o. writing help

BODY LANGUAGE

to help you

identify a

character's

body language

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( note that people who are high self monitors will notice these behaviors more often and can adapt to different conversations more than those who are low self monitors, who may not realize that they are reacting inappropriately in a situation. )

second note that we only remember a fraction of dialogue and conversation, what sticks in our mind is how a person made us feel during the conversation

women, parents, good teachers, and actors are more sensitive to gestures and expressions and noticing subconscious behaviors in others.

please note that some of this may not apply to everyone, keep in mind where these social situations could change for your neurodivergent, mentally ill, and disabled characters

under the cut, i go through , , , and .

NON-VERBAL INTERACTIONS AND GESTURES!

listen, my guy, you can't forget the other interactions in a conversation that aren't dialogue because it all connects to the point that the non-verbal part of a conversation is in all interactions and completely unavoidable

(1) these are the little noises people make in between words that they don't realize they're making. also the gestures to emphasize an argument or help move along the dialogue.

(2) NVB can be used to repeat what has been said verbally ( hand gestures about directions or showing visually what happened - think of children telling a story, the hands will draw what's happening even if exaggerated ).

(3) NVB can also substitute what's said verbally ( using a gesture that has a meaning, sighing or making some kind of noise to convey frustration or another emotion )

(4) there's also regulation, when you're done speaking you can gesture to the other to speak or tell someone goodbye or hello. also when someone wants to leave a conversation, NVB will show that too with touching things around them, fidgeting with their things, leaning forward if they are in a chair like they are about to stand.

(5) changing in pitch, pauses, fidgeting, messing with clothing, having to move around, hand gestures, people aren't just standing still all the time, and the gestures do have a meaning - they can complement the words or tear them down all together

(6) if someone is telling a lie, they're hand movements and body language may not match their words, this also happens when someone is thinking of what to say. they can drag out their vowels and fix their clothing, or their hand gestures won't add to the dialogue. an example of that would be shaking their head when they mean to say 'yes'.

(7) when someone's words contradict their gestures and expressions, this means their thoughts aren't connected and they are thinking them up on the spot. they will avoid eye contact to focus not on the conversation

(8) if someone is more comfortable in a conversation, their movements won't show the anxiety that fidgeting creates, it's more open: greater and quicker gestures. Also, people who are closer will be able to synchronize their NVB without any thought - walking in the same pattern, quickly understanding what someone means through their gestures, expressions, or pauses without explanation

(9) if a conversation is uncomfortable, it'll

be more difficult to understand a person and it'll be harder to engage, more gestures showing that someone wants to leave the conversation

many human gestures are innate. when we convey an emotion through our expressions or with our hands, they will be in every human no matter if they are blind.

an example of this is seen in the expressions we make when we are sad, angry, or disgusted. ( this is the case as these expressions do add to our survival, for instance, if something tastes disgusting, we all make around the same face after eating it, that's to share that you ate something bad and no one else should eat it. )

a lot is still learned, however, especially if the gesture is tied to the society.

HOW WE USE SPACE!

how we use and take up space is a matter of status in society

people with a higher status will stand closer, taking up space and claiming it as their own. people with less status will try keep a further distance.

( ONE IN A CONVERSATION! )

in private conversations: 0 - 12′' inches apart

casual: a foot to four feet

conversational: 4 - 12 feet

(1) men move away from men during a conversation together

(2) women move closer to women during conversation

(3) men move closer to women and women move away from men in a conversation

(4) when people approach others in a conversation

two men talking: women and men will walk around them

(5) two women talking: all people will go through them

(6) men and woman talking: men will go through them and women go around

(7) women's space is usually violated by men and women alike, and saying something, does give them more status, however, as this is an accepted aspect of interaction, the action won't always be taken well, but there is status to gain

(8) people who are close relationship wise, will stand closer to each other

(9) people who are more assertive will take up more space and be more willing to look down on another for intimidation to portray that they have more status.

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE!

(1) we do move closer to people that look nice and are more willing to speak to those who are wearing nice clothing

(2) however, clothing can send mixed messages if someone wants to be looked at or not

wearing heels when you can't walk in them, wanting to be looked at but going about it the wrong way

(3) people are more willing to be assertive when they are dressed nice

GREETINGS!

( this happens less than a second )

(1) the eyebrows will go up and down when we see someone we know. this isn't processed, but you can see it emphasized sometimes on purpose.

(2) do you ever greet friends with funny faces, with eyebrows raised?

(3) head is raised and lowered

(4) men will pull up their pants. people will fix their hair and clothing

(5) turning to face them fully

SAYING GOODBYE!

( wanting the conversation to be over )

(1) people will move away and begin to fidget

(2) people will begin dragging their vowels and repeat what they have been saying

(3) they will look away and turn their attention to something else, even if for a moment

(4) for someone else to speak: leaning in, gesture with hands to the other person ( even subtly ), raising voice, giving them eye contact, raising eyebrows

(5) maintain a conversation: to hold a turn of the conversation, people will move away from the other person, continue making motions with their hands, and avoid eye contact

MORE ON EYE CONTACT!

(1) we use eye contact to see if someone is listening or to give a conversation to another.

(2) how long you hold the eye contact can show which one is present

(3) you tend to stare more at the people you hate or love

(4) on pupils, when we are attracted to something, more than appearance wise. our pupils dilate when we are interested in something, talking about something we love to do, your pupils will dilate.

(5) this isn't something we process doing, but we do notice it in others without realizing it

we also find dilated pupils to make people more attractive as people look interested. dark lighting makes people look more attractive through this.

HOW TO KNOW IF SOMEONE IS LYING!

(1) to tell if someone is lying, what someone must pay attention to is the voice more than gestures or facial expressions

(2) the voice will convey guilt and emotion. people will tend to stutter more and lose control of their voice and tone. if you want to tell if someone is lying, listening to anything else but the tone will throw you off.

(3) there will be more time to create a story and retell their version. when telling a lie, the person may only focus on remembering their own thoughts, causing little emotion and gestures, which make the lie seem more fake than it could be

(4) to make a lie more believable, there must be movement, and more the movements are planned, but not robotic, the better the lie.

(5) also, the better someone gets at lying, the more comfortable they are with using hand gestures

high self monitors are better liars as they are able to notice their behavior more quickly, and while low self monitors have a hard time adapting to a different conversations, they are more honest as their behavior doesn't shift between the situations they are in.

( from tumblr )

thank you for all the sweet

comments you guys give!

hope this helped