I got a little close and that is all it took. I was captured. Because sometimes that is what happens when the heart recognizes home.

- JmStorm

Time seemed to have lost its meaning as February and March passed by like a breeze. It for sure was a boring year at Hogwarts. Other than Umbridge walking around as if she owned the place, things were rather normal.

Adrian had tried talking to me several times, but I kept ignoring him until he stopped. I didn't care.

The most surprising outcome of the entire situation was Draco Malfoy. He had completely stopped being mean towards me. I didn't really speak to him at all, but he didn't try to get a reaction out of me, which was new.

Daphne and Tracey had gotten a lot closer. We had always been friends, but Daphne had always been a bit wary because of Tracey's blood status, but that seemed to be out of the way now. I supposed it was because I didn't talk very much. It was better this way. It led me to be completely focused on school, scoring me immaculate grades in every class.

But apparently some others didn't think so.

"Selwyn, this has to stop right now."

Malfoy stopped in front of me, a frustrated look on his face. We had just started our Thursday patrol and not shared a single word.

"What is it this time?" I asked, crossing my arms defensively.

"This act you've got up. It's got to stop", he said firmly.

"You're talking nonsense, Malfoy, I'm not putting up -"

"Yes you are, Selwyn. Look at yourself!" He grabbed my two shoulders, shaking me gently. "At first I thought it was just your way of dealing with the Pucey situation, but this is getting out of hand. I barely recognize you."

"Isn't that a good thing?" I sighed, uninterested. "You never liked who I was anyway." Malfoy grunted, combing his hand through his hair.

"You even talk in the same tone. I didn't even notice yet because you barely open your mouth. It used to be an accomplishment for you to shut up for two minutes." I blinked a couple times, not sure what his goal was.

"Come on, where is angry Eleanor? Or competitive Eleanor, or impulsive Eleanor? Are you really going to be all depressive over some guy who screwed you over? That's a bit pathetic don't you think?" he said.

"This has nothing to do with Pucey", I frowned, looking down.

"Oh please, do you honestly believe that yourself?" he scoffed.

"Just leave me alone, Malfoy."

"No! I'm not going to leave it alone, because that's what everybody else is already doing and look how much that's helping."

I looked at him for a bit, but I couldn't do it. I couldn't talk to him about it, or to anyone. It had to stay inside, so I walked away.

"I know why you're being like this, Eleanor!" he shouted. "I know why because I do it too."

I stopped. What did he mean? He had no idea what it was like. I heard his footsteps come closer again and soon, he turned me around gently.

"You're doing it because you think it's easier this way. That if you don't let anyone in, no one can hurt you. But it's not a good way to live, Eleanor. It's not."

"Then why are you like that?" He was quiet for a while, looking in the distance, his jaw clenched. And then he looked back at me, his grey ice surprisingly calm after being asked a personal question.

"Because I don't have anything else to go back to. You do, Eleanor, you have your true self to get back to."

I looked at him for a while, not really sure why he was doing this, why he was trying to help me.

"I don't need your help", I said. I turned around again, but he didn't let me. He grabbed my arm and gently pulled me back.

"Are you happy, Eleanor? You're not getting hurt, but are you happy?" he asked quietly. I wanted to give a quick retort, but I couldn't. He was staring so intensely, like he was staring into my soul and the lies refused to roll past my lips.

"Are you?" I asked.

He didn't break eye contact. He just kept staring at me with a serious look in his eyes. Why was he doing this?

"No, I'm not."

"Why not?"

"Because I have no reasons to be happy." I didn't quite know what to say to that. It hurt. I felt pain and it wasn't even my own. I hadn't felt my own pain in over a month.

"Can I ask you something?" he asked. I nodded softly.

"Can you produce your patronus for me, like you did that one time in the hallway?" he asked. I frowned at this request.

"Why?"

"Just do it, Selwyn", he sighed, a small smile tugging on his lips. I got out my wand and swished it, mumbling the incantation.

Nothing.

I tried it over and over again, but nothing happened. I had done this a hundred times, why was it not working? Why had my black swan gone to sleep?

"The black clouds in your mind are blocking the happy memories. That's why you can't produce it", he said, gently wrapping his cold fingers around mine and pushing my wand down. I looked at him again and I felt a little crack in my heart. A little bit of pain.

I relaxed the tension in my body and it felt like I could finally breathe out that one breath I had been holding in for weeks. And then I did something I never expected to do.

I hugged Draco Malfoy.

It was a spur in the moment kind of thing, but I didn't feel like letting go. I just needed someone to hold me right now and it didn't even matter who it was.

So when he reluctantly wrapped his arm around me as well, I relaxed and let out a shaky breath.

"Hey, it's okay", Draco mumbled in my hair. I knew that he had a lot of troubles with showing affection, so this meant a lot to me. Him returning a hug without even liking me was something that earned my respect.

"I'm just scared", I said, my voice awfully shaky. I tried to concentrate on getting my breathing under control again. I had to regain composure.

"I know", Draco said. "But try not to be." I wasn't quite sure what he meant by that, but I felt as if he clearly knew what he meant. He understood.

"Do you think I can still get it back? The fire?" I asked.

"Of course you can. Just allow yourself to melt." I closed my eyes for a brief moment, repeating those words in my head over and over again. Just allow yourself to melt.

"Thank you", I said as I pulled away, dusting off my clothes. "I'm sorry for invading your personal space like that. I just needed a hug", I said, chuckling awkwardly.

He shrugged and leaned against the wall.

"So what are you going to do with Pucey?" he asked.

"What do you mean?" I frowned.

"Oh come on, fiery Eleanor would have never let him get away with it like that. She'd drag him through hell and back before pushing him down a flight of stairs and then reviving him just to be able to torture him some more", he chuckled. I laughed at the image. I could definitely see that happening.

"But you always turn so cold when you're hurt", he continued. "I know that because most often I am the cause of it. Why do you extinguish your fire?"

I shrugged, not knowing the answer. It was something I always did. I kept the acid in my vessels, letting it eat away at me slowly.

"I think you're at your best when you're fiery. Your presence is known, but people who invade it get burnt. But still you have this kind of warmth that attracts people."

It was quiet for a long, long time. I genuinely didn't know what to say. Draco was being so incredibly kind and I had never experienced it before. He told me exactly what I needed to hear and I didn't know how to respond.

"Malfoy, I genuinely appreciate this", I said. "I needed this and even though I didn't expect you to be the person to help, I am very grateful you did."

"It's fine, just don't tell anyone about it", he said. "Let's get this patrol over with." I nodded and pushed myself from the window sill. We had barely started our route, but for the first time I didn't feel awkward. I didn't dread it.

"Do you have black clouds?" I asked him.

"What do you mean?"

"You said that dark clouds caused me to fail producing my patronus. Do you have them too? Since you said that you're not happy." I knew it was a very personal question, but I genuinely wanted to know. I wanted to know why he could not be happy. I wanted to help him like he helped me.

"No", he said.

"So you can produce a patronus? What is it?" He looked annoyed again, frowning deeply.

"I don't want to discuss this with you, Selwyn", he grunted. He was right, I had no right to ask him such personal questions. I had answered him because I unconsciously wanted to, but he didn't have to.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked that", I said, rubbing my eyes. I just now realised how tired I was. Draco sighed.

"I don't have a patronus because I don't have memories that are pure happiness."

A lump formed in my throat as I heard that. I had always seen Draco as a heartless arsehole, and maybe he still was an arsehole, though clearly not heartless, I wouldn't wish that on anyone, to not have any happy memories.

"I'm sorry about that. I hope that'll change for you some day", I mumbled and I really meant it. He just shrugged and we continued our walk. I let my mind wander, going over our talk again.

There was only one thing on my to-do list. I was going to destroy Adrian Pucey.

"I need your help with one more thing", I said eventually.

"And what's that?"

"I want to ruin Adrian's life and I think you'd be a good help", I said, imagining many entertaining scenarios in my head. I had to get him on his knees without having any repercussions myself. I had to play this out carefully and very, very nastily.

"And what's in it for me?" Draco frowned.

"Oh please, Malfoy. You live for a good display of power. You're not going to let me have all the fun."

"I suppose you've got a point", he grinned. "I suggest starting by writing to his mum, she'd love to hear what her son is up to." That was a pretty terrific idea. If Adrian's mother heard that he had mistreated Eleanor Selwyn, daughter of one of the Sacred Twenty-Eight, he'd be done for.

Adrian would regret messing with me.