I Went Back Home Cryin My Eyes Out When I Pulled Up In My Driveway I Tired Fixing My Hair And Make Up I Didn't Want Ayden And Azian See Me Like This I Was A Mess

In A Mirror I Literally Tried Smiling But When I Attempted To Smile Tears Began Falling Down My Eyes

My Heart Was Aching Of Unbearable Pain I Couldn't Help But To Ask Myself Continuously "What Did I Ever Do To Him To Deserve This"

We Been Together For Years,I Been His Biggest Fan And Supporter,I Gave Him All Of Me When I Say I Do...I Know We Was Going Through It But Did He Really Have To Cheat And Lie To Me

I Was Hurt Again

But It Was Different This Time Because Now We Have Two Beautiful Children And I Just Cant Leave Its Not That Easy

After I Finished Fixing Myself Up I Walked In And Soon As I Walked In

My Mother Was Holding Azain And Said "We Saw You Pulling Up On The Security Camera" As She Smiled

"Where's Ayden?"I Said

"He's Playing With That Dang On Puppy"My Mother Said As Ayden Ran Out The Kitchen

He Smiled At Me And Said "Mamaaa"

I Picked Him Up And As I Stared At The Child That I Made With The Man I Want To Spend My Whole Life With

I Was In Love We Was In Love When We Made Love And Than We Created Love When We Conceive Ayden

The Same With Azian How Can A Man That I Love Dearly So Much Hurt Me So Much And So Bad

What Did I Do Wrong I Know That Im Not The Easiest Person To Put Up With But Godammit I Got His Back He Ride I Ride,Everything He Needs I Am,I Would Lay My Life On The Line For Him Because I Love Him That Much

These Bitches Don't Love Him They Love Him For What He Can Do For Em No Will Ever Love Him That Way That I Do

I Put With His Shit Because I Love Him And I Thought He Loved Me Too

Thats Why Its Hurts So Bad,I Thought He Loved Me

When He Proposed To Me I Thought Of How Lucky I Was To Have A Man Love Me So Much

But During Our Marriage He Showed Me Very Little Love

What Happened To What We Use To Be

So Many Thoughts And Emotions Was Rushing Through Me I Couldnt Help But To Breakdown Crying

And Azian And Ayden Are Just Watching Me

"Baby Whats Wrong"My Mother Asked Me

"Im Sorry"I Apologize Because I Didn't Wanna Start Crying Infront My Children

My Mother Took Ayden Hand And Said"Lets Give Mommy A Minute To Her Self "

She Took Both Ayden And Azian Up To Their Play Room

I Walked In My Living And Just Continued Cryin

My Mother Walked In With A Box Of Kleenex And She Sat Next To Me And Said "Baby Whats The Matter"

"August Been Cheating"I Said Wiping My Eyes

"How Do You Know That"She Asked

"He Told Me,I Asked For The Truth And He Confessed To Me"I Said

"Oh My God"She Said

"Im So Stupid,I Was Trusting Him,Now I Can't Breathe It Hurts So Bad Ma"I Began Crying Again

She Held Me And Said "Im So Sorry To Hear That"

"What Am I Supposed To Do I Can't Stay And Can't Leave"I Cried

I Felt Like I Was Stuck And I Was Suffocating And I Couldn't Breathe All I Could Feel Was Pain

Permanent Pain

Why Should I Have To Feel Pain When I Did Nothing Wrong I Did Nothing Wrong But Loved Him

I Cook,I Clean,I Take Care Of Our Kids,I Deal With His Babymama,I Stay Up Late Waiting For Him To Come Home,I Make Love To Him,I Even Pray For Him

And This Is How He Repays Me By Being Unfaithful And A Liar

Nigga Done Had Me Stressed Out,Losing My Mind Now He Got Me Crying

And He Thinks When He Comes Home I'll Will Be Here After I Caught Him With That Bitch

No Its Not Going Down Like That

After I Assured My Mother I Was Okay She Left

I Went Upstairs And Start Packing My Shit I Didn't Know Where I Was Going,Or Where Me And My Children Will Sleep Tonight But I Know I Can't Spend Another Night Under This House Of Lies

I Can't Spend Another Minute Crying Over A Man Who Can't Stay Faithful To Me

I Have To Leave I Didn't Want Too But I Had Too

I Quickly Was Packing My Things I Was Trying Hurry Before August Gets Here

But I Was In My Bedroom Packing Suitcase He Walked In And Said "Where You Think You Goin?"

I Rolled My Eyes And Said "Im Leaving You"

"No The Fuck You Not!'He Said

"Did You Really Think After All The Shit You Said To Me I Would Stay You Know Me Better Than That Who Did You Think You Was Married To A Stupid Bitch?"I Asked

"You Not Goin No Where"He Said

"Im Not Takin Yo Shit No More You Wanna Fuck Bitches,Come Home At 3 In The Morning,Be The Man Well Nigga Now You The Man Cause Im Out"I Said

"What You Gon Do Without Money,Ima Have Ya Bank Account Frozen!"He Threatened Me

"Keep It I Don't Want A Dolla From You I Will Make It On My Own"I Said

"You Gon Really Take My Children From Me"He Asked

"The Last Thing I Wanted To Do Was To Break Our Family Up,I Never Wanted To Raise My Children Alone But Ima Do It If I Have Too"I Said

And He Lost It He Picked Up The Suitcase I Was Picking And He Threw It Against The Wall

"I Said You Not Goin No Where!"He Yelled

And I Stood Him In His Face And Said "And I Said Told You Im Not Takin Yo Shit No More"

He Pushed Me On The Bed And He Pinned To The Bed

"Let Me Go"I Said Kicking My Legs

"The Only Way You Leavin Up Outta Here Is In A Body Bag I'll Kill You Right Fuckin Now And After I'll Kill Myself"He Said He Was Furious

I Look The Devil In His Beautiful Dangerously Eyes And Said "You Already Killed Me,You Can't Kill What's Already Dead"As Tears Fell Out My Eyes

"Im Sorry"He Said As He Losin His Hands From Me

This Was Way Harder Than I Thought

"Sorry Can't Fix It Its Too Damaged..."I Said

He Got Off Me And I Sat Up On The Bed

"Are We Getting A Divorce"He Asked Me Looking At Me As If I Broke His Heart

"I Don't Know...I Just Need Space August"I Said

"Space How You Gon Be Without Me"He Asked

In My Mind I Was Thinking I Have No Idea I Don't Even Think Its Possible

Than He Asked "How Long?"

"Im Not Sure I Just Wanna Time To Self August To Figured Out What I Really Want I Need To Figure Out If Im Willing To Saved The Marriage You've Destroyed"I Said

"What About Ayden And Azian"He Asked

"You Will Still Be There Father I Won't Keep Them From You Can Come See Em When You Want Im Staying With My Mother For A While"I Said

"You Ain't Gotta Do All You Can Stay I'll Leave I Don't Wanna Take The Boys From Theiir Home ,I'll Stay At Travis Crib"He Said

"I Can't Believe Were Separating I Hope All Them Hoes Was Worth It You Just Potentially Lost Ya Family"I Cried Out

Watching August Pack Up All His Things,Kissing Our Children Goodbye,And Seeing Him Leave Was One Of The Worst Thing That Ever Happen To Me

My Whole World Is Now Completely Gone