it had been a week and a half since tae had sent a text off to his entire network asking if they knew of any openings that he could possibly apply for- to be totally honest, he had forgot that he had even done it, losing hope after the first twenty-four hours.

but then, like a miracle, three dots turned an opportunity.

tae clicked the link which lead him directly to a job description page- one that laid out what he'd be do, what experience they hoped he'd bring, and lastly, where he'd be located.

the words "an island off greenland" slipped off his tongue, barely a whisper, as he made sure he was seeing that right. the population was less than his dorm in japan, less than his entire high school even, but, it was a stepping stone.

a really, small, tiny stepping stone.

he continued to read it over- assistant position, teaching orchestra meaning he'd get to work with a lot of aspiring string artists like himself. in a way, it sounded relaxing. his room and board was covered with employment and he'd stay within walking distance of campus. every piece that would have left him worried, was already laid out.

"what are you doing?" seokjin had snuck over the edge of the couch, holding his breath so that he could read everything that tae was.

the younger jumped, startled by his cousin's presence, "damn it jin!"

"what? you didn't hear me?" he plaid coy.

taehyung shut his laptop with a bang, narrowed eyes as he studied the figure in front of him, "did you need something?"

"yeah, what are you looking at?"

"jobs."

"what kind of jobs?" he was nosy, needing to know and he refused to leave until he had answers.

"just jobs." tae noted the way his cousin raised an eyebrow at that, "how much did you read?"

"all of it! you wouldn't really go to greenland would you?" jin tried to imagine how far away that was, any further than his couch already seemed daunting.

"i was thinking i'd at least apply. it would be a good start for me! a fresh start."

"when are you going to acknowledge that fresh starts don't always have to involve you leaving the country?" the older put on his best parent voice, tapping his finger against his chin like he had just come up with the most brilliant point.

taehyung rolled his eyes, "you know traveling has always fulfilled me. this would just be like an extended trip! besides, aren't you stick of waking up to me drooling on your couch every day?"

"not at all! if it was possible, i'd want to wake up to you drooling on my couch for the rest of my life." he sighed, "i don't think its a good idea for you to go; why do you even want to go?"

"what's here for me jin? hm?" the younger was visibly flustered and frustrated, imagining where he thought he'd be versus where he actually is. he felt like he was at the most pathetic crossroads, "i wanted to perform and play and be encased by culture but... i'm here. at home. being what? a maid! how pathetic is that?"

"i thought you liked jungkook?"

a lump formed in his throat yet, he wasn't sure why. something about the younger left him worn down and raw, a rebound relationship in a way that had gone left, "i think i could love jungkook and that's why i need to leave." it felt good to get those words off his chest to somebody else.

"love?" jin would have spit out his drink if he had one, "tae, that's a big word. are you sure you aren't just heavily infatuated with him?"

the younger shook his head, "i'm not dumb; i know the difference!" his eyes morphed to hearts as he thought about all the times together, the secret mornings, the shared cups of coffee as the sun set, the sips of whisky and the sneaky kisses, "he's like the most perfect person for me."

"how so?"

jin wasn't opposed to the idea of love. hell, he wans't even opposed to tae and jungkook in being in love- he'd of course support it. it was just that... love was a strong word. one wrapped up heavily in emotion and feelings, two things that tae felt heavier than the average person. although it was usually endearing, it could get toxic, negative, and somebody had to be the bad guy and point it out.

"he's a loving father, he's fun, incredibly talented, inquisitive of my emotions- he always shows up when i'm in a crisis." he remembered jungkook helping him smile through the bogum situation, picking him up when he had thought he hit rock bottom, "you don't understand! it happened so fast, even i don't really understand it." tae felt like a silly school age child going on about the person they were doodling on the front of their notebook.

"i guess i don't but, if you love him so much then why are you leaving him?" jin pointed back to the laptop where the application to teach in greenland sat unfinished.

"because sometimes love isn't enough."

both knew he didn't mean those words, too tied in hurt to see the bigger picture. too distanced from the person he craved to have a rational thought about what it would mean to leave him entirely.

jin just hoped he'd figure it out before hoping a plane to the other side of the world.