People were created to be loved. Things were created to be used. The reason why the world is chaos, is because things are being loved and people are being used.

- John Green

"Are you ready?" Draco asked as the Hogwarts Express rolled into King's Cross station. Easter break had arrived too quickly.

"Yes", I chuckled. "I hate you, you're a horrible person and I want to throw you off the London Bridge." Draco grinned and squeezed my hand softly before taking a step back.

"Sounds about right." During the last break, I genuinely didn't like Draco all that much, but it was still incredibly difficult to act like I hated him, because I didn't want him to think it was real. Now it was more like some sort of game to play. He knew I didn't mean it and I knew that whatever insult he would throw at me over the course of the break would not be true either. It was a little competition. Who could put up the best act?

Maybe it had always been like that, a game. He used to drive the blood from under my nails, but still I continued engaging in it. In some way, it was exciting, a rush of adrenaline. A constant competition.

But I did genuinely hate him. Every insult I had thrown at him before last year came from the bottom of my heart. We despised each other. And why? Because we thought the other was better than us.

The train door slid open and we walked out. There weren't many students on the train as not many went home for Easter break. The platform was also quite void of parents, making it not very hard to notice that my mother was not here to pick me up. I hesitated for a little while, but I could not stand here like a lost little sheep. I could either go straight to the Floo Network, or ...

"Narcissa!" I said happily as I approached her. I knew I had to ignore Draco, but I was still good with his mother, I had always been. I had replied to her letter last week, telling her that Draco was fine, and luckily, he did look okay, even though it had only been a week since he didn't. I made sure he ate well and slept well and I'd get him to be back to full health by the end of the year.

I hoped to continue writing letters back and forth with Narcissa, picking up the old habit again. She was more like a mother to me than the woman at Selwyn Keep.

"Hello darling, how have you been?" she asked, hugging me shortly.

"Quite alright", I smiled. Draco approached, so I took a step back. There were parents around. Narcissa noticed her son and hugged him quickly too. I could see her eyes analysing his every feature, noticing the weight loss.

"Anyway, I'll come by soon so we can catch up, but I ought to go home now, I suppose", I said a little awkwardly. I couldn't stare at him for too long.

Narcissa looked around and soon came to the same conclusion.

"I'll apparate us there quickly. You shouldn't be bothered with the sooth in the Floo Network right now", she winked. She grabbed my hand and linked her arm through Draco's whilst getting out her wand. I closed my eyes as the familiar feeling of apparition washed over me.

I always had mixed feelings when seeing Selwyn Keep. It was rather beautiful in spring, with the garden in bloom and the ivy thriving on the old stone walls. It could be a lovely home, but the memories that were inside of it had made it quite difficult to savor the beauty on the outside.

"Be sure to come by whenever you want, okay?" Narcissa said. "Our door is always open for you." I nodded and smiled at her. My eyes flickered to Draco shortly and there probably wasn't anyone around to be wary of, but it felt a little awkward to talk to him with his mother present.

"I'll see you soon", I said before turning around. I took a deep breath before walking towards the stone building. The familiar sound of apparition sounded again, but I didn't feel sad to know that he was gone. It would only be for a little over a week and then we'd be back at Hogwarts. It would be fun, bickering with Draco for a few days.

I opened the large door of the castle and slipped in. I noticed Daisy on the other side of the hall, looking quite excited at my arrival.

"Miss Selwyn is back!" she chimed as she hopped over. "Daisy has made tea for you Miss Selwyn, your favourite." I took the cup from her hands and was met with a very pleasant berry smell.

"Thank you, Daisy", I grinned. She nodded excitedly before hurrying off. I walked around the main floor for a bit, taking in the house that I should consider my home. I found my mother in the sun room, a stack of papers in her hand. I could only figure they were business investments, as my mother wouldn't be caught dead doing something like reading for fun, writing or drawing. I used to like drawing quite a lot, but I was never allowed to practice a whole lot because my mother thought of it as a waste of time, just like writing. The only hobbies she allowed were reading in the library, because at least it would improve my linguistic skills, and playing the grand piano. I hated the latter though, as I was always handed terribly boring pieces by my many piano teachers. But it screamed class, so I had to master it, even if I didn't want to.

"Good day mother, I'm back for Easter break', I said, straightening my back. She didn't even look up. She didn't acknowledge my existence. I hoped father would get out of Azkaban soon. It had been nine months. I ignored the odd feeling and went upstairs to my room. I could handle a week of reading in the library. I had enough school work to spend the time with.

Life at Malfoy Manor was tense to say the least. There were whispers in every corner and you could sense that something was brewing, but I wasn't sure yet what it was.

I had just given the Dark Lord an update about my task and when I exited the room, I heard him tell aunt Bellatrix "Get me the Selwyn girl. I want to know what she has to say." He seemed to have taken a liking into Eleanor and that didn't sit right with me. If it'd go on like this, she'd be one too, a Death Eater.

I didn't want that for her. The mark hurt and I didn't want her to hurt. Moreover, I knew she wasn't truly on this side and the mark would only reject her, posing even more of a danger.

I had to wait another day before I saw her again. I was fine with not seeing her for a few days, but I couldn't help but feel a little excited at the thought. We had discussed it thoroughly on the way back to London. We'd have to hate each other and something about it seemed fun. We got to revisit the old times, see how far we'd come.

I often thought about those times, when I'd call her names and when she would get on my very last nerve. How we loved to drive the blood from under each other's nails. It was a hobby to get the other to feel inferior, always that race to the top.

And then we gave up on that race and we just walked the rest of the track together.

The flames lit up and her small frame appeared. She looked stunning as always, dressed in a classy black dress and her long hair down in casual curls. She caught my gaze and I winked at her very briefly, making sure no one had noticed. I then turned around and scoffed, like fourth-year Draco would have done.

"Draco, be nice", mum said. I hadn't told her about how Eleanor and I were doing and she didn't ask me about it since there was no safe place to talk here, but she knew to some extent. She had felt the tension when we dropped her home.

I wondered how she was doing at Selwyn Keep. Her mother didn't even come to pick her up and I hated the woman for it. I wasn't on the best terms with my father, but at least my mother cared, too much sometimes. Eleanor didn't even have that, and still she stood there, proud to be a Selwyn, chin up and a mysterious smile around her lips.

All her life she tried to fit the Selwyn mold, to be like two people that she secretly despised. Why did she try so hard to please people who didn't care about her?

"Nice to see you, Narcissa, you too, Bellatrix", she said as she walked over, sitting down in one of the armchairs in front of the window. She then turned my way, a bored look in her eyes.

"Draco", she sighed. I rolled my eyes at her, smiling internally. This was quite amusing. Aunt Bellatrix thought so too as she chuckled at the sight.

"Do you ever plan on marrying, Eleanor?" she asked, inspecting her long, black nails.

"At least not that", she said venomously, purposely turning away from me.

"As if I'd want that", I spat. It was a good question though. Did I want to marry her? I wasn't quite sure if I wanted to get married in general, as it didn't really do any good to my parents, but if I did, it'd be with her. There was no one else for me.

"You offend my little nephew, Eleanor", Bellatrix said, but a smile lingered on her lips. She liked Eleanor's spike. "Maybe we'll have to find someone new for him. Someone with less high standards. The Greengrasses have two daughters. Maybe the younger one is better suited, as boys take a few years extra to mature."

I raised my eyebrows. I was standing right there, but aunt Bellatrix didn't care. She didn't care about much. She had the same spike Eleanor had, but she just lacked any empathy, which made that spike dangerous.

"No thank you", I gritted. I had my fair share of Daphne Greengrass last year and it was not a time I wanted to revisit.

"Eleanor Selwyn, upstairs", I heard. I looked to the side to see Snape at the bottom of the staircase, a placid look on his face. I really didn't like the man.

Eleanor nodded and stood up. I stuck my foot out to make her trip, but she just hopped over elegantly, like I had expected her to.

"She's way above you, Draco", Bellatrix laughed as she noticed. I scowled at her, but I didn't feel any envy or anger. She was above me, I had accepted that over the past year. She was above anyone in our year. I was just lucky that she chose me anyway.

"You asked for me, my Lord?" I asked as I walked into the office.

"Yes, close the door", he said. I did so and walked towards the desk he was standing behind, looking out into the garden of Malfoy manor. It felt like only a few weeks since I had been here.

"Draco tells me he's almost finished", he said slowly. I knew that this was the most important briefing out of all of them. If I convinced the Dark Lord that Draco couldn't do it, he'd get started on the back-up task he had in mind, whatever it was.

For a brief moment the option seemed alluring, so Draco wouldn't have to fulfill the task, but then I remembered what would happen to him if he didn't. I had to buy him time.

"I'm reluctant to admit it", I sighed. "But I think he's right." Lord Voldemort turned around and looked at me carefully, trying to figure me out. I had to be more detailed.

"I've inspected the cabinet he's working on and it seems to be working most of the time. He's been struggling on perfecting it for a while though, so he might still fail", I said, and then very softly, as if I was reluctant to admit it, I added: "But I think he won't."

I had practiced it a few times, as I didn't have anything else to do anyway.

"You have trust in the boy?" the Dark Lord asked after a while. Yes, was the answer, but I couldn't say that.

"Of course not, but even a first-year should be able to fix a Vanishing Cabinet in ten months." It was a fat lie, I had no idea how to fix such a thing, but it didn't matter.

It was quiet for a very long time and I felt the need to say it, to say the one thing that wasn't a lie. I believed it fully, although I hadn't said it out loud yet.

"I think he can fix the cabinet in time, but I don't think he has what it takes to actually kill Dumbledore."

It was true. I didn't think he could do it. He'd have to in the end and I'd try to help him get there by telling him that it was okay and that he wasn't a monster for following that order, but I didn't think that he could actually do it in the end, at least not now. But he'd have to in the end, there was no other choice.

"Do you have what it takes, Eleanor Selwyn?" he asked. The question scared me. What was I supposed to reply to that? It was the first time that he had asked me a question that left me wondering what he wanted to hear. This man was not a fool, he'd look straight through a "yes, I am", but what consequences did me telling "no" have?

"I don't believe so", I said after a while, carefully thinking over my next words. "I'd like to say yes, to think that I'm powerful and courageous enough, but I still have a lot more growing to do, so at the moment, I don't believe I have what it takes."

The Dark Lord didn't say anything for a very long time. He just went back to staring out of the window. If I looked carefully, I could see one of the peacocks in the garden, white ones. It always gave me a warm feeling in my chest. Maybe Draco couldn't produce one now, but he had done so prior to receiving the mark and I would never let him forget that it was a dragon.

"You're a wise, young girl, Eleanor Selwyn", the Dark Lord said eventually. "You might be a valuable asset in the future. We could use more young people like you." I nodded and then he signaled for me to leave him. I walked out and closed the door behind me again.