{don't tell me what to do and

don't tell me what to say

please when i go out with you don't put me on display

___

I looked into the crowd, staring at Carter's pack. After the Moon Goddess disappeared with Carter and Jason, everyone looked confused. The wolves stood up, some groaning from having to kneel for so long. A lot of the began to stare at me, wondering what we should do, like I was their leader. I wasn't, was I?

A pack member came forward, one that had beaten me before. He stared at my bruised body and bowed before me. "I hope you can forgive me, my dear Luna, for the pain I have inflicted upon you. Carter was holding my children hostage and if I didn't do as he said, he would kill them. I hope you have it in your heart to let me live and become a part of your pack."

Many of the other wolves agreed with him. Most of the wolves began to kneel before me, murmuring apologies to me. Were they all afraid of what the Moon Goddess had done to their former Alpha? Were they all afraid of me too?

I stared into the crowd and looked at some of the wolves that weren't kneeling, that believed Carter was still their Alpha and in charge. My eyes wandered around, looking for one person in particular. I wanted to tell him sorry and that I do love him. I wanted to work things out with him. My eyes contacted Beta Ryan and he gave me a relieved look. I still couldn't contact my wolf or any of my pack members. I didn't know what to do so I stood on the stage, staring at everyone. I saw some of my pack members and suddenly felt safe.

One of my pack members came forward, concern written all over his face. "Are you alright, Luna? You're looking a little pale. I think it's time to get you home."

The headache I had was growing stronger and I fell forward, throwing up all over the stage and my pack member. He caught me before I fell off the stage. Something didn't feel right. What was wrong? What else could possibly be wrong this time?

Before I could even say sorry, I fell limp in his arms and let darkness surround me

***

A beeping noise woke me up. It was loud and piercing and all I wanted to do was continue sleeping.

Haven't you done enough sleeping already?

My eyes shot wide open and I smiled. My wolf was back! I could hear her again.

You're back?

I never went away. I just couldn't talk, I was frozen. I'm sorry I couldn't protect us. The wolf's-bane really took a toll on me. The entire time, I felt everything. I'm sorry this happened again to us.

I frowned. All of this happened because of me. I don't deserve my wolf. I don't deserve Hannah, Ryan, or even Chance. They deserve so much more than me. All I cause them is pain and misery. When will I be happy?

I blinked back the tears that were trying to fall and looked around the room. The room looked familiar and I knew I was back in my pack again. The TV was on but the volume was off. An IV was in my wrist, pumping something into me. The couch under the window was occupied by my grandparents. My parents were sitting in two chairs, staring at the TV. Chance's head was laying on my bed, his hands resting on my legs. I looked down and saw no more bruises on my body, only a few cuts and scrapes. My wolf was healing us, slowly but surely.

The door to my room opened and Ryan walked in, holding six cups of coffee. He almost dropped the tray when our eyes met. "Bailey!"

My parents turned their heads and both rushed over to me. Ryan woke my grandparents up and they came over too. They all kissed my forehead and started crying. Chance woke up and backed up, letting my family fuss over me.

My mom sniffled back some tears and grasped my hand. "We thought we lost you. I'm so sorry we didn't find you sooner. We love you, so much. I hope you always remember that."

My grandma came over next. "Never let that piece of shit ever get to you, do you hear me? You are a survivor. You are strong and you're not alone this time. We are here for you, Bailey."

I closed my eyes and nodded my head, letting a few tears shed. My dad and grandpa squeezed my hand and smiled. "I think we need to give Chane a moment with her."

Everyone agreed and began leaving the room. Ryan lingered for a moment. "I'm glad you're okay. We never stopped looking, I hope you know that. I'm going to go and tell Hannah and Chance's parent's that you're awake. We love you, Bailey."

Ryan left and I looked over at Chance, who couldn't even look at me. Was I that repulsive? Did he not want me anymore? Was he going to reject me? Was this what heartbreak feels like?

"Chance." My voice cracked and I sucked in a deep breath, feeling like I was going to cry. "I'm sorry for how things were left. I want to move forward with you. I thought a lot about us when I was with Carter and I want you, despite your flaws and the things you've done. I know that wasn't you, it had to be something else. I just want us back."

Chance turned and his eyes were red and bloodshot with tears waiting to fall down his face. He came closer to me and grabbed onto my hand. He kissed my knuckles. "You have nothing to be sorry for. You did nothing wrong and I'm the one that is deeply sorry. I can never forgive myself and I will live in regret for the rest of my life. I got blood taken and it came back positive for the drug Wolffian. It's a powerful drug that fucks up your wolf and you lose control and can't come back. We think Jason was slipping it into my drink every morning. You can't smell it or taste it. I didn't mean to hit you, I swear. It was my wolf and we're sorry for the pain we've caused you. I want to start over again. I want to take you out on dates and go from there. Can we do that? Can we move on from this?"

I nodded, wiping away the tears that fell from my face. I didn't ask any more question on Wolffian but I will be hounding Hannah with questions later on. "I just want to forget about this entire thing."

Chance nodded. "Me too, love."

I sighed and patted the spot on the hospital bed next to me. I moved over a little bit and frowned at the soreness of my body. Chance looked hesitant at first but I reassured him that I would be fine and that I do trust him.

He's not Carter

When Chance came into bed, I snuggled a little bit closer to him and he rubbed lazy circles on my back through my hospital gown. I played with the wires attached to my arm. "So, what happened?"

"What happened with what?"

"After I fainted? What happened with Carter's pack? Are they dead? Alive?"

Chance took a deep breath. "Some are dead. The wolves that retailed against us were killed. The other were being held there against their will after the original Alpha was killed. In the end, I gave them a choice. If they wanted to stay with us, they could. If they didn't, then they became rouges. More than half were initiated into our pack last night and some also went to Brandon's pack."

"They're here now?"

Chance froze. "If you're uncomfortable with that, I can kick them all out."

I shook my head. "No, don't do that to them. Not all of them were bad. Many of the members were kind towards me. Some sneaked me food and water whenever Carter wasn't around. It felt goo to have someone on my side."

He nodded and I continued asking my questions. "What happened with me? Why did I faint? What's being pumped into me right now through this IV and why is it purple?"

Chance looked down at me. I moved away from him a little bit so I could look him in the eyes. A weird feeling settled into my stomach and I knew the next few words weren't going to make me happy. Chance blinked away some tears. "I just want you to know that no matter what would have happened, I would still love you regardless and I would've loved the baby just as much."

I felt my heart stop beating. "Baby?"

Chance nodded. "Carter got you pregnant. However, with him injecting all of the wolfs-bane into you, he killed the fetus inside you. Right now, doctors are pumping antibiotics into you to kill whatever was remaining of the bane. I'm so sorry, Bails."

I turned away from Chance and stared out the window. I shrugged one shoulder and sighed. "I wouldn't want the baby anyway. I wouldn't want a baby that was the result of me being raped. The baby dying was a good thing."

Chance went to say something but I stopped him. I told him I was tired and just wanted to sleep.

In reality, I just wanted to nurse my broken heart.

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