it's new year's eve, there's a party happening tonight. around 10 pm I believe.

right now, it's about 7 and I'm in the library, doing a project, that's due at the end of break.

the art project and lewis were supposed to do, it together. but he hasn't helped. at all.

he always talked about making plans to do the project with me, but never actually went through with them. and the one time he did all he did was go on his phone while I did everything.

I know whenever I'm done with the project lewis will just take credit for it, I'm not entirely stupid. he's going to completely take all the credit and the teacher will believe him. the art teacher loves him.

I wouldn't be surprised if she was in love with him. she doesn't try to hide it. maybe she doesn't notice, or she just doesn't care if anyone notices.

considering this project is in art, I care even more than I would if the project was in any other subject. I don't hate art. I'm just not any good at it. that's what I don't like.

but theoretically, even if this project was on another subject, I still have a right to be upset. I might be overreacting about this, but I'm not letting another boy walk over me like I'm a platform of dirt.

I may deserve it, it may be well justified. so call me selfish, but I don't want it. I don't need it.

but here I am, stuck in a library at 7 pm on new year's eve doing it all alone.

it's fucking excruciating.

my hand is cramping up from all the drawing, my face feels heavy and I can feel my eyes slowly shutting. and my water bottle is empty.

I shut my eyes and lay my head down on the desk. I don't want to get up and refill it. but I'm fucking thirsty. I hate contemplating.

"Blair?" I take in a breath and slowly open my eyes and lookup. Leo is standing in front of me on the other side of the desk. he's looking right at me with his eyebrows furrowed "what are you doing?"

I stare at him dead in the eyes for a second and then lean back up, "art."

he looks down at the drawing and then looks back at me "it's winter break."

"what does that have to do with anything?" I ask him, confused. so what if I'm on break?

"it doesn't" he shakes his head slowly "it's just, it's art."

"exactly" I state.

his eyebrows furrow "you don't like art." I shake my head no and lean up in my chair "may I ask why?" I put my hands on my lap "I'm not good at it."

he pulls the chair across from me out and moves to sit in it. he's sitting right in front of me now staring right at me. "you don't like art? or you aren't good at it?" he asks.

"both," I answer back and put my hands back onto the table.

he leans back into the chair "I'm confused." I take my pencil into my hand "why are you confused?"

he takes in a breath and puts his hands on the table, beside mine. I don't think he notices. but I sure do. "you hate art, just for the reason that you aren't good at it?."

I nod "you are correct."

his eyebrows furrow, I move my hands over to the table to grab something but while doing so, I feel my hands go over his. he looks down at our hands, and I quickly pull away. "I'll help you." he looks back up at me and grabs the pencil from my hand.

I shake my head "you don't need-" he cuts me off "I'm helping you." he nods his head "what do I need to do?"

I sigh and grab my notebook off the table "here are my notes." I open it to the page the notes are on and hand it over to him. he puts the pencil down and grabs the notebook with both of his hands.

he's reading the notes over, his face is emotionless. he takes about 30 seconds to read one page and then he's onto another. while in the middle of reading it he looks up at me "this states you're supposed to do it in partners."

I nod "you are."

he holds up the notebook "you don't have a partner?"

I shrug "I do."

"So where are they?" he asks, still holding up the notebook.

"the moon." I look at him and shake my head. "how would I know?"

his eyes widen "so you're doing it all alone?"

I nod slowly "you are correct yet again."

he nods his head and stares at me for a second.

he smiles and then sets the notebook down in front of him and picks up the pen "alright, let's start." he pauses "I'll draw."

I nod my head and slightly smile "okay, I'll do the research."

Leo keeps tapping his pencil against the table. it's getting quite annoying, but I ignore it. I just keep staring at my computer screen.

then there's another tap.

I look up at Leo and stare right at him, he looks up from the paper. still tapping the pencil.

I quickly look away and state back down at my computer "I'm finished with the drawing." Leo says.

I look up at him once again and he hands me the paper. my jaw almost drops when I see it. holy shit. I look away from the paper and look at Leo in the eyes "Leo this is good."

his eyebrows furrow "are you lying" he asks but it's more of a statement than a question. I nod quickly "it's amazing Leo." I look into his eyes. his eyebrows are still furrowed, but now he has a slight smile on his face. "you don't take art" I ask, but it's more of a statement than a question.

"I do not," he says quietly, still staring at me.

"you should." I take in a breath, I force myself to stare at my computer and look through more articles, even though I'm practically finished with the research.

fuck I need a pencil. I look around the table and see the pencil beside Leo's hand "can you pass me the pencil please?" he looks up at me and I point down to his hand. he nods and takes the pencil in hand.

he puts his hand out to hand it to me and I go to grab it, but at the last second, he quickly pulls away. I take in a breath "seriously?" I lean over and try to grab it, but he pulls away once again. "you're so annoying."

he smiles to himself, this isn't funny. "annoyingly hot."

what the fuck. "that isn't funny." I stare straight at him.

"it's true." he's still smiling.

I take in a breath and quickly lean over the table and grab the pencil from his hand." it's absolutely not." I state.

"It absolutely is." his smile grows even wider. he completely disregards the fact that I took the pencil back.

I look down at the computer and type something in "you are so full of yourself."

I'm almost done with the project, I just have to take a couple more jot notes and then that's it. I look up the last article and while reading through it I glance up at Leo. who's already staring at me. very intensely might I say?

my eyes widen and I lift my head to get a better look "Leo?" I ask. he's still staring. oh god. "mhm?" he mumbles.

"Why are you staring at me like a killer clown?" I shake my head slowly "it's kind of terrifying."

he furrows his eyebrows and quickly looks away without another word. I shake my head and look back at the computer.

after a couple of minutes, maybe 4 or he says something "Blair" he whispers. "Blair" another one. "Blair-" I cut him off and let out a breath "yes?"

"do you want to go somewhere?" he asks, hopefully.

"where would somewhere be?" I ask slowly. "the beach." he says.

I raise my eyebrows "are you being serious?" I pause "it's winter."

"We have jackets." he says calmly. "you're being serious?" I ask "and even if you are, there's that party."

"We can skip it." he lets out a breath.

"it's new year's eve." I say slowly, so he'll understand. "what does that have to do with anything?"

"never mind." I shake my head. I close my laptop and my notebook "but sure, let's go."

he looks straight at me and I can see him trying to force away a smile "really?"

I nod, and stand up. "let's go." I grab my jacket off the chair and set it on and then pack up everything off the table. he finally lets out a smile and he helps me pack everything up into my bag.

once we're done and we're both ready with our jackets on, he talks. "let's go."

"Leo how fucking far is this beach." I ask. "the map says we're practically there." he says without glancing at me.

I turn and look at him "a map? what map?"

he holds up his phone "this map" he says as if it's obvious. "are you joking?" I ask but it's more of a statement than a question.

"why would I be joking?" he asks.

I look down at my feet and put my hands into my jacket pocket "have you ever been to this so-called beach?" I attempt to change the topic.

"I have not." he replies and looks down at his phone "and by the way, we've arrived." I look up at him and then look ahead. we're at a fucking river. a frozen river.

with wide eyes I turn to look at Leo, "this is a river." I shove my hands deeper into my pocket "not a beach."

he stares at me for a second and then looks all around us. there are trees all around us, they're all covered in snow and the river is right up ahead. we're currently standing on the rocks near it.

he looks down at his phone again and then back at me "it was supposed to be a beach." he says quietly. "Leo, it's fine." I start to walk further towards the river "come on." I look back at him and he slowly walks toward me.

I stop once I'm on the edge of where the river starts and lean down. I move the snow off the ground with my hand and look to find a rock. my hands are freezing.

I finally find one and lean back up,

turn to Leo and smile and then I turn back to the river and throw the rock on it. it doesn't break the ice, it simply just bounces off it. it looks good.

I carefully step on the ice with one foot, and then the other. "Blair, what are you doing?" Leo asks slowly, a slight change in his voice.

"come on here!" I whisper yell at him. completely disregarding what he said. "it's a frozen river!" he yells back.

I shush him and then speak up "it won't break, don't worry."

I can hear him let out a deep breath and then take on in "if I fall, I'm pulling you down with me."

I turn to him "how romantic." I tease through a smile.

he smiles back "what can I say? I'm a hopeless romantic." he looks at me and then carefully puts on foot on the ice. I can see he's still hesitant when he does, but completely disregards it and puts his other foot on it.

he walks over to me, making sure he's careful with each step. "so what do we do now?" he asks. his hands in his pocket.

I grab his hand out of his pocket and hold onto it. I start to slide on the ice, practically skating whilst still holding onto his hand. he quickly follows and I can feel his body shake. "what the fuck are you doing" he says, trying to hold back a small laugh.

I start to move around some more until I see a huge rock in the way. I try to stop in time but it doesn't work. fuck.

I start to stumble down and trip over. I start to grab Leo's arm without even realizing and I can feel him starting to tumble over as well. "oh god" he says.

while still holding onto his arm I turn myself over and now we're both facing each other whilst still trying not to fall over.

then his foot moves in front of mine, and I trip over it and fall, pulling him down with me. "oh no."

we're laying on the ice now, he's flat on the ice and I'm- oh my god. I'm on top of him. his head is back on the ice and his whole body is rigid. my legs are on top of his and my hands are on his chest.

his eyes open and he lifts his head and looks at me, we stare at each other for a few seconds before he starts to chuckle a bit, and I start to as well. then a couple of seconds later we're both laughing.

he's staring at me and I'm staring at him. we're both looking into each other's eyes while hysterically laughing. it's cold and snowing. his nose is insanely red and I'm sure mine is too.

it feels nice. I don't know another word to explain it. I wish I did. but that's all it is. nice.

our laughs start to fade away and his stare gets more intense by the second. I take in a deep breath and he swallows.

I can feel him inching closer, and I wouldn't be surprised if I was as well.

he moves his body up and leans his body weight into his elbows so he's propping himself up.

just at this movement his body and face get inches closer to mine. during this whole time, we haven't broken eye contact.

his head inches closer to mine and I can feel mine moving too. my head tilts to the side. He does too.

my breaths are insanely shaky, there's no doubt he hasn't noticed. my heart is rapidly beating in my chest and I wouldn't even be surprised if he heard it.

his eyes close and mine follow his. his breath is fanning over my lips. we're centimetres apart, yet none of us make a move.

we both stupidly sit there, holding each other, touching each other and our lips practically touching.

I can't tell what's happening, if he's going to do something or if I am.

I can feel myself slowly inching away, but then he takes in a deep breath and kisses me.

his lips move against mine, one of my hands moves to the nape of his neck and the other to his arm. while one of his hands goes to my waist over my jacket and his other hand goes to my cheek. God, his hands are cold.

he moves his head to the opposite side, I follow his lead and while doing this I move my hands to the back of his hair and start to twirl the hair there.

his nose is freezing cold which occasionally brushes over mine. but it doesn't truly matter.

we're both kissing each other slowly. there's no rush, no need to go any further. no worries at this moment.