he said while looking into my eyes.

."

My jaw goes unhinged. I still can't process what just happened. I understand the words he is using but it doesn't make sense if it was from his mouth.

"What?" I asked.

What is he planning to do? Am i in a dangerous situation? I'm scared.

"W-what are you planning?" I said with terror, slowly getting up my chair, reaching for my crutch.

Contrary to what I thought, Chenle is still sitting there, now smiling. Painfully.

he muttered.

He leans his head back, taking a deep breath. He sighs with what sounds like defeat. Just as i was about to think what to do, Hrvy comes running with blood on his hands.

"Renjun is here, at the gate, wounded, Jisung is missing!" He shouted.

Chenle is wasting no time standing on his feet and running towards the house's entrance. Hrvy runs behind Chenle, leaving me behind. I begin to run as fast as i can with my crutch, gripping it firmly.

Just halfway there, i see Chenle and the rest of the boys in the living room. I rush to them. Renjun is on the couch. Blood coming from Renjun's abdomen. He whines in pain, lips as pale as marble statues.

"What happened?" I asked Haechan.

"We don't know either," Haechan answered while dragging me to sit on a stool.

"How did you guys find him?"

"I heard gunshots from the outside of the gate," he said, then continued, "I went to check on the security camera and saw Renjun practically choking on his own blood."

Chenle is busy treating the wound on Renjun's abdomen.

Chenle stitched up the wound on Renjun's abdomen. The poor boy is now laying on the sofa, sleeping. Chenle gave him some heroin to calm him down. There are many more illegal things they do that underage drinking and drugs taking are ordinary.

Haechan is sitting beside me, looking at footages from the city cameras to find clues about how Renjun got here and Jisung's whearabouts.

"Chenle, we should talk," i asked the boy that was about to leave the room.

He sighs.

Chenle said, leaving the room in a flash.

I grab my crutch and start walking to where Chenle was heading. My arms are tired.

I look over to see Chenle entering his room and slamming the door behind his back. For a minute i could hear nothing else except my heart thumping inside my chest.

Something clicked.

"Am i in his bad side now?" I whispered before fisting a handfull of my hair.

I'm gonna die.

I'm gonna die.

I'm gonna die.

I'm gonna die.

I'm gonna die.

I'm gonna die.

My knees weaken. I finally slump my body to the floor.

Is that it?

Is this the end of me?

My mind wanders to the first time i open my eyes in this house. I can still feel the chilling alcohol that Chenle doused on me that day.

Ah.

How could i forget the first time i killed a man. Was it when we were going to the 127 Base?

I let out a silent cry. Tears rushing to meet my chin through the pallor of my face.

My eyes fall to the sight of my hands. I remember my first shooting lesson.

"Urk," i almost puked.

The blood stench clouded my mind. I can't believe that i was euphoric back then. I can't believe how i was in craze after seeing blood and flesh rain the air.

What am i doing here?

This life isn't for me-

Chenle asked with undeniable shock.

I gaze up at him with my eyes pooling to the brim.

He quickly hunch down.

Chenle bombarded me with question.

Fear strucked his façade.

"I'm sorry, please spare my life," i let out almost inaudible mumble.

Fear.

I'm scared.

Help me.

Please.

Someone help me.

I fucked up.

Chenle is on his knees. He reach to grab my shoulders to which i duck from.

"I'm sorry, i must've did something wrong, please spare my life," i whispered loud enough for him to hear me.

Chenle hugs me without asking. His hands are shaking. I could almost hear him seethe.

Chenle said.

His breath is unsteady.

The boy lost controll of his emotions. He sobs into the tiny frame of the girl. The girl is not in any better of a state.

Chenle was not one to say anything about his emotions. But he chose to pour it out in front of the girl he yearn love to.

Xiao Yue finally knows.

She finally realized that his confession were genuine. She finally succumbs into his grasp. Holding him close as she sobs into the crook of his neck.

Xiao Yue realized that she had taken a liking to the boy back then but she thought that the feeling was completely extinguished after he toyed with her feelings. But why can't she stop thinking about him? The cold side of him. The way he fights to live. The way he chuckled with such carelessness. The way his cheeks blushed when she teased him.

There is nothing to doubt again.

"I love you too, Chenle."

Chenle pulls himself from the hug in shock.

"I love you too."