" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

"Seriously, why every single time that we find allies, they're either planning to backstab us or enemies in disguise..."

???: To think that you really were heroes...

Naofumi: Well, we've told you numerous times already, didn't we ?

???: That's true, you did tell us that... Well, this is nothing personal, but... For the sake of the world, die.

Naofumi: Why does it always come to this... ?

Heroes (minus 2): Really ?!! Are you serious ?!

Naofumi: *Annoyance intensifies*

Mirellia: Yes. Cal Mira island will soon become active. I would be most pleased if you heroes were to refine your skills there. Of course, this country shall provide for your transportation and lodging.

Naofumi: ... ? Active ?

"I suppose something like an 'event' of sort ?"

Mirellia: Exactly. Once every ten years, a phenomenon offering much experience occurs on this island. Many adventurers gather for it.

Naofumi: Hmm...

Motoyasu: How can you two not know this ?

Ren: Cal Mira island is well known for its institutions of rest and recuperation.

Itsuki: And the natural diversity is amazing.

"Yeah, I'm sooo very sorry. It's true that our first reflex while chased by an entire country for a crime we never committed in the first place should be to read some prospectus about a random island."

Naofumi: You've mastered the way of the sarcasm, haven't you ?

"I have a really great teacher."

Mirellia: A- Anyways, I'm glad that you heroes are so well-informed. I gathered you here today fro this very purpose. The holy weapons you heroes possess seem to mutually interfere, forcing you to do your levels separately. Is this not so ?

Mirellia: So in order to maximize training efficiency on Cal Mira island, I would like you all to exchange information here.

Naofumi: I see. Got it.

"Can't do us any bad, does it ?"

Mirellia: How about it, you three ?

Motoyasu: .. Well, as far as information goes...

Ren: There really isn't much...

'Where... Where did all that bravado just go ? They were all so boastful just a moment ago...'

Naofumi: 'rather than "there really isn't much", it seems like they're hiding something...'

'The fact is that we're used to it...'

Ren: While I sympathize with the two of you... Information is something to be collected by oneself. I don't have time to be peddling out to help people who will only be burdens.

"Oh... So that's the thing... You know what ? You took the words right out of my mouth just now..."

Naofumi: Are you saying that we've been negligent ?!

Mirellia: Please, heroes, now's not the time to fight; But it does not seem you understand. Let me speak more frankly. Other than Iwatani and Y/n, I believe you heroes are of insufficient strength.

Motoyasu: ... What ?

Ren: Our levels aren't that low...

Itsuki: We've done what we needed to do.

Mirellia: Then let me ask this. In the battle with the church of the three heroes, who among you was of the greatest use ? And in the wave preceding that that, not only were you three defeated, you could not even cooperate properly. And let not get started about how a weakened Staff hero was able to take you and all of your followers out with a single attack.

Mirellia: In order to face the ever-growing waves, the heroes must be united and strong. That is the purpose of exchanging information.

Itsuki: ... If that's the case... then Naofumi and Y/n should go first.

Naofumi: "Should" ? Why ?

Itsuki: How do I put this ? Your friends are unusually strong for their levels, so are you, and that creepy shield of yours.

Motoyasu: yeah ! Filo and Raphtalia are really, really strong.

"What can I say ? Kicking you in the nuts makes a lot of experience."

Motoyasu: Ngh...

Ren: I'd like to hear about this as well.

Naofumi: 'Goddamn... Do these fools think we're the ones hiding information from them ?'

'You DO realize you answered that question yourself already, right ? "I won't say anything, but you should..." Bunch of useless morons...'

Itsuki: I'll ask directly. Where did you two go to get that power ?

Naofumi/Y/n: ... What ?

Itsuki: I'll try again. I'm asking where you met some god and got that cheat power !

Naofumi: CHEAT ?!! That's not how this works !!

'Must not make the joke, must not make the joke, MUST RESIST THAT JOJOKE !!'

Itsuki: IS IT NOT ?! The offensive powers of your shield are way out of line for something legitimate !!

Motoyasu: yeah, yeah ! If we had that, we could be stronger, too !

Ren: true. And obviously, a shield is not optimal for firepower.

Itsuki: And let's not get started about how stupidly strong your magic is !

Motoyasu: A spell to stop time ? At your level, that's just straight up bullshit !!

"... I'm... Speechless. I'm speechless at how much of a thick-skull you all are. Your ego is so oversized that you simply cannot accept the fact that we're legitimately stronger than you..."

Motoyasu: I don't like what you're implying here.

"i'm not implying anything, I'm saying this as bluntly as possible. Try taking the problem from the opposite angle; the thing here is not that we're overpowered, it's simply you who are way too weak."

Motoyasu: You... Don't get all mighty just because you happened to get the strongest weapon !

"i'm sorry, I can't hear you bitching, there's some moron that keeps saying 'Shields and magic, they're pretty lame, right ?' around here."

Mirellia: Heroes, please.

Naofumi: All right. I'll tell you the truth. In exchange, you guys will teach me everything ! Even if it's in the help manual ! Or else I won't say anything !!

Mald: Understand ? Rishia ! It's inexcusable to think you can slack off just because lord Itsuki is in a meeting ! This all happens because you aren't diligent enough in your service to lord Itsuki !

Rishia: I... I'm sorry...

Raphtalia: Um... I'm not quite sure what happened, but... Isn't that enough ? Are you all right ?

Rishia: Ah ! I- I- I'm sorry...

Raphtalia: Umm... You're with the bow hero, correct ? I haven't gotten the chance to introduce myself... I'm with the Shield hero-

Mald: I know. Don't bother saying your name, I won't remember it.

Filo: Big sis Raphtalia ! What's taking master so long ?! Filo's hungry...

Mald: Tch ! A semi-human and a monster...

Naofumi: Something's wrong ?

"A bitch will disappear tonight..."

Mald: Rishia ! How long are you going to slack off ?! Get yourself together !

Rishia: Ehh... Ah !

Raphtalia: Wait !

Rishia: Ehh !

*Poomph*

Rishia: I- I'm sor... Ry...

Itsuki: Hey, you know this stuff, right ?

Motoyasu: Well, of course.

Ren: It's common sense.

Naofumi: Attack duplication... Item drops...

"Transferable skills... You guys figured this stuff out by yourselves ?"

Motoyasu: Didn't you try any other weapons at the blacksmith's shop ?

"Oh cool, a sword-*PSSSHHHHHHHHHH* YEOOOOWW !!"

"Mh."

Ren: Monsters drop items in every game.

Itsuki: Remember the hourglass of the Dragon's era ? It's because you don't read the manual properly that this happens.

'I think I hated it less when they were hunting us... The condescending tone make me want to fix them'

Itsuki: I guess I have no choice... I'll teach you how to determine the strength of items.

Naofumi: Really ?

Itsuki: Items in this world all have a rarity attached to them. So if you get weapons with high rarity...

Ren: What ? What are you saying ? Weapons get stronger with experience.

Motoyasu: Of course not ! It's all about refining weapons. What are you guys joking around for ?

"Huh."

Motoyasu: No need to spit such fanciful lies. You can fool them, but not me !!

Ren: How are you going to lie so calmly ?!

Itsuki: Well, the both of you are wrong ! Well ?! What does it say in the help manual ? What I said, right ?!

Naofumi: ... Nothing any of you guys said is here.

All: What ?!

"Not only that, but this attack duplication and item drops stuff..."

All: NO WAY !!

Mirellia: Heroes ! Please calm yourselves !

"Your majesty ? Is there anything you know about that matter ?"

Mirellia: Apologies, but as far as the Holy weapons go, I...

Naofumi: I see... 'It doesn't seem like they're lying... But there really is nothing in this help manual...'

"What if... What if that manual was different for each person, based on personal experiences... ? If all three of you used to play different kinds of games, that would explain why you all get different information. That would mean that no one is wrong as well..."

Motoyasu: Enough ! Now it's your turn ! Tell us the truth !

'... Like hell they'll believe us. It's written all over their faces that no matter what we say, they won't believe a single word from us...'

Naofumi: 'We may speak the truth, but they will only see lies. Which means...'

Mirellia: Although my knowledge about the way the holy weapons works, there is something that might be of use here. About the Holy Staff.

"What about it ?"

Just in case you guys forgot.)

Mirellia: Well, as you know, according to the legend of the first hero, the four cardinal weapons were once forged from that very staff, thousands of years ago...

Motoyasu: Yeah, so ?

Mirellia: It is just a theory, resulting of ancient research, but it would appear that the Holy Staff doesn't react the same way as the other weapons to their respective proximity.

"I think I understand... I did feel myself grow in power during those waves, and the fight against the church... When the other weapons were close..."

Mirellia: Exactly. According to those researches, not only is the Staff not affected by the interference between the other weapons, but it also reverse it. In short, when close to the Staff, the four Holy weapons empower each other, instead of interfering with each other.

"... Heh... Hehehehehehehehe... HAHAHAHAHAHAHA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA !!"

Itsuki: What is so funny now ?!

"W- Well, now you have at least a part of your answer on how we became stronger than you three. It's because you forced us to team up on our own !"

Ren: ... What ?

"You forced us to fight side-by-side all that time, and it made us stronger. We became so strong, exactly because you deemed us as weak to begin with."

Naofumi: Now you're bitching about that, but if you had let us tag along with you, maybe you wouldn't be so useless after all.

Itsuki: WHY YOU-

Soldier: EX- EXCUSE ME !!

Mirellia: What is it ?! We're in the middle of a meeting !

Soldier: Sorry... But... The heroes' allies are..

Bitch: Could you not idle around the castle ? And getting all chummy with a semi-human... The quality of lord Itsuki's followers has certainly dropped.

Mald: To think the criminal former princess would teeter her way here... Criminals should stay shut up in their cells, so why don't you ?

Bitch: WHAT ?! I AM LORD MOTOYASU'S RIGHT HAND !! WITHOUT ME, THE WORLD CANNOT BE SAVED !

Mald: HAH ! LORD ITSUKI AND HIS DEFENSE CORPS ARE ENOUGH FOR THAT !!

Rishia: Waah...

Raphtalia: C- Could you stop ?! It's not worth it !

Bitch: What's not worth it, is a semi-human and a monster wandering around the castle.

Mald: Speaking of which, the Shield and Staff heroes have no human followers, right... ?

Bitch: Of course ! Only semi-humans and monsters could love them. They're such pieces of

Raphtalia: ... You'd better... TAKE THAT BACK RIGHT NOW !!!

Raphtalia: Sorry... I made a ruckus...

Naofumi: Don't be. It's nice to see bitch every now and then after that punishment. Well, it's surprising to see you angry, since you're normally so gentle. And here I am trying to abandon rage...

Raphtalia: ... It doesn't seem the meeting went well.

Naofumi: yeah ! Not at all ! Those heroes and their followers live and die by their stereotypes ! They think that this world is absolutely identical to the games they've played. All their logic derives from that principle, and they're all weirdly arrogant about it...

Naofumi: Hm ? Where are Filo and Y/n ?

Raphtalia: Well, Filo is with Melty. They said that until we leave the castle, they'd sleep together every night...

Naofumi: Hah... I'd like to be that carefree. Man... But then, Y/n...

Raphtalia: He left a moment ago, saying that he needed to take care of something.

Mald: I swear, nothing beats taking a piss in the middle of the night. Even if the castle can be a little spooky at moment like thos-

*SLAM*

Mald: GAH !! ...Nothing, just a window... For a second, I almost thought...

Mald: W- Who's there ?! Show yourself !!

Mald: Eeeeee..

Mald: Haa... Haa... Haa... Haa... Who are-

Mald: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH- *Poomph*

" I think a few hours like that will teach you not to talk shit about Filo. Now to Bitch..."