the best I can, but that will just have to wait.

After looking at myself one more time, I walked out of the bathroom and made my way back to the living room.

On my way there, I couldn't help but notice the soft sound of rain that was coming down from outside. I didn't really notice it before but it was very clear now but I didn't think much of it.

Rounding the final corner, the living room finally made its way into my view. The first thing I saw was Koushi's mass of hair peeking out from the couch.

The room was quiet for the most part except for the T.V. that was still playing reruns of volleyball games and the soft breathing from what I assumed was the boys.

Rounding the couch, I saw one of the cutest things I've seen probably ever.

Koushi and Tobio were leaning against each other sleeping. Tobio had a surprising habit of being a very cuddly sleeper, so he had his face nuzzled into Koushi's side and one of his tiny arms thrown over the man's legs.

As cute as it was, I kind of had to decide how or even if I should wake the boys up. They looked so comfortable but at the same time, Koushi had a home of his own and a life of his own. And no matter how much he tried to deny it, he was probably getting fed up with me.

Just as I made the decision to wake the grey-headed man up, a crash of thunder rang out followed by the sound of hard rain hitting the surface of the house.

I could really say that I was mad because that was a clear lie. I secretly wanted Koushi to stay but I would never tell anyone that.

First, I peeled Tobio from Koushi. As I took him into my arms, he woke up for a hot second and mumbled some nonsensical words before just drifting back to sleep. Even though he couldn't see me, I smiled down at him before carefully taking him upstairs to his room.

As I pulled back the sheets to his bed and began to lay him down, he once again woke up and started talking again. Except for this time, he was fully aware.

A little sleepy but aware.

"Is Mr.Sugawara gonna live with us?" he asked innocently, rubbing his eyes.

I chuckled at him a little, tucking him in tightly before answering.

"No, I don't think so."

"Awh, he makes really good food. And he knows a lot about volleyball.", it was hard to believe that, just a few days prior, the boy wouldn't have even batted an eye if the grey-haired man had died.

I hummed to let him know I was listening but didn't really say anything.

"I really like him, dad. We should keep him.", subconsciously I jokingly mused the 'keep your friends and your enemies closer' saying causing me to let out a real, deep laugh.

"Tobio, he's not a puppy. We can't adopt him."

Lightly, the small boy raised his hand and patted my cheek.

"Consider it, big guy."

And with that, he yawned, smuggled himself into the sheets, and drifted off to sleep.

As I left Tobio's room and headed back downstairs, I thought about what Tobiojust told me.

Knowing my own son, or what I thought I knew, it was hard for him to really come around to people. Tobio really had done a fill 180 from where we were before, now he was asking to keep him like he's a stray cat he stumbled upon.

There had to be a reason behind it but I'm sure it's not anything to worry too much about.

And as once again reached the living room and looked down and the man sleeping on the couch, I still didn't understand.

As I gently picked him up, bridal style, and carried him up the stairs, I still didn't understand.

Honestly, it wasn't until I made my way to my room and got Koushi into my bed that there was something that clicked. Looking down at him, snuggled in my comforter sound asleep, I understood.

And right then and there, my world as I knew it came crashing down