I needed answers and I needed them now. I sped to the only place where I knew I could find them. I was probably going to end up with a hundred speeding tickets but I didn't care. That was the least of my concerns.

I pulled into the driveway and raced up the porch. I could probably crack the glass pane by how hard I was pounding on the door. Not long after, the door was opened. But as soon as she saw who it was, she tried to slam it in my face. I pushed my foot forward, preventing the door from slamming shut.

« Please Stelly. Please just let me in. I just wanna talk », I pleaded.

« So what you can throw more insults at her?!, you asshole! », she yelled

« Pleas-«

« You know you don't deserve her Alejandro. You never did and you never will », the venom in her voice made my toes curl.

« Please Stelly. I know I'm the last person you want to see right now. But I..I may have just destroyed the best thing to happen to me. I need to know. I need to know »

She gave me a sad glare and reluctantly moved away from the door frame, letting me in. She ushered me to the couch and took the seat opposite. « What do you want? »

« Diana told me that she married Michael for me. That she tied herself to him because of me. I've tried to figure it out but I can't. But I know you know Stelly », her face took on a pained expression, « Please Stelly. Just tell me the truth"

She took a deep breath before recounting her tale. "Back when you guys were together, Diana's dad was in terrible debt. The company was in bankruptcy. They were losing everything, investors, clients. You name it. It pretty much looked like that was it for them. Everyone thought it was. But then came Michael Thayers. He told her dad that he was willing to give him whatever amount needed to rebuild the company. But at a price », she chuckled humorlessly. « He said he saw Diana at a charity function. That he knew she was meant to be his. His property. Her dad didn't even think twice. He agreed to the deal. But there was just one problem. Diana. She refused to agree to it, said her heart belonged to you alone. He threatened to disown her but she didn't care. As long as she had you, nothing else mattered. Remember when you guys were planning to elope? »

« Yes », I answered

« Well Davy followed you guys once and overheard you. Back then he was a Daddy's boy, so he went straight to Daddy. Then one day Diana got a video. Of you, beaten, bloodied »

« The day I was kidnapped »

« Yes. Her father told her that if she didn't leave you and get with Michael, she would be receiving a video of your dead body », my blood ran cold, « You know we thought he was bluffing, thought that he didn't have the heart. But where Desmond Prichard lacked in fearlessness, Michael Thayers made up for it. She had no choice Alejandro. She wasn't even allowed to tell you the truth. That's why she told you all that nonsense. Diana loved you more than anything in this world. That's why she was willing to sell herself to that monster, just for you. And yet this is the barbaric treatment you show her »

I hadn't even noticed I was crying till I felt my cheeks getting wet, « Stelly I...I didn't know »

« Did you have to Alejandro?, did you have to before you accord her some simple human decency?. She's done nothing but love you her entire life, she sold herself for you »

There were no words to describe the feelings I felt. Numbness, Sadness, Guilt. Nothing quite fit the bill. But whatever it was, it was a myriad of all those emotions and more. Diana had let herself be beaten, raped by that asshole just because she wanted to save my life. « I'm so sorry Stelly »

« Sorry?!, you think sorry's going to make up for the things you said?, the things you did?! »

« I-«

« Just get out Alejandro! »

I snapped my head up. She didn't seem to be joking. I walked out and turned to tell her goodbye when she slammed the door in my face.

I defeatedly walked to my car, got in and closed the door. Then I let the waterworks run. My Diana, my sweet sweet Diana. All she had done, she had done for me. Stelly was right. I didn't deserve her. I never will. I solemnly drove home.

I needed to apologize to Diana. Even if she never forgave me, I was going to spend the rest of my life making it up to her. No matter how long it took me.

By the time I got home, I was done crying. I didn't want Benjy to see me and get worried. As I crossed the foyer, the first thing I heard was the wailing of my son. I rushed to his room, to find him in a corner, huddled. I looked at his nanny and was rewarded with a helpless stare.

« Benjy? »

As soon as he heard my voice, he ran over to me, « Daddy »

« What's wrong little man?, why are you crying? »

« Momma's mad at me », he said dejectedly

« What makes you think that? »

« When she came back home she was crying, she wouldn't talk to me. I'm really sorry Daddy. I promise I'm going to eat my veggies and pick up my toys »

My heart broke even more. He was bearing the consequences of my actions, could this feeling of guilt get any worse?.

« No Benjy, you've got it all wrong. Momma isn't mad at you. She's just...she just has a lot to deal with right now. Trust me buddy, she's not mad »

« Promise Daddy? »

« I promise. Why don't I go get her so she can tekk you herself? »

He nodded enthusiastically then went back to playing with his toys. I then turned to the nanny

« Where's my wife? », I asked

« Well that's the thing Sir. When she got home crying, she went straight to the bedroom and straight back to the car. Then she sped off »

« Well where did she go? »

"She didn't say Sir. All she said was that she needed to think", she replied.

Going to think?, where was sh-. I ran back to the car. I needed to get to her now or never. She never knew the terrain well. She could get lost. I promised Benjy I would bring his mother to him. It's about time I made good on that promise.

I needed to get away. That was all that ran through my head as I zipped out of the driveway. I felt so guilty leaving my little boy behind wondering. But I couldn't let him see his mother this way.

I needed to make a decision. As much as Benjy loved Alejandro, I couldn't bear to be under the same roof as a man who basically called me a prostitute. I needed to be the best mother I could be for Benjy. And I couldn't do that while I was with Alejandro. I had honestly thought we could move past things and build a life together. But I was wrong.

For how long had I carried this weight in my heart?. Quietly accepting whatever he threw at me. Just because I thought I deserved him. I had gone through unimaginable hell at the hands of Michael, just because of the eternal love I had for him.

The Alejandro I had fallen hopelessly in love with, was long gone. I don't think I could recognize him anymore.