《Absurd Haikus, an Autobiography》absurd haiku #14
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Our ordinary language flees, spurred to speed by laughter now and then.
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- In Serial2481 Chapters
Nine Star Hegemon Body Art
Long Chen, a crippled youth who cannot cultivate, is constantly targeted and bullied by his fellow noble heirs. After a particularly vicious beating, he wakes up and realizes a Pill Sovereign's soul has somehow merged with him, giving him some additional memories. Within those memories is the mysterious Nine Star Hegemon Body Art, a cultivation technique that even he can train in, but whose secrets and origin are still a mystery to him. Relying on his improved instincts as he finally begins to cultivate, he realizes a huge conspiracy is underfoot within the Phoenix Cry Empire; a conspiracy involving his father, members of the imperial family, and even the Emperor himself.In order to solve the mysteries around him, he must rely on his new alchemy techniques and the powerful but baffling Nine Star Hegemon Body Art. Countless enemies block him as he attempts to climb to the peak of the cultivation world.Fate destined him to be only a chess piece, but he would not bow to the will of the Heavens.
8 4884 - In Serial31 Chapters
Dreamer's Ten-Tea-Cle Café
Dreamer (and friends) open a little café on one of the quieter streets of Five Peaks. There they meet new friends, serve some tea to strangers, and tear open rifts in reality to solve mundane life problems. These are the stories of the Ten-Tea-Cle Café! [A Totally Official crossover between Love Crafted and: Azarinth Healer, Calamitous Bob, Vigor Mortis, Beneath the Dragoneye Moons, and many more!]
8 251 - In Serial136 Chapters
They are Smol
What if Humanity wasn't the apex predator among the stars? What if those true apex predators saw mankind and came to the same conclusion: Holy cow they're all adorable. The They are Smol series takes place in the near future after a disasterous first contact and the subesquent accidental invasion of Earth. Humanity is being uplifted for many reasons; they provide new culture and art on the galactic scene, sure. They can also look at scientific and social problems in a new light - absolutely. Mainly though, it's just to get them to do something productive with their lives and stop setting everything on fire- Humans, for their part, are oscillating between abject fear at the otherness of their new neighbors and the frustration that they keep placing things on the top shelf.
8 146 - In Serial20 Chapters
The Symphonia Of Erde (DISCONTINUED) (ARCHIVED)
Jakob Fowlhunter and Marie Budgerigar are bounty hunters who are always on the road; travelling from town to town, city to city, in search for wanted criminals that would fetch them some decent amount of gold in exchange for their life. A wicked job for wicked people as they say, but things weren't easy as it seems when THEY themselves are always on the run. Whether from vengeful barons or rivals with personal vendetta, there are always those who wanted them captured dead or alive (mostly dead though). But all of it would soon change when the two stumbled upon another curious duo; a former knight-wannabe adventurer and a travelling humanitarian doctor who isn't exactly a human. From there on, it's an all out adventure for four of them as they ventured across all of Erde; a world of wondrous magic, mystical beings, legendary warriors, kings of great and terrible, mighty dragons of all shapes and sizes and other stuff you would expect coming from a fantasy world archetype.
8 75 - In Serial38 Chapters
Round Two
Leo had lived life. It might not have been exciting, but he lived it. He yearned, gained, loved, and lost. And with his dying breath he dared to challenge whatever was watching over him. He had no regrets, and as he lay on his death bed, the fire continued to burn. The heavens were amused, so they decided to give him a chance. Leo was going in for round two.
8 119 - In Serial21 Chapters
JOHNNY X CEREAL (CTC FAN FIC)
As Johnny's eating his favorite cereal (Cinnamon Toast Crunch) he un-knowingly makes a wish and what happens from there can only be described as an ever lasting ecstasy, between a boy and his cereal.Chpt 3:"Wh-what are you doing!.." Johnny asked embarrassed but cautiously."I gotta loosen up a bit more." Chris whispered."No- don't!" Johnny stretched as he felt Chris start to lick his hole. Johnny tried desperately to claw at Chris, attempting to remove his head away from him, but he didn't budge.Now covering his mouth Johnny slowly adjusted to Chris's strong tongue which was now thrusting and flicking around In and around his hole."Mmffmm.." Johnny's moans were now muffled and slurred as he felt himself come closer to climaxation.
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