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There are few instances in everyone's life that are just f*cked up, no other way to explain those moments other than expressing regrets towards them from time to time, some people prevail those moments while others keep them somewhere in their hearts, closed off from world and themselves, ignoring them to the extent of not thinking about it at all, locking them in the deepest part of their memories cause even when they hurt, it is still a part of them.

My first regret came when I left someone important for the first-ever time to run, run away from my problems rather than fighting for the one who was willing to fight the world for me, not realising that, that one mistake will worth me tons of heartbreaks and betrayals afterwards.

I wasn't ready for what I had to endure, I should've left everyone behind for him, and even if I did perpetrate one mistake I shouldn't have repeated it, not when circumstances led me to this.

I saved numerous at the expense of my sanity, and even if I regret everything in my life at one moment I won't regret the smile that crowned on those peoples faces after they shagged in relief upon catching a glimpse of me. And that's what kept me going, even when everything in my life was falling apart, they were getting a future over it.

The dripping sound and its echoes were penetrating through my overly sensitive hearing, you get that advantage when your senses are numb, I felt my body numb enough to not feel anything but conscious enough to know I'm alive and awake, silently listening for any kind of movement or creak around me other than the water dripping, I couldn't feel the temperature when my body was buzzing in numbness, I couldn't feel pain in my calf which I should be feeling, nor could I hear anyone.

"Baby?" The voice was deep over the dripping noise, echoing in the closed space, seeking my attention like a solicitor, I tried opening my eyes only to be met with disappointment when my eyelids didn't even budge, forcing my remaining strength to the surface I opened them with difficulty, meeting with more darkness instead of the light I perceived, my sight blurry and hazy, letting me see close to nothing, I was feeling like someone was trying to hedgehog my head when I struggled to take in my surrounding.

Lifting my head with an involuntary whimper leaving through my lips I met with his face, those familiar brown eyes sinking into my skin, prickling my skin with the need of touch, tempting my heart to beat faster, hitching my calm and slowed breathing, I almost sagged in relief, my lips moving to form a single word as I felt my eyes brimming with unushed tears at his sight, so deep in hope that I failed to notice the absence golden glistens in his eyes.

"X-Xavier?" My voice breaking in distress, lips tremoring and shivering in helplessness while his turned into a small smile as a single tear drifted down my cheek.

Everything happened so fast, my face jerked right harshly with hair hoisting in different directions when his hand made contact with my cheek, stinging pain coursing through my body, my throat constricting at the slap for my mind to wrap the situation around, before I could contemplate what was happening or prepare myself for anything before my face was grabbed harshly to turn around.

My eyes finally focusing clearly on the person who was sitting in front of me, this time grey eyes meeting my hazel-green ones, instant hatred spreading through my chest as he smirked at me.

"Arcadius," I whispered causing his grip to loosen on my face, I could feel blood trickling on my lips from the cut his slap caused, he tsked, casually wiping the blood away from my lips while I continued staring at him under my hooded eyes, finally taking in the slimy basement he was keeping me in, my hands and legs were tied to the chair behind me.

"After waiting for two years, don't you think I at least deserve to be called by my name rather than someone else's?" He asked grimly and I silently continued to stare at him.

"I don't like that eyes of yours, I liked them blue." He sneered disgustfully, looking at my pupils in distaste, having a problem in accepting me as anything other than what he remembered, me using the blue contacts while staying with him might have left an impression on him.

I couldn't accumulate enough strength to retort to him even when I tried, he must have noticed my crusade to talk rather than fishing on finding obstructions in me when he replied nonchalantly.

"Don't bother to move much, I drugged you," His heavy Italian accent cutting through the air, making me even more furious when he confirmed my intuitions of drugging me, I silently glared at him, my eyes dropping shut in between, fatigue was flushing over my body like clouds.

Wetting my chapped lips with difficulty I hazily focused on him, "f*ck you," my voice too weak to even sound like a curse but the echo in the large basement did a pretty decent job, my insults to him did nothing whatsoever other than chiming his attention.

"Don't worry, you did and you would," he smiled mockingly, his gaze swirling over my tied body unhurriedly, devouring every single curve of my body with intricacy, remembering and memorising every change in my body with exquisiteness before settling It on my face, wetting his plump lips and extending his fingers towards my face, making me slightly turn my face away.

His fingers instead of my face yanked my hair in tight clutch when I rejected his touch, his eyes almost black with anger when he forcefully made me face him, his lips twitching in irritation of not getting what he wanted, he wanted my absolute and total submission which he wasn't getting any time soon, I whimpered against our slightly brushing lips from the pain increasing in my skull, bruises on my body isn't helping me at all.

"I'm disappointed Tesoro," his voice was a mixture of growl and roar, heavy hot breath flowing on my lips sending shivers of anguish and fear down my spine, I stared into his eyes voidly, my mind running thousands miles per sec, scenarios, my condition, percentage of my escape, him getting caught, his lips on mine, my body in his, all the subconscious thoughts bombarding me at once but one bouncing all over the others.

I knew exactly what he was implying, what he was disappointed for and with whom he was disappointed, it was me.

A deriding chuckle slipped past my busted lips, gaining a fade perplexed look from him when he harshly craned my neck to him, his lips just mere centimetres away from mine, once the chuckle died, it left a permanent disparaging smile in its place, "you deserved it," my words causing his grip to tighten even more on my hair, already knowing that he was going to lose it I prepared myself.

And he did just what I thought he would, he snapped, slapping me right across the face yet again, baring me almost unconscious before I felt him injecting me with another dose of narcotics in my thigh roughly, my eyes slowly dripping close on their own.

Before I could entirely slip into the darkness I heard him whispering the last words. "I'll have you,"

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Small fingers passed through my brunette hair as I slept carelessly in her lap, her soft lips closing on my forehead in hope of showing her feelings making me hide my face in her stomach.

I opened my eyes to met with her dark brown ones, platinum blonde hair flowing in the air, a small smile contouring her freckled face, and I did what I had to, softly placing my hand on her cheek as she leaned into my touch, hitching my breath by looking so innocent.

She was part of my f*cked up life.

I gasped as the chilled cold water trailed down my neck after shadowing down my face, my eyes fluttering open to see Arcadius standing in front of me, with a glass over my head that he just downed it on me.

I tried to move my hands but my crusades were withheld by the echoing clanking sounds, I looked down to see myself plummeted on the cold floor of the basement, wrists and legs tied with iron chains that were attached to the wall behind me.

"Sole bambino, (sunshine baby)," I deliberately lifted my gaze to see him smiling, exhaling heavily he crouched down to my level, gently tucking the wet hair strand that was sticking on my neck, I stopped myself from jerking away in case he decided to inject me again due to irritation, he seemed content with me obliging to his needs.

In sync the gate to the basement opened, curtailing his touch as he stood up, my eyes moved from him to the idiot who was nonsensical enough to interrupt him. Rafael, his second in command stepped inside, his eyes shining in conquest upon meeting mine, the cut straggling along his jaw looking even grimmer than before.

"Capo," he affirmed, nodding his head towards Arcadius before veering around his attention on me.

"Regina," Rafael nodded his head at me in respect, his hand subconsciously touching his jaw as his eyebrow twitched, I turned my head away from the two men in the room before they get a glimpse of smug on my face at his reaction, it would have seemed like I was fearfully trudging away from them when I was trying hard to decipher what they were talking about.

"They're looking for her," Rafael stated and a small smile crowned my face at the news, it was obvious that they were looking for me when I was important for taming Arcadius down.

Arcadia's must have noticed my expressions when he yet again crouched down to my level, the sound of the door closing echoing through the basement as we were finally left alone, his closeness made me stagger back as he slithered closer, his hot breath flowing on my cheek making me shudder in disgust, I felt his fingers brushing along my thigh, inching closer under the black sundress that I woke up in, I felt like scratching my body and throwing up just by the fact that he changed my clothes after patching my leg up, I didn't need to think twice to know it was him, he never liked anyone claiming me other than him.

I panicked when his fingers continued under my sundress up further, lashing out at him in fear, "What do you want from me?!", his hand stopped near the seam of my panties, lining the trace of my inner thighs casually, sending shivers down my spine, I stared at him fiercely when from inside I was dreading his further actions, he could easily take advantage of me right now and I wouldn't able to do anything about it even if I wanted to, he purposely made me vulnerable so I needed to play smart, he is always one step ahead of everyone and if I wanted to save my dignity I needed to use the little bit of emotions he feels towards me otherwise I'm done for.

he seems to find my little blowup amusing as he slowly extracted his hand from under my sundress making me sigh inwardly in relief, I never averted my gaze from him, my body alert of every single movement he made, his pinkie finger twitching in irritation but his face showed nothing other than a grim smile, no irritation just pure animosity, "Do you know how much I want to take you right now?-" his face lurking closer until our lips were slightly grazing each other, "right here?-" his hand softly settling on my bruised cheek, unhurriedly trailing down to the nape of my neck, spreading goosebumps all over my body, "you have no idea how I'm holding myself back from taking you, knowing exactly the numbers of f*ckers you slept with after me, you f*cking whore, how you got engaged to one of them?" He must have been enjoying my body shivering from his touch, thinking it was from need when it was because of pure hatred.

"The things I will do to you, you'll writhe underneath me just like you used to, scream my name until every f*cker knows you belong to me, you'll be my baby girl just like you used to be, after you give me two things, yourself and my kingdom." He craned my neck to his lips, slightly grazing it with his teeth and lips, sucking and biting until he had successfully marked another bruise on my already purple skin, I shuddered, trying to pry off his hands but his grip tightened in return, his face moving in front of mine yet again, harshly grasping my lower lip in his teeth, tugging it and leaving when a trail of blood was flowing down, the taste of my own blood in my mouth made me want to throw up but he seemed fascinated by it, my tear that smudged the cut made it sting.

"A girl like you should wear warning," he murmured, eyeing my lips with satisfaction in his eyes, as the blood trickled down to my chin, my eyes stuck on the serpentine expression swirling in his grey ones, I knew he was unaware of his emotions, he wasn't stable enough to care about anyone rather than himself.

My energy was slipping away from the fatigue as the pain continued increasing in my calf, "The next time I walk through that doors,—I expect something from you, my love, and it would give me tremendous pleasure if you tell me what I want to hear," he whispered, psychotically eyeing the blood on my lips, his eyes glinting with the weird pleasure he was feeling, my ragged exhale pulled him out of his attention, he looked like he just noticed his bone-crushing grip on my face and reluctantly left it, creating distance between us, and standing up.

"Try not to faint, it's tempting to see you vulnerable and it irks me to do something," he stated like he wasn't ordering and stating that he wanted to do something bad, diverting my gaze away from him I waited for him to get out, a relieved breath left my lips when the door closed, one that I didn't know I was holding until now.

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I was deep into my thoughts, remembering a certain someone that I had successfully buried deep down in my memory lane, my head limply plopped on the wall as I recalled her small hands caressing up my arms, her sweet scent enveloping both of us in a dream, away from the cruel world she was trapped in.

My memories were cut short as the sound of heavy metal door opening reached my ear, knowing exactly who entered I didn't even bother to lift my head and acknowledge his gruesome presence, his face alone disgusted me to the core, if I could get my hands on him I would gouge his eyes out before shoving them so far up his ass that he would choke on them, I specifically wanted to tear those limbs of his which he used to taint so many innocent lives, I would give my life in a heartbeat if it means I get to take his.

"Ha portato il tuo risotto preferito per te (Bought your favourite Risotto for you,)" his thick Italian accent rushed through the deadly silent basement, the same one that was enough to drop ladies panties, I huffed, gradually tilting my head to look at him.

"I'ho odiato. (I hated it.)," I replied, my pronunciation a little off than his, but still, he was used to it, he was so delusional that he believed in every single lie I told him, to the extent of bringing my 'supposedly favourite dish' to me.

He smiled softly, crouching down in front of me, tying my hair up with a help of the band, his touch so much gentler than before, this is what I have about him, he's so f*cking bipolar, at one moment he is trying to kill me and the second he is tying my hair back for my comfort, picking up the spoon he scooped some of the risotto before bringing it to my lips.

"Open up," I glared at him, eyeing him with distaste, the drug was fading from my system as time went by, my upper lip was twitching in irritation to his thoughtful sham, he doesn't care. He is one manipulating jerk, letting the anger take the best of me I brought my chain clad hand up and pushed the plate out of his hand, breaking it into millions of pieces onto the floor beside us, food scattering around as the chains continued clanking in the afterwards silence, my chest heaving in aggression to see him focusing on the shattered pieces.

He smirked, silently turning his head to be before his expression turned into a fierce one, his move catching me off guard as he wrapped his fingers around my neck in a choke, cutting off my air supply entirely and completely, air whooshed out of my lungs as he slammed me into the hard concrete floor, hovering over me like a deadly storm, trapping me underneath him with his legs on either side of my torso, his convoys dangling out of his shirt, one of it specifically standing out of them, chain dangling with a ring, an engagement ring to be precise.

"You have the audacity to act like this after cheating on me you whore!?" He growled, knocking my head on the floor yet again making black dots cloud my vision before his face came back into view, I gasped against him in hope of breathing, my consciousness was slipping away but his words were reverberating through the basement, forcing me to listen to every last bit of it.

"I gave you everything!! I gave myself to you and what did you do?! You betrayed me!!" He snarled, his voice so damned that I felt like I was going to die listening to him, This was the end. The rims of his eyes were bloodshot and his grey eyes had turned the deepest shade of black, I was wheezing and choking for air but he seemed to be enjoying letting me die slowly in his hands.

"I grieved for the love of my life!! I grieved for you for a whole f*cking year!!" His hoarse and pained voice provoked me to retort, gasping I impossibly wheezed out as a tear slipped down from my lashes, a pernicious smirk somehow forming on my face.

"L-Love?" I scoffed, my message clear, I never loved him, I could never love him, he wasn't worthy enough to be loved, he deserved every bit of hatred from me and thousands of others whose lives he destroyed, what he didn't deserve was to be cared for, to be loved, to be smiled at, and I made sure to break him in every worst way possible, just as he did to those innocent people, I took his heart only to shred it in pieces and return it to him if he wasn't monster enough before, he was now.

And he was directing his hatred towards me, ready to break and degrade every bit of me in return, to make me his.

My taunts brought up another unexpected response from him when he peeled his hand from my neck, air rushing through my windpipe at once as he pulled himself from upon me, compulsing revulsed though me, as I rolled on my hands, clanking of the chains intensifying beside me, gasping and choking on air at once, taking in as much air as I could, vulnerably losing my strength in front of him, giving him the satisfaction of seeing me in desperation.