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I needed to tell Shoto that mating season is here, but I know it's been difficult trying to think of the words cause I honestly want to tell him, but I know something is holding me back. I don't know what but it won't allow me to tell him at all.

My mood has changed alot, it would be all over the place but it's mostly been depression to the point I've isolated myself in my room and locked the door so Shoto or anyone else doesnt try to see me. I've barely ate cause I would just throw it back up cause nothing is staying in my stomach at all. My skin has gotten paler (A/n: what I mean by that is you lost pigment in your skin. So you have a darker skin tone it basically went down a complete shades. Sorry if it confused you!) and now I'm looking sick. I have very bad under eye bags

Only the UA staff know what is going on. So lunch rush figured out a way for me to get proper nutrition without eating or throwing up. He made these pills that will give me enough to allow my body not eat away as fast. The counselor would come and do sessions in my room so I can talk about my new found depression but I know what's wrong with me, she just want to mentally prepare myself. My dad and Uncle Yamada have been contemplating on telling class 1A what I've been going through, but I begged them not to cause I'm not ready for Shoto to find out yet. Everyone in UA has been on edge cause this could be last year alive if Shoto doesn't mate with me at all. There has been many staff meanings to figure out what they should do. It always came back to,

"We don't want our student passing away when we know what will help her. We have to allow them to commence mating season"

But my dad and uncle yamada are the most difficult ones to get on board with it. While they are both teachers they don't want me to pass away when they know what would save me, but the family in them doesn't want me doing it this early in my teenage years. Making the staff trying to get them on board with mating. Saying they'll talk about safe sex and making either Midnight talking about Sex Ed with class 1A so they don't single me and Shoto out or just giving me a birth control pills and making Shoto wear a condom as well in secret.

How I know that Shoto is outside of my dorm room is my heart tugging towards the door as well as my demonic side go crazy wanting to be in his arms or wanting his affection, but I always push it down cause I don't want him to see me like this. I haven't seen him since he took away the raw meat. That was actually the last time since I saw everyone, Except for staff. I missed everyone, I miss reading in the common room with my friends as we all talked about anything. I miss messing with Bakugo with all of his friends, I just miss being with everyone. Especially Shoto.

"(Y/n)....are you in there?" Ochaco says and she knocks on the door but I stay silent.

"Mr. Aizawa told us we can't see you anymore because of personal reasons, but I can't help but worry for my best friend...." She says making me tear up.

"At least let me know that your okay." She says and I hear the heart break in her voice.

"Balcony..." I say quietly but enough for her to hear and I hear her running away from my dorm. I close my eyes as tears go down my face as I try saying his name again.

"Cerberus..." I say and I open my eyes again and I don't see a mastiff sized Cerberus at all.

"Hades....please help me." I say quietly as I feel more tears go down my face, but to no one's surprise. He didn't answer, he hasn't answered since the trial at true cross academy where he told me to be careful.

I then hear my balcony door open and I see Ochaco standing there out of breath and her eyes bloodshot red from crying so much cause she misses her friend. Until she sees me laying in my bed pale, very skinny, my (h/c) looking very dull and very bad under eye bags.

"What happened to you (y/n)..." she says as she walks over and with tears in her eyes.

"Mating season, now that I have a mate. I have to mate with them or I will die a slow painful death." I say as more tears go down my face.

"Who's your mate?" She asks.

"Shoto..." I say making her smile.

"(Y/n) that's a good thing. Your already dating todoroki." She says but I shake my head no.

"If we mate, that means its forever. I don't want that burden on him ochaco! I don't want him trapped in a relationship that he can never leave! So I rather die than make him feel trapped! He dealt with a lot and I'm not adding my problems onto of his." I say as tears flow down my face and I can feel arms wrap around my body.

"(Y/n)....please. I can't lose you...please talk to todoroki." She says as I feel tears drop on my skin from her.

"Ocha-"

"We need you. Especially Todoroki." She says but I just stay silent.

"He's been making more conspiracy theories. He's been asking Deku about All might way to much as well as making a conspiracy that All might have Deku his quirk. Can you believe that! He's going crazy (y/n), he started begging the counselor and Mr. Aizawa for answers but they silent." She says and I start coughing into my arm and away from her.

"Ochaco..if the class asks. Tell them I'm fine please." I say weakly.

"But (y/n) Todoroki will know I'm lieing." She says.

"Please..." I say with a pleading voice until I hear keys jingle and my dorm unlocked and my dad and the art teacher Hina comes in.

"(Y/n) miss. Hi- what are you doing here Ochaco?" My dad says and he shuts the door and locks it so no one comes in.

"I told her..." I say softly and Miss. Hina comes over towards me and sits on my bed and gives me a gentle hug.

"No wonder class 1 babes were worried about you...I had to see for myself." She says as a tear falls down her face and Ochaco goes to Aizawa as he explains to her on what's going on with more details.

"I'm so sorry you have to go through this, but I always be here for you. Madame movement wants to come here as well to get you to move around once you get better." She says but I start crying alittle.

"I'm not going to get better Miss. Hina at all.. unless I mate with Shoto and I can't do that to him. I rather suffer so he can be happy." I say softly and she looks at dad in anger.

"I know Hina, please calm down." My dad says and she nods and she gets her tablet out.

"What do you want me to draw for you. I can make it come alive!" She says and I look at the statue that shoto got me.

"Cerberus. Draw Cerberus. Please...." I say as I look at her making her tear up and nods and starts sketching him out as she has seen what he looks like.

"You missed the fight between class 1A and Mirio." Ochaco says and I nod.

"Mirio won." I say making Ochaco chuckle.

"We also did the provisional hero licenses. I passed! But Todoroki didn't..his mind was all over the place, we could all tell, even Bakugo tryed to get him to make him stay at the dorms. Endeavor even tried to get him to stay at the dorms, but he didn't listen..." Ochaco says and I look at dad and he nods.

"Dad..." I say and he comes towards me.

"Please tell Shoto...I can't have him act like that.." I say and he nods.

"Thank you..." I say and Ms Hina trys to bring Cerberus alive but it doesn't work at all.

"I'm sorry (y/n). I can't bring him alive." She says but I just give her a small smile.

"It's okay Ms. Hina, I'll see him soon." I say and she nods.

"You will get better. I promise." She says as she hugs me tightly and I hug her back.

"I will let Uncle Yamada and Principal Nezu about your decision, either tonight or tomorrow you will mate with him. Okay?" Dad says and I nod and he turns to Ochaco.

"You tell no one about what's happening. I don't want to hear Mineta begging to see or Iida telling saying it isn't appropriate. Got it?" He says

"Yes sir." She says and he nods.

"I believe (y/n) is tired. We should all leave." Dad says and I nod as I slowly fall asleep and Ms. Hina squeezes my hand and blows a kiss to me and I give a small smile.

"I'll see you soon in class." She says and I fall asleep before I can answer her, but I do feel a pair of lips on my forehead, I smile knowing who it is.

"I promise you, you'll get better hun."

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