Sisters. In shows or in movies they seem to love each other no matter what. Patton is something else entirely. I thought she was finally going to be there for me when she invited me to come to Seattle. But one visit from dad in the 2 years I've been staying here messed everything up. And what she said to me today was unforgivable. It was worst than what she said to me when I left Florida to move to France.

"I'm a stranger to this family." "I almost forgot you even existed." I guess I would add those phrases to the list of hurtful words my family has called me over the years.

I basically have no family that likes me.

The urge to cut was there, burning inside but I couldn't. Mostly because Michael would become a little bitch and nag me about it. He would probably even call that bitch Connie to come back and help me sort my "feelings".

Fuck feelings. There nothing but a pain in my ass.

Anyways ever since Patton left Tiffany has been holding me in a hug for at least 20 minutes. I mean I know I was the one who initiated it but I was over it in 2 minutes.

"Tiffany, you can stop hugging me now," I said awkwardly and I tried to move her away from me.

"Are you sure? Do you want to talk about what happened?" Tiffany said very concerned.

That just irked me. I don't like to talk about the things that go wrong with my family.

"No. Thank you tho" I said in a reassuring voice.

"You never tell me anything about your family Jeanie. Is what just happened the reason why?" Tiffany poked.

"Tiffany my family is complicated. You wouldn't understand" I sighed.

"That's because you never tell me. How am I suppose to understand something when you never tell me. I've known you for almost 3 years and you haven't told me anything about your family" Tiffany snapped. And then I remained silent. I pressed my lips into a thin line and looked at my hands fidgeting.

Michael wanted to know about my past. Tiffany did too and I didn't know what to do. I could tell them but the story is very very sad. I could lie but that would be too obvious.

"I'll tell you, Tiffany. I just need some time to work up the courage." I whispered.

"When"

"To be honest Tif. I've.... I've been seeing a therapist... and I still haven't told them the story" I struggled to say.

"You're seeing a therapist?" she asked softly and then put her hand on my shoulder.

"Yea" I whispered.

"Well please promise me you'll tell me before you kick the bucket" Tiffany said trying to lighten the mood.

"I will. I promise"

"Well, what do you wanna do tonight? I'm off. We can drink the day away" she asked.

"Well actually Tiffany I'm temporarily moving out"

"Why "

"There's this little threat that has come to town and Michael is trying to act protective" I explained.

"Shaw wants you to move in with him to protect you? Why would he give a shit? What have you not told me about you two?" she asked confused.

"Nothing big has changed," I said vaguely.

"So he's still the same Jackass we hated before, right?" She said a little amused. I didn't say anything and just looked at my hands.

"Right?" Tiffany said as she poked me lightly in the shoulder and that triggered a small smile to appear on my face.

"I don't know..." I sighed through my smile.

"Sometimes he's great but then he goes back to being a crazy dictator with a stick lounged up his ass" I explained.

She gasps before she started talking and looked at me "Girl you been looking at his ass?" she teased.

"Eh sometimes" I giggled.

"So I guess the year thing isn't happening," she asked.

"Ugh. Now I can't tell you anything about that because I am still in the dark. He said it was supposed to be for a year but he's been starting to act like he's my actual husband. He's told me things about him, I think he cares for me, he even told me he has feelings for me"

"And what did you say" she questioned.

"Surprising the same."

"Are you sure those aren't just feelings?" she asked.

"What do you mean," I said confused.

"Do you love Michael?" she said bluntly.

"Never say that word again" I snapped.

"What? It's not bad" Tiffany snapped.

"Love is a very very very Strong word to use in this context," I said trying to make an excuse.

I couldn't love Michael and he couldn't love me. My father always said that I would never understand love because I didn't deserve it. Unwanted things like me couldn't be loved.

"The way you talk about him makes it seem that way" Tiffany pointed out.

"Oh, yea? And how do I talk about him exactly?" I said.

"When you say his name you have this stupid smile and you don't look at me. Your eyes look up at the sky like your in visioning him in your mind. And you usually trash talking him by now" Tiffany said in a light happy voice.

"I do not" I denied with a blush.

"Whatever you say. I'm just telling you how I see it.... So you guy's are gonna hang out tonight right?"

"Yup"

"What are you planning on doing"

"Chinese food and a movie," I said simply and then she slapped me in the face so hard I thought my jaw was gonna dislocate.

"Tiffany, what the actual Fuck" I exclaimed in surprise.

"That's a basic bitch move Jeanette" she yelled.

"What do you want me to do" I snapped as I held on to my red cheek.

"I don't know but come up with something else. And those better not be the clothes that your gonna wear" she said and then made a gesture to the outfit I was wearing. It was my dress pants and white T-shirt from work. It didn't look that bad. Michael ripped my other shirt in the office.

"What do you suggest I wear than"

"Something outgoing. Have you gotten the D yet because now's the fucking time"

"Tiffany," I said embarrassed and then looked down to the floor to hide my blush.

"By that response, I can verify that you have already broken that hymen with his big, juicy-" Tiffany was about to finish but I didn't want to hear her ending.

"Tiffany shut the hell up" I groaned and covered my red face with my hands.

"Come on let's go," Tiffany said and then sprang up from the couch.

"Where," I asked curiously.

"The sex shop. Where else?" she said as she held out her hand so I could get up to.

"I am not going," I said and then slapped her hand away.

"Girl this has to be special. Better then special. Fucking magical." she said dead serious. I sat there looking at her with a hard face but I gave up on my fight.

"Nothing too outgoing" I sharply and then got up the couch. She basically pulled me out the door and then pushed me into an Uber. All the way there Tiffany gave me tips on how to take charge of the situation.

I was nervous. I've never been to these kinds of shops and the topic of sex was very uncomfortable to talk about. I was never formally given the talk by an adult or anyone for that matter.

How was I going to look a dildo in the face?

"Oh Jesus" I groaned as we came face to face with the store.

"Shut up and get going," Tiffany said and then pulled me into the store.

"Hey Tiffany," the store cashier said and then Tiffany gave a smile and a wave. I, on the other hand, was following behind Tiffany awkwardly.

"How do they know you?" I asked confused.

"I came here all the time to buy things for me and James to use. By the way, Foreplay is key" Tiffany said. I responded with a groan.

"I think you should wear some lingerie. Because you know it's your first time with this stuff." Tiffany suggested.

What about the cut marks? I asked myself. Cuts aren't fucking sexy.

"Does lingerie come with pants?" I asked nervously.

"Ugh don't tell me you don't want him to see your legs. I don't know why you are so embarrassed by them?" Tiffany groaned. She didn't know I cut obviously.

"Fine no leggings," I said defeated.

"What about this?" she said as she held up a piece of clothing.

"I might as well not being wearing clothes" I responded and then she glared at me.

"What about this"

"Do you really think he'll be able to undo that?"

"Fine what about this," she asked and there was a pause. I examined it.

"I like it."

"Really," Tiffany said with excitement and surprise.

"Yea. I mean the fabric is thin but its the only thing in here that looks like actual clothes"

"Great. Beth ring this up for us" Tiffany said excited and then ran to the cashier.

I wonder what he was going to say about this?

"Now I'm going to lend you a coat"

"Coat?"

"Yes, a coat. You need to surprise him. Not right at the door", she explained and I kinda got what she was saying.

After we rang the nightie out we went back to her apartment and Tiffany went through her clothes to get a cute coat.

"Nice. Is it clean?" I asked as I hesitantly took it from her.

"Don't worry woman I have no STD"s and I washed that every time I use it."

"Great..." I said and then put in the bag with the nightie.

"Tiffany... I'm a little nervous" I said truthfully. Michael and I have only hooked up an estimate of two times and they were just flings. Nothing much. But now if feels like it could make or break the thing we have depending on how tonight goes. What if I screw it up? What if he laughs at me?

"You can do this mission, Jeanette. I believe in you."

"Sex is a mission," I asked amused.

"Of course it is. Now make me proud and get that man's banana"

"Banana?" I asked as I let out a few laughs.

"You won't let me say the other word so I have to say Banana" she explained through her chuckles.

"I won't fail chief," I said as I gave her a quick salute and then I left. I made a quick stop to the market and got a strawberry tart and then went home to start cooking dinner. I made some pasta with Alfredo and chicken. Then I put a bottle of wine in the fridge along with the tart.

After that, I went upstairs to start getting into my attire. I took a shower and then as I was drying off I looked at the black nightie. It was so revealing. More than anything I had ever worn and I was starting to feel self-conscious. But I pushed that thought aside and got dressed.

After 4 hours I heard a knock on the door. It wasn't that dark out.

"Michael," I said as I opened the door.

"Dimples. Nice coat," he said and then pecked me on the cheek.

"Thanks"

"So how was seeing your sister," he asked softly.

"Um.. it was good." I lied with an assuring smile.

"Are you sure? Because if you want to talk about it I'm here for you" He asked. Again with this family crap. It's getting old. It's only me that has issues. Never him. Barely anyone from his past has caused him any constant problems besides that bitch, Cindy. Meanwhile, mine seem to keep fucking hunting me down every day like I'm their fucking prey.

"I'm good. Now, lets go the kitchen and I'll show you what I have" I said changing the subject as I walked to the kitchen.

"I thought you were ordering take out? Did you make this?" he asked surprised.

"Eh, I changed my mind. And Of course."

"Well, it looks great. Thank you" Michael said.

"Before we dig in let me take this coat off. It's getting a little hot." I said and then I slowly untied the coat and then slide it off.

When I glanced at Michael his eyes were wandering all around my body. It was very intimating but there was no turning back. I placed the coat on one of the chairs to hang and then went to the fridge to the get the wine. I put it on the counter.

Suddenly there was a body pressed against my back.

"I did like the coat but I think I like this outfit a little bit more," Michael said in a husky voice and his hands wrapped around my torso.

"Well I did have a little help from someone," I said softly.

"Not a guy friend right," he asked.

"Jealously looks good on you" I giggled and then he spun me around to face him.

"You love to test me, Jeanette," he said as he brushed his lips against mine.

"If I don't who will?" I asked. He didn't answer. I gave him a peck on his lips and he was going to go back for another but I pushed him away.

His face looked surprised.

"What?" he asked.

"I'm hungry. Aren't you Chuckles?" I said with an evil smirk. Then I grabbed the wine from the counter and swayed my hips as I walked to the table.

"I'm a little preoccupied at the moment," he said in a raspy voice as he was holding his chin and still drinking in my appearance.

"Well I am "

"Why do you like playing these games?"

"There fun" I simply said with a shrug as went to the table and poured two large cups of wine. I set one on either side of the table and went to sit in my chair.

"Please sit" I offered as I gestured for him to sit down. He scoffed and then sat in his seat. We sat in silence. There was a lot of tense in the air and we kept glancing at each other.

When I was done I got up from my seat.

"Well this was fun but I better brush my teeth and get to bed," I said casually as I walked away. When I was out of his sight I started to giggle as I ran up the stairs. Once I reached the room I went to the bathroom, freshened up and opened the door. Michael was there leaning on it with his tie undone and a smile showing some off his pearly teeth.

"What do you want Michael," I said softly through my smile. He grabbed my waist and pulled me to him. He was about to kiss me but I turned my cheek and a frustrated groan escaped his lips.

"What do you want Michael" I whispered in his ear.

"Jeanette, why must you be so difficult" Michael groaned.

"You're not answering the question," I said sharply.

"And you're not letting me kiss you," Michael said as he held my chin.

"How can I kiss a man who doesn't know what he wants?"

"I want a very annoying woman."

"I should call Cindy then" I teased and then he glared at me.

"Not funny"

"To me it is"I whispered and he just looked a me. Shit was getting serious.

"Let me kiss you," he said softly

"That's all you want?" I asked with a raised brow.

"I want you, " he said as his hands began to wonder.

"Well, you already have me. I'm right in front of you in case your to bl-" I was about to finish but he cut me off and plunged in for the kiss. He took my bottom lip and bit it while my hands went to pull his silky hair.

He responded with a groan and held my waist tighter with his hand. I moaned and pulled him closer me. Then he broke the kiss like an evil jackass andstarted to kiss my neck. I wasn't done playing with his lips.

"I like this outfit," he said as his hands went to slip off a strap on the outfit.

"You should wear it more often," he said as he was about to slip off the entire top but I pushed him away.

"My turn," I said as I took his hand and lead him to the bed.

"What exactly are you going to do?"

"Honestly I have no fucking idea" I laughed "But go with it," I said with a smirk.

I made him sit down and then I straddled him. I kissed him slower than he kissed me. He grabbed the back of my head with one hand and squeeze my ass with another. I guess he was enjoying it. Then it was time to kick it up a notch. My hands when to his chest and unbutton him. When my hand went further down and I discover a bulge that was being kept away by his pants. One hand stayed on top of it and started to rub it. He replied with a foreign noise that sounded like it came from the back of his neck. Then I broke the kiss and went to kiss his cheek, neck then chest. I was getting bored with the rubbing and so I decided to uncover Michael's little friend. Then his hands stopped me. I looked up at him in confusion.

"As much as I would like that to happen... not tonight," he said through a shaky voice and then suddenly picked me up and flipped us so I was at the bottom and he was on top of me.

"Can't take the heat" I teased.

"Not with you," he said and then peeled off the outfit I had on in a flash. I was very very very nude. I was very very very nervous and I guess it was too clear for him to see.

"Relax dimples," he said as he reached down to my thighs and started to go up but I halted his hands for a second..

"Please excuse the cuts I-" I started to say in a nervous voice and then he kissed me. He pushed my hands away and touched my more intimate item. I moaned into his mouth. He started to finger me now. First with one finger then with two then with three. I was praying to God that he didn't put his whole hand in there but he stopped and started to rub my clit. I broke the kiss from the touch and started to fidget a little but he held me in place with one hand on my hip as his other stroked me.

"So fucking wet" he groaned and then stopped his attack altogether. He left the bed.

"What the actual fuck Michael! Get your ass back here and do me." I yelled in frustration as I propped myself up on my shoulders and looked at him. He was playing with the buckle of his belt.