For the record, I truly believed the dinner was going legendary, despite the fact that Luna was here. The grounds were so large, there was bare heads that I actually believed I could successfully avoid her. I also believed I could avoid Lucas, despite the fact that I was here with his pal Hervé. I was even having a somewhat decent conversation with Tosh and Harrigan, Tosh's wife was having a baby and Tosh was a bit stressed about it, Harrigan was impressed by some notes I gave him earlier on the site plan. It was all standard stuff and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't dancing inwardly about how far we'd moved from sexist jokes to this.

"If it isn't Funke Obatunde from the newest architectural firm in town..." Luna says leaning over Harrigan and glaring at me

"You look lovely Luna. How have you been?" I chime as genially as I could mate

I smile my brightest most innocent smile at her

"Or is it a subsidiary of Lucas' The Arc? I don't quite get the partnership bit..." She adds, turning to Harrigan now

"I think it takes a lot for two firms to work across differences in order to bring a project like this together." Tosh announces, which only earns him a glare from Luna

She might be glaring but I'm proper shook that Tosh recognized how hard I was working across differences with Lucas.

"It's far easier to compete than it is to collaborate." Harrigan agrees which shifts the air considerably, not just because I was starting to see them as mates, colleagues, allies and such but because Luna had this "Et tu Brutus" look on her face like she'd just been stabbed by people she'd expected solace from

This conversation was suddenly looking long so I quickly turn to Hervé, whose standing next to our least favourite "Chris Pine but with brown eyes and blonder hair" category winner. Hervé smiles as I try and tell him to get his noble ass all the way over here so he can save me from the shambolic that is about to occur. The fact that the two best mates were standing there with drinks in their hands watching us like this was an extra episode of Love Island...

Thankfully Hervé understands what I'm not saying. He mumbles something to Lucas and then walks to us, a cheeky look in his eyes. I don't know what he's just said to Whitlam but the Abercrombie and Fetch model downs his entire glass of scotch and starts coming towards us as well.

"Not you mate! Stay there!" I want to say as Hervé rests his arm over my shoulder and greets the trio around me.

This wasn't the plan at all! I'd asked him to dash me an escape, not join the conversation! I swear these royals aren't any good for a damn thing!

"You must be Luna, Funke's told me quite a bit about you." Hervé charmingly chimes reaching to greet my ex

"Your grace... Duke Angelford, only good things I hope" Luna coos

Allow it babe! He'd never commission you for anything this useless bampot of a gossip girl! He's just here for the tea! Luna only talks like this to money. I knew her well enough to see all the signs. I'd learned this from her!

"From what she's told me you inspired her to start her own firm..."

I smile sheepishly at that, watching Luna's gaze soften slightly at the statement. OK, maybe there's something to the nobility's charm that I could learn from. How had he... disarmed...her like that.

"I just think it's so beautiful that two women, especially women of colour, can come together in an industry that's so white and male and still have time to uplift, encourage and inspire each other. I'm looking to support more of that." He adds and suddenly Luna's the Oprah of the architectural industry and I'm the first graduate from her school for girls.

Mxm, the clownery!

It wasn't until slightly later in the night when I was trying to decide if it was professional to eat all the fried shrimp, because I'd just earlier decided it was stereotypical/not a good look/ racist if I ate all the chicken pops in front of these white people. I'd have asked Hervé to sneak the tray of chicken pops for me but he was currently chatting up some lush sket he knew from god knows where, a marchioness if I'd heard right, almost Lucas type except for her choice in makeup being less 60s and more "I spend a lot of money to look like I just got out the bath". The only other person who would've fought for my rights to eat chicken shamelessly in white publics was Lucas, and lord knows where he'd fucked off to. So fried shrimp it was! Or so I thought until Harrigan subtly sidled up beside me to let me know that Luna had previously engaged them, Tosh and He, to sabotage this project.

Camille Belle as Liesel "Spends a lot of money to look like she just stepped of a bath" Rockford

Now Harrigan wasn't a man of many words, but he made up for it by only speaking truth bombs and air horns. I'd come to like that about him even though at first it gave me the creepers. So when he volunteered information that my hurt ex who had gaslighted and broken up with me because of this project had, from the very beginning used some of her power to get her connections to ensure that I wouldn't get the project and then that the project wouldn't happen... I was so vexxed I didn't quite know what to eat!

The first thing I did, of course, was call his Lordship moneybags up to confirm that Luna had been actively against my receiving the commission. Angus, as he insisted I call him, had pretty much confirmed that Luna had met with him and given testimony as my past employer that I wouldn't be able to carry out a project of such a scale. She'd even cited all the responsibility that apparently I'd refused to take on while I worked for her, which was why she'd had to let me go. Bollocks! I am as shook and vexxed and miffed and confused as you are, because Luna never wanted me to work on anything if she wasn't there to hold my hand through it!

"Funke...you're a talent and there'll be people who are threatened by that. I choose your concept because you're a talent, but don't think for a minute that there's allies in this world. It's harsh out here if you're naive and trusting, just ask Lucas." Angus, I suppose attempts to assure me

I was shaking at this point, and didn't have a smoke with me. I had to sit there and eat my shrimp like this.

This was worse than when mum made me watch titanic and then got mad at ME for pointing out they could've both fit on that stupid plank of wood yeah? I was shaking with rage and anger and I really wanted to be upset but mostly I was sad. I was sad that someone I loved and cherished and had been with for three years of my life had done this to me. I was sad because now I wasn't sure that any of it was real! I didn't want to have to live like that mate! Wondering if I was jokes to the person I'm talking to. Obviously I wanted to thank Harrigan for coming to me with this information, His Lordship direct descendant of Braveheart Angus for being honest with me, my mum for being the one I could text about this madness with tears balancing in my eyes.

I wanted to leave so badly but I had to be professional, innit. I had to sit there and not cry and not do anything stupid. So I drank instead. A little booze just to numb all the emotions.