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The pungent odor of blood lingers in the air of the infirmary as I walk into the closed confines of white stoned walls with Ursula by my side.

The health centres of Seagill are situated on the island of the capital city inside the huge over-ground stone castle. Building a health center underwater wasn't the wisest choice and hence we have it on the islands.

"Are you sure he's in this room unit?" I ask my second-in-command to receive a silent nod from her.

Ursula had remained so quiet throughout the whole journey here and now I knew the exact reason why.

The moment I'd received news about Layla's yet another attack on my kingdom, I'd ditched everything and rushed here with Ursula leaving everyone else back in Lycor's castle.

They'd wanted to accompany but with a stubborn 'NO' from me had them sighing and staying back. Zander had looked like he'd wanted to object but then he must've seen something in Ursula and my face that had him walking away from the place in annoyance and something else I didn't quite had the energy to figure out.

He was disappointed, that much was clear. And disappointment brings me to the present. . .

The disapproving looks are evident cleary on the faces of the other patient's family members as I approach the merman laying on one of the beds at the far end of the infirmary.

The red-head merman laid completely pale as blood poured out from the deep stab wound at his torso. His eyes were squeezed shut in pain and his sharp handsome features were covered in gashes. The merman was the best commander in Seagill's army and a great friend to me. He's also Ursula's son.

"Phillip," I call out his name as gently as possible ignoring the scathing looks given by my folks behind my back which they think I'm not noticing or even if they knew, they didn't care.

The merman with dark red hair flutters open his shut eyelids very slowly as though even that action is costing him a lot.

I feel the tug of guilt in my heart as his eyes remain half shut no matter how much he tries to open them.

"It's okay. You don't have to open your eyes if it's hurting." I place a hand on his bare shoulder trying to ease him.

The merman lets out a tired sigh, "Yo-you-your high...."

"It's okay, don't speak. And you don't have to call me by the title, you know that Phil." I feel my heart squeeze in a painful way as a tired smile adorns the beautiful man's face.

"I-i wa-want to..." He speaks through heavy breaths.

"But-"

"I won't make it." This time his words don't waver and that has my heart stumbling.

"You will. Don't speak rubbish. Ilanthra will treat you. You'll be fine." I grab his pale hand and hold it tight.

Phil coughs causing blood to spill out of his mouth at the action.

"Don't move too much." I beg keeping my hold on his hand firm, "You'll be fine, Phil."

"I won't, Marilla." This time his brown eyes flutter open and stare right at me, "You do know I've always loved you, right?"

My grip on his hand wavers the slightest bit but I still hold on.

I knew. I actually knew. . .

But I stayed away because I didn't want to hurt him. He, no every merfolk I got along with, knew I'd never settle with them. Even if they're my mate.

What happened with my parents. . .I just don't want that kind of fate for myself.

Love isn't something that ends you in any good.

Atleast I don't think it does.

A warm hand touching my cheek has me looking back at Philip. He stares through half-open eyelids. Pain coates his each sharp feature as he holds my face.

"You're so much more than you think you are, Marilla. Your mother didn't choose you to be the queen without a reason. There's a very valid reason." He doubles over with coughs spitting blood on the white sheets of the hospital bed.

"It's okay. You don't have to speak. You're going to hurt yourself more." This time, tears prick my eyes as I beg him to quiten down.

Phillip smiles a sweet smile, "You're caring under the tough mask. That's why I fell for you."

"Phil. . ."

"But your mother, she didn't choose you because of this alone. There's something I've been holding back from you. I don't know the whole thing. But I do know that 'they' have held back your powers. You're supposed to be much much more powerful than you are now. Layla knows the truth. But if she tells you, don't let her break you, Marilla." His words were like ice cold water thrown over me.

"What do you mean? Who are they?"

Instead of answering my questions, Phillip's eyes dim as he gazes sideways at the other patients.

"I know your love for your sister won't let you kill her but you have to do it one day. Look at what she had done." His other hand shakily lifts as he gestures at the many injured merfolks sprawled on the hospital beds around us who were barely breathing.

My heart hurt for them but it hurt more when I saw the pure disdain and hatred on their weeping family member's faces. Hatred for me.

I could've stopped all this from happening if only I'd have ended Layla long ago. . .but I didn't. Their hatred for me was justifiable.

I've risked so many lives just because I couldn't kill the main person behind these attacks. Not because I can't physically. Me being the queen automatically intensifies my powers than Layla's but my own conscience won't let me harm her.

"Marilla. . ." Phillip's whispering voice has me glancing back at him in alarm.

"Phil, you're. . ." My eyes grow wide as I see the way his face turn bluer by each second.

"I w-wish I were your m-mate." He mutters in a long labored breath before shutting his eyes.

I feel the blood drain from my body as his hand fall limp in my hold. Phil doesn't move. He stays motionless as ever.

"No! No! No!" I scream holding his shoulders and trying to shake him awake.

Phillip doesn't react. A heavy mournful silence follows in the infirmary as every merfolk present quietly weep for their head commander.

"No..." I hold Phillip's hand to my face.

"Marilla," Ursula places a hand on my shoulder giving it a gentle but firm squeeze, "Get up. It's not the time to sit and weep. Do what a queen is supposed to do. I thought you better than this. Your mother expected better than this from you."

Through blurry vision, I look up at the woman who just lost her son. Her eyes held unshed tears herself but she refused to let a single drop roll down. Instead, more than pain of loosing her son, I saw vengeance in her eyes. Vengeance for Layla.

"But Phil-"

"He died saving the merfolks. He died saving Seagill. Like his father, my son died in honour. And as his mother, I couldn't be more proud of him." She brushed away the mist from the corner of her eyes.

Turning to her son, she places a tender kiss to his head before focusing her emerald eyes right at me, "Enough Marilla. We've had enough of her. You have to end this one way or another. You're a great queen. Don't let this one pest make your own people hate you."

"I. . . I don't know. I do try. I always do but I just can't. When I'm so close to shoving the dagger into her chest, I stop. . ." At this point, I knew everyone around were listening but I couldn't care less.

"Well, then you need to stop caring for her and harden your heart. This isn't just about you anymore." Ursula's words are like shards of ice as if she's no longer going to take any of my crap.

The truth of it stings more than anything. The fact that even the last person who tried to understand my actions was done with me. But then I couldn't blame her.

Ursula lost her husband while he tried to save my parents from the hunters. And now she lost her son too while he tried to save my kingdom from Layla.

"I'll try." A meek whisper leaves my mouth as I stare at the many people laying on the beds.

They didn't deserve this. They didn't deserve to suffer because my stupidity.

When I was small, mother used to tell me.

There should never come a time when you would have to discriminate just because it's your own blood. Blood or not, wrong is wrong. And what is wrong, should never be let off.

I knew I should've done this long ago, but I just can't. They wouldn't understand. They just wouldn't. . .

But again I didn't blame them. They're looking upto their queen to save them. It's my duty to do so. And all I've been doing so far is failing them. Failing my mother's promise to protect them.

"I'll try." I say again.

No one speaks. Not even Ursula. As if they already know I won't go along with my promise. Just like the last few times.

Their disappointment has me feeling more terrible than ever. When the disproval radiating of off them starts getting suffocating,

"I'll just go see what I can do." I manage to get out the words before making my way towards the door in a haste.

I'm just barely few steps out of the room and in the castle hallways when a voice stops me,

"I heard your sister tried to kill you."

My gaze flicks upto Zander's form leant against the coral blue walls. His grey eyes are fixated on me in a hawk-like way as if he was trying to figure out something.

I didn't care what he was doing here. I didn't even have the energy to speak to him right now or ask. So I just pause and look at him silently.

"Your folks want you to kill her." He continued, his words more like a statement than a question.

Zander straightened himself from the wall and took a step towards me, "But you don't want to." This time he spoke in a whisper as if finally coming to a conclusion, "Not because you don't care about your folks, but because your love for your sister clouds your justice for the merfolks."

I just stare at him, not speaking a single word. He. . .

Out of everyone to exist, he understood exactly why I couldn't kill Layla. And somehow, the truth of someone finally getting it, had me feeling conflicted and vulnerable.

I hated being vulnerable. That's the core reason of why. . .

I fought the tears I'd been holding back so long from flowing. I can't cry in front of him. No, I won't.

So I did what I'm best at.

Gulping the lump in my throat, I focused my attention away from Zander and back to the hallway ahead fully intended on running away from the situation.

And I actually succeeded till two steps but then a hand grabs my wrist making me halt on my steps.

"Fish, don't run. I know it's not easy. I'd wanted to end my father when he had joined hands with Charlotte and let her take my mother's place while my mother was captured away somewhere. Even Helvon was in chaos then and as the heir, it was my duty to save the kingdom by killing the traitor. But I couldn't because deep down I did love that man. He was my father afterall. So trust me, I understand better than anyone how conflicted it feels when you know you could fix everything but you aren't able to because of your own conscience."

The tenderness in his words breaks something in my resolute but I hold it strong. Turning to face him, I try to yank my hand out of his hold.

"Let me go." My voice is as raspy as my throat as I fight with all my might to make him leave my hand.

"Fish, what happened?" He asks softly, his other hand grabbing my other wrist and holding it up close to his chest.

My struggles just increase as I claw at him to make him leave my hands. When he seems to notice the maddening rage in me, he lets go of my hand gently.

"Okay, relax. I won't hold your hand." He raises his hand in surrender.

But I don't stop.

I hit his chest instead. Something in me just snapped at the way he tries to act all soft and gentle despite my psycho attempts.

No one's supposed to be soft with me! People are supposed to chastise me on my mistakes and tell me how horrible I am for risking so many lives!

So I hit his chest with balled fists harder because his caring personality right now doesn't feel the least bit right. I don't deserve it.

Zander blinks in surprise probably wondering what devil possessed me but I couldn't care less.

I hit him continously until he seems to take no more and grabs my wrists again.

"Woah, Marilla stop it-" His words cut short in his throat as I look up at him through blurry vision.

Something shifts in his grey eyes and I don't know what happens but the next moment, I find myself being pulled into a warm embrace.

And that was all it takes for my resolute to break completely and cry like a pathetic weak girl in the arms of my mate.