《incomprehensible thoughts》coming to a close
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(im sorry if there are any spelling or grammar errors, but i honestly dont have the energy to fix them. im writing this because i got inspiration from something that happened with a friend, and if they could actually do this, then i can write it to someone who'll never see it. it means a lot to me. anyway, im kinda sad rn, so yeah, enjoy)
hi
i dont miss you
i dont want you
okay, i lied
i wish you were here for me
to finally say goodbye to
i want to know
i want to feel
i want to finally understand
i want closure
i want so many things from you
things ill never get
should i hate you?
yes.
i absolutely should.
you fucked me up
you made me attached to you
you made me believe you'd stay
you made me think you wanted me
loved me
but did you stay
did you want me?
did you ever love me?
i don't know.
i wish i had answers.
i want to hate you
for breaking me
but i cant.
just cant.
i want to wish you were happy
but can i do that either?
no
no i cant.
i do not love you anymore
i dont want to love you
but for once in your goddamn life
why did you have to lie?
run away?
why must you leave me to hurt?
to die inside?
to wish i could die outside?
i am now empty
completely
utterly
empty.
empty of tears
empty of hate
empty of sadness
empty of happiness
empty of smiles
empty of answers
but full of memories
full of guilt
full of regret
full of confusion
full of questions
full of broken shards of glass
twisting their way in and out of my insides.
you were bullshit
all you did
all you said
was bullshit.
but all i want from you now
is answers.
i have so many whys
so many hows
so many whens, whats, ifs
and some whos
who were you?
who are you?
who was he?
who was I?
who am I?
pointless questions
empty questions
broken promises,
broken words.
fuck you
i wish i could want you to burn
but
with this, i say
i say goodbye
goodbye to you,
but not to your memory
your pain.
goodbye to the love i once had,
but not to the faint wishes i still hold
goodbye to your nothing
your everything
your something.
you're something
you were something
we were
but not anymore
so with this i say
looney-toons-style
that's all folks
we're coming to a close
for the night.
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